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Post Your Modern Etiquette Questions Here

VRBeauty

VRBeauty

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Apr 2, 2006
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11,409
I’ll start.

If you’re using a toilet in a public restroom, and the person in the next stall is participating in what sounds like a business meeting, on speaker phone…

Is it OK to flush the toilet when you are finished with your business?
 
VRBeauty said:
I’ll start.

If you’re using a toilet in a public restroom, and the person in the next stall is participating in what sounds like a business meeting, on speaker phone…

Is it OK to flush the toilet when you are finished with your business?
Click to expand...

Yes!

My question:

Is it acceptable to be in public at a restaurant or on transportation (bus, train, plane, boat) and watch/listen to something on your phone without headphones?

Bonus question:

Kids chasing pigeons. Yay or nay?
 
I'm very uncertain how I feel about the whole idea of 'etiquette'.
I see it as a creepy sneaky way of converting your opinions and preferences into "facts" and getting others to agree because there is some idea that the more people who agree the more right something is. :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:
It has an certain odor reminiscent of religions.

I rather like the idea of ... do whatever you want, just don't hurt others.
As Matt Dillahunty says, 'Your right to swing your arm ends at my nose."
 
VRBeauty said:
I’ll start.

If you’re using a toilet in a public restroom, and the person in the next stall is participating in what sounds like a business meeting, on speaker phone…

Is it OK to flush the toilet when you are finished with your business?
Click to expand...
Yes, absolutely. That person chose to have a phone conversation in a public restroom so she takes what she gets! Would be the same in any noisy, crowded space.
 
FFS @kenny the issue is politeness and consideration for others. One of the reasons we're living in a world run amok is because people have lost the ability to have a modicum of consideration for each other. Social norms are necessary to prevent a total decline into savagery.

It's impolite to be loud in public either with one's voice or music because it forces others to hear what they don't want to hear and impinges on the ability for others to hear and to converse normally.

Yes -- it's ok to flush a toilet in a public restroom when someone next to it is yakking on a cell phone. It's impolite to subject the other person on the conversation to the sounds of a public restroom so double points lost for the idiot who makes those calls unless it's to 911.

Kids chasing pigeons -- teachable moment. Parents letting their kids run around in public spaces where they are an annoyance to others or cause safety issues is impolite.
 
I would absolutely flush my toilet, with no regards to the person in the next stall.

A big "no" to children chasing pigeons, stepping on bugs or any other such behaviors which do not show compassion for living things.
 
737liz said:
Yes!

My question:

Is it acceptable to be in public at a restaurant or on transportation (bus, train, plane, boat) and watch/listen to something on your phone without headphones?

Bonus question:

Kids chasing pigeons. Yay or nay?
Click to expand...

no !
that is animal cruilty and people like me enjoy feeding the birds and get p*ssed off when they get chassed away
 
Unless it is a necessary conversation I think phones in the bathroom are rude. Not only do I flush (it would be rude not to), but if the conversation is especially annoying I enact the “Who does #2 work for?!” scene from Austin Powers.
 
Matata said:
FFS @kenny the issue is politeness and consideration for others. One of the reasons we're living in a world run amok is because people have lost the ability to have a modicum of consideration for each other. Social norms are necessary to prevent a total decline into savagery.

It's impolite to be loud in public either with one's voice or music because it forces others to hear what they don't want to hear and impinges on the ability for others to hear and to converse normally.

Yes -- it's ok to flush a toilet in a public restroom when someone next to it is yakking on a cell phone. It's impolite to subject the other person on the conversation to the sounds of a public restroom so double points lost for the idiot who makes those calls unless it's to 911.

Kids chasing pigeons -- teachable moment. Parents letting their kids run around in public spaces where they are an annoyance to others or cause safety issues is impolite.
Click to expand...

“Savagery” is a bit dated and problematic, no? Yikes. GOD I LOVE THESE THREADS
 
I have an etiquette question after seeing Facebook pics of a colleague as a guest at a wedding…in. a. white. dress?!?! Is this considered ok now? :doh:

And hell yeah, I’d flush, maybe twice. If you’re going to be having convos in the public bathroom stall, you best be ready for the flush!! :lol:
 
Matata said:
FFS @kenny the issue is politeness and consideration for others. One of the reasons we're living in a world run amok is because people have lost the ability to have a modicum of consideration for each other.
Click to expand...

I agree, it's just manners and consideration for others.

kenny said:
I see it as a creepy sneaky way of converting your opinions and preferences into "facts" and getting others to agree because there is some idea that the more people who agree the more right something is. :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:
It has an certain odor reminiscent of religions.
Click to expand...

We have to have some kind of order in society. That's what laws are for on one end of the spectrum, and social niceties on the the other. I see religion as something else. Isn't that more about control and/or following rules so as to promise the afterlife that you hope to get?
 
737liz said:
Yes!

My question:

Is it acceptable to be in public at a restaurant or on transportation (bus, train, plane, boat) and watch/listen to something on your phone without headphones?

Bonus question:

Kids chasing pigeons. Yay or nay?
Click to expand...

Question 1. No. I think it's rude. I'd even extend that answer to others in your house that are sharing a common area doing other things.

Bonus: kids that chase pigeons need to be taught not to do it. It's not funny or cute.
 
Slickk said:
I have an etiquette question after seeing Facebook pics of a colleague as a guest at a wedding…in. a. white. dress?!?! Is this considered ok now? :doh:

And hell yeah, I’d flush, maybe twice. If you’re going to be having convos in the public bathroom stall, you best be ready for the flush!! :lol:
Click to expand...

I think yes, if it's clearly not a wedding dress. But it's a know your crowd thing. If it was a lace cocktail dress in ivory or ivory with beige or a linen sundress for example, I think it's fine. But it's going to vary by bride.

www.marthastewart.com

Can Guests Wear White to a Wedding? Experts Weigh In

Is it still taboo for a guest to wear white to a wedding? Wedding planners and stylists weigh in on whether or not family and friends can wear white attire to a wedding. While the traditional etiquette—that white is for the bride only—still applies, some modern exceptions do exist.
www.marthastewart.com www.marthastewart.com
 
I believe all the wedding guests wore white to Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck’s wedding.
 
Calliecake said:
I believe all the wedding guests wore white to Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck’s wedding.
Click to expand...

That's more of a theme wedding I guess. So not one person kind of sticking out. I wouldn't wear white to a wedding, but if it was the theme, then I'd go along and not think twice as the bride would have chosen the color/theme. Otherwise, why risk upsetting anyone at the wedding. There are hundreds of colors out there for someone to pick.
 
737liz said:
Yes!

My question:

Is it acceptable to be in public at a restaurant or on transportation (bus, train, plane, boat) and watch/listen to something on your phone without headphones?
Click to expand...
737liz said:
Yes!

My question:

Is it acceptable to be in public at a restaurant or on transportation (bus, train, plane, boat) and watch/listen to something on your phone without headphones?
Click to expand...
No way - that is SUPER annoying.

I also don’t like the pigeon chasing but yes my kid has done it. And yes I’ve stopped him. But the temptation is great for kids for some reason. :(
 
My question- crowdfunding. When is it ok? I admit it bugs me most of the time and seems tacky. But perhaps among the younger set it’s normal.
 
Mreader said:
My question- crowdfunding. When is it ok? I admit it bugs me most of the time and seems tacky. But perhaps among the younger set it’s normal.
Click to expand...

That's a good question. I know sometimes I'm a bit turned off when I see someone crowdfunding for some things. If it's for a funeral for someone's family who can't afford one then I guess i get it. But crowdfunding for a wedding or honeymoon seems kind of tacky to me. Do what you can afford. If it means going to the court house with only your witness, then do it. Why should others pay for something you want, but isn't really necessary. Would they crowdfund because they want a Mercedes but can't afford one? Seems the same to me.
 
I agree with Matata completely here. I also agree with Kenny.

Do what you want as long as you do not affect me negatively in any way.

That goes for your loud music, your loud telephone conversations in public (restrooms and otherwise).
Do not invade my space. With your noise, your smoke, your rude behavior.
Do not take your (noisy) infants and your children to a nice restaurant where others are trying to enjoy a peaceful meal if they cannot behave with respect towards others.

Or to a movie theater playing an R rated movie.
True story...(this happened a number of years ago), a woman brought all her young kids to an R rated movie and they proceeded to cry throughout. And when I politely asked her to leave (everyone in the theater was disturbed by the loud constant crying) she said she could not afford a babysitter and she wanted to see the movie. No care about the other patrons in the theater. Cannot make this stuff up.

If you cannot teach your kids manners (or if they are too young to learn at their age) keep them and yourselves at home. Please. I beg you. Think of others.

Do not play your music so loud in public that others ears hurt. How is that OK?
We have a real problem IMO. And that is a lack of kindness and polite consideration of others.

It is the degradation of society- this lack of manners and polite consideration we fail to give others.
The permissive nature of society today. To allow kids and adults to run wild.
To allow people to do as they please in public as if they were in private.
No, thank you.

I don't want to hear excuses.
Life is so hard.
I cannot afford a sitter.
Blah blah blah.
No excuses. Behave politely towards others.
Live your life but don't invade mine.

And you and your kids and your dogs, keep off my grass.
Please and thank you.

And cruelty to animals?
I won't stand by and let that happen.
I will do what I need to do and take full responsibility.
That's what we all need to do.
Take full responsibility for our actions.
Period.

Don't pass the buck. It starts with you. Behave with integrity.
All of us let's behave kindly and be considerate of others and take responsibility for our actions.
 
Lookinagain said:
That's a good question. I know sometimes I'm a bit turned off when I see someone crowdfunding for some things. If it's for a funeral for someone's family who can't afford one then I guess i get it. But crowdfunding for a wedding or honeymoon seems kind of tacky to me. Do what you can afford. If it means going to the court house with only your witness, then do it. Why should others pay for something you want, but isn't really necessary. Would they crowdfund because they want a Mercedes but can't afford one? Seems the same to me.
Click to expand...

Yes. I've seen GoFundMe for things like funding a student's study abroad, funding a friend's studio time to do a music album, funding (and this one really galled me) a guy who hadn't seen his daughter in years and wanted to take her to Disneyland. A month prior he was posting pictures of a music festival that he attended. A medical condition or funeral for a family that is struggling financially I can understand. But (and I hope it doesn't sound too callous) I have seen crowdfunding for medical things but the family has good jobs, insurance, nice house, etc. Anyway I'm thinking it's more acceptable among younger crowds maybe? But for me I just think - tacky!
 
Here is mine:

Should children give their seat to an adult if there aren’t enough seats?

We were at a family party this past weekend and I was surprised to see adults sitting on the deck stairs while kids were sitting in chairs. If it was one of my kids I would tell them to get up so an adult could sit. For reference, these were not toddlers, kindergarten and up.

ETA: Obviously this isn’t related to modern technology but in today’s child centered society, I wonder if this has changed with the times.
 
YadaYadaYada said:
Here is mine:

Should children give their seat to an adult if there aren’t enough seats?

We were at a family party this past weekend and I was surprised to see adults sitting on the deck stairs while kids were sitting in chairs. If it was one of my kids I would tell them to get up so an adult could sit. For reference, these were not toddlers, kindergarten and up.

ETA: Obviously this isn’t related to modern technology but in today’s child centered society, I wonder if this has changed with the times.
Click to expand...

I think yes, kids should give their more comfortable seats to their elders. If that’s where the older person would prefer to sit.

And on the subway people should give their seats up to pregnant women, anyone physically disabled, and to the elderly. It’s the right thing to do. When I was traveling on the subway I always always gave my seat up to those who needed it.
 
What does one wear to a job interview these days?! I'm speaking to people at very large financial firms and feel as though I need to show up in clothing befitting the institution and the position, but I've had the absolute worst time finding a proper suit. Every salesperson in stores where I've asked has looked at me as if I had a second head. "A proper suit." I might as well be asking for a blazer made of unicorn hide with sparkling rainbow lapels.
 
YadaYadaYada said:
Here is mine:

Should children give their seat to an adult if there aren’t enough seats?

We were at a family party this past weekend and I was surprised to see adults sitting on the deck stairs while kids were sitting in chairs. If it was one of my kids I would tell them to get up so an adult could sit. For reference, these were not toddlers, kindergarten and up.

ETA: Obviously this isn’t related to modern technology but in today’s child centered society, I wonder if this has changed with the times.
Click to expand...

Oh, this would make me mad. Not only are they taking up chairs, but they are dirtying the seats with their shoes! No one wants to sit on dirty chairs.
Another teachable moment lost.
 
For men a suit. For women maybe a dress with a jacket?
 
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