Poll: How open or narrow-minded are you?

[Jambalaya]

This is a bit of fun. Do you consider yourself to be open-minded, narrow-minded, or a mix? What things are you really laid-back about, and what things trigger your inner Judge Judy, if any?

It's been pointed out to me that I'm narrow-minded, and it's quite true to an extent. My name is Jambalaya, and I'm narrow-minded, sort of. I'm very narrow-minded compared to the general lax standards of today. However, I only have to spend half an hour in the company of my parents' generation to feel like a right-on hippie, so there's that.

I'm narrow-minded about:
Alcohol. I think it's horrendous stuff. I don't drink it. I think our society would be far, far better off without the stuff. It's just destructive. Just look at the sheer misery it causes with the way alcoholism ruins lives and causes road crashes. Considering the effect it has, I can't believe it's legal, really. It's only legal because we're so used to it. Imagine if someone said, "There's this great new substance and it tastes really nice - well, it tastes god-awful at first, you have to acquire the taste - and after one glass, you can feel really dizzy, plus you can get addicted and if you do, you'll always be in recovery. You can relapse after thirty years! Oh, and it raises the risk of many cancers. Shall we legalize it?"

Public loudmouths: Thanks for ruining my meal with your constant screaming. Is it really so hard to modulate your voice a little in public?

Pot: It stinks out everyone and every space around you, and it's bad for you. Like we need more substances for people to use and then get into their car. We already have alcohol and hard drugs for that!

Lack of grooming: I appreciate good grooming. It takes effort. I don't judge people if they've tried and they still look awful. I just love and respect that they've tried.

I'm open-minded about:
Swingers. I dated one, to my own surprise, for quite some time. My finest hour!! I only broke up with him because he wouldn't stop trying to pressure me to join in. That's what did it, not the fact that he swung.

Extra-marital affairs: I need to know the details before I judge. Some spouses treat their other halves like cr*p without ever breaking any laws, and imo they deserve all they get. But I do judge people who are all, "Oh, I have the world's best spouse, I just need more." The latter is horrible. So anyway, I don't judge at all about this, until I know the details. Then I judge away!

Fake tan: I don't care if it has a reputation for looking fake, it's the smart move to avoid skin cancer. I'd rather see someone with streaks on their skin than a tumor.

I can't think of anything else I'm open-minded about, without getting into heavy topics that we're not supposed to talk about.

Being somewhat narrow-minded gives me a set of principles to live by. I don't get drunk, scream in public, smell of pot, or have bad manners. And judging other people who do these things reinforces my standards and makes me feel good. But IRL, you'd never know. I wouldn't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but I do judge about certain things.

What about you?

 

[Dancing Fire]

I have many Mistresses Am I open minded?

 

[Jambalaya]

No, you don't!

 

[TooPatient]

Oh, interesting! I tend to be very opinionated about things that I feel I have learned about but like to keep quiet or ask for more information on things I am not familiar with. If people asked my opinion on certain topics, I would likely be called closed minded. On other topics, I would probably be called wishy-washy due to being so open minded. I would like to hope that I hear everyone who shares information regardless of the topic. Sometimes I find myself thinking my original view was too rigid. I may not completely agree with the other position, but I might see where they are coming from and agree with certain aspects.

So, I guess I am mostly open minded?

 

[doberman]

I'm very open minded when it comes to people's sexual orientation, race or creed. I dont care who you are, who you are attracted to, or who you worship as long as you're nice. Bonus if you love animals.

I am, however, very close-minded when it comes to people who like to spout drivel that doesn't take facts or science into account, and rely on blind nationalism instead of logic. Unfortunately these days that's about half the country.

 

[kenny]

Everyone's open minded about some things and closed minded about other things.

 

[Jambalaya]

But Kenny, what about YOU?

 

[MissGotRocks]

Everyone's open minded about some things and closed minded about other things.

That is absolutely correct. It depends on the subject as to how open minded we might find ourselves.

 

[kenny]

But Kenny, what about YOU?

I just wrote, "Everyone's open minded about some things and closed minded about other things."

"Everyone" includes me.

 

[Jambalaya]

What are your things, Kenny?

 

[Jambalaya]

Oh, interesting! I tend to be very opinionated about things that I feel I have learned about but like to keep quiet or ask for more information on things I am not familiar with. If people asked my opinion on certain topics, I would likely be called closed minded. On other topics, I would probably be called wishy-washy due to being so open minded. I would like to hope that I hear everyone who shares information regardless of the topic. Sometimes I find myself thinking my original view was too rigid. I may not completely agree with the other position, but I might see where they are coming from and agree with certain aspects.

So, I guess I am mostly open minded?

Yes, you sound pretty open-minded, TooPatient! Good for you, being able to hear others like you do.

 

[missy]

I just asked Greg and he said I am very open minded. I agree with that.

First the definition of what being open minded means. To me it means the ability to consider other perspectives and to be empathetic to other people, even when you disagree with them.

In that case I am open minded about the great majority of things. I have a strong ability consider all perspectives and to be empathetic even when I disagree. I see all points of view.

However, yes, I am close minded about certain things too.
If you are unkind and/or abusive towards people or animals that's it for me.
I don't need to see much more if I see you treat animals with cruelty or even indifference in the face of suffering. So yeah, close minded about that, because how one treats an animal is all I need to see to get who you are as a person.


For the most part though I give everyone a chance. I do not make my mind up immediately. Instead I listen and thoughtfully evaluate. I never judge a book by its cover and in that way I feel I am open minded.

You lose out on a lot if you don't listen with an open mind.
Nobody is an expert on everything and for the most part we still all have much to learn. IMO.
I love listening to others because I can learn so much more by listening rather than talking.

I know what I know but I don't know what I don't know.

 

[Jambalaya]

I know you're open-minded, @missy. It's super-sweet!

I judge away when I meet people, lol! I've stopped myself from judging in the past, which led me to spend time with people I shouldn't have done, and learned that being narrow-minded can really save you from some bad situations! I don't want to get into specifics, but let's just say that if you lie down with dogs, you catch fleas! And sometimes heartbreak, too.

I feel I've really earned my narrow-mindedness, y'know? I was open, and after my experiences I now think, when I meet someone who seems very much like a toe-rag, that they probably are a toe-rag. I think to myself, "You seem like a toe-rag. I can just TELL."

I really hope I never lose my filter. Can you imagine!

 

[Jambalaya]

Dating history is a good test of open/narrow-mindedness.

How diverse is your pool of exes? Mine's surprisingly diverse for someone who considers herself a narrow-minded judgemental old cow. I've dated people from different religions, different races, I've dated people who are both much richer than me and much poorer, people who are much more educated and much less educated than me, people who have lived a very different life from me. I'm Christian, but I've been out with three Muslims and two Jewish people, and loads of atheists. I think the swinger was my finest non-judgemental hour. (FYI, I don't regret that relationship at all. We'd probably still be hooking up if he hadn't kept pushing the swinging thing on me.)

I'm still judgemental though. I mean, tattoos. They're permanent! What are people thinking - especially when young! My niece got this ENORMOUS tattoo when she was young that covered her entire arm, and I was so appalled. She looked like a long-distance trucker! My then-husband let his judgement show when she unveiled it. BUT, I quickly realized that there was NO POINT because it's done, it's permanent, and that ghastly thing is never coming off, so you might as well roll with it. He said I did a good job of covering it up, asking questions and giving it a little stroke. (It was an animal.) I didn't want to hurt her feelings, even though I was feeling the judgement inside for sure! I think someone who's open-minded would have been truly OK with that tattoo.

 

[seaurchin]

I guess it depends on what is meant by "open minded" or "narrow minded." I listen to new information and will change my opinions based on it. However, I do have opinions.

As with the example above, I too would probably (privately) shake my head if I saw a young person with a large, prominent tattoo. But I don't think that would be narrow minded because I have solid reasons for my opinion. It's most likely permanent, we tend to change how we want to be seen by others over time, and it could unnecessarily close off options for that young person, such as giving a poor impression when trying for a professional job or with potential romantic interests.

However, if I learned that times had changed so much that such a tattoo no longer made an unnecessary poor first impression in ways that could be significant to that young person; or that the young person was actually a successful rock star whose image was enhanced by that tattoo; or that a new method of quick, easy, cheap tattoo removal had come out or etc., then I would change my opinion.

 

[Jambalaya]

^^ I mean, she could always cover it up for a job interview. I just thought it was ugly, and so very permanent!!

I'm talking about light-hearted things. This is just meant to be a bit if fun. It's odd that I would judge a tattoo but would go out with a swinger, really!

We human being are funny things.

But this thread isn't much fun so far because everyone talking in platitudes about how generally open-minded they are, without giving any examples of areas where they perhaps slip up a little!

I'm willing to bet that most of us are more narrow-minded than we care to admit. Or maybe that's just me. But I do admit it!

 

[seaurchin]

Idk, I'm not sure people necessarily realize when they're being narrow minded. I mean, don't we all think we make sense? (At the time at least lol).

 

[Jambalaya]

I think I'm quite open-minded with PEOPLE, as my dating history shows - unless you're obviously a toe-rag - but I get really judgy about things that don't really matter, like tattoos and bad manners. What can I say, it makes me feel good.

When terrible, terrible anti-Semitic things happen, I love to think back to times with my Jewish ex. He was committed to his faith, and I was committed to mine. We used to go to hotels to do naughty things, and at those times when terrible events happen, I love to remember what it was: a Jew and a Christian twined around each other in bed, making love in a world of hate. Take that, anti-Semites!

 

[Jambalaya]

Idk, I'm not sure people necessarily realize when they're being narrow minded. I mean, don't we all think we make sense? (At the time at least lol).

Haha, that's true!

 

[doberman]

Dating history is a good test of open/narrow-mindedness.

How diverse is your pool of exes? Mine's surprisingly diverse for someone who considers herself a narrow-minded judgemental old cow. I've dated people from different religions, different races, I've dated people who are both much richer than me and much poorer, people who are much more educated and much less educated than me, people who have lived a very different life from me. I'm Christian, but I've been out with three Muslims and two Jewish people, and loads of atheists. I think the swinger was my finest non-judgemental hour. (FYI, I don't regret that relationship at all. We'd probably still be hooking up if he hadn't kept pushing the swinging thing on me.)

I'm still judgemental though. I mean, tattoos. They're permanent! What are people thinking - especially when young! My niece got this ENORMOUS tattoo when she was young that covered her entire arm, and I was so appalled. She looked like a long-distance trucker! My then-husband let his judgement show when she unveiled it. BUT, I quickly realized that there was NO POINT because it's done, it's permanent, and that ghastly thing is never coming off, so you might as well roll with it. He said I did a good job of covering it up, asking questions and giving it a little stroke. (It was an animal.) I didn't want to hurt her feelings, even though I was feeling the judgement inside for sure! I think someone who's open-minded would have been truly OK with that tattoo.

I'm kind of close-minded about tattoos. I think they're hideous but I really try to hide my distaste for them around those who have them. My good friend is really into the body art scene, so my mouth says,"Oh that's pretty", but my brain is making retching noises.

Now I've outed myself as a liar - but sometimes the truth isn't the best way to go when it comes to giving your opinion. But it really depends on the circumstances. I had someone tell me they weren't getting their child the normal vaccinations because of all the risks. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard" was my response. How to win friends and influence people...not.

 

[lovedogs]

I've wanted a shirt for a while that says "dont worry, my tattoos dont like you either". My arms are pretty covered in tattoos and I love them. As for concerns about work, I wear long sleeves when working with children/families. I know that's what I need to do, and I suck it up and do it. Even when its hot. I knew that when I got the tattoos. So it isnt as though tattoos are career-ending. Even if someone has lots of them.

 

[Jambalaya]

I've wanted a shirt for a while that says "dont worry, my tattoos dont like you either".

Omg, I would DIE if I saw that! It would be like the T-shirt read my mind!!

I just don't like the dark-green color. Believe me, if you could get silver glitter tattooed onto your skin, I would be ALL OVER THAT!

 

[Jambalaya]

I'm kind of close-minded about tattoos. I think they're hideous but I really try to hide my distaste for them around those who have them. My good friend is really into the body art scene, so my mouth says,"Oh that's pretty", but my brain is making retching noises.

Now I've outed myself as a liar - but sometimes the truth isn't the best way to go when it comes to giving your opinion. But it really depends on the circumstances. I had someone tell me they weren't getting their child the normal vaccinations because of all the risks. "That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard" was my response. How to win friends and influence people...not.

That is hilarious!

I hide my dislike of tattoos, too. As much as they're not my aesthetic, I would never want to hurt the feelings of anyone who has them. Good job in being supportive of your friend! I was the same with my niece.

 

[seaurchin]

If anyone sees my tattoo at work, at least one of us should be arrested. Oops, did I type that out loud?

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

When it comes to music im very narrow minded
there arnt enough days left to get through all the Bruce Springsteen concerts i own
im not going to waste time listening to cr*p when i know im quareteened to enjoy Bruce more
this drives a lot of people crazy
but its how i roll !

 

[lilmosun]

I always try to see things from the other side - why people think, act or believe the way they do, even if I disagree. It helps me to sustain my believe that people are inherently good.

Where I draw the line is when people think they are entitled to take advantage of or do harm to others for their own personal gain.

Speaking of Springsteen - a side benefit of being a rabid fan is I've made many good friends from all walks of life that I probably wouldn't have taken the time to know otherwise because of our differences (@Daisys and Diamonds ..some of them have even introduced me to new music )