LiW Please talk some sense into me!

[patient1]

Firstly, my apologies for having so many topics lately... but I really need a sanity check!

Things have escalated SO fast between my BF and I as far as engagement (in a good way!). We're no longer using the ring book -- and he asked if I'd like to be involved in the purchase process (which of course I am!! And I assured him it won't 'kill' any of the excitement for me, heehee, but that's another story...)

We're going to a jewelers on Saturday morning that I visited yesterday and my BF keeps saying things to suggest he may very well purchase one on the spot! (This is an extremely reputable, local jeweler that is known for negotiating price lower than online outlets, by the way...but once again, that's another story) I'm also going home to visit my family next weekend and he's hinted that he needs to have to 'the talk' with my Dad, just in case it's our last trip home 'before'. Eeek!

My problem is that when I went to the jeweler they had a perfect oval (perfect for me anywho) and some basic platinum settings that would work for what I'm asking for already in the case -- but there was an engraved ring that caught my eye. In order to afford engraving I would need to get palladium instead of platinum to stay within budget, and I reaaaally don't care for white gold. BUT... a custom piece could take 6-8 weeks.

(FYI... I've researched palladium, I'm fine with the differences and the jeweler has a long history of working with palladium so that's not an issue. As far as white gold -- I have a 14K college class ring that has tarnished very quickly on me, etc. So I'm not a huge fan.)

I'm having a hard time. I keep imagining myself picking a setting that's already at the jeweler just so I can get proposed to faster... I'm not set on any particular setting -- it's the stone I'm more fixed on. But I'm afraid I'll rush this...

My BF and I are always so cautious, so logical... and for the first time in our 6 years I feel like we're finally being impulsive and saying 'let's just do it!' (Which I love!!!)

How impulsive is too impulsive?? Is waiting for a custom setting worth it? What if there are problems with a custom order and it takes even longer?? What if I don't like the results?? Isn't it nicer to have the setting right-there to try on before purchasing??

Once again, thanks to you ALL for seeing me through my LIW madness.

Any suggestions or words of wisdom you can bestow is MUCH appreciated. Thanks again!!

 

[Miscka]

Well, if it were me, I would wait for what I really wanted. Obviously, or else I wouldn''t still be with my BF! LOL!! I think engraved bands are so gorgeous, btw! Good luck with whatever you decide.

 

[patient1]

Just to follow up -- with a screen name like ''patient1'' and the tag ''good things come to those who wait'' I know I seem a bit silly...

But with my BF and I; I don''t want to be so patient anymore.

 

[KCCutie]

I''d be lying if I said I wasn''t a tiny bit jealous of sudden change of pace you''re experiencing, but I''m sure I''m not the only one

No really I''m just being silly! Good for you I''m so happy for you that you my not have to wait too long.

Is it the stone you really love? I say go to the store and try it on in the current setting and just see how you feel about it. Who knows it may speak to you. If that''s just not the right setting then see if they have a setting you do like maybe they can just re-set the stone you love in another setting. If the settings they have in stock just aren''t what you want them talk to them tell them what you really want. Maybe they have an upgrade policy (and even if they don''t maybe they will let you) get a simple setting for now and plan to upgrade to the "dream" custom setting when it''s done.

 

[patient1]

KCCutie: That's such a good point! They oval is actually loose at the moment. But if I do 'just pick a nice setting' and regret it later they do have an exchange policy that's pretty liberal ...another reason the store has such high acclaim. (The jeweler is Kruger's in Austin, TX by the by). I suppose the 'rock' is the hardest part of the equation to fill.

And Miscka you bring up a great point... I may find just what I want on Saturday and need to have it made custom. I'll do my best to hold true to my name-sake and be 'patient'.

 

[KCCutie]

No matter what you pick we can''t wait to see some pictures!

 

[surfgirl]

Sweetie, I know you''re excited about all of this but please, dont go and buy the first stone you see! You can get the stats, put it on hold, and come back here and post the stats on RT and see what people think, though ultimately you are the one who has to love it. Also, dont buy a setting just because it''s available now...If you can afford the engraved setting, it''s worth waiting for, really! Enjoy your shopping and TAKE A CAMERA!

 

[patient1]

*sigh* You''re right surfgirl...

It''s just so hard! eeek!

(BTW ''eeek'' has become the internal sound my brain makes every time I start thinking about rings... I IM my BF with it and he just laughs...)

eeeeek!

 

[bee*]

Date: 3/20/2008 4:47:04 PM
Author: surfgirl
Sweetie, I know you''re excited about all of this but please, dont go and buy the first stone you see! You can get the stats, put it on hold, and come back here and post the stats on RT and see what people think, though ultimately you are the one who has to love it. Also, dont buy a setting just because it''s available now...If you can afford the engraved setting, it''s worth waiting for, really! Enjoy your shopping and TAKE A CAMERA!

totally agree with surfgirl-get the one you want, even if it means waiting a little bit. It''s worth it, trust me. I had to do the same and everytime I look down at my finger I know it was worth the wait.

 

[luckynumber7]

i agree with the previous posters as well. please let us know what happens.

good luck!!!!

 

[anchor31]

Yay! Congrats on the progress! A custom ring IS worth it... Mine took a month and we are beyond thrilled.

 

[LostSapphire]

WAIT for the one that''s perfect!

In 10 or 20 years (or even sooner!

) you''ll be glad you got it right.

 

[swingirl]

I would certainly accept a proposal with a loose stone!!! The setting is worth waiting for since you''ll already be engaged!

 

[Keepingthefaith21]

I agree with the other ladies...and your signature - good things really do come to those who wait! So, if you do not find your dream setting this weekend, go custom. I know I am a very impatient person (when I order things on line I track the package every day) but when it comes to The Ring, I think it''s more important to make sure you are getting EXACTLY what you want.

Super excited to hear about your progress though!!!!! Good luck this weekend and remember to breathe and try to supress the urge to just get any setting...unless you do find your perfect setting!!!! If you can take some photos this weekend, I''d love to see what you are thinking of getting

 

[LegacyGirl]

Date: 3/20/2008 9:41:08 PM
Author: Keepingthefaith21
I agree with the other ladies...and your signature - good things really do come to those who wait! So, if you do not find your dream setting this weekend, go custom. I know I am a very impatient person (when I order things on line I track the package every day) but when it comes to The Ring, I think it''s more important to make sure you are getting EXACTLY what you want.

Super excited to hear about your progress though!!!!! Good luck this weekend and remember to breathe and try to supress the urge to just get any setting...unless you do find your perfect setting!!!! If you can take some photos this weekend, I''d love to see what you are thinking of getting

Ditto!!

 

[patient1]

Thanks again!! So after an afternoon with some friends at a pub (not talking about rings, engagement or money), a good night''s sleep and a morning at work I think I''ve finally calmed down... some.

Y''all make a great point... If this weekend I find the perfect setting and it needs to be custom made, so be it. That just means I have more time to find the perfect diamond. And there is no reason that I HAVE to find anything this weekend.

If anything, it''s nice that the shoe is on the other foot this time... For once, my boyfriend is the one who is anxious to get a ring! (haha) I should savor this because it may never happen again.

 

[Allison D.]

I''d echo the other gals in saying ''don''t rush it''.

Other gals here have been in a similar position and have regretted buying fast. Mara was one of them....she was so excited when Greg decided he was ready that they bought fairly quickly and perhaps a bit impulsively. As she learned more about stones, she realized that perhaps she''d jumped the gun a bit and wished that she''d been more deliberate and careful about choosing the right stone.

When she realized she really wanted to change the stone for one that was better cut, Greg was initially a bit resistant to the idea; he''d become a bit ''attached'' to the stone he proposed with. Thankfully for her, that passed and she was able to upgrade.

From that experience, she always cautions not to rush through it, and I''d echo that. You''re SO close now, and it''s happening. That''s 95% of the battle...LOL. Take your time and get it right so you''ll be pleased with your choice for a long time.

 

[star sparkle]

Like the others here have suggested, I think you should wait for "the one." BF and I went ring shopping quite a few times and I came thisclose to pulling the trigger on one that I liked, but didn''t love. I tried it on at least 10 times over many different visits, almost trying to will myself to love it because it was so similar to what I really wanted, but not quite there.

After some discussion with my BF, he agreed that it would be best if we went the custom route because then I would be getting exactly what I wanted and wouldn''t have to compromise on anything. And even though I haven''t yet seen the ring in person (he won''t let me until he proposes), he tells me every single day how pretty it is and that he''s really glad we didn''t compromise what I wanted for the one in the store that we could have gotten at least a month sooner.

 

[patient1]

Hi Ladies!

To update: Ring shopping went really well!! My BF loved the experience actually... he said he had a great time!

I posted the oval I found here:
https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/1-00-ct-g-si2-oval-small-black-inclusion-4500-worth-it.81434/

My BF is willing to put money down, but he''s waiting for me to give him the go-ahead. So is this a good deal??

If you would like to respond to this thread or the one on Rocky Talk I''d great appreciate it!!!

One step closer, and I''m so excited!!!

The lady who helped us said she would email me some images of engraved bands that I can start considering.

 

[designchica]

coming from someone who was in your shoes and is about four weeks into the waiting process for my custom ring...I have to say it is worth the wait. Sure, I''d have my ring already if I''d just gotten what was at the store and yes it is driving me absolutely nutso waiting for this ring to arrive. However, it is nice to know that when my ring finally arrives, it is the ring of my dreams and not just somethign i selttled on because I could get it faster. You will be kicking yourself if you do that.