Plan B

[walmartshopper]

Here''s the deal. I have the ring and was planning on proposing this coming Tuesday at Disneyland. We''ve talked to our parents, friends, and a pastor at our church and they all support us. However, she decided she doesn''t want to go to disneyland anymore. I can''t really push it since it would be obvious that something was up. So now I''m in an odd situation. The original plan fell through, and now she''s expecting me to propose at any time. The thing is, I want it to be a complete surprise, and if I set up some kind of romantic evening it would hardly be a surprise. Even if I set up some "decoy" dates to keep her guessing, she will still be expecting it any time we do something romantic. So now I''m considering proposing at more of a random, less romantic time in order to make it a true surprise. I remember reading that somebody on here woke up his girlfriend straight out of bed and asked her. So I''m trying to come up with a way to make it special, memorable, and surprising all at the same time. Do you guys have any suggestions on how I could accomplish all this? Also, a question for the ladies... what would be more memorable for you, a proposal that completely surprises you with its random timing, or a romantic evening where you knew what was coming? I know it will vary and there is not one right way to do it, but I guess I''m just looking for ideas and whatnot. Thanks!

 

[anchor31]

Since you're no longer going to disneyland, does that mean that any kind of romantic trip is out of the question? If not, you could take her somewhere else. If it is, is there a botanical garden, a beautiful park, a beach or anywhere with a wonderful scenery near you? Or maybe some place that has a very special significance to you? First kiss, first date, etc.? I suggest proposing there after or before a nice dinner! I admit it's not exactly original, but it would still make a beautiful, memorable proposal!

I'm not exactly fond of the "being woken up and proposed to" idea. It's a moment I want to savour and appreciate, not feel groggy from sleep and go "Wha...?? Wuzzgoinon?" if you know what I mean...

Whatever you do, good luck and best wishes!

 

[walmartshopper]

I forgot to mention that she has no idea that I already have the ring. She currently thinks I''m in the process of looking at rings (because my internet history & cookies keep getting cleared). So the sooner I do it, the more surprised she will be.

After thinking about it, I''m wondering if I could convince her to go on some kind of day-trip with me other than disneyland, which is something that we used to do often but haven''t had time for lately. We used to go to the beach, the mountains, or the Getty museum, and we have some great memories from each trip. If she''s willing to go, I could take her to one of the beaches we went to when we first started dating and ask her there. But then again, she''s expecting me to ask her anytime and is encouraging me to do it soon, so that might be a little too obvious.

 

[KristyDarling]

Since the element of surprise seems to be your top priority, can you set up an evening out with friends at a restaurant, and then have your friends show up 30 minutes later than planned ("darn that L.A. traffic!"), move to a special pre-arranged private booth lit up with candles, and then ask her there? Your friends will show up 30 minutes-1 hour later and you can all celebrate together immediately. It''s a fairly classic proposal set-up, but it''s tried-and-true and she may not suspect anything if it''s just another routine night out with friends. When the evening is over, instead of heading home, you could further surprise her by taking her to a fancy hotel for a romantic stay overnight. She''ll be so touched by that thoughtful little "extra."

 

[anchor31]

Since day trips are something you''ve done before, it doesn''t seem so obvious to me. As a fellow lady who''s going to get proposed to soon, I should say that she probably, like me, will be suspicious whatever you do... So my advice is not to focus on the surprise point only and really try to make of P-day a romantic, special day with just the two of you. My 2c.

 

[walmartshopper]

Thanks guys, this is good stuff. I''m thinking now that I want to do both. I want to do the actual proposal at a time when we''re together but not doing anything out of the ordinary. That way it would be a complete surprise to her. But it wouldn''t end with the proposal. After the initial surprise and excitement, I could have a romantic evening already set up for us to celebrate and cherish the moment together. So instead of having a romantic evening leading up to a proposal, I would do a surprise proposal followed up by a romantic evening. It might be a slightly unusual way to doing it, but I think it would satisfy the element of surprise that she wants as well as the classic approach of a romantic and memorable evening together. Does this sound better?

 

[KristyDarling]

Absolutely! Like Anchor said, she''s probably going to suspect it''s coming no matter what you do, so the best way to incorporate some element of surprise is to get the proposal done quickly and up-front during a typical event that you normally do together (i.e. night out with friends, Sunday brunch, evening at the movies, etc.)...followed by an incredibly romantic evening to remember for always!

 

[pahoyafan]

My girl doesn''t know I have the ring either (I hope). We have been looking at rings for a while, so I needed a way for us to go away without out looking suspiscious. I simply told her a few months ago that I needed a weekend off from work (burned out), and that we haven''t really been away since August. I booked a cottage at our spot (Bed @ Breakfast). Tomorrow we go away, and I will propose. If you work alot of hours or you are a student, use the burned out method, and if she works too, she will relate and look foward to getting away also. Then, when that is figured out, find a nice way to surprise her. Since my girl may have thoughts about a proposal in the back of her head, I told her that I bought her a few small presents because we didn''t go out for Valentines day and I wanted to make it up to her. So now, when we go in, she will see presents on the bed, but i am going to tell her that we can''t open them until after dinner, etc. Now her mind will be on that while we are eating and I will choose my spot to propose during dinner or dessert. The gifts on the bed should throw her off and any proposal during dinner will come as a surprise since her mind will be on what are in the wrapped presents.

 

[anchor31]

Good plans, guys!! I really love your ideas! Good luck!

 

[moon river]

I love reading about guys putting effort into the proposal for a change. Way to go!!

 

[codex57]

Did it happen yet? If not, what about a day trip to Catalina Island? Horseback riding and proposing up in the mountains, or take a golf cart trip somewhere? Maybe do it on the ferry ride over as you''re pulling into port so the island is your backdrop?

 

[sydneycasandra]

What about scheduling the traditional dinner-scenic walk-etc. thing, and making sure she knows in advance about it all. "Oh I thought we''d go to dinner at the Blah Blah so make sure you wear something nice!" and perhaps send her for a manicure a couple days in advance. Make a big to-do about it like you''re such a dingdong that you can''t even plan a surprise proposal- she''ll think she knows exactly what''s coming. BUT, instead of proposing at the restaurant or afterwards like she will probably expect, what about proposing the day before when she''s least expecting it? Perhaps meet her for lunch in the park or go for a casual dinner and walk afterwards, whatever, something low key like you guys do all the time (make her dinner and put it in her dessert? I am already spoken for but I have to say finding a ring gently perched on top of a luscious chocolate dessert is my ALL TIME fantasy proposal- chocolate and diamonds!)

I digress. Basically, why don''t you plan something big and special but have her get a manicure in advance so when you DO propose the day before her hands will look nice for all those hand shots you''re gonna post!

Good luck!

 

[ladykemma]

i would wait until you''re all dressed up and ready to go somewhere and give her the ring at home privately. then go out and celebrate.

this will give her time to fix her messed up mascara. ha ha