PET PEEVE...........What do you think?

[ac719]

My SIL and I were talking about the ceremony (Baptist) during a wedding and I said that Ive always been told you marrying each other, not the minister so during the ceremony you should be looking at each other. She said that you should look at the minister since hes talking then only look at each other during your vows. I totally disagree lol
I understand some circumstances are different..... I was raised Catholic so I can see looking at the priest then....... But anyway........Whats your take?

 

[Mashira]

I'm not too sure how the religious practices play into all of this, so this is strictly my opinion:

I intend on holding hands, facing each other, and looking at the minister during the announcement part "we are gathered here today..."
after that bit, we will be looking at each other through the rest of the ceremony. To me, that acknowledges the minister, but makes the actual 'ceremony' between the two of us.

 

[ac719]

thanks Mashira lol thats my take on it too

 

[sillyberry]

I think it's totally a matter of culture and preference. I'm guessing we'll look at each other for most of the ceremony, but I don't think looking at the officiant is "wrong". I've definitely seen both ways at weddings and never thought twice about it (probably will now though!).

 

[Anonymous]

Facing each other, unless the priest is addressing you and asking you "do you take this man, etc."

I agree that the minister/priest/pastor is witnessing the marriage but you two are marrying each other. These are words directly from my Catholic priest.

 

[Sparklelu]

Just a thought... when we were married (back in the stone age) 1979, my husbands uncle a priest "married" us, he had a neat idea that
just before we were to exchange our vows, we turn and face the guests. He then stepped a bit to the side , kind of off the altar and everyone could see our faces as we exchanged our vows. Many people in our family really liked that. We still looked at each other, but everyone felt a part of the actual moment.

 

[turboflgrl]

Personally, I think there's far too many "rules" and people care way too much about how others perceive them. Personally, I find it very contrived to sort of "schedule" when to look at which person. Just do what feels natural.