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Personal space

Steel

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jul 8, 2006
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Ignoring for the moment your personal commitments or obligations to others, if you could be alone for as much time in a day/week as you would like, how much time would you choose?

Similarly how much time alone is too much?
 
Being a teacher, I do have the luxury of having a LOT of personal time. I do enjoy doing things at my own leisure, but I do crave interaction with others! I can spend the whole day alone, doing chores, exercising, etc... But probably one day is enough. By the next day I at least need to eat a meal with or visit friends and family. But it's nice to have the option to stay at home at just veg out if I want. :rodent:
 
I could go a week EASY by myself...and more...
 
I could definitely do a week. I notice that as I've gotten older, I enjoy periods of being by myself.
 
I can spend quite a bit of time alone. I've been unemployed for a while, so I do spend most days home alone (even if I go to the store, I'm still spending the majority of my day alone). After a while, it was kind of rough, but now I talk with people through email most days and it helps. I'm still alone, but at least I have people to talk to. Still, I could easily spend the better part of a week alone.

I tend to like alone time, but I count DH as part of my alone time. While I like to get away from other people, I don't generally feel the need to get away from him and be totally on my own. It's more strangers and co-workers that I need to decompress from.
 
I could also easily do a week. I cherish time spent by myself.
 
I could easily do a week (maybe longer) and could you please make it somewhere in the Caribbean?
 
another in the week or more category.

mz
 
I'd be content with a few hours to get some things done, but overall I'd miss my children and husband. If we're talking some alone-time with DH, I'd be thrilled to have a weekend with just the two of us. We actually got a sitter last night and went out to dinner, just the two of us, for the first time in years. Two hours for just the two of us was sooooo nice!
 
i could go a few days-- i'd miss my man :(.. and my puppies!
 
Not a whole lot - maybe an hour a day? I really prefer to be around people, and in general my mood lifts when I'm out with people. I'm a smiler, and when I'm around people, I'm smiling and somehow that makes it really hard to be in a bad mood for long. But if I'm alone, I'm in a funk and won't get out of it until I see people. I generally have some kind of noise on, too, if only to not feel "alone" and I talk to the pets so that I don't go insane being silent.
 
I'm an extreme introvert so I love being alone.

I once heard extroverts get their batteries charged by being with people, and drained by being alone while introverts get their batteries charged by being alone and drained by being with people.

The latter is very very true for me.

Oddly "socializing" by "being" with people on the forum does not drain me.
 
It would depend upon whether being alone means being with or without my dog.
 
Oddly "socializing" by "being" with people on the forum does not drain me.

Same here...as a matter of fact I think being here gives me most of the interaction I need...

I should note, like others mention, that I do count some of that alone time as in time with DH. Although when he goes away, and I miss him terribly, I still very much enjoy and cherish the time alone.
 
I require several hours of alone time a day to be at my best. Last week my husband was away from Mon. through Friday, both kids work and go to school. The result was I was much more productive around the house. I just find it easier to do all the chores when no one is in the way. I like silence too, so most of that time was spent without any background noise on in the house. Very calming for me and the dogs. I even bathed 2 of the dogs at the same time without any problems at all. It was a mini vacation for me kind of.
 
What about you, Steal? I'm curious.

I am guessing you could do loads of time by yourself, just based on other discussions "we've" had (on other posts, etc.)

ETA: I think we're all forgetting to answer your OTHER question - how much alone time is too much alone time...

I've felt lonely only one time in my life - and that was after months and months of very little interaction...but I had other things going on in my life at the time - so I am not sure that it was the time alone that led me to feel lonely - if that makes sense.

So although I don't have a guess as to how much is too much...I think once you crave seeing a particular person, then you could guess you've had enough time alone. I have only a handful of people I crave.

ETA 2: yes, like MZ and others have said...I need my kittie...I love to know he's there...him being around counts as alone time.
 
revised response: alone with my cats.

mz
 
I'd like a couple of evenings a week by myself. I work with others during the day and want that space in the evening. DH works alone during the day and wants to be around me in the evening.

If it were just me all day by myself I think after about 3-4 days I'd get a bit tired of being on my own.
 
I think a day alone a week (where I did what I wanted) would be about right. Of course, I could do more; but I think I get "punchy" if I can't get a day a week for myself (or 2 halfdays).

Yesterday I never even signed on the internet or checked email - it was a "personal day" for me to recover.

Perry
 
I'm not sure how much time I like to spend alone, but I can say that I prefer to be with others in general. I don't work in the summer, and I'm always a bit lonelier now than I am during the rest of the year. Some of my friends don't work either in the summer, but a lot do. I'm always looking for something to do, preferably in the company of friends or family.

eta: Princesss -- I totally know what you mean about being in a funk when you're alone. I don't mind a little time alone, but if it's too much time, I feel that way too.
 
I also need to have the tv on usually, even if it's only for background noise. It makes me feel less alone. So Princesss, I hear ya on that one too. :))
 
CJ2008 said:
What about you, Steal? I'm curious.

I am guessing you could do loads of time by yourself, just based on other discussions "we've" had (on other posts, etc.)

ETA: I think we're all forgetting to answer your OTHER question - how much alone time is too much alone time...

I've felt lonely only one time in my life - and that was after months and months of very little interaction...but I had other things going on in my life at the time - so I am not sure that it was the time alone that led me to feel lonely - if that makes sense.

So although I don't have a guess as to how much is too much...I think once you crave seeing a particular person, then you could guess you've had enough time alone. I have only a handful of people I crave.

ETA 2: yes, like MZ and others have said...I need my kittie...I love to know he's there...him being around counts as alone time.

Alone time for the purposes of this survey did/does include pets ;))

CJ: You guessed right! I am a classic introvert and am drained by people. I need time alone. But I need very little time away from my husband. I classify alone time as time with him & the pets! Regrettably DH has a job that takes him away for more than 1/4 of the year including nights. So I'm alone quite often and very usually on special occasions; birthdays & holidays. Consequently I'm alone from him more than I would ever like. He is gone at the moment - hence I have so much time to post on PS! I miss him...

So to answer my own question: I need at least 1 hr a day on my own, but there isn't an amount of time that is too long to be on my own.
 
I need more now than I used to. People do drain me, and I like peace and quiet. But take my doggies away for a week?? That would be super hard on me..
 
I forgot to add that during the school year, the weekdays work really well. I usually have maybe 2 hours by myself before my husband gets home from work. I spend that time doing errands, cleaning the house, making dinner, and/or just vegging out on the couch.
 
Kaleigh said:
I need more now than I used to. People do drain me, and I like peace and quiet. But take my doggies away for a week?? That would be super hard on me..

Nobody is taking the pooches/moggies etc.

Alone time from the human-type people is what I mean :cheeky: .

Besides who would take our pets when we had all this alone time; I am the only person crazy enough to put up with my pets' crap. Right now the cats are playing 'I can get there first' oh my goodness it drives me crazy. I want to say - you don't even know where I am going you crazy cat, besides it DOES NOT count if you trip me up to get there 'first'. I fake them out sometimes and pretend I'm going into a room then walk past. Ha ha moggie, gotcha! Anyway, I digress...
 
It REALLY depends on my mood. When I'm feeling social, sleeping is sufficient down time for me. When I'm feeling anti-social, I could go a couple of days without leaving the apartment and be fine with it. In general, I think an hour or two a day, consistently, is good for me. I much prefer being around people face-to-face than talking on the phone, though. Even the thought of a long phone conversation drains me.

I was a bridesmaid in a wedding this weekend and had out-of-town guests staying with me from Wednesday until about 20 minutes ago, and have been around people almost nonstop for the past 36 hours, so I'm ready for some serious alone time right now.
 
Wow Ocatavia, that sounds exhausting! I need my alone time, or at least I thought I did, my dh was laid off of work for some time and it seemed like he was always there, I had no alone time and I did not like it, now he has been back at work and the house seems very quiet , I think I had gotten used to him being home all the time. I guess I am hard to please. :rolleyes:
 
Decogirl said:
Wow Ocatavia, that sounds exhausting! I need my alone time, or at least I thought I did, my dh was laid off of work for some time and it seemed like he was always there, I had no alone time and I did not like it, now he has been back at work and the house seems very quiet , I think I had gotten used to him being home all the time. I guess I am hard to please. :rolleyes:

Ha! I know what you mean. My husband had been laid off from a former job over a year ago, and he was out of work for 6 months. I was SO used to my routine : come home from work, do errands, clean the house, whatever, and I definitely felt like he had disrupted my routine. He was ALWAYS there and it drove me crazy. I even suggested a few times that he go places, but then he'd follow up my suggestion with "okay, great! We'll go together!" Uh no, that's not what I wanted. :rolleyes: :bigsmile:
 
kenny said:
I'm an extreme introvert so I love being alone.

I once heard extroverts get their batteries charged by being with people, and drained by being alone while introverts get their batteries charged by being alone and drained by being with people.

The latter is very very true for me.

Oddly "socializing" by "being" with people on the forum does not drain me.

I like the juxtaposition of our posts, Kenny, because I'm an extrovert and truly do feel my best and happiest when I'm around other people. In fact, I had to take a personality test for work and they told me that the easiest way to keep myself happy was to be around people and socialize. I need people around - when BF and I used to play anywhere but here (You know, "If you could be anywhere else right now, where would you be?") he would get concerned because I'd say that to be alone I'd like to go to some city where I don't know the language and sit in a cafe. I'd still have people around, but conversation would be minimal. Apparently that doesn't count as "alone time" to him.
 
Ideally, I would best prefer to have 1-2 hours alone everyday, provided it's in my own home. I do love when my husband goes away on short trips as well.

I don't think I'd like to be all by myself for more than 2-3 days at a time. I do love interacting with people, and miss being around my close friends and family.
 
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