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One big ring....or two smaller ones?

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Meowtown2

Meowtown2

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jul 23, 2008
Messages
62
Okay, my FI popped the question back in March and said that he wanted me to pick out my dream ring. I''ve spent the past 5-6 months doing a lot of research on diamonds and sapphires and have finally come up with two options that I think would be perfect! The problem is that now I just cannot decide between the two! I brought this up to the FI and he said quite casually, ''well, why don''t you scale back the center stones and get two rings instead of the one!'' What an amazing idea! (I can''t believe I didn''t think of that myself!). However, now I have a new decision to make, one ring or two? Two rings would be super, but should a gal only have that 1 special ering? I just don''t know anymore! Anyway, I am totally torn and would love to hear what the very informative and very kind PSers have to say on the matter! Here are the options:

OPTION 1:

1. If I chose to get only a diamond Ering, it would be an antique cushion, I''ve been drooling over this one in particular:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-F_S8G_Kj0A
In this LM solitaire setting:
http://www.artofplatinum.com/4images/details.php?image_id=315

2. If I only got one sapphire ring, I would love something like this stone:
http://www.thenaturalsapphirecompany.com/Sapphires/Blue/Cushion/stoneid=B2242
In this setting:
http://www.artofplatinum.com/4images/details.php?image_id=436

OPTION 2: The best of both worlds?

1. I''d probably spend slightly more on the diamond than the sapphire just so I could keep it around 1.5 carats, but since it''s antique I''d think about going with an even lower color. I suppose it all depends on what''s available. Also, I''d stick with the same setting.

2. The sapphire would go down to 1.5 carats, which is plenty big enough for me, same color, clarity, and I''d see if Leon could make the setting in WG.

Okay, I''d love to hear any opinions on this. I should mention that without my hours (and hours...and hours...) of lurking on PS, I could never have found such great options to begin with. Thanks for your help!!
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I forgot to mention that my budget would stay the same ( I think that might have been obvious?!?)...
 
I think you should do what''s right for you! I''ll tell you my story as I kind of have two rings too. So my FI proposed with a beautiful cushion (diamond) ering last April. In January, my ring had a run in with a garbage disposal and had to be sent away for a few months to be reset into something different. So in the meantime I saw a GORGEOUS asscher cut sapphire (by Jeff White who is a fabulous colored stone cutter BTW) that I wanted, so hubby and I bought it and had it set into a ring. I now wear both rings on my engagement finger interchangeably whenever I feel like it.

I *personally* think it''s fun, and my DH does not care one whip, but others will think that the sentimentality isn''t as strong. I say do what you want.
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Also, something to remember is that a sapphire of 1.5 carats will look considerably smaller than a diamond that is 1.5 carats because of the density of the stone. So if you want both rings to have the same look/size, you''ll want to focus on the millimeter measurements of the stone rather than the carat weight.
 
i dont like the idea of getting two rings.. seems to me kinda (for the lack of a better word) greedy?

just imho... if you can live with the smaller ring why waste money and get another ring simply cause its still within the budget? id take that money saved and i dunno... put it in my kids college fund, our retirement fund, put it towards a downpayment on a house, or put it in a high yield CD/savings account and use it towards an upgrade years later. (i perticularly like the upgrade idea)

but thats just my $0.02
 
Wow, I wasn''t expecting to be called ''greedy''-- I feel pretty bad. I''m genuinely sorry if that''s how the post came across. I''m new to PS and just really excited about getting my ring(s). I just want to note that this money was saved especially for my ering and was not to the detriment of a home or retirement.

I just thought that two rings would be fun, like you said, Neatfreak (and thanks for the tip about sapphire cuts, by the way!). Also, I''m really hard on my jewelry, and I figured that two rings might mean they would stay in better condition.
 
i dont think its greediness --its more that it seems to be about the rings and not the purpose of why you are getting a ring in the first place. why dont you focus on one ring that will be your engagement ring and then in a few years get another ring for say the birth of a child or anniversary.
 
Sorry, but I don't see how it is greedy if the budget is staying the same for one as for two, and her Fi was the one who suggested it
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Meowtown, there is no need to defend yours' and your Fi's financial decisions. I say, go with two if its what will make you happy, and as long as your Fi is cool with it too (as Neat mentioned some may view it as not as sentimental,).
You could have one for dressy and one for casual, seeing as you mentioned you are hard on your stuff..
The only thing I would ask is, do you think you are a "size girl"? As in, will you end up feeling like you should have gotten a bigger diamond? If not, then go for it!

Many women on PS have multiple w-bands and eternity rings, which I think is a fun way to change up your set.

Let us know how you go!
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Since you seem to want to spend a certain amount on this occasion I would just focus on getting the best diamond possible for that budget so that there isnt any "leftover".

Otherwise, get the sapphire and wait until a bday or xmas to give that to her if you are just in the "ring buying" mood. Its easy to get caught up in wanting to buy a lot once you have all this info and have seen so many stones and different type of jewelry.

Its not greedy at all and I think thats why she said "for lack of a better word".
 
Date: 8/21/2008 8:42:59 AM
Author: Meowtown2
Wow, I wasn''t expecting to be called ''greedy''-- I feel pretty bad. I''m genuinely sorry if that''s how the post came across. I''m new to PS and just really excited about getting my ring(s). I just want to note that this money was saved especially for my ering and was not to the detriment of a home or retirement.

I just thought that two rings would be fun, like you said, Neatfreak (and thanks for the tip about sapphire cuts, by the way!). Also, I''m really hard on my jewelry, and I figured that two rings might mean they would stay in better condition.
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I''m sorry Meowtown2. Greedy was a poor choice of words. What I really meant was that to me the money spent on the extra ring could be better spent/saved on something else. I didnt mean to make you feel bad!
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I understand that the money is not to the detriment of a home or retirement but reallocating it towards bigger financial goals/needs seems more beneficial in the long run than getting two e-rings.
 
Date: 8/21/2008 9:14:06 AM
Author: stone_seeker
Since you seem to want to spend a certain amount on this occasion I would just focus on getting the best diamond possible for that budget so that there isnt any ''leftover''.

Otherwise, get the sapphire and wait until a bday or xmas to give that to her if you are just in the ''ring buying'' mood. Its easy to get caught up in wanting to buy a lot once you have all this info and have seen so many stones and different type of jewelry.

Its not greedy at all and I think thats why she said ''for lack of a better word''.
Click to expand...
I''m a he
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Date: 8/21/2008 9:00:06 AM
Author: arjunajane
Sorry, but I don''t see how it is greedy if the budget is staying the same for one as for two, and her Fi was the one who suggested it
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Meowtown, there is no need to defend yours'' and your Fi''s financial decisions. I say, go with two if its what will make you happy, and as long as your Fi is cool with it too (as Neat mentioned some may view it as not as sentimental,).
You could have one for dressy and one for casual, seeing as you mentioned you are hard on your stuff..
The only thing I would ask is, do you think you are a ''size girl''? As in, will you end up feeling like you should have gotten a bigger diamond? If not, then go for it!

Many women on PS have multiple w-bands and eternity rings, which I think is a fun way to change up your set.

Let us know how you go!
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Click to expand...
getting mutliple w-bands and eternity rings is different than getting multiple e-rings imo. i see no problem with multiple w-bands or eternity rings.
 
If we're talking about not spending the extra money and putting it towards savings or whatnot, I don't see what's the difference between buying 2 e-rings vs. buying multiple bands/RHR/etc?
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You can save that money too, or better yet, why spend so much money on an e-ring that you can save for something else?

E-ring, or any other jewelery for that matter, is a luxury. I don't see the point of saying people shouldn't spend money on 2 rings when some of us have 1 ring that costs 2-3 (or more!) times as others. You wouldn't tell them they should've saved that money towards something else would you?

Back to the topic, I think you should give it a careful thought and think about what you want out of the ring(s), and do not make hasty decision. If both you and your FI are ok with getting 2, then by all means, why not? Also think about the possiblity of getting the diamond ring now, and get another somewhere down the road (anniversary, birthday, etc), then you can save up and get both rings exactly as you would want them.

I personally ended up with 2 rings, although not initially planned that way. I got my e-ring (diamond) which had to be sent back to be fixed, and my FI (sweet as he is) got me a beatiful garnet ring which I wore as an e-ring until I got my original ring back. Now I wear it on my right hand and I have 2 beautiful rings and both mean so much to me. So do what works for you but make sure you REALLY want to do this.
 
Being the sentimental person that I am, I''d think that two e-rings wouldn''t be as special. I''d rather have one that was more special than two just because they''re pretty. Pick one, stick with your decision and don''t look back. Save the other idea for something special. I think this was said earlier.
 
I haven''t read the other answers yet but I know I would get two smaller rings. I love the idea of being able to change them with my mood. Maybe it''s a gemini thing.
 
P.S. I just read some of the other posts. Your not being greedy. Thats just silly since most people here own multiple pieces of jewelry or at least are hoping to.
 
Date: 8/21/2008 9:21:26 AM
Author: HariSeldon

Date: 8/21/2008 9:14:06 AM
Author: stone_seeker
Since you seem to want to spend a certain amount on this occasion I would just focus on getting the best diamond possible for that budget so that there isnt any ''leftover''.

Otherwise, get the sapphire and wait until a bday or xmas to give that to her if you are just in the ''ring buying'' mood. Its easy to get caught up in wanting to buy a lot once you have all this info and have seen so many stones and different type of jewelry.

Its not greedy at all and I think thats why she said ''for lack of a better word''.
Click to expand...
I''m a he
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Click to expand...
Sorry..as am I and people always assume the opposite
 
I had the same problem as you in deciding my engagement ring, and I think the way to go is to get the more "classic" style - the diamond cushion - and then you can get the sapphire ring as an anniversary gift a year or two down the line. My husband always jokes that he has no problem picking out gifts, because anytime I see another ring that I like, I''ll tell him, "5th anniversary, honey" ;)
 
I think to each their own. What works for one might not work for another. Some countries don''t even have engagement rings. Does that mean the feeling behind getting engaged is less?

IMHO it''s just a material item. The relationship is what matters. The presence of none, one, two or three e-rings will make not one whit of difference to the quality and longevity of the marriage.

Soooo do what you and your fiance want to. Be happy. Life is short and you can''t take it with you, so really what does it matter? Your life together, the love you have and build and the legacy of that love to others around you and possibly your children are what matter. Sorry got a bit carried away here. I just get a little tired of judgementalism. Every diamond is purely a luxury.
 
1. If I chose to get only a diamond Ering, it would be an antique cushion, I''ve been drooling over this one in particular:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-F_S8G_Kj0A
In this LM solitaire setting:
http://www.artofplatinum.com/4images/details.php?image_id=315
Click to expand...
Without knowing any of the specs, this diamond looks spectacular!!! If it were my choice, I would go for this beautiful cushion and forego the sapphire.

But if you''re hard on your rings, it may be too much for daily wear. Maybe you could get a wedding band that you would be happy to wear on its own to avoid banging up the engt ring? And get a sapphire ring sometime in the future to swap out with the engt ring?

But only you know what''s best. Nothing wrong with going with 2 rings if they''re in budget, but I think the antique cushion here is too breathtaking to pass up!
 
I vote for the first diamond, with the second setting and replace the side diamonds with sapphires!!! Then get a sapphire right hand ring later.
 
Well I think that you have just fabulous taste in rings! Congrats on your proposal also that is so thoughtful that he wants to get you your dream ring! And what a fun choice to be faced with! I think that it is awesome that you have done so much research too.

The choice between a diamond and sapphire is so hard since they both have their own unique looks, properties and symbolism. If you really would prefer two smaller rings and that is really very you then I think that is just fine.

I was not able to get the sapphire link to come up but I am quite partial to antique cushions myself. I mean the history of an old stone how exciting is that!

If I were you I would go with the antique diamond because antique cushions rock! But that''s just me. If you are looking for some color there are ways that you could add it like what about a sapphire wedding band?

I agree with other what other people have suggested about stacking bands. I have really been admiring the look of french cut wedding bands lately. Anyways what about the antique cushion diamond paired with a sapphire band? You could sometimes even just wear the band. I have seen some gorgeous sapphire bands on PS.

Bands can be so versatile I mean think of the bands Jennifer Garner and Kate Beckinsale. That would be a great way to have some color.

You mentioned that you are hard on your jewelry so the relative hardness of a diamond compared to the hardness of a sapphire could be an important factor. Or maybe the smaller rings would feel better on your hand if you are very active. Also consider a setting where the stones are very protected.

I can''t wait to see which you get of all your great options I bet it will be beautiful.
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And lastly welcome to PS
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Mrs.2Artists
 
Get both!! Get both!!! Get both!!!!!!! And then come and show us!!
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Date: 8/21/2008 7:56:28 AM
Author: HariSeldon
i dont like the idea of getting two rings.. seems to me kinda (for the lack of a better word) greedy?


just imho... if you can live with the smaller ring why waste money and get another ring simply cause its still within the budget? id take that money saved and i dunno... put it in my kids college fund, our retirement fund, put it towards a downpayment on a house, or put it in a high yield CD/savings account and use it towards an upgrade years later. (i perticularly like the upgrade idea)


but thats just my $0.02
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I have a bunch of different wedding sets...including a solitaire/wedding band and a 3 stone/5 stone combination that I wear together (avatar). I like being able to mix things up and variety is fun! Nothing wrong with that. I also have a couple of diamond RHRs...I don''t see it as greedy...I just love diamonds!
 
I just arrived home to all these wonderful posts. Thanks everyone for the great ideas!
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I have to say that I am partial to antique cushions too (something I knew noting about before discovering the wonderful world of PS), and that one in Erica & Grace''s arsenal is outstanding. The specs are K, VS, 2.44 carats, and I LOVE IT! I have been hunting around for antique stones (mainly cushions and OMCs), and am constantly amazed by the beautiful colors that come out of the warmer-colored stones. Seriously beautiful stuff.

The FI and I are not the most sentimental of folks, and view the ering as something that''s both great fun and meaningful. (Not to mention the fact that I''ve had such a great time shopping and learning!) We''re also just really excited about getting married! With that said, I still love the idea of having the two smaller rings to change with my mood. HOwever, I think that the cushion just might be too good to pass up, especially since asudesigner has suggested the cushion in the second setting with side sapphires instead of diamonds! I absolutely love it and never thought of it!!! Fab idea. Then maybe a sapphire wedding band like 2Artists said? I think I''m liking the sound of that!!

Now I just have to convince the FI that I will ''need'' a sapphire RHR in the very near future. . . hmmm, any suggestions on how I should bring that one up?
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Thanks for all the great comments and when it comes time to make the purchase, I''ll be sure to keep everyone informed. I''m loving PS and am planning to stick around! How did I ever get along without it?
 
Yay! You liked my idea!!! You get super quick photoshop!!! (I gotta go home and cook dinner or it would be a little nicer!)

blue sapp jrn.jpg
 
I LOVED your idea. Honestly, I think you just designed my ering! FI LOVES it too, so I think we have a winner. Thanks for the photoshop, by the way! I have no idea how to use it or I would create a matching micropave w-band with alternating diamonds and sapphires like this one, perhaps?:

http://www.artofplatinum.com/4images/details.php?image_id=336

Buon appetito!
 
I very quickly found an image of two blue sapphires on the internet and pasted them in different rotations and sizes over the existing diamonds. I should have changed the color of the diamonds to blue. Then the highlights would be in the right places and it would blend much better. And the blue would be the right shade, the current color is too bright for that lighting.

I''m very excited to see the final product!!! Good luck!!!
 
Since old diamonds are so unique, I would go for the diamond as your engagement ring, then get a sapphire down the road, for an anniversary or some other milestone, and wear it on your right hand. I actually like the second setting you posted, the one with the engraving, for an OEC. I think that would look stunning especially with a matching wedding band!
 
Date: 8/21/2008 8:00:25 PM
Author: asudesigner
Yay! You liked my idea!!! You get super quick photoshop!!! (I gotta go home and cook dinner or it would be a little nicer!)
Click to expand...
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I think this is an awesome idea!
The best or both worlds for meowtown
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I'm all for having two rings! I have an engagement ring(solitaire), and I also have a 3 stone anniversary ring. Hubby got it for our 2 month anniversary--so the timing was fairly close to when we were first engaged. I only wear rings on my wedding ring finger, so I alternate. I love it! For me, the sentimentality is in wearing a
ring on that finger--not which ring specifically.

Do what you feel is best. There are no rules when it comes to engagement rings!
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I love both of your ideas!
 
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