not really a rant...

[jcarlylew]

but has anyone said anything to you about your wedding, or being in your wedding that was off color, or off the wall?

my sister (who earlier assumed my wedding was in 1 month...wtg sis) said "please DO NOT tell me you want me as your MOH. i don''t want the hassle"
errmm.. well gee sis, NOT ANYMORE

. okay, well she was never going to be (but i was going to have her as a bridesmaid), but seriously. i know she''s still sore from her divorce (which, in all cases, was her idea AND an ambical split) and hates the fact that my mom is bugging her to patch things up, but STILL.

so, who else has said something off color, and though its no biggie in the long run, still a sore spot?


*end rant*

 

[Iowa Lizzy]

Aw JCar, that sucks! Someday she may look back and realize she should have worded that a little differently. Sometimes people make things all about themselves without thinking. I think we all do it from time to time. At the same time, you wouldn''t want her to "half-ass" her way through MOH duties. Maybe she did you a favor. Now you don''t have to tell her she won''t be the MOH since she wasn''t going to anyway?

Anyway, I''ve got one too! It''s not really "off color" by it''s something that bugged me nonetheless.

I just went gown shopping and I called my mother to tell her I''d emailed her some of the better pics. I also told her I really loved all the dresses and any of them could be "it." So about an hour after I email her she called and just said "I don''t really like ANY of them." I said "that''s good. YOU don''t have to wear any of them."

She''s just mad that I didn''t invite her to go shopping with me. She''s just such a momzilla. Seriously, I can just barely walk out of a fitting room and say "Ooh I really love this one!" And she''ll just say "Nope. Doesn''t do ANYTHING for you. Next." Ugh. This is going to be a long 9 1/2 months...... Did mine just turn into a rant?!? Sorry!

 

[jcarlylew]

lol thats okay! thats what the thread is for!

i know she doesnt want the "hassle" of planning anything

. fortunately my best friend is my MOH so i am covered there!

and your mum? i know the feeling!!

keep em coming!

 

[ozsparkle]

I hear you JCar. It''s like everyone all of a sudden losses their manners and forgets our feelings. My sisters have been similarly insensitive. I asked my eldest sister to be a BM and she laughed for about 2 minutes hysterically at the idea... neeedless to say I''m having friends instead.

In my experience the worst one of all has been my Dad''s wife... We normally get along really well, but since our wedding plans started she has had an opinion on everything!!! One in particular I love was when shen said my hair trial looked like ''a birds nest''!!!! Also that not doing things her way was ''a mistake''. What I''d like to know is who says there is a rule book with weddings... AGGGH!



End rant/vent.

 

[cocolaw]

oh yeah, people don''t realize how rude they are being when it comes to wedding stuff!! my fmil told me 2 weeks ago that she used to try to get my fiance to wear a ring but that "he doesn''t wear a ring" and that it is so "weird" that we are opening a joint checking account.

people don''t think!

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

I guess some people just don''t think about how their comments can hurt people.

Both my mum and my sister have given me cringe worthy comments and they don''t even know that the wedding is happening yet!

We were toying with the idea of a suprise wedding and after telling my mother and swearing her to secrecy to not tell anyone about it my sister rings me a day later and exclaims '' oh you''re not going to have a suprise wedding are you??'' (like i am going to say yes now).

I took my mum to look at dresses once because i was feeling guilty about not including her (''oh, but i went everywhere with your sister'') and every dress i tried on she said..
''yeah it''s beautiful but it would be a waste on you''
''it''s lovely but you''re getting married in your back yard''
'' but don''t you want to have a real wedding??''

Hence neither my mum nor my sister know that the wedding is happening in less than 6 months.

 

[charbie]

oh- you mean like the time i had this conversation with my sister/moh:
me: "i can''t wait for the wedding! oct. 3rd is going to be the best day of my life!"
sister: "i can''t wait for oct. 4th. that''s gonna be the best day of my life!"

or

me: "i''m getting my marriage license today! best $50 we''ve spent on ourselves, ever!"
sister: "i''ll pay the $50 if you just elope."

at first it was funny, but really struck a chord with me. if i said those comments to her...i''d be shot.

 

[absolut_blonde]

I was talking to one of my bridesmaids:

Me: ''If DF wasn''t set on wearing a tan suit, I would probably just put all of the girls in black dresses and be done with it, that would be much easier!''
Her: ''Oh no, don''t do that! Everybody does black dresses now!''

In my head I was like what?! Whose wedding is this, anyway? Shut up! And I mean, ''everyone'' does tons of things when it comes to weddings. Most brides wear a white dress too! Most people get married, so it''s hard to be totally original here. And if I did black dresses, it would have been to their benefit since we probably could''ve found something much more affordable.

Of course, I just changed the subject and didn''t really respond to it.

But honestly, because of that alone, I doubt I will take her along with me when I shop for my gown OR the girls dresses. I don''t need that! She''s a long-time friend but she can be a pain in the arse.

 

[ts44]

Date: 9/24/2009 10:07:33 AM
Author: hawaiianorangetree
I guess some people just don''t think about how their comments can hurt people.

Both my mum and my sister have given me cringe worthy comments and they don''t even know that the wedding is happening yet!

We were toying with the idea of a suprise wedding and after telling my mother and swearing her to secrecy to not tell anyone about it my sister rings me a day later and exclaims '' oh you''re not going to have a suprise wedding are you??'' (like i am going to say yes now).

I took my mum to look at dresses once because i was feeling guilty about not including her (''oh, but i went everywhere with your sister'') and every dress i tried on she said..
''yeah it''s beautiful but it would be a waste on you''
''it''s lovely but you''re getting married in your back yard''
'' but don''t you want to have a real wedding??''

Hence neither my mum nor my sister know that the wedding is happening in less than 6 months.

JEEZ.

That''s rough. I thought I was going to scream when my mom was doing what Travel Goddess''s was doing.

 

[Rock_of_Love]

When I told FMIL about our wedding plans and where we are getting married (Puerto Vallarta)...she looked at me with these "guilt-trip-intended" eyes and said, "Now, you knnnooooww that a lot of our family won''t be able to make it because of where you are having it. I hope you are okay with that."

Thanks.

 

[ts44]

I just thought of something else -

One of my bridesmaids has very definite ideas about what looks good on her body. I''ve been trying to accommodate all my bridesmaids as far as dress, colors, shoes, jewelry, etc, so I''ve been sending them little email updates, and the exchanges go like this:

Me: "So what do you girls think of this dress?"
Her: "That color will make me look naked."

Me: "How about this color?"
Her: "That makes me look like a corpse."

Me: "I''ve decided I''ll be buying your jewelry in addition to your dresses, I was thinking peachy pink gold jewelry."
Her: "Peach makes me look ill."

SERIOUSLY? One little peach accent on a necklace will make her look ill. I get that nobody wants to wear something they think is ugly but it gets to be a point where she really needs to give it a rest, I''m trying my best! Plus, I''m BUYING it. I don''t think she''s doing it on purpose to upset me but she needs to choose her phrasing better.

 

[Nov2109]

people just say some really stupid things...we''ve been engaged for almost a year, and the wedding is still another 8 months away...so ive heard plenty...here are a few examples:

MOH: your ring is really you...but when I get one my diamond better be bigger, yours isnt big enough.

MOH''s mother: your diamond is too small for my taste (coming from the woman who has been divorced three times

)

Me: I am making the appointments for the wedding day at my salon...my mom is ordering breakfast etc-it should be really fun, im so excited.
Bridesmaid: I know you want us to get our hair done together since your mom is having breakfast delivered to the salon etc, can I have mine done separately and I''ll meet you there after im done? I don''t really like your salon... (this is the only thing Ive asked them to do is to get their hair done together...they can have whatever style they want id just like us to all get ready together.)

Me: Can you give me a saturday you are free over the next few weeks? Id like to do the bridesmaid flip flops before the first fitting next month.
MOH: Your wedding isnt until next year, we have time, why do we have to do them now?
Me: because its my wedding and im excited. if youre too busy to come or dont want to thats fine. *She never came, she said she was too busy**

Me: I''m really excited to register, its going to be fun picking stuff out for our place.
Bridesmaid: i thought only pregnant ladies had showers.
Me: no, you have a bridal shower too....the bridesmaids are supposed to throw it for the bride.
Bridesmaid: so when do you get checks?
Me: well, the women go to the shower and give you shower gifts, then usually you get a wedding gift as well, which can also be off the registry, but in our area is most common to give a monetary gift. (why am i explaining this to a 25 year old? scary)

Me: Since you live the farthest away, what is a good day you can come down for the first fitting. Id like for all the girls to be there together, i think it would be really nice, plus im going to take everyone out to eat.
Bridesmaid: I can come down two wednesdays from now.
Me: great, ill make the appointment
Bridesmaid: two days prior to the appointment-I cant justify taking time off from work to try a dress on for a wedding that is next year. (she would have to leave work 30 minutes early, i made a 7pm appointment for her)
Me: oh great, thanks. (thinking to myself, and you wonder why i didnt ask you to be my MOH-she gave me the silent treatment when she found out she was a BM and not the MOH)

thats just a sample. These girls have been my best friends since we were toddlers. and they are really not being good friends right now. They are making this wedding about them and what they want. All ive asked them to do is wear a dress, and get their hair done and show up to the fittings, because im tired of being dissapointed that they never offer to help, or want to help with anything.They can wear whatever jewlery they want, shoes etc. Just be with me on my wedding day....I actually had to ask one of them if they were really going to show up to my wedding(the one who couldnt justify trying on her dress, which by the way her measurements werent taken at our dress shop-she was too busy to come down for that too)

sorry for the rant, these girls just make me feel like crap sometimes!

 

[jcarlylew]

oh my! i think i''ll just count my blessings from my sisters tacky comment then!

thank god for PS, right ladies?

 

[lliang_chi]

My mom is telling everyone in my family, including my brother and twin sister, what to give me for a wedding present. Jewelry in case anyone''s wondering. But I don''t WEAR jewelry...

I told my brother to give James an xBox. And my sister is going to get whatever. If my mom asks me, I''m going to tell her they gave me a puppy.