Nitty gritty stuff

[sunnyd]

I have a momzilla on my hands...this is half question half vent. So look out.

What are you doing the day of the wedding? How are you getting people where?

I''m trying to figure out the logistics of getting all the BMs together so we can go do our hair then go to the venue (hotel) to hang out, get lunch, do girly stuff. Obviously I want to be with my girls, but my mom is trying to get me to get my hair done at the hotel by someone and ride with my family in the limo they''re getting to go over to the hotel. So send my BMs off by themselves? Um, no.

My mom is just being frustrating!! She''s feeling left out of everything but she''s excluding herself. Like the hair. My FMIL and her mom (FI''s g-ma) are going with us, but she doesn''t want to go. So she''s trying to pull me out of everything.

I may have just answered my own question...if we go get our hair done then come back and all ride together in the limo to the hotel...hmmm. Now if you were a cranky MOB feeling left out, would this be acceptable?

I''m so sick of this garbage. Is it November yet?

 

[Smurfysmiles]

I think you did answer your own question. I would firmly but nicely tell her "I will be getting my hair done with the girls and getting lunch, etc. FMIL and FGMIL will be there as well and of course that means you can come as well too. Maybe you could even have them do something special for your hair? If you do not want to come with, that is fine as well; however, this is what I will be doing on the day of MY wedding."

And btw, I''m so ready for it to be november as well I banned wedding talk this entire weekend aside from fi and I purchasing our wedding gift to each other (we each bought half of a wii). We spent the whole weekend playing it lol

 

[marlie]

i hear ya on the mom issue. my mom keeps making it about me and her and i have to keep reminding her that there is a bridal party to think of too! not everything can be a mother-daughter exclusive event.

my advice would be to get your hair done where you want and run the wedding day activities as you wanted with whomever you want BUT carve out an hour or whatever for you and your mom to do something special. maybe you two can get manis/pedis together the day before or something...

 

[vc10um]

Date: 9/21/2009 11:20:42 AM
Author: marlie
i hear ya on the mom issue. my mom keeps making it about me and her and i have to keep reminding her that there is a bridal party to think of too! not everything can be a mother-daughter exclusive event.

my advice would be to get your hair done where you want and run the wedding day activities as you wanted with whomever you want BUT carve out an hour or whatever for you and your mom to do something special. maybe you two can get manis/pedis together the day before or something...

That''s an awesome idea, Marlie.

 

[jcarlylew]

i havent had time to read through the responses yet (sorry!!)

anyway you could have breakfast with just your mom?

i see my mom doing the same things you are mentioning, and sometimes the easiest fix is alone time.

 

[sunnyd]

Good ideas ladies, thanks.

Marlie, I love that idea, but I was going to do a pedi as part of my BM gift. Maybe after hair, get in limo with girls and moms, go get nails done, lunch? I don''t freakin know. My parents wanted a limo to get my family downtown, so they might not even want anyone on it.

Jcar, breakfast would be good. Our hair is getting done at 8, but a nice brekky at home (I''m staying with my parents the night before) might work...

And I hope for you your mom isn''t like mine. I''ve had no stress except from her.

 

[elrohwen]

Answer to the first question - here's what we're doing:
Everyone's coming over to my house in the morning (guys and dates included) then the girls are going to get hair done (about 10 min away from my house). The boys will get us lunch while we're gone, then we'll all eat. After lunch we'll all head over to the venue together and do pictures (at the venue and at a nearby town). I assume the dates will come along even if they're not in the pictures. So we'll pretty much all be together all day. FI's groomsmen are two of my best friends too (and his sister is a bridesmaid) so we want to all hang out as a big happy group all day. (ETA: 2 girls, 2 guys, plus dates; so not a huge group)

And for your second question, I really don't know what to do about your mom

It does sound like she's trying to spend a lot of one on one time with you and not understanding that you want to spend time with your BMs too. I like the idea of you all riding together in the limo. Hopefully she'll go for that!

ETA: My parents are coming up on Wednesday (for a Friday wedding) so we'll have some one on one time. I'm not sure if your mom lives nearby or could come out earlier, but maybe if you guys have some mom and daughter wedding time that'll help her feel better? I think my mom is really glad she can spend Wednesday night and all day Thursday with me.

 

[Morgie44]

I''m not sure if this will work for you, but I had a hair and makeup artist come to US. We rented a suite for the night before the wedding and the night of the wedding. Anybody who wanted to stay over was welcome to the night before the wedding. Everyone else came the morning of. We had our coordinator drop off lunch for everyone. (Moms were included in all of this) It was really nice to have everyone together to relax and get ready before things got crazy. When it came time for me to get in my dress, I snuck off to one of the bedrooms with just my mom and the photographer so that we could have a quiet minute together before everything started. Then everyone went from there in the limo to the church.

 

[sunnyd]

Elrohwen, that sounds like a fun day! She lives very close by, so I''ll have to figure something out that we can do together. Blah...

That would have been ideal Morgie!

I wish we could, but the girl won''t come to us. And she''s so affordable and talented the plan is just to go there.