Wedding Newly marrieds - got advice?

[Independent Gal]

What did you learn from your wedding that you can pass along? What was not as you expected? What do you wish you had done differently?

 

[NewEnglandLady]

IG, you are going to LOVE WP2! You will have a wonderful time and it is going to beautiful, fun and perfect for you and your husband! Don''t worry about ANYTHING, just have a lovely time and enjoy every second of it! I think what''s great about what you''re doing is that (hopefully) you won''t have any nerves. Sometimes I think brides need a little time to decompress after the ceremony, so I''m glad that for you it can just be relaxed and fun.

The only lessons I learned were: 1. Tell your mother to keep the dog out of the room with the cake or he will eat it. and 2. Don''t leave your non-drinking husband alone with your heavy-drinking family or you will end up scraping his pantless body off the bathroom floor at 6 a.m. after returning from a long night at the ER where your BIL was diagnosed with a "bruised" leg. If you already know these things, then you''re in good shape!

 

[anchor31]

What about you, Indy? Will you tell us more about WP2?

 

[Fancy605]

I think I would have gotten more sleep the night before. I stayed up too late.

Our wedding was basically perfect to me the day of (except for there was a hang up with the kids food at the wedding not coming out at the right time and we ran out of bread and the computer with all the music on it crashed (luckily our DJ had an amazing back up plan, and no one ever knew that there was a near disaster)). I wouldn''t change much about the actual day.

We planned most everything, but one thing I am glad we had was a super reliable wedding coordinator. I didn''t actually have to worry about a thing because she made sure everything was tended to. I would DEF. suggest that to anyone having a large wedding with lots of details involved.

I would also suggest simply chilling out and enjoying yourself. I was a LOT nervous before the ceremony, but I decided not to let anything-not even a total disaster bother me because either way we would be married! My DH and I both made CERTAIN that we enjoyed every minute of the wedding. My coordinator actually got a little frustrated with me because I ended up being so mellow about the whole situation that I was literally incapable of forming last min opinions. I just kept saying, "Whatever''s easiest." or "whatever you think." She finally got the idea that it would be impossible for her to go wrong and did whatever she wanted about things that arose (like how long before the deremony should we have the candles lit, should we cover the window to the entry way of the church, etc). Some of the wait staff at the reception commented that they couldn''t believe how calm DH and I were at the reception. They said that most brides usually yell at them at least a few times before the night is up (usually for things the staff has no control over). Mean brides. I don''t know... to me, it''s important not to get hung up in the details and imperfections. Just go with it and have fun despite anything else. I mean, in most cases, once the wedding actually starts, it''s too late to do anything about what goes not-so-perfectly. Do all you can to get what you want during the planning phases, but the day of enjoy what you''ve managed to put together. I guess my best advice really is: if some non-perfect thing does happen unexpectedly, just take it in stride.

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Wait, did it already happen? Was it this past weekend? I thought it was this weekend...

 

[Selkie]

Date: 4/17/2008 9:33:32 PM
Author: NewEnglandLady

The only lessons I learned were: 1. Tell your mother to keep the dog out of the room with the cake or he will eat it. and 2. Don''t leave your non-drinking husband alone with your heavy-drinking family or you will end up scraping his pantless body off the bathroom floor at 6 a.m. after returning from a long night at the ER where your BIL was diagnosed with a ''bruised'' leg. If you already know these things, then you''re in good shape!

Wow...those both sound like a helluva story, NEL! I can picture a Newfie looking REAAALLY guilty with frosting all over his face!

 

[Elmorton]

What I learned from the wedding:

At the rehearsal dinner, I realized I''d left 2 whole boxes of table decorations at home. Weddings are like Project Runway - you just make it work. It did, but that was when reality hit and I realized not everything was going to be perfect. Have this realization BEFORE the wedding day - everything else felt like smooth sailing after that.

Relax the night before. I couldn''t figure out why I felt so sad during the rehearsal dinner. My marriage didn''t scare me, but the wedding sure did. Hot tubs fix all problems - make sure the hotel has one!

Do tell your bridesmaids if you don''t like their hairdos. They''ll only hate you for 10 seconds, but you''ll have your photos forever.

Tattoo cover-up is AMAZING when your maid of honor has half sleeves. Do not give her a big hug in the middle of the ceremony though, as that stuff is NOT smear proof as it is advertised.

If you have an outdoor wedding and it''s 95 degrees, provide water. Encourage people to sit on the shady side, even if it looks like no one is there to support the groom. Don''t regret having your wedding outside - who cares if everyone is sweating, you won''t be able to tell in the photos.

Tell your parents the rule about not going to the bride first when something is terribly wrong. If not informed, they may rush up to you right as you get to the reception and explain that no one is sitting where they''re supposed to because the place cards were done wrong.

Explain to your grandparents what place cards are so they don''t mess up the seating arrangements.

Bring extra safety pins in case your dad''s pants break shortly after the ceremony so he doesn''t have to be holding them up with one hand as he dances with you. Big safety pins. Maybe some duct tape to boot.

Buy hankerchiefs for the groomsmen. You''d be surprised, but they''ll use them and they may be life savers.

Spend every minute during the reception with your husband. I think I spent half the time looking for him and half the time with my girlfriends, although he swears he was dancing next to me the whole time. The strangest part about a wedding is how little time you actually spend with your new spouse (maybe that''s why we still have honeymoons!).

Have a smile on your face the whole time - if you do, people will tell you it''s the best wedding they''ve ever been to (in 95 degree weather).

What I didn''t expect:

How I''d be so overwhelmed when I saw all of our friends and family in one place. I was crying the whole way down the aisle because I was so overcome by seeing all the people I loved.

How surreal it would feel to be standing there getting married - I kept on thinking "is this really happening? really?" - later, DH told me all he could think was the same thing.

How tired I''d be afterward. I really wish we would have waited a few months to take the honeymoon. I think we napped through half of it, and those are expensive naps!

How I wouldn''t drink at the reception. Seriously - biggest party ever for my friends and family, and I was stone sober (but had the time of my life!!!)

What I''d do differently:

For the most part, nothing.

I wish I''d been more attentive to my grandparents and one of our readers who were most affected by the heat, but I was in such a daze, and we did get those photos done very quickly. I just wish we''d thought ahead and had water for them.

There was one point where I snapped at my dad - he hadn''t read his itinerary and didn''t realize that we also needed to "tear down" the reception in the morning. He made a comment about "everything he had to do" and since I''d planned the wedding alone (with DH), I didn''t take that well. That was really the only low point, bridezilla moment that I honestly regret. I did apologize after the wedding, and he didn''t even remember it.

OH! I would have bought champagne for the limo. I forgot, so a friend''s DH went out for it and all he could find close by was not chilled. Cold champagne is better than warm, but I''m sooo thankful we had it at all!

DH just added - he would have had a nice talk with our ushers and made sure they knew what to do. Ceremony seating was a bit hap-hazard, and we had parents and grandparents who were somehow seated in the 4th row.

 

[diamondfan]

I am certainly not in the newly married category but recall issues with my wedding still to this day so hope my input is of value!

I think I would not sweat small things on the day of. Up until the day, micromanage away if that is your nature. But, the day of, unless you know it is something resolvable, it will just stress you out.

Stand firm, know what you want, and in a nice manner, express that. Try to not get sucked in or bullied by parents just because they are paying and holding things over your head.

Try to enjoy, though it will be a blur. After all is said and done, the most important thing is marrying the man you love, so honestly, just keep that in mind. You might not eat or get to see everyone, but try to relish the moment. After months and even years of planning it can be over in a flash.

 

[AmberGretchen]

Hmmm...one important piece of advice I wish I''d listened to would be to make sure you eat regularly, even if its just small meals. I had an early breakfast and then skipped lunch and I was really carsick in the limo between the ceremony and the reception - definitely no fun

I''d also recommend, as Fancy suggested, truly making a point to enjoy and experience the whole event. Its so incredible to feel how much all of your friends and family love you and how happy they are at this joy that you and your new DH are sharing. I can''t describe what a profoundly wonderful feeling that is adequately, but trust me, its something you don''t want to miss out on.

I guess my other piece of advice would be related to the above, which is, don''t have anyone at your wedding that you can''t imagine having them feel that way for and about you on that day. My father and stepmother were those people, and while my day as a whole was still incredible and amazing and I wouldn''t change it, it was very hurtful to have people there who were too wrapped up in their own issues to be truly happy for me and my DH on such a special day.

 

[julabean]

Things I learned:
-The few months, weeks, days leading up to your wedding might be stressful, but it''s really an incredible time in your life, so try and enjoy your FI as much as possible. We really had a lot of fun in the last month or so before we got married and I think it helped us both keep a level head.
-If you are planning on having pictures done before the ceremony, stay near your venue. Don''t go tromping off to another hotel because you think it''s prettier. It''s not. Stay where you are getting married at, especially if it''s really sunny and your FI is not wearing a hat with his tux.
-If you know there is someone who can cause potential drama (in my case, my sister), fill one of your trusted friends in on it beforehand. If that person starts getting out of hand on the day of, let them take care of it. (MOH did - and did it well.)

Things I didn''t expect:
-People not showing up and probably really anticipating showing up, regardless of their positive RSVP.
-How much FUN people would have at my wedding. I had this fear that everything was going to suck, but I think we had one of the funnest weddings I''ve ever been to.
-My little cousin remembering who I was at barely 2 years old, when she hadn''t seen me in over a year. And then wanting to sit on my lap for the entire dinner.
-Random people taking my picture (we got married in Vegas).
-Losing it BEFORE I walked down the aisle.
-My SHOES breaking two days before my wedding when I was breaking them in.

What I Would Have Done Differently:
-Stopped freaking out about my wedding planner''s tip 10 minutes before the ceremony. Good god, it wasn''t like I wasn''t going to be at the hotel another 3 days! (Guess it''s a good sign, though, if all I''m freaking out about was my wedding planner''s tip.)
-Planned our pictures beforehand better. We still got great photos, but I wish I would have planned better on this aspect.

 

[Independent Gal]

Yup, WP2 was last Sunday. It went great!

I learned:

- DO sweat the big stuff. I was so conscious of keeping chill and not worrying about anything that I didn't let myself make clear how important certain things really were to me, with respect to the rituals and the ceremony. My father showed up about 45 minutes late for a pre-ceremony ritual and then we didn't have time to do it properly, and I felt so sad, like that's something I'll never get back that was really meaningful to me. I was being so chill, telling everyone to relax and that it was all good, that no one realized - even me - how important certain things were to me.


So, my advice:
Take some time to think about what DOES matter to you, make it clear to those around you "this really matters to me, it's important to me that we do this part of the day right" and then they'll know to make a special effort. It doesn't make you a bridezilla to express what's meaningful to you.

I learned:

How totally invaluable bridesmaids actually are. Even if they are 'fake ones' (my girls didn't have matching dresses and didn't have to do anything specific). One of my bridesmaids in particular was like a rock. Just having her there made me feel more secure, and twice she saved the day when things went wrong. Plus, after the ritual mishap above, she manoeuvred two minutes of alone time for me so she could give me a hug and let me vent a little. She was awesome. We've been friends for 25 years and I really know why. My sister was also a rockstar. I forgot to bring the envelope for the DJ and she just ran back to the hotel, at the first appropriate moment, and got it for me.

My advice:
Bring champagne for while you're getting dressed to celebrate and toast your friendships. You don't get many chances this perfect to really tell your friends and sisters how much you truly love and treasure them. Give your bm's heartfelt gifts, tell them how much they mean to you.

I learned:
I started my day with a walk on my own, then met up with my bm's and my mom to go for lunch at a hole in the wall. We were all getting excited, but getting excited somewhere relaxed helps YOU relax! It was great fun and put everyone in a good mood.

My advice:
Incorporate something familiar and chilled out into your day, something you and your BM's would do on a normal day.

I learned:
How extraordinary my new in-laws really are. My FIL painstakingly learned to sing some of the ritual prayers in the ceremony in a language he neither reads nor speaks and stood up there in front of his historical enemies and sang them. Some of my family were victims of the war with his country, and there were a lot of tears and sniffles. Everyone was very deeply moved by his extraordinary gesture.

I learned:
It is possible to serve 80 people a mind-blowingly good meal EVEN AT A WEDDING, if you find the right chef. I couldn't believe it. Neither could my guests. Everyone was high on the food. They said it was not only by a MILE the best wedding meal ever, it was one of the best meals ever.

And finally, I learned I had a new skill:

Give me $18,000 and I can throw one hell of a KICK-ASS party!!

The wedding started at 5:30, and in the wee hours, people were still dancing, laughing and having a great time. We only left because I was feeling bad for the staff and for my DJ friend.

 

[CJ2008]

Guys,

I am so loving this thread. I can''t even begin to tell you how incredibly helpful it is.

IG, thanks for starting it.

claudinam

P.S.: My wedding is June 17, so I''m taking notes!

 

[Independent Gal]

It''s funny what Elmorton said about the BM hair-do''s. My best friend has really cute thick curly short hair and she usually wears a ribbon in it. For the wedding, she had it straightened, and although she looked gorgeous, it felt all weird, because I was used to her usual hair. I didn''t say anything and I think that was the right decision since it didn''t really matter to me, but I was surprised at how kind of fond and attached I was to her everyday hair-do and how taken aback I was by her fancy do!

 

[Independent Gal]

One more thing: I know there are a few other couples on here who have a massive height difference (DH = 6''5" Indy = 5''2"). It is really hard to get good pictures with that kind of height difference. Ask your photographer beforehand to try to engineer some.

 

[diamondfan]

IG, I think it IS vital to say and be open about the things you want, even if they are smaller things. I just think that the day of the wedding, unless something that is not right can be fixed, at that point, being upset about it only hurt me...but boy, up until the day of, I was specific.

I am now planning a second bar mitzvah and I really learned from the first one. Some things went well, some did not, and I made notes! But that night, I just tried to enjoy it and know my son was happy so that is what mattered most.

I will bet you throw a great party...sounds like it was amazing.

 

[Mandarine]

hmm...

- I learned that you have to take a step back and take everything in (otherwise you won''t remember much! lol). I purposely did this during the reception and just took a look around...and I remember that exact moment!. DH didn''t so he missed a lot of the details...hehe

- Make sure you have more than enough time to get ready!!! we ran late due to some issues with the hotel and at the end I had to hurry!

- Make sure you know what payments you have pneding the day off and that you assign someone to take care of those for you. I was suppossed to bring cash for the limo and completely forgot!!! then we had to go around asking the bridal party for cash...a little embarassing!!...lol

- Don''t spend your reception saying hello to people...just dance the night away, if they want to come say hello...they''ll know where to find you

(or at least they knre where to find me! haha)

- Make sure your dad doesn''t need to take a bathroom break right before walking you down the asile!!!...mine did and the bridal march started and he was still not back! didn''t help me feel calm, but it was sort of funny...

- If you have a non-traditional guestbook (I had rocks) then write a poem or have someone tell the first few guests what they are suppossed to do!.

That''s all I can think of right now

M~

 

[sumbride]

This is from the thread I posted right after my big day:


1) Hire a day of coordinator. It cost me $250 but she kept the peace, got everybody in the right spot, and gave people a different target for their questions and emotional breakdowns. Don''t like what''s happening? Not my fault! Yell at the day of lady! We had a couple of personality clashes, but in the end, I was glad we hired her. Ask your florist and photographer for recommendations. They know who is good. And listen to her! She wanted me to cut the cake when we came in the room. I declined, and that was ok, but we ended up doing the father daughter dance right after the cake cutting and nobody saw it because they were all standing in line for cake. I should have done the dance BEFORE the cake.

2) Have candy in the bridal suite. For the bride? well, yes, but most importantly, that box of Lemonheads I brought with me worked REALLY well at getting the flower girls to stop crying, wear the head piece, and walk down the aisle. I didn''t know how much it helped until my sister in law told me the next day that she had the rest of the box in her purse.

3) Eat SOMETHING. Eat before you put on your dress... but not too much... just a little something bland and full of protein. Then, eat something between the wedding and the reception. One of my friends made a plate for me and pulled me into the corner of the dining room, away from everyone else, so I could eat and refresh before dancing the night away. It was the best thing ever. Later on, hubby and I walked around the buffet, munching, but we made sure the photographer wasn''t looking! What? never seen a bride eating a lamb chop directly from the chafing dish? it was GOOD.

4) Stay hydrated. I was really worried about needing to use the facilities in my dress. Especially since I''d had a nervous bladder all morning and up until I put the thing on I was in the bathroom every half hour! But one of my friends told me she had worried too and ended up not needing to. I kept her in mind but I still didn''t drink much for the first 2 hours in my dress. Finally I chilled out when people handed me a drink with a straw. And for the record, I didn''t end up needing to go until after I took my dress off!

5) Figure out your exit well before it''s time to leave. We were signalling the DJ that we were ready to leave when my mom said "where are the keys to the car?" I said "umm... in my purse... that my sister took to the hotel!" we had a brief minute of panic before I remembered that no, I hadn''t actually gotten them back from my MOH who drove us to the club, so they were, in fact, in her posession, and she was still there. Crisis averted, but it didn''t make for a smooth ending. Also, my sis had taken MY stuff to the hotel, but DH''s stuff was still in the locker room. It was gathered up by drunk friends and put in someone''s trunk and he didn''t get it until 2 days later. Luckily we weren''t leaving the next morning. If he''d taken 5 minutes to pack it up and give it to my sis, he would have had his shoes and deodarant available immediately.

6) Emergency Kits Ours were STOCKED. And all that really got used was the advil, immodium, tums, breath mints and double stick tape. But at least we had everything available to us. Of course, one of those same drunk friends that mixed up M''s stuff, dumped the mens kit all over the lobby of the country club, so make sure the lid can be easily secured!

7) Be nice! tensions can run high on the wedding day but make sure that you''re careful with your targets. The only person I really got mad at was my makeup artist, but I never have to see her again, so that''s ok. I didn''t yell at her, but I was fuming by the time I left because she made us late. Your wedding party and your family don''t deserve to be yelled at! Make it a happy time and keep them from hating you later!

Practice the art of seclusion! By surrounding you with people that can help keep others away from you, you will be able to stay calm. The chairs were originally set up in the wrong place, but I didn''t know about it until the next day. The cake was an hour late. Didn''t know about it. You don''t NEED to know. It will be better if you don''t. At the same time, it''s good to have people give you "happy progress reports". When our judge arrived, she passed on a message to tell me. I heard "She''s here, just wanted you to know!" and "The DJ is setting up now!" and "the weather has REALLY cooled down" (it hadn''t but it was nice to hear). It''s ok to not know everything.

9) Enjoy it! I think it was JCrow that said she didn''t want to spend her whole wedding catching up with her mom''s 3rd cousin''s daughter, or something like that.... so I practiced that same thing. We had a LOT of people at our wedding and I knew I wouldn''t be able to talk to everyone, so I decided to just have fun and now when I look back at the wedding, I''m really glad that I wasn''t stuck in small talk the whole night.

10) Let it go. The idea of picking 3 things that you care about during planning is very important to keep you focused, but when it gets to be the day of and even those 3 things aren''t EXACTLY what you wanted... realize that you can''t redo it and just go forward. Maybe you can get money back later, but don''t let it ruin your day. Nobody else noticed. Really.

 

[Selkie]

Things I learned, or was glad I did:

Doing at least some of your photos before the ceremony is AWE.SOME. Especially if it gives you and DH a chance to see each other in relative privacy.

If you plan an outside wedding in the summer, it CAN and WILL rain. Be prepared. Don''t fall apart, adjust.
Corollary: Your friends and family are there for you, and will pull through for you in amazing ways if you need them. I know a lot went on behind the scenes to get our venue and vendors sorted out after a last minute change of plans.

Get a massage! Either the day before or the morning of. Ahhhhh.

Unless you''ve abstained for weeks before, or have waited to get married to "be" together, don''t expect fireworks on the wedding night!

You''ll be pretty exhausted by that point. Still, it is VERY special to suddenly be alone together as a married couple after a crazy, relative and friend-filled day.

 

[SarahLovesJS]

I

this thread, thank you everyone for contributing!!

 

[Independent Gal]

I just thought of another one. Tape up your strapless dress! Even if it feels totally secure. I thought mine was secure, but with all the energetic dancing, my bra was peeking out and it took me a while to notice. Uhm, embarrassing! I''m a little worried it will be in all the photos. Then I was standing outside around midnight with my my friend T who was having a cigarette, and I said "Check me out, what a classy bride! My nose is running, my bra is showing..." so he said "Yeah, you know, to complete the look, you should start a fight or something."

Tape tape tape! And a packet of kleenex.

 

[neatfreak]

I have one! Wear spanx/longline bra even if you don't really need them! I didn't and I regret it because there are some very unflattering pictures of me at the reception (after the alcohol!) with my tummy pooched out a bit when spanx would have forced me to suck it in.

And the best advice I received is take some time on your day to smell the roses. It will be over before you know it!!!!

 

[sklingem]

(1)Well, something will go wrong and not all of your expectations are going to be met. So it is a good idea to prepare yourself mentally for it.
(2) Even though I had a smallish wedding (90 people) I still did not have time to really talk to everybody. I wished I could have interacted more with my guests.

 

[mimzy]

this thread is making me nervous! i'm flaky by nature and i have a feeling that that fact coupled with the fact that something WILL go wrong is making me think that i am going to make the whole thing a disaster!. for the first time i'm freaking out, and i still have 8 more months!

. there is just too much to think about and organize!

 

[SarahLovesJS]

Date: 4/18/2008 12:31:11 PM
Author: mimzy
this thread is making me nervous! i''m flaky by nature and i have a feeling that that fact coupled with the fact that something WILL go wrong is making me think that i am going to make the whole thing a disaster!. for the first time i''m freaking out, and i still have 8 more months!

. there is just too much to think about and organize!

Only thing I am more worried about is that''ll it''ll rain at my wedding ahhhhh!! No rain pleaseeee!

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Date: 4/18/2008 12:39:53 PM
Author: SarahLovesJS

Date: 4/18/2008 12:31:11 PM
Author: mimzy
this thread is making me nervous! i''m flaky by nature and i have a feeling that that fact coupled with the fact that something WILL go wrong is making me think that i am going to make the whole thing a disaster!. for the first time i''m freaking out, and i still have 8 more months!

. there is just too much to think about and organize!

Only thing I am more worried about is that''ll it''ll rain at my wedding ahhhhh!! No rain pleaseeee!

Naturally thething you worry about the most is the one thing that is completely out of your control! We had an outdoor wedding AND reception and it was suppoesd to rain tht day--even the forecast that morning called for rain. It didn''t. BUT! You just have to make sure you have a plan B and try not to worry. Rain or no rain, the wedding will be wonderful.

 

[Sha]

What I learnt:

HAVE A MAKE-UP AND HAIR TRIAL!!!

 

[onedrop]

This is a GREAT thread!

The thing I didn''t realize would happen is that all of the detailed planning I did regarding the ceremony music and flowers and all is a blur, even today. I just don''t remember any of that! Which is why it was great to have a video. So if you can afford it, I really suggest it!

If people ask...let them help! Don''t, don''t, don''t try to do it all yourself.

This is a personal piece of advice: don''t let other issues cloud your planning process if you can at all avoid it. I had a situation going on with my best friend that almost destroyed any happiness and enthusiasm surrounding my wedding planning. My mother had to pull me aside and have a serious talk with me before I even realized what was happening. So in a nutshell just try to insulate yourself to outside drama, because you don''t want to look up and realize that you missed it all because your energy was in the wrong place.

 

[Rhea]

It takes people a bit of time to get into the dancing after the first dance. Bribe, beg, and blackmail your friends into dancing for the 2nd dance if you embarrass at all. After our first dance I was so embarrassed. I froze mid-way into the 2nd song, turned, and left the dance floor. No one else noticed that I was crying, I''m told. My bustle had come undone anyway so people thought that was why I left suddenly.

We had a great DJ, just no one danced the 2nd song. My wedding planner was awesome and pulled aside a couple of friends and asked them to dance. She also fixed my make-up, got me a glass of wine, and told me jokes until I laughed and could return to the party a few minutes later. She really made it look as though I''d just gone to the bathroom to fix my bustle and was having a great time. Good thing too, I was in tears because I was embarrassed and then embarrassed because I was in tears - stupid cycle. No one wants to have photos of them getting upset and crying on their wedding day.

Expect people not to dance on the 2nd, 3rd, and maybe even the 4th song. It takes time (and sometimes lots of alcohol!) for people to be comfortable busting a move in front of others while many cameras are present.

 

[janinegirly]

I wish I''d read a thread like this before my wedding!

Things I''m glad I did:

*pushed for a traditional wedding. It''s nice to look back at the pictures and backdrop and it all looks so romantic and timeless. That stuf is priceless.
*glad I didn''t cut corners on the details (within reason)
*got a live band for music (it made the reception!)
*took dance lessons!

Things I wish I had done:

*not stressed so much about what guests would do between church and reception (there was a good 4 hrs there). I even had a whole display of food in a banquet room at the reception site for the 4 hrs. No one came! They all just took care of themselves..so it was a waste

*this one is TOUGH to control, but yes, I wish I didn''t get stressed when things did go wrong (all groomsmen late for rehearsal. One groomsman went AWOL right around time of introductions). People did let me down, but I should''ve just smiled. (EASIER said than done!)
*wish I had smiled more whenever I saw cameras! I was happy but wanted to appear natural when I saw photog snapping away, but in some shots it just looks like I wasn''t smiling!
*wish I had had a better videographer and asked the photographer to get more shots of family.

 

[buttercup80]

Date: 4/18/2008 10:12:12 AM
Author: Independent Gal
Take some time to think about what DOES matter to you, make it clear to those around you ''this really matters to me, it''s important to me that we do this part of the day right'' and then they''ll know to make a special effort. It doesn''t make you a bridezilla to express what''s meaningful to you.

Thanks, Indy - that was very eloquently put. . .