Home New baby travel advice for the holidays

[lurkinglurker]

I don’t post that often, but have been reading the pregnancy/baby/babygear threads a lot lately and I was hoping to get your advice on something! We are expecting our first baby (a girl!) on Nov. 17th this year. I’m wondering what we should tentatively plan for Christmas. Both of our families are located in the same city three hours away from us and this is the first grandchild on each side, so there is a lot of excitement. In fact, I think my husband’s aunt and uncle have already changed their (cross-country) travel plans to be at his parents’ this year - mainly to see the baby. And my grandparents are rapidly approaching 90 - so everyone is anxious to see her soon soon soon! But both of our immediate families (parents) will be staying near our house after the birth so they will see her before the holidays.

Originally I had been thinking that we would drive up for a few days at Christmas and see everyone and celebrate her first Christmas. The trip would consist really of just us in the car and then at our family homes (my parents, his parents, my grandparents.) There will be some other children there, and some non-immediate family.

I realized that the baby won’t have any of her shots at this point (she’ll be ~5 weeks or less if she comes near her due date). Given this, is it too risky to be around other non-immediate family? Should I rethink our plan and warn everyone now that we may not be there for the holiday? Am I way over thinking this and just need to relax? We are really close with both sets of parents so we can be open and direct about what we are thinking.

Any thoughts or advice would really be appreciated!

 

[Mara]

I would probably have taken our baby out at 5 weeks to do a holiday with family. We were not overly protective of keeping him in the house and he didn't mind the car either so a road trip would have been fine. But it really just depends on your comfort level --which honestly you may not KNOW until the baby is here. Some parents may think they are going to be one way but then when the babe is here, it may be a different situ. Also--you could be struggling with breastfeeding or what if you have to have a c-section, are you going to want to be traveling while healing etc.

I might try to prepare the family for the option you won't be there but then if everything goes great, it might not even be an issue.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

My daughter was born in early November and we went out of state for Christmas (I believe for a week) that year. I never really second guessed it. Everyone washed their hands when they held her and we obviously kept her indoor. She slept all the time so the 8 hour drive was really no big deal. I remembering pumping while we were driving (hello truckers) and feeding her with a bottle so we didn't have to stop (we introduced a bottle very early). I DID have a tough recovery but I was fine and looking forward to the help and distraction of seeing friends and family. We took her on a 4 hour flight that Feb. and that might have been too early. She ended up getting her first cold shortly after we returned and I am certain she picked something up on the flight. It is scary when babies that small are sick.

 

[TravelingGal]

Me, personally, I'd skip it. Not that time of year (cold/flu eason) with her not old enough to get immunizations.

 

[Lanie]

Lurking -- I'm so glad you posted this question! My baby will be born right around Christmas (God willing) and so both sets of inlaws and countless numbers of relatives will be stopping by our house to "give us our Christmas gifts", i.e. hold the baby. And I was wondering the same thing! I'm sure you will get some good advice from the experienced Mamas.

Mara -- this is interesting that you posted this due to your other post on the pertussis girl at the party. I've been wondering, and don't mean to thread jack, but how did you find out/she find out she was exposed? Based on everything you write, I think we have similar personalities as far as how paranoid we are/relaxed we are. Who did you ask to get the vaccine? I really, honest to God, think some members of both of our families would laugh if I asked them to get a shot, and they'd start spreading around that I'm a germ phobe, when in fact I'm not! I've been a very relaxed preggo and I don't see that changing much when the critter is born. Same with washing hands...did you get any eye rolls or anything like that if you requested it? My brother would literally laugh in my face and just take my baby if I asked him to wash his hands first.

 

[Mara]

Hey Lanie I'll put my response to you in the preggo thread re the pertussis.

 

[Lanie]

Good idea...thanks!

 

[swingirl]

I wouldn't plan anything until you have the baby. YOU might not feel like traveling. Christmas break is a great time to pick up flus and colds, too.

Don't promise anything and play it by ear. I wouldn't worry about a 3 hour car trip, though. I'd be more concerned about exposure to a bunch of people during flu and cold season.

 

[ChinaCat]

Ditto to wait and seeing how you feel.

As far as 5 weeks PP, I would have been good to go and a car ride would be fine. But my little one was born in August and there was the swine flu outbreak so I was way more homebound and careful than I had planned. For the first two months we really didn't take him anywhere, save for some walks and maybe the grocery store or something. It sucked. I did take him to my parents' house (5 hour car ride) and people did come see him, but I was just careful with not letting people come over that were sick. And yes I made everyone wash their hands and use antibacterial cleaner. I am not a germophobe, but my ped really overemphasized how dangerous swine flu could be to a newborn.

No one really said anything but if they did I just reminded them of swine flu and that shut them up. Plus I didn't care if they did roll their eyes, they were still washing their hands!

 

[Lanie]

lurking -- I just reread your post and noticed that children will be there too. That's a tough situation bc kids (depending on age) can be super germ threats, especially that time of year. They will ALL want to hold and touch your baby. I see it with my nieces and nephews. And it's hard to say no to them, or to tell a three year old in time to wash his hands before they run up and touch and give kisses. Just something to remember. I'm sure you'll be okay with the adults. And I wouldn't want the aftermath of a sick baby on a car trip home!

 

[AmberWaves]

Hi! My baby was born November 24th, so it's around the time you're due. Lucky for us, our families are closer than yours, but we still went to four different homes for Christmas. Two on Christmas Eve and two on Christmas day. There were children at three of those occasions. The children were almost all family, barring one party, but they never touched the baby. Honestly, she was fine. Didn't get sick at all.

Perhaps it was a stupid choice, I dunno, everyone would come to our house anyway to see her, so it was just easier to go see everyone at once.

ETA: We didn't let kids close enough touch her- only the older kids who knew to wash their hands, and were watched to be sure they did it with soap. My husband held her but he's super tall so kids couldn't get to her anyway.

 

[KimberlyH]

we took our daughter to my parents' for my grandmothers' 90th birthday at 6 weeks. i was a bit overwhelmed but glad we went.

if i were you i'd play it by ear, decide how you're feeling and if you're up for traveling after baby arrives and tell everyone not to count on you coming. also, choose one place to stay, where you're most comfortable, rather than house hopping or get a hotel room. it would not be fun to move baby and gear to three different houses.

 

[lurkinglurker]

Thank you so much for taking the time to respond! I really appreciate the insight and different BTDT perspectives.

Tacori and Amber - it’s really good to hear that ya’ll were still able to enjoy that first major holiday with family without being too worried!

Kimberly - So glad you got to make it to your grandmother’s 90th! I’m really hoping that our baby will be able to at least meet her 3 great grandparents. And that’s a good idea on staying put in one location. We usually bounce around between the houses - there all about 5 mins from each other, but I’m thinking it would be better to have a base of operations so to speak.

Lanie - Congrats on your pregnancy too! I know, the little kids do make a difference. My step-sister is having a little boy in September, so he will be a new baby too and then she has a 3 and 6 year old. I can’t help but see them as walking germ factories right now. I know, not the nicest view ever.

ChinaCat - I’m worried swine flu will be back this year! If I’m remembering right, you’re in Texas? We are too and between thinking about another swine flu season and the whooping cough outbreaks near us in Austin I’ve gotten a little freaked out. It’s good to know that people were respectful of the hand washing. Maybe I will travel with a giant bottle of hand sanitizer.

Mara, TGal, and Swin - it’s interesting to hear your different responses! I think I will go ahead and let both sides know that I’m worried about it and try to see what disappointment levels we’d be dealing with if we missed it.

 

[ChinaCat]

LL- Yep, I'm in Texas. I personally thought the whole swine flu thing got blown out of proportion last year BUT when it comes to newborns you just have to be extra careful. My dr really stressed not taking him around many people till he got his shots at 2 months. We tried, but you just can't stay in your house for 2 months. If we went out, I just left him in his car seat and covered him with a A&A muslin blanket so people couldn't touch or breathe on him.

The thing is though, they aren't totally protected at 2 months, and they can't even get flu shots till at least 6 months. So you have to balance being careful with living your life.

You've got two things to think about here. One is how YOU will be feeling and two is protecting your newborn from germs.

See how you feel. If you aren't up for it, just say you're not doing it. People may be disappointed, but the great thing about new babies is that most people understand and they are GREAT excuses for not having to do things. Or blame it on your pedi.

Second, if you do want to go, just be really clear about him not being around sick people. I went to Target and picked up tons of the small hand desanitzers and put them in every room he was in, in every diaper bag, in my car, etc. No one touched him without washing their hands. Even me. You simply cannot protect him from every unknown germ out there, but you can do your best to keep people from touching him.

Good luck! Keep us posted.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

Aidan will be about 13-14 weeks old at Christmas time. We travel every year for the holidays, both of our families live about 2-3 hours away. This year we're not traveling and I'm excited. We put out an open invitation for people to come to our house to see Aidan and celebrate Christmas but we're not leaving.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

I am pretty laid-back. So my comfort level seems different than the normal first time mom. Actually the first major holiday was Thanksgiving. She was itty, bitty and even though we did not travel, family came to us. She was around lots of people and I am sure lots of germs. Just follow your instinct.

 

[MustangGal]

We traveled 4 hours to family for Easter when Kyle was 8 weeks. I had a c-section and was fine recovery-wise. He did get his first shots the day before we left, but they wouldn't have been protecting him much then anyway. I knew it would be the only time for the grea grandparents to see him until Thanksgiving, so we went for it. I am really laid back though, we passed him around and had a great time.

I did get invaded by family at the 3 week mark, DH's 30th b-day. We had siblings and both sets of parents along with 2 year old nephew and had no issues with anyone being sick.

 

[phoenixgirl]

Claire was born October 23, and we saw a bunch of family over Thanksgiving when she was about 5 weeks. Honestly, if a person or child didn't seem or report to be ill, I wasn't worried. Her cousins petted her and held her and propped their baby dolls up next to her . . .

So it's not an automatic "no," but if there are reports of illness among the family or a bug making its way around at that point, you might decide to skip it.

 

[Pandora II]

I'm pretty laid back on the whole germ thing... disinfectant etc doesn't exist in my house and I think plenty of exposure to germs and eating mud etc is good for the immune system.

I have a great immune system and almost never get anything; DH is immuno-compromised and gets every bug and illness around and sometimes multiple times. So, I knew she'd be exposed to illness very early on. New babies actually have good immunity since they have your antibodies in their systems plus if you are breast-feeding they will continue to get your antibodies.

We travelled to see my parents when she was two weeks old - 3 hour drive and she screamed for 2 hrs 40 minutes - and DH's mother when she was 3 weeks old - 4.5 hour drive and she screamed for 4 hours solid... was great...