need your opinions- drama!!

[mayachel]

You want my opinion? How lucky are you, that your fiance''s family obviously adores their son''s choice and has the means to help give you a stunning ring to boot. Congratulations on your engagement.

 

[lisa1.01fvs1]

Where r the pics!

I think it was a nice gesture by his parents and a lot of people do this as a bride's parents typically pay for wedding.

Who cares anyway - you enjoy your gorgeous ring and take what ur "friend" said w/ a grain of salt!

Engagements are strange things and can bring out the worst/best and everything inbetween in people.

Congratulations!!!!

 

[Lorelei]

Date: 8/31/2009 9:35:03 AM
Author: Madam Bijoux
Congratulations on your engagement!

That ''friend'' is not your friend. She''ll probably keep trying to rain on your parade from now until you drop her or until she finds somebody else to make miserable. People like her are the reason we have 2 ears on our heads: let what they say go in one ear and out the other one.

Ditto!

 

[ilovethiswebsite]

Firstly - I think your friend is uber jealous and just could'nt keep to herself... In terms of having parents pay for a ring - I think this is standard in more collectivistic cultures. Here in america many would find this weird as we tend to value independence. But we have to remember in some cultures getting married is viewed as a family affair and paying for your son's ring to proprose with is OK and even preferred. For example, good friend of mine recently got engaged and his parents, who are very religious Jews, helped him pick out the diamond and pay for it. So I think it really depends on your cultural background- there is no right or wrong here. You may also want to keep this info to yourself as who paid for the ring is a private matter and some people may wrongfully judge him for it (like your best friend).

 

[isaku5]

As the mother of a son, I would be a little surprised to be asked to help out with the ring, but would probably do it. I would expect that when he got married, his dad and I would put money toward his wedding, though.

A lot of those things would depend on his circumstances at the time (and also whether he chose a bride that we thought would be good to him

)

For the record, our son was 24 when he proposed (with a custom made ring he and the jeweller designed). We were not asked for money, but would have given it gladly. He and his bride had a medium sized wedding (~100 guests) and we offered to pay for the open bar. They very graciously accepted.

They're still happily married and will celebrate their 17th anniversary on the 19th of this month. They're off to Jamaica for a week of celebration and we'll have the pleasure of looking after their 13 year old daughter

. I made the offer to look after her while they went on their second ever vacation without her. (They had never wanted to ask us before

)

ETA: Tell your 'friend' to take a permanent hike.

 

[Luckyeshe]

Congrats on the engagement!!!! Don''t let your friend rain on your parade! I hope you get to put this behind you and enjoy your beautiful ring!!

I think your friend may have been a bit narrow-minded. I agree with everyone here. The assistance on the ring may be to help the groom or the groom''s family''s way of helping with the wedding since the bride''s family is traditionally the one who pays for the wedding. I liked the idea that the sons received diamonds from the parents since the daughter''s wedding was taken care for.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 8/31/2009 11:11:27 AM
Author: ilovethiswebsite
Firstly - I think your friend is uber jealous and just could''nt keep to herself... In terms of having parents pay for a ring - I think this is standard in more collectivistic cultures. Here in america many would find this weird as we tend to value independence. But we have to remember in some cultures getting married is viewed as a family affair and paying for your son''s ring to proprose with is OK and even preferred. For example, good friend of mine recently got engaged and his parents, who are very religious Jews, helped him pick out the diamond and pay for it. So I think it really depends on your cultural background- there is no right or wrong here. You may also want to keep this info to yourself as who paid for the ring is a private matter and some people may wrongfully judge him for it (like your best friend).

Yup. I''m always amazed that some people don''t have an inkling that how things are done in other cultures may be different from their own.

 

[princesss]

Date: 8/31/2009 12:24:42 PM
Author: TravelingGal

Date: 8/31/2009 11:11:27 AM
Author: ilovethiswebsite
Firstly - I think your friend is uber jealous and just could''nt keep to herself... In terms of having parents pay for a ring - I think this is standard in more collectivistic cultures. Here in america many would find this weird as we tend to value independence. But we have to remember in some cultures getting married is viewed as a family affair and paying for your son''s ring to proprose with is OK and even preferred. For example, good friend of mine recently got engaged and his parents, who are very religious Jews, helped him pick out the diamond and pay for it. So I think it really depends on your cultural background- there is no right or wrong here. You may also want to keep this info to yourself as who paid for the ring is a private matter and some people may wrongfully judge him for it (like your best friend).

Yup. I''m always amazed that some people don''t have an inkling that how things are done in other cultures may be different from their own.

Yeah, but to be fair, people often don''t realize they may differ until they actually have a chance to talk to somebody from a different culture.

While I hesitate to label your friend "jealous," I do think that any friend worth having would know how to exercise a little bit of tact (or, really, the ability to bite her tongue!) about something so important to you.