Need your help! Broken engagement, want to buy a "self love" ring!

[mizzbutterfly]

Hi all,

I hope I am posting this in the right forum.
This is a dreadful time for me. My 1.5 year engagement was called off by my ex-fiancé. He was adamant in wanting my e-ring back... and so I gave it to him, well- he actually forcefully took it. Although in the beginning I thought that the setting was too high, I had grown absolutely in love with it. And now, my left hand is empty and I am having a hard time with it; I find myself walking around hiding my left hand.
I think I have come to the conclusion, that as part of my healing process I'd like to buy myself a ring- not an e-ring, but a "self love" ring with a gem/simulated gem or something to wear on my middle finger on my left hand. I'd love a yellow gold band for this, but as you can imagine, the broken engagement has left me in not the greatest financial position. Ideally, I'd like to spend around $200 USD.

Below are a few rings I like, but the yellow gold is a bit out of reach for me:

Morganite Ring

Green Radiant Moissanite Ring

Purple Amethyst

Or do you think I should just settle for silver? Im hesitant to get anything thats gold filled/vermeil because of durability.

Thanks :p

 

[seaurchin]

If you did settle for silver, you'd have a lot more choice about what to get. Real gold on $200 is not impossible though, especially if you include secondhand rings in your search. I don't like gold filled either, for the same reason you mentioned.

Sorry your engagement didn't work out. It sounds like you may have dodged a bullet there though.

 

[AprilBaby]

Maybe check a pawn shop. Lots of good deals there in gold.

 

[nala]

Post this in preloved forum so folks can see what they might be willing to sell you. eBay has lots of options too.

 

[OdetteOdile]

I am so sorry to hear that you are going through such a rough time. I love your idea of buying yourself a ring and I think the 3 rings that you attached are all beautiful. I wish you all the best. Things will get better.

 

[mrs-b]

How about gold-plated silver? I like this one, and it's *very* pretty without being too 'engagement-y':

Purple Amethyst Ring, Sterling Silver Ring, Gold Plated Ring, Pear Amethyst Ring, Handmade Ring, Stacking Ring, February Birthstone Ring - Etsy

This Statement Rings item by AdyahDesigns has 996 favorites from Etsy shoppers. Ships from India. Listed on Jan 19, 2024

www.etsy.com

 

[mrs-b]

Just by the way - what size are you?

 

[doberman]

I'm sorry about your engagement ending. I will say that I think you dodged a bullet there. Anyone who would grab something off you is not someone to marry.

I like the morganite ring and I would say to have it done in 14kt if you can possibly afford it. Silver tarnishes my skin, but maybe you dont have that problem.

 

[123ducklings]

I’m sorry you’re going through this! I’d post on the preloved board, checkout LoupeTroop, and visit local pawn shops. I think you can definitely find something gold and great if you go the preloved route, and I think the idea of giving yourself and a preloved treasure a fresh and fabulous start together is lovely. Best of luck in your search!

 

[Big Fat Facets]

im so very sorry, you are going through a rough time. you are likely much better off. probably not a good idea, to make a lifelong commitment, to someone, that will "forcefully" take a ring or anything for that matter, off your person, even in anger.

you will see better days ahead, even if it doesn't feel like it now. that i promise.

fabulous idea to get oneself a "selflove" ring. as the others have suggested already ...
loupetroop, ebay, the preloved ps jewels the secondary market is your best bet to help you get the nicest ring for your budget

im a fan of gold. i wouldn't settle for silver, unless it is what you like

 

[rockhoundofficiando]

Another vote for buying preloved. I would check pawn shops. If it's between the above you posted, I like the Morganite ring, but in gold. The gold version is only $100 more and will last you a lifetime.

Sorry to hear about your broken engagement but good riddance to anyone who would "forcefully" take your ring.

 

[ItsMainelyYou]

(((Hugs))) soooo many hugs.
What a crap sandwich of a situation.
Everybody is right. You are going to come out of this stronger for it, and that's something. I think the symbolism is a lovely thing. I can't wait to see what you find.

 

[kgizo]

I’m so sorry you are going through a difficult time. A self love ring sounds like a great idea. Agree with others that preloved is a good option. What size are you and what are your favorite colors? PSers are great shoppers and may be able to find some more options for you. Sending you a virtual hug.

 

[mizzbutterfly]

I can't express how much your support means to me!! It has certainly been a very difficult (and traumatizing) time. I have a long road ahead of me, and although it seems grim, a bit of a bling won't hurt right?

Im going to try to reply to most of you!

I’m sorry you’re going through this! I’d post on the preloved board, checkout LoupeTroop, and visit local pawn shops. I think you can definitely find something gold and great if you go the preloved route, and I think the idea of giving yourself and a preloved treasure a fresh and fabulous start together is lovely. Best of luck in your search!

I have been checking out LoupeTroop and will continue to keep an eye out. There are not that many pawn shops around me that are easily accessible.

Post this in preloved forum so folks can see what they might be willing to sell you. eBay has lots of options too.

I tried looking on eBay, but I'm too scared to actually pull the trigger. I haven't found any sellers that seem "reputable enough". Let me know if you have any recommendations!

Just by the way - what size are you?

The ring you recommended is so cute! Also, Im a size 5.

im so very sorry, you are going through a rough time. you are likely much better off. probably not a good idea, to make a lifelong commitment, to someone, that will "forcefully" take a ring or anything for that matter, off your person, even in anger.

you will see better days ahead, even if it doesn't feel like it now. that i promise.

fabulous idea to get oneself a "selflove" ring. as the others have suggested already ...
loupetroop, ebay, the preloved ps jewels the secondary market is your best bet to help you get the nicest ring for your budget

im a fan of gold. i wouldn't settle for silver, unless it is what you like

Thank you so much for your kind words . I definitely prefer gold, and only have few silver pieces and those are Tiffany.

Another vote for buying preloved. I would check pawn shops. If it's between the above you posted, I like the Morganite ring, but in gold. The gold version is only $100 more and will last you a lifetime.

Sorry to hear about your broken engagement but good riddance to anyone who would "forcefully" take your ring.

You are right, it isn't that much of a $ difference- but I'm currently stuck in an apartment that I can barely afford by myself right now , so even the $100 makes difference. But perhaps I should wait a little to have a forever piece instead of rush buying something that won't last that long.

(((Hugs))) soooo many hugs.
What a crap sandwich of a situation.
Everybody is right. You are going to come out of this stronger for it, and that's something. I think the symbolism is a lovely thing. I can't wait to see what you find.

THANK YOU! I need all of the hugs and words of encouragement right now!! <3

I’m so sorry you are going through a difficult time. A self love ring sounds like a great idea. Agree with others that preloved is a good option. What size are you and what are your favorite colors? PSers are great shoppers and may be able to find some more options for you. Sending you a virtual hug.

<3 Thank you for the hug!!! I send you a virtual hug right back! Im a size 5; I bought myself a ruby ring for my 30th birthday that I wear every single day. So I'd like a ring that compliments the ruby!

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

I really like the amethyst
Its a nice colour and not engagment ring like
If you like silver i wouldn't count it out, you won't be financially stretched for ever but you need cheering up now !

I'm sorry you had a broken engagement
sometimes life just sux
Hearts do get better eventuality
You will get through this

Have a hug from Tibby

 

[kgizo]

Do you like pearls?

 

[VRBeauty]

I prefer the amethyst, but that may be because I know that’s the color that would look best against my skin tone. Have you tried on rings with any of these stones? I may be wrong, but I’m guessing the morganite is complimentary on a much narrower range of skin tones than the other two stones.

 

[Ladygrey]

Oh gosh, that's so rough, I'm so so sorry. I absolutely second the recommendation to post in preloved - a few of us might have things that we haven't posted that we would consider letting go for a good cause! I have a yellow gold ring with a pear / heart sapphire in an antique-style setting that I've been thinking of selling and I'm sure others have options too. If there was ever an incentive to let something go for a good price, this is it!

 

[pearlsngems]

I just want to say sorry that this happened to you. I agree that you dodged a bullet, and that a self-love ring is a fabulous idea!

I personally know 4 people who had a broken engagement (and 1 more, the son of a friend, whom I didn't know personally) -- all 5 found someone new to love and marry. Have hope! A loving heart finds a way.

 

[Bron357]

Sending hugs, lots of hugs.
Onwards and upwards my dear!
As others have suggested, many of us have rings we no longer wear and would be happy to rehome to a lass who needs a sparkly pick up.
I’ll go through my pile and start a thread in Pre Loved.
I wouldnt recommend gold fill / plate, it wears off really quickly on rings.

 

[Girlfriday17]

Oval Amethyst Diamond Accent Ring | 0.02ctw, 0.70ct | SZ 5.75 |

Metal 10k Yellow Gold Size 5 3/4 Width 2.60 mm Gemstone Single Cut Diamonds, Oval Cut Amethyst Carat 0.02 ctw Diamonds, 0.70 ct Amethyst Clarity I1 Colour I/J

100ways.com

This is from a great canadIan site (so the exchange rate is good for you). I just ordered a ring from here myself. I do live in Canada but I’m pretty sure they will ship to the US.

 

[missy]

I am so sorry for all you are going through @mizzbutterfly and I hope you find just the perfect ring for yourself to mark a new and fresh beginning for a better happier tomorrow. (((Hugs))).

 

[scouty]

So sorry for what you’re going through. I went through a broken engagement myself and found it very hard to get used to not wearing a ring anymore, even though I was the one who initiated the breakup. I bought a pretty diamond and sapphire 7 stone band to wear as a right hand ring and it was so nice to have something sparkly to look at. I soon met my now husband after I started wearing my self-love ring.

The best part is, no one will ever be able to “forceably” take away this self love ring away from you! I really think you’ve dodged a bullet and are so lucky to have had this happen before a wedding or children (that’s what I told myself). Even if it might not feel that way right now, someday you will look back on how strong you were to get through this time and be proud of that strength!

 

[Crazie4Cuts]

Thinking of you and sending big hugs your way. I am sorry for you going through this on top of all the things that are happening now. I do think that if you are wanting a self-love ring and it would help make you smile and think of happier future forward thoughts then by all means go forward in making that purchase. Here’s something I found on Etsy- and in your budget!

Lavender Amethyst Ring 14K Yellow Gold and Argentium Silver - Etsy

This beautiful cushion shape lavender amethyst with checkerboard facets has been set in a stunning 8 prong 14k yellow gold setting with an argentium silver shank and 14k accent beads. The stone measures 9.10X7.00mm and weighs 2.10ct. Please indicate your finger size in the Message to the Seller

www.etsy.com

or how about this ring?

Purple Spinel Ring 14K Yellow Gold and Sterling Silver - Etsy

This Stackable Rings item by danielmjewelry has 57 favorites from Etsy shoppers. Ships from Marblehead, MA. Listed on Dec 10, 2023

www.etsy.com

DanielM are beautiful rings and quality settings/stones. If you have a particular color Ammy you like, I would inquire if he had a color gems of that particular hue. I have found him quite through in his communication when he helped me with a custom ring.

Sending good vibes your way! We are here for YOU!

-C4C

 

[Beautiful-disaster]

I’m sorry you had such a crap experience but like others think he was doing you a favour - because finding out they are a waste of time and energy is much worse further down the track when you have kids and baggage.
I have been looking at this little ring for awhile now..... I know the stone has *everything* wrong with it but it presents well - has natural diamonds and is in gold.
At $225 it’s a good price for a pretty ring to cheer you up so I just thought I might suggest it.
You will find much better quality for your money on LT.

RUBY CERTIFIED 9K White Gold & Diamonds Ring - R A1410

Gold Ruby Rings 7.7 x 9.23 x 4.57mm 2.41 cts Auction #64228 Jewelry Auctioned

www.jewelry-auctioned.com

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

@mizzbutterfly. How you doing today ?

 

[Ally T]

I really like the amethyst
Its a nice colour and not engagment ring like
If you like silver i wouldn't count it out, you won't be financially stretched for ever but you need cheering up now !

I'm sorry you had a broken engagement
sometimes life just sux
Hearts do get better eventuality
You will get through this

Have a hug from Tibby

Tibby has milky chops!

 

[Ally T]

Hi all,

I hope I am posting this in the right forum.
This is a dreadful time for me. My 1.5 year engagement was called off by my ex-fiancé. He was adamant in wanting my e-ring back... and so I gave it to him, well- he actually forcefully took it. Although in the beginning I thought that the setting was too high, I had grown absolutely in love with it. And now, my left hand is empty and I am having a hard time with it; I find myself walking around hiding my left hand.
I think I have come to the conclusion, that as part of my healing process I'd like to buy myself a ring- not an e-ring, but a "self love" ring with a gem/simulated gem or something to wear on my middle finger on my left hand. I'd love a yellow gold band for this, but as you can imagine, the broken engagement has left me in not the greatest financial position. Ideally, I'd like to spend around $200 USD.

Below are a few rings I like, but the yellow gold is a bit out of reach for me:

Morganite Ring

Green Radiant Moissanite Ring

Purple Amethyst

Or do you think I should just settle for silver? Im hesitant to get anything thats gold filled/vermeil because of durability.

Thanks :p

Big hugs to you. Time doesn't make things go away, but just makes them easier to deal with. He didn't deserve you.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Tibby has milky chops!

He likes to keep something for latter on
I choose not to use the picture with the stinky jellymeat

 

[mizzbutterfly]

I really like the amethyst
Its a nice colour and not engagment ring like
If you like silver i wouldn't count it out, you won't be financially stretched for ever but you need cheering up now !

I'm sorry you had a broken engagement
sometimes life just sux
Hearts do get better eventuality
You will get through this

Have a hug from Tibby

Thank you so much for your words. You are right, life sometimes sucks. I hope my heart will eventually become whole again!
Also, I love Tibby and want all the cuddles!!! <3