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need a quick vent!

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bee*

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 14, 2006
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12,170
One of my friends is after mailing a group of us to the pub tonight and I have such a feeling that he''s about to announce that he''s gotten engaged. Not sure why I have this feeling as there''s been no talk about it, but I cant shake it off. What''s annoying me more is my reaction to it. Im happy for them, but I cant stop thinking when will it be my turn (even though I know we''re purchasing the ring in July). Its really annoying me that Im having these thoughts when I should be really happy for them, without this niggle in the back of my mind. When we go to the pub tonight, if they do announce it, Im just really worried that I wont be able to throw myself into their celebrations, and I know that''s really selfish of me. Just the last time one of our group got engaged, I got all the questions about when are myself and bf going to do it, as we''re going out the longest and Im just not in the mood for all those questions tonight as how do you answer them! If we are going to get engaged, we''re going to do it, so stop asking me! Maybe Im blowing the whole thing out of proportions and they mightn''t be engaged at all, but its unusual for us to have pub night on a tuesday, especially since the whole of Ireland have been drinking from Friday through to our Bank Holiday yesterday. Im so annoyed with myself at the moment!
 

JenStone

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 13, 2006
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490
Oh Bee, I know EXACTLY how you feel. My boyfriend and I have been together for more than three and a half years, and it seems to me that every couple who''ve been together for less time than us is getting engaged. And when I hear the news, I can''t help but feel envious and frustrated that it''s not me, yet again. Then there''s the whole process of fending off everyone''s questions on when we''re getting engaged.

Stay strong and I''ll keep my fingers crossed for you that your friend isn''t announcing an engagement after all!
 

bee*

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 14, 2006
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12,170
I know-and I feel terrible saying that I hope they''re not announcing their engagement-I really do! We''re nearly together 8 years at this stage and its driving me mad! I just cant wait until its time to announce our engagement!
 

cherry_vanilla

Rough_Rock
Joined
Nov 28, 2006
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76
I''m not sure which is appropriate - wishing you good luck or them "bad luck" (all a matter of point of view!) I can completely understand - I have had a hard time dealing with my friends getting engaged when I find out from word of mouth or read it online (latest one was only a few days ago, they''re really dropping like flies
) in person is a lot harder to put on your "public face" and not feel instantly hurt.

I don''t suppose there''s any way you can weasel out that info beforehand just so you can know for certain?
 

bee*

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 14, 2006
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12,170
Well Im back from the pub and ......they''re not engaged! Four of us met up beforehand and we were all sure that they were going to announce it, but they didnt.He just wanted to meet up for a chat! Men!
What was nice though was that I mentioned it to D and he totally understood and said yeah well wait until you''re going to be telling them our story in a few months and wait till they see your ring. That made me feel better
.

Cherry, I know what you mean about the public face. I was so afraid that I wouldnt be able to look really happy and I dont want to be like that. Oh well, it didnt happen so I was being all weird for nothing
 

ephemery1

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Mar 20, 2006
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Ugh, I so understand that feeling... I remember before FI and I were engaged, right before we were about to leave for a weekend trip for a friend's wedding, we found out that another good friend-couple of ours had just gotten engaged. I remember it SO clearly... I was standing outside of the Ann Taylor Loft on my campus, and when my then-boyfriend broke the news... I immediately burst into tears. I felt horrible about my reaction, because they were such good friends of ours and I really was happy for them... but UGH... it was just the last thing I could handle hearing at that point in time. All I could envision was spending the upcoming wedding weekend with them and the other recently-engaged couple traveling with us, hearing non-stop engagement talk the entire time. Which is exactly what happened... but I guess I survived.


So glad that didn't end up being the case for you though!!
 

bee*

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 14, 2006
Messages
12,170
Thanks ephemery! Its good to know that other people feel the same cos I felt like such a b**ch for thinking like that!
 

whenharrymetsally

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 21, 2007
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471
Bee,

I can totally understand how you feel! My b/f and I have been together for 8 years also. I''m 34 and he''s 36. I can totally understand how you feel with everybody around getting married/engaged over the last 5 years or so. I think it was 3 years ago that we had 6 weddings to go to..all in the same few months!! and Three of them were in a span of two weeks. I hate myself for saying it..but it was hard not to feel just a teeeny bit jealous, wondering when it will be my turn. We''ve also just ''purchased'' an engagement ring, but it is not yet official either. I''m glad they didn''t end up announcing their engagement tho. Just keep thinking how wonderful it WILL be when you do announce your engagement to everybody! It will all be worth the wait!
 

JenStone

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 13, 2006
Messages
490
I also wanted to add...one of my coworkers just got engaged after just a year of being together. The worst part is, she''s constantly on the phone with family, friends, and vendors, planning the wedding! It''s almost like rubbing salt on an open wound...I want to be happy for her, and I was when I first heard about the engagement, but it just makes me want to scream sometimes!
 

cherry_vanilla

Rough_Rock
Joined
Nov 28, 2006
Messages
76
My lab partner proposed to his LDR girlfriend (of course, together less than my boyfriend and I have been...) over spring break... I should be ok for today''s lab in not turning into a jealous wreck since (hopefully?) guys don''t squeal about getting engaged nearly as much as the lady in the equation, but I sure hope HE doesn''t get the initiative ask ME since spring break, vacation, and the 3 year anniversary mark coincided
 

bee*

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 14, 2006
Messages
12,170
D just rang me from work to say that his good friend in there is after getting engaged! Ive only spoken to the guy a couple of times, so I know that I wont hear about the wedding all the time, but still, another one bites the dust! I know it will be worth the wait when he does propose but time seems to be going so slowly towards july! Im so impatient!
 
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