NANNY CAMS??

[LadyBlue]

Date: 7/23/2009 1:03:07 PM
Author: nycbkgirl

Date: 7/23/2009 12:54:25 PM

Author: TravelingGal

nyc, your nanny would rub me the wrong way. My nanny has NEVER been late. Not once. In the beginning, I told her that she would have to bring her own food. She said fine. I was just glad that she was fine with it - and I''ve provided her with food every day since day 2. But she has NEVER EVER once asked me for something like coffee or whatever if we didn''t have it. If she doesn''t like what we have, she is more than welcome to bring her own.


I would be sitting down with your nanny and discussing expectations. Tardiness is not acceptable. If she was late because your place is new and she got lost, no problem. See how it goes tomorrow.


On the topic of inspiring loyalty, I do suggest employers of nannies take that seriously. As I said, it is tough on kids to have nannies leave and new ones come in. My nanny only works for me 2 days. She has gotten full time offers (from friends of her past employers) since she met me, but she has turned them down because she enjoys working for me. I really appreciate that because it''s hard to find a nanny who will only come in two days a week. Tough to fill those other days.

thanks TGAL- i totally agree about the tardiness and the food..was just wondering if i was the only one

..glad to know that u also established boundries ...i would discuss that but i dont think i like her

...i think today will be her last day. not only bc of the lateness and food (thats not even a factor bc that could be discussed) she doesnt seem interested in the kids and when theres down time she just sits or wants to chat with MIL. i think we need to try another nanny that i thought was nice. i feel bad saying that your services arent needed anymore but luckily my sis is tough as a nail bc im a wuss when it comes to things like that

.

So sorry you did not like the nanny

, I''m glad you have another options. If the kids are sleeping, I will understand that she sits down and chat with MIL, unless you want her staring ar the babys while they sleep

 

[nycbkgirl]

Date: 7/23/2009 1:03:22 PM
Author: butterfly 17

Date: 7/22/2009 10:04:32 PM
Author: nycbkgirl
another note to my situation: DH is in law enforcement and is dead set on a nanny cam...i guess bc of the line of work he is in? and everyone at his job who has a nanny has the cams....so maybe i am trying to justify having one bc dh is forcing it upon me

....in any case i wish i heard from a pro-cam perspective lol...bc i love hearing different sides so i can make an unbiased decision.

Hi,

Just curious, if your husband works nites, then isn''t he home during the day? Like, all day? Albeit, he is probably sleeping, but I am sure he doesn''t sleep the entire day? So, if your MIL is home with the kids and your husband is home, in case of emergencies I am sure she can wake him up, do you really need a nanny as well?

My husband is in law enforcement too and he works nites, we use a babysitter on Sundays and he have never suggested getting a camera. He''s home all day from 8 am to 10:30 pm, and he can hear every time the baby cries, etc. and our sitter knows she can wake him up in case of emergencies. He usually wakes up around 3 pm and the babysitter leaves.

I would think that whoever you hired would be detered to do anything malicious to your kids esp. since your MIL is right there and your husband is there too? Unless he doesn''t sleep at home?

If I were a nanny, I would be extra careful about doing anything if I knew that the parent was in law enforcement and was in the house, even if he was sleeping.

hahaha Butterfly- i make it a point to say my hubby is so and so lol...i would be scared too knowing there was smthg in the bedroom there with him

...maybe its just where he works that they are all about surveillance

...but yes he does come home usually at 230am or if smthg happens he doesnt come home until the next nite

which i hate but it has to be done if u know what i mean. yes before nanny, MIL would wake either me or DH and it got frustrating bc he wasnt getting enough sleep and with a rough job like that it takes a toll on ya...and he never has time to relax, unwind or even watch tv...he usually is up by 2 or 3pm and off to work at 430...so its hard....oh and when he comes home he takes over duties so i can get some sleep or relax too...which means if babies are up at 5 or 6 then he only gets 2 or 3 hrs then and whatever else during the day.its just so much more complicated with twins

 

[Bia]

Date: 7/23/2009 12:27:20 PM
Author: nycbkgirl

i agree and i have no problem with eating brkfst ..my situation isnt formal either but i would feel akward on my first day asking my employers for food right off the bat...maybe once we got to know eachother it woul be diff. my kids dont have brkfst so its not like they can do it together lol.

Agreed. Not a great first impression. She should have also been on time, particularly for the first day, barring extreme circumstances--which to be honest, unless it was a real emergency, she should have been on time. If you don't know where you're going, or you anticipate traffic, then you should leave early--that's the rule of thumb right?

The thing about nanny jobs is, families count on you to be there. Their whole day depends on your being there, so reliability is very important. If your nanny can't be on time for day one, then that's not a good sign--but she may surprise you, and this was just a fluke (I hope). I think I only called out sick once, maybe twice, in my 6 years as a nanny--but I don't like calling out to begin with. Of course, emergencies happen (family, car trouble, etc) but as long as those things aren't reacurring, it's okay.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Date: 7/23/2009 11:57:03 AM
Author: nycbkgirl
thanks TAC..always love your opinions too!...i wouldnt consider daycare until they were at least 2 or if we had no other choice. i rather them be in the comfort of their own home (and minus other sickly kids of course)...i def can take care of my kids on my own..but i mentioned before that i wanna slowly start returning to work and cooking and cleaning again lol...so it really cant be done without the help. its really not that i dont feel safe..its just a matter of whether this person is good enough to take care of my babies. i dont know this person and i need to have that control in the beginning.

Well that is a different story though! I just remember reading how this has been a tough adjustment on you. My close friend has twins AND an older son and is super mom for sure. She does it all herself (minus working outside of the home). She is VERY domestic (unlike me)!

It is very hard to trust a stranger with your child(ren). Honestly I wouldn''t even know WHERE to look for a qualified nanny. I had enough trouble finding a babysitter which is why I went 15 months w/o one! I also understand wanting to keep them away from daycare for health reasons. Just wanted to throw that idea out there if you really can''t find someone you like and do want to work more.

I also agree this new nanny is NOT starting off on a good foot. Where did you get her name?

 

[nycbkgirl]

Date: 7/23/2009 1:06:33 PM
Author: gaby06
Did she apologize for being late? Leaving in the city i know that sometimes you get trap in the subway, the bus is late or so many factors. But being late the first day, she should explain her self.

At what time did she start working? If she start at 10.00 am and ask for breakfast, thats a bit to much, but if start at 7 or 7.30 well, she is leaving her house around 6.30, so I understand that.

If the babys were sleeping, I understand why she had breakfast right away, so she will be ready when the kids wake up, if the kids were awake, then, I will be thinking if is the right nanny

Hey Gaby

she did start at 7 so it is understandable that she wanted brkfst in a way but on the other hand, when i started work at 7 or 8...i woke up earlier and had my time planned out for shower, dressing, and brkfst etc...i would never come and start eating at work

ESP first day

when i went to JJC in the city, i started class at 815 ...i wanted to drive so i left my house at 5am! i had enough time to avoid traffic, eat and doze off a little...so im saying isnt there so responsibility involved and starting early shouldnt be an excuse?..never has been with me.

if the babies are sleeping she should ask at least if anything else needs to be done...i mean with babies there is A LOT of down time (well maybe not with my daughter lol..she has insomnia lol)...so it just seemed im paying her (a pretty penny) to be hanging out and chilling with MIL and getting the latest gossip lol

it still stresses me that a stranger is taking care of my babies...maybe im not ready for this afterall

...if they were older maybe i wouldnt be so bothered. ?

 

[nycbkgirl]

o and she did not explain her lateness when my sis asked she said she got here at 7 LOL..maybe her watch is broken

...o wait she doesnt have one...she told me i should get a clock on my wall LOL.

 

[makemepretty]

Oh gosh, this is such a pet peeve of mine. My sister has a little boy and was mentioning getting a nanny cam if she hires a baby sitter. I think someone should be told if they will be videotaped. I feel if you need to "hide" a camera and not tell the person, then watch your child YOURSELF. If you have doubts about the person watching your child then don''t use them!!!! The daycare my niece and nephew go to have cameras that you can log onto and see your kid whenever you want. As long as the person knows there''s a camera, that''s fine. To me, when you do something without the persons knowledge that makes you the dishonest individual and says a lot about YOUR character. I''d want someone to be honest with me so I''d be honest with them, it''s a trust issue, especially with something as valuable as a child.

 

[nycbkgirl]

Date: 7/23/2009 1:17:14 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring

Date: 7/23/2009 11:57:03 AM
Author: nycbkgirl
thanks TAC..always love your opinions too!...i wouldnt consider daycare until they were at least 2 or if we had no other choice. i rather them be in the comfort of their own home (and minus other sickly kids of course)...i def can take care of my kids on my own..but i mentioned before that i wanna slowly start returning to work and cooking and cleaning again lol...so it really cant be done without the help. its really not that i dont feel safe..its just a matter of whether this person is good enough to take care of my babies. i dont know this person and i need to have that control in the beginning.

Well that is a different story though! I just remember reading how this has been a tough adjustment on you. My close friend has twins AND an older son and is super mom for sure. She does it all herself (minus working outside of the home). She is VERY domestic (unlike me)!

It is very hard to trust a stranger with your child(ren). Honestly I wouldn''t even know WHERE to look for a qualified nanny. I had enough trouble finding a babysitter which is why I went 15 months w/o one! I also understand wanting to keep them away from daycare for health reasons. Just wanted to throw that idea out there if you really can''t find someone you like and do want to work more.

I also agree this new nanny is NOT starting off on a good foot. Where did you get her name?

LOL...saaaame over this way !

we got her from an agency that someone referred us to and we interviewed her and we agreed to give it a try bc she seemed nice and friendly and was good with the kids that day. u never know until u try them out and see how they are a whole day with them

 

[nycbkgirl]

Date: 7/23/2009 1:13:29 PM
Author: Bia

Date: 7/23/2009 12:27:20 PM
Author: nycbkgirl

i agree and i have no problem with eating brkfst ..my situation isnt formal either but i would feel akward on my first day asking my employers for food right off the bat...maybe once we got to know eachother it woul be diff. my kids dont have brkfst so its not like they can do it together lol.

Agreed. Not a great first impression. She should have also been on time, particularly for the first day, barring extreme circumstances--which to be honest, unless it was a real emergency, she should have been on time. If you don''t know where you''re going, or you anticipate traffic, then you should leave early--that''s the rule of thumb right?

The thing about nanny jobs is, families count on you to be there. Their whole day depends on your being there, so reliability is very important. If your nanny can''t be on time for day one, then that''s not a good sign--but she may surprise you, and this was just a fluke (I hope). I think I only called out sick once, maybe twice, in my 6 years as a nanny--but I don''t like calling out to begin with. Of course, emergencies happen (family, car trouble, etc) but as long as those things aren''t reacurring, it''s okay.

agreed. on all counts!

 

[nycbkgirl]

Date: 7/23/2009 1:29:13 PM
Author: makemepretty
Oh gosh, this is such a pet peeve of mine. My sister has a little boy and was mentioning getting a nanny cam if she hires a baby sitter. I think someone should be told if they will be videotaped. I feel if you need to ''hide'' a camera and not tell the person, then watch your child YOURSELF. If you have doubts about the person watching your child then don''t use them!!!! The daycare my niece and nephew go to have cameras that you can log onto and see your kid whenever you want. As long as the person knows there''s a camera, that''s fine. To me, when you do something without the persons knowledge that makes you the dishonest individual and says a lot about YOUR character. I''d want someone to be honest with me so I''d be honest with them, it''s a trust issue, especially with something as valuable as a child.

i will have doubts with ppl i even love! i cant stress this enough ...U CANNOT trust someone that u DO NOT know...even if they seem so wonderful and great! you are trusting them with your LIFE in essence..thats a pretty big deal !! and as i have said before nannies should assume that they are always being taped whether told or not! everythings fine with my character as im sure is with urs

thanks for your non-judgmental perspective

 

[Bia]

If you don''t like her off the bat, don''t feel bad about replacing her. Sometimes it just doesn''t work out and that''s fine.

Just out of curiosity, do you have cleaning expectations of your nanny? I didn''t clean, but I did pick up after myself and the kids (my charges weren''t babies so we''d clean up together). If I made lunch, I cleaned it up, Or I would empty the dishwasher, straighten up, things like that...but that''s about it. Some nannies are stictly childcare (I was) and others are do housecleaning and childcare. I''m assuming you discussed that prior, but if you didn''t definintely make sure you get your expectations out on the table.

Since you have infants, there will be down time, so I don''t necessairly see anything wrong with sitting down to talk shop with your MIL...she may be trying to get comfortable? What would you have her do instead?

 

[nycbkgirl]

Date: 7/23/2009 1:35:13 PM
Author: Bia
If you don''t like her off the bat, don''t feel bad about replacing her. Sometimes it just doesn''t work out and that''s fine.

Just out of curiosity, do you have cleaning expectations of your nanny? I didn''t clean, but I did pick up after myself and the kids (my charges weren''t babies so we''d clean up together). If I made lunch, I cleaned it up, Or I would empty the dishwasher, straighten up, things like that...but that''s about it. Some nannies are stictly childcare (I was) and others are do housecleaning and childcare. I''m assuming you discussed that prior, but if you didn''t definintely make sure you get your expectations out on the table.

Since you have infants, there will be down time, so I don''t necessairly see anything wrong with sitting down to talk shop with your MIL...she may be trying to get comfortable? What would you have her do instead?

thats all i ask as well and washing and preparing the baby bottles...i dont mind her talkin to MIL but it seemed like thats what she was more interested in than the kids

...and maybe i did want her to sit outside even while jackie slept (bc she has a tendency to start screamin and waking prety fast)..point is she never asked should i sit with her or should i do smthg else..thats the point that bothers me the most.

 

[lucyandroger]

nycbkgirl, I''m sorry this nanny isn''t working out for you. If you''re not comfortable with her, you don''t even need a reason, find another nanny. I''m not sure how you found this nanny, but several of my female colleagues have gone through this agency with great results http://www.teachercare.com/. These nannies are professionals (with teaching degrees) and expect to be paid/treated as such though.

As far as your nanny''s first day, I think it is quite strange that she had breakfast and asked for coffee first thing after showing up late. That would have rubbed me the wrong way as well. However, I think talking to your MIL would be expected - they are going to be working together so I would think it was strange if they didn''t try to get to know each other on the first day.

I think that first and foremost you need to communicate with this or a new nanny. If you don''t want her eating breakfast at your house, have a conversation about it. If you expect her to help out around the house when the babies are asleep, tell her that. You can''t expect her to read your mind. I know you probably want to keep things informal but a little nanny contract that outlines each other''s expectations would be a good idea. I think that this contract should also say that you may in the future install nanny cams so that everyone is on the same page.

Another thing, you mentioned hiring a nanny so that you could have more time cooking and cleaning. Have you thought about hiring someone to cook and clean instead and taking care of the twins yourself? Maybe it would be easire to relinquish some control on the cleaning front instead of the raising your children front. Just throwing it out there.

I hope you find someone awesome that you can build a relationship of mutual trust and respect with!

 

[swingirl]

Your nanny''s first-day behavior throws up red flags for me. People are on their best behavior the first day of work. She should not be asking you for food until she''s offered. She isn''t your guest. She should have at least acknowledged she was late. And coming to work and needing to eat first thing is just rude. She could have wolfed down her fruit in the car.

My friend had twins and during the day (she was self employed and worked at home) she had a woman come in to look after the babies. The nanny stayed with the babies all day; she fed them, walked them, changed them, played with them and read her book or watched TV when they were asleep. Her job was not as a housekeeper so she didn''t cook and clean. She was there to take care of the twins and was with them 100%. She brought her own lunch and never helped herself to food, because if you are in the kitchen digging through the frig you aren''t with the babies.

Your situation is obviously very different because you''ve got 2 people. I wouldn''t be surprised if your MIL takes over the babies and lets the nanny do the housework.

 

[mia1181]

NYCBK- I''m sorry if you were feeling attacked. I said a few times that I am not opposed to a nanny cam. I just do not understand why it needs to be hidden....I am just giving you the perspective of a nanny. You say you are looking for a parent that has a nanny cam''s perspective, but then you say you already know a bunch of them IRL. But how many nannies do you know?

There are also a lot of "bad employers" out there too. There are actually people that pay their live-in nanny $200 a week and then have them work all week long, 12 hour days. There are employers who refuse to pay a nanny back pay if she resigns (very very common). I belong to a nanny message board and we have a lot of young, inexperienced nannies asking for advice on how to deal with a lot of these issues where their employer doesn''t allow vacation time or other mistreatments that you would not find in a typical workplace.

Not saying you will be a bad employer NYCBK, in fact I laugh everytime you call a nanny a "stranger" because I realize you are just new to this and you won''t be strangers for long. The mother/nanny relationship is (can be) a beautiful thing. You will be close to her in ways that you never imagined. Yes she is employee first and foremost, but she is also going to be another person loving your children as much as you do. You will see that in a lot of ways she will become so important to you because you share this common bond of raising these children. But then again I am talking about a nanny here. Babysitters don''t raise the children and I''m not sure which one you are actually hiring. It might start as a babysitter and progress to a nanny position too.

As for the question about whether I see "bad nannies" out in public. Of course! It is the same thing Bia described... Not paying close attention to the children, talking on the phone. But most of the time these are also illegal immigrants, who are not paying taxes. I can''t stress enough that if you are looking for a bargain in childcare you probably will not find anything good. If you are paying similar costs to daycare for a nanny and don''t want to pay taxes, you just aren''t going to find someone amazing (well you could get lucky and find someone who doesn''t know her "worth"). Nannies are very much a privilege for the wealthy, it''s very expensive to hire a legitimate employee in your home. Again, this is not directed at you NYC... just employers in general.

In big cities like New York and here in SF there is an elitist attitude among some employers where they like to call their Part-Time Babysitter, a Nanny. It''s like a status thing. And then many of them get together and complain about how "lazy" their nanny is our whatever. Perhaps the nannies actually are, but why not fire them then if they are so horrible? It is very common to treat nannies like household help. Like a gardner or housekeeper. It gives people a reason to act liken they are so wealthy and powerful. And parents always use the "my children are my most prized possession" speech whenever they want to put down a nanny. But if your children are really your most prized possession, wouldn''t you want to find the best individual to take care of them? Wouldn''t you want to respect that person?

As for the nanny you''ve hired NYCBK, no that certainly is not a good first impression at all. I''d be just as put off as you. But please don''t complain about all nannies because the one you have hired is not great. Arriving late to work on the first day is a MAJOR RED FLAG. You need to rely on this person to be on time... Also I don''t know how many hours she is working for you in a day. If I am there all day I of course need to eat on the job. Most employers provide food, but if I don''t like what they have then I buy my own. But getting there and right away eating breakfast is odd. I don''t get hungry for breakfast until about 9, but I start work at 7:30 so I do eat later. And complaining that she didn''t like your food is not a good sign either. That is why I mentioned earlier that you do a "trial period" or a "working interview" before officially hiring a girl. They come and you pay them for their time, but there is an understand that you can part ways if it doesn''t work out.

The next thing that you want to do is sit down with her and fill out a nanny contract. This is a great way to make sure she understands exactly what is expected of her. You can also decide to charge her a late fee for coming late and then charge yourself a late fee for coming home late also to be fair. Anyway it''s good to get that out of the way so you both know what you are getting in to.

Some books you might like to check out:
The Nanny Diaries (There''s also a movie)- this is obviously the extreme exagerration. The employer is outrageous and the nanny does some things I don''t agree with also. But it tackles a bunch of real issues and hey it''s entertaining too!

The Perfect Stranger: The Truth About Mothers and Nannies- I haven''t read this one in a while but I think it was pretty fair to both nannies and employers. There are horror stories about things that parents caught on nanny cams, but also an analysis of the complex nanny/mother relationship that I liked.

Anyway, as you can see I can go on for days.

I''ll shut up now! I really hope that you don''t think I am attacking you or judging you... I just think a lot of your fears could be addressed by hiring the right person AND getting a nanny cam if that''s what you want.

 

[mia1181]

Date: 7/23/2009 1:46:03 PM
Author: nycbkgirl
thats all i ask as well and washing and preparing the baby bottles...i dont mind her talkin to MIL but it seemed like thats what she was more interested in than the kids

...and maybe i did want her to sit outside even while jackie slept (bc she has a tendency to start screamin and waking prety fast)..point is she never asked should i sit with her or should i do smthg else..thats the point that bothers me the most.

This is not looking good. Honestly, trust your gut and let her go....

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 7/23/2009 2:03:12 PM
Author: mia1181

Not saying you will be a bad employer NYCBK, in fact I laugh everytime you call a nanny a ''stranger'' because I realize you are just new to this and you won''t be strangers for long. The mother/nanny relationship is (can be) a beautiful thing. You will be close to her in ways that you never imagined. Yes she is employee first and foremost, but she is also going to be another person loving your children as much as you do. You will see that in a lot of ways she will become so important to you because you share this common bond of raising these children. But then again I am talking about a nanny here. Babysitters don''t raise the children and I''m not sure which one you are actually hiring. It might start as a babysitter and progress to a nanny position too.

You made good points mia, but I disagree with the above. Nannies who think they love their charges as much as the mothers do are kidding themselves! And I wouldn''t EXPECT my nanny to love my daughter as much as I do. That is asking a lot.

I''m sure it was semantics, but it struck me so I am just putting my two cents in.

 

[mia1181]

Date: 7/23/2009 2:25:47 PM
Author: TravelingGal

Date: 7/23/2009 2:03:12 PM
Author: mia1181

Not saying you will be a bad employer NYCBK, in fact I laugh everytime you call a nanny a ''stranger'' because I realize you are just new to this and you won''t be strangers for long. The mother/nanny relationship is (can be) a beautiful thing. You will be close to her in ways that you never imagined. Yes she is employee first and foremost, but she is also going to be another person loving your children as much as you do. You will see that in a lot of ways she will become so important to you because you share this common bond of raising these children. But then again I am talking about a nanny here. Babysitters don''t raise the children and I''m not sure which one you are actually hiring. It might start as a babysitter and progress to a nanny position too.

You made good points mia, but I disagree with the above. Nannies who think they love their charges as much as the mothers do are kidding themselves! And I wouldn''t EXPECT my nanny to love my daughter as much as I do. That is asking a lot.

I''m sure it was semantics, but it struck me so I am just putting my two cents in.

Yes semantics. But good point, okay not quite as much. But I think you get my idea here. In my case I have two charges who I have been with 50 hours a week for 3.5 years. Since my youngest charge was 2 months old. I am not their mother, nor am I trying to be. But I can tell you I do love these girls so much. I have been there for every memory. My younger charge is like a little mini-me and talk like I do a lot. It is a very special relationship... okay so you got me, more of an Aunt relationship... but an Aunt who was there for the first steps, first tooth, etc. etc.....

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 7/23/2009 2:38:41 PM
Author: mia1181

Date: 7/23/2009 2:25:47 PM
Author: TravelingGal

Date: 7/23/2009 2:03:12 PM
Author: mia1181

Not saying you will be a bad employer NYCBK, in fact I laugh everytime you call a nanny a ''stranger'' because I realize you are just new to this and you won''t be strangers for long. The mother/nanny relationship is (can be) a beautiful thing. You will be close to her in ways that you never imagined. Yes she is employee first and foremost, but she is also going to be another person loving your children as much as you do. You will see that in a lot of ways she will become so important to you because you share this common bond of raising these children. But then again I am talking about a nanny here. Babysitters don''t raise the children and I''m not sure which one you are actually hiring. It might start as a babysitter and progress to a nanny position too.

You made good points mia, but I disagree with the above. Nannies who think they love their charges as much as the mothers do are kidding themselves! And I wouldn''t EXPECT my nanny to love my daughter as much as I do. That is asking a lot.

I''m sure it was semantics, but it struck me so I am just putting my two cents in.

Yes semantics. But good point, okay not quite as much. But I think you get my idea here. In my case I have two charges who I have been with 50 hours a week for 3.5 years. Since my youngest charge was 2 months old. I am not their mother, nor am I trying to be. But I can tell you I do love these girls so much. I have been there for every memory. My younger charge is like a little mini-me and talk like I do a lot. It is a very special relationship... okay so you got me, more of an Aunt relationship... but an Aunt who was there for the first steps, first tooth, etc. etc.....

I figured it was semantics.

My nanny adores my daughter. She''s just so excited to see her and never is in a rush to leave. Your family is lucky to have you. Good help (as we can see from nyc''s first nanny) is very hard to find.

 

[LadyBlue]

I don''t like your first nanny choice, I would keep looking. The only think I will suggest for your next nanny, it''s to make a list of all her duties, then is easer for her to know what to do when the kids are sleeping, and if after finish with her duties, there is some time to relax, let her relax, because when the kids are awake, it''s not an easy job.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

I don''t think it is wrong to allow your nanny downtime when the babies are sleeping. After all it is exhausting dealing with babies all day and she deserves a break. I wouldn''t look at it as paying her to do nothing. You are paying for the package. KWIM? I don''t stop paying my babysitter once T goes to bed. She is providing a service. A *VALUABLE* service and so I *value* her. Sounds like this nanny is just the wrong fit.

TGal, one of my babysitters calls T her granddaughter and always says "I love you" when she leaves. It freaked me out at first but now I think it is sweet. We all want caregivers that love and protect our kids. Sounds like your nanny rocks BTW!

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 7/23/2009 4:43:20 PM
Author: Tacori E-ring
I don''t think it is wrong to allow your nanny downtime when the babies are sleeping. After all it is exhausting dealing with babies all day and she deserves a break. I wouldn''t look at it as paying her to do nothing. You are paying for the package. KWIM? I don''t stop paying my babysitter once T goes to bed. She is providing a service. A *VALUABLE* service and so I *value* her. Sounds like this nanny is just the wrong fit.

TGal, one of my babysitters calls T her granddaughter and always says ''I love you'' when she leaves. It freaked me out at first but now I think it is sweet. We all want caregivers that love and protect our kids. Sounds like your nanny rocks BTW!

You''re right on Tacori.

When my nanny first started working for us, she did more cleaning than she does now. I obviously didn''t care that she took lunch to sit, relax, eat, watch TV or whatever. But Amelia sleeps for hours a time on a nap. Sometimes up to 3 hours.

During that time, my nanny is happy to do something if I ask her (we agreed upon me hiring her the types of cleaning she is happy to do) but most days she is content to sit on the couch and watch TV. (she does tidy up, btw, so it''s not like she''s some sort of sloth!)

I admit, it bothered me at first. I hire her for 7 hours, 3 of which she can often be doing nothing. I was discussing this with TGuy and he simply asked, did you hire a nanny or a cleaner?

It never bothered me again.

 

[nycbkgirl]

Quick post ..doin mani pedi...

Tac- I guess I should have clarified...the down time was almost as soon as she came lol...like 830...I would give all the down time possible after things are done etc ...and not on ur first day...I mean cmon what happened to making a good impression ?? Also it wasn''t the down time itself as much as her not asking what else needs to be done or if she should sit with her outside even if jackie was sleeping. That''s still down time but outside while jackie slept.

Will get to everyone later...

Mia- awesome post! That was really helpful and insightful!...I wasn''t feeling attacked...was kidding around...I welcome perpectives and opinions just wanted some pro cam ppl to speak up...more later

Btw....nanny was holdin jackie on the rocking swing on balcony and they were BOth sleeping...nanny fell asleep holding her!...o man how I didn''t lose my temper!...gave her money for the day and will call later and let her know it didn''t work out...I couldn''t tell her in person bc I left early and im a chicken anyway.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 7/23/2009 5:29:49 PM
Author: nycbkgirl
Quick post ..doin mani pedi...

Tac- I guess I should have clarified...the down time was almost as soon as she came lol...like 830...I would give all the down time possible after things are done etc ...and not on ur first day...I mean cmon what happened to making a good impression ?? Also it wasn''t the down time itself as much as her not asking what else needs to be done or if she should sit with her outside even if jackie was sleeping. That''s still down time but outside while jackie slept.

Will get to everyone later...

Mia- awesome post! That was really helpful and insightful!...I wasn''t feeling attacked...was kidding around...I welcome perpectives and opinions just wanted some pro cam ppl to speak up...more later

Btw....nanny was holdin jackie on the rocking swing on balcony and they were BOth sleeping...nanny fell asleep holding her!...o man how I didn''t lose my temper!...gave her money for the day and will call later and let her know it didn''t work out...I couldn''t tell her in person bc I left early and im a chicken anyway.

Where''d you find this winner?

 

[packrat]

Is this an adult? Does she have kids or ever worked with them before? Sure doesn''t sound like she has much experience or gave much thought to what she was doing!

 

[nycbkgirl]

TGAL- see u never know...they are strangers in the beginning and u never know who they are until u witness it for urself!...I found her at an agency and interviewed her and liked her ..but how much can u know from an interview of someone who wants u to like them. I did check references but maybe those parents weren''t home and didn''t have a cam and therefore thought she was great :-I
Ur avi was makin me laff ova here at the salon...very original

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 7/23/2009 5:43:18 PM
Author: nycbkgirl
TGAL- see u never know...they are strangers in the beginning and u never know who they are until u witness it for urself!...I found her at an agency and interviewed her and liked her ..but how much can u know from an interview of someone who wants u to like them. I did check references but maybe those parents weren''t home and didn''t have a cam and therefore thought she was great :-I
Ur avi was makin me laff ova here at the salon...very original

nyc, one of my first questions to the nanny was "are you punctual?" I also asked her quesions on what she expected in terms of food provisions, etc.

So I would have to say, are you asking those types of questions?

 

[LadyBlue]

You need a new nanny asap.

 

[mia1181]

Oh dear.... Not good at all.

I don''t have time to type, but I just want to say we will get you someone better next go around!!!! You need to grill these people in the interview and will have much better luck in the future. TONS of questions in the interview... we can help you come up with some good ones, then pick your top 3 applicants or whatever and then have them come for phase two of the interview. This time you will pay them (you could always negotiate a lower rate for the trial but might be nice to offer full wages for the day) to come in and work just like today, except you won''t have to fire them afterward, because they never had the job to begin with! If you go this route I can promise you there will be less surprises. Everyone puts on a good act for the interview but I really think peoples true colors start to show not long after landing the job. Gotta run!

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 7/23/2009 6:16:55 PM
Author: mia1181
Oh dear.... Not good at all.

I don''t have time to type, but I just want to say we will get you someone better next go around!!!! You need to grill these people in the interview and will have much better luck in the future. TONS of questions in the interview... we can help you come up with some good ones, then pick your top 3 applicants or whatever and then have them come for phase two of the interview. This time you will pay them (you could always negotiate a lower rate for the trial but might be nice to offer full wages for the day) to come in and work just like today, except you won''t have to fire them afterward, because they never had the job to begin with! If you go this route I can promise you there will be less surprises. Everyone puts on a good act for the interview but I really think peoples true colors start to show not long after landing the job. Gotta run!

I agree...we need to see what kind of questions you''ve been asking and then can perhaps beef up your list with more.