Men wearing wedding band as engagement symbol

[emme313]

What do you think of the idea of men wearing a ring symbolizing their engagement? My mom is from Holland and I know that they have a practice of the man wearing his wedding band on the other hand and then switching it when they are actually married. I have a few friends who have been following the new trend of men wearing their chosen wedding band on their right hand to symbolize the engagmenet. Has anyon here done that? And what do the guys think of this?

 

[rms]

Many cultures have that tradition and I know many men who have done that, including members of my own family. I think it is a pretty cool tradition.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

In my honest opinion I think its weird (I am sure others would disagree). If I saw a man with a ring on his right hand I would have NO IDEA that he was engaged. I would think he was just wearing a ring. I personally like the idea of putting on our w-bands at the same time not him wearing his for x number of months before hand.
Just my $.02

 

[Jelly]

That''s funny because my fiance wants to get his wedding band now and wear it so he can join in on the fun of wearing a ring. Or at least that''s what he says! He has Dutch heritage, but I don''t know if he is aware of this tradition.

 

[tawn]

We purchased my husband''s original band close to a year before we got married because gold was cheaper in Italy and he found one he liked, and he wore it on his left the whole time. It seemed like the natural thing to do....we were living together and felt commited enough! He just recently upgraded to a titanium band after 13 years of wear and tear on the other one, and seems to like it pretty well!

 

[Tybee]

This is very funny, because I have really been thinking about this since we got engaged last November. I wear this symbol to tell the word that I am taken...but he wears nothing? I think it would really just seem more even if we both wore engagement rings, it probably won''t happen with us, but is somethingi to think about.

 

[MissAva]

I would be okay with him wearing a diffrent ring, but not his wedding ring. That just me though.

 

[Rockchick]

Date: 9/17/2005 4:22:24 PM
Author:emme313
What do you think of the idea of men wearing a ring symbolizing their engagement? My mom is from Holland and I know that they have a practice of the man wearing his wedding band on the other hand and then switching it when they are actually married. I have a few friends who have been following the new trend of men wearing their chosen wedding band on their right hand to symbolize the engagmenet. Has anyon here done that? And what do the guys think of this?

I''m from Holland and never heard that one before.. never seen it either. I know that women used to do that, but that''s a very old old tradition, I think it has to do with religion (protestant) but not sure. E-rings are not common in Holland (unfortunately) and definately not for men...

I bought my hubby''s ring as a suprise (we were suppose to buy his ring together)had it engraved with our names and weddingdate and he had it around his neck on a gold chain untill we got married, thought that was cute..

 

[sistagrl2004]

My man wears a ring I gave him on his right hand.. but not as an "engagement" ring. I had never seen titanium in person so I ordered a play ring for him on ebay ($15). He''s been wearing it every since. Several people have asked if he was "engaged" before we even got engaged.. He''s not wearing THE band until he says " I do"

 

[MelissaSue]

My honey doesn''t wear a ring, but I think its a nice idea. I wish there was a way to make it distinguishable between an engagement ring and a wedding band like it is for girls. My friends fiance got an engagement band. It is one of those titatinum bands with the anondized color on them. So it looks not quite like a normal wedding band.

 

[Gale]

My FI was wearing around the sample wax I had done for size and fit until it cracked on Saturday. It lasted almost 2 whole weeks. He is so excited about this whole thing that I have gone back to my benchman to have him make a thinner band to coordinate with his wedding ring. I plan on giving this to him to wear as an engagement ring as soon as it''s ready. He really wants to wear his wedding ring as soon as its done, but I would prefer he does not see the final product until the actual time comes. He will be thrilled to have his own engagement ring.

 

[VuittonGal]

I''ve only heard of this one other time. I thought it was a little odd, but that''s just me. Plus, you''re talking to a girl who already booked her reception site and photographer and her engagement ring isn''t coming till this Thursday, so you might not want to go by me! lol!

 

[codex57]

Date: 9/18/2005 12:34:07 AM
Author: Jelly
That''s funny because my fiance wants to get his wedding band now and wear it so he can join in on the fun of wearing a ring. Or at least that''s what he says! He has Dutch heritage, but I don''t know if he is aware of this tradition.

I''m not Dutch, but I was willing to do it. Shoot, I spent all that money on her ring. Why can''t I have something shiny to wear as well? It''s not like I''m trying to hide that I''m off the market or anything.

 

[MissAva]

My SO is dutch (VanDerveer

) but he had never heard of this and neither had any of the Dutch on my side of the family...

 

[Kaylyn]

Bumping an old topic, but my fiancee wears a ring on his left hand as an engagement ring. It was a cheap gold band (about $65, I believe) that I got him, but it''s pretty. He will get to wear his new band (stainless steel) when we get married next year.

My thought on the topic was something mentioned by someone else...why should I be "marked" and not him? Especially since we are in a long distance relationship...it''s nice to know he''s got a symbol of our commitment as well.

People ask him if he''s married all the time. Not that I mind...

 

[codex57]

I had a pre-engagement band that I wore for a while. Yes, PRE engagement. I''m still unsure of the exact purpose of that, but it did reassure my MIL. Whatever. She''s an awesome MIL and it''s not like I had anything to hide so it was no big deal to me.

 

[selflove]

Date: 9/18/2005 10:46:39 AM
Author: Tybee
This is very funny, because I have really been thinking about this since we got engaged last November. I wear this symbol to tell the word that I am taken...but he wears nothing? I think it would really just seem more even if we both wore engagement rings, it probably won''t happen with us, but is somethingi to think about.

That''s funny b/c in college I extolled the theory that e-rings were just a part of male-dominated culture that bound a woman to man and the ring was a macho sign of "hands-off my woman". And I refused to EVER wear such an unfeminist piece of jewelry. Ha! Now I just wish I had more and bigger diamonds on that ring!

 

[FireGoddess]

My BIL is in Holland and they wear their wedding bands on their right hand there.

Personally, if a man''s wearing a ring on the 4th finger of either hand that looks like a band, I assume he''s married until I hear otherwise.

 

[Logan Sapphire]

My husband wore his wedding ring on his right hand before we were married. He was excited by wearing a ring and said it didn''t make it feel less special when we actually got married. I guess each to their own!

 

[plantationcatt]

Love this topic!
For our first year anniversary, he got me a promise ring of our birthstones cut into hearts (it didn''t fit, one of the stones fell out and had to be replaced, and I didn''t particularly like it, so it didn''t get worn much, but he was a-okay because he knew it wasn''t him I didn''t like.)
Soon after, I bought him a cheap silver band to wear on his right hand, which slipped off and got lost. (It''s really a good thing we don''t believe in signs like this.)
So, that was replaced with a nicer (but under 40) sterling band which I had engraved with "I promise" on the inside. He wears this everyday, and has for three years, and will continue to wear on his right hand after we get married.
It''s not so much a symbol to the rest of the world that we''re engaged, just a daily reminder of the life we will share together in marriage. he loves it when people ask him about it though, because he can tell them all about our relationship and whatnot.
So, that''s our whole convoluded story!

 

[sydneycasandra]

Hmm... DH picked out his wedding band (with me there of course!) and *really* likes it. Not blingy, just a big thick chunk of 14K WG that is satin finished on the top, shiny on the sides, and is thicker on the top than bottom for comfort while still allowing a big ring (not signet-style just a gentle taper.) He wanted to wear it SO badly before the wedding but I absolutely refused, except for ONE DAY in the grocery store!

I see people's points about the girl getting to wear a sign of her unavailability but the guy not; however, just think if all our hubbies wanted engagement rings; less $$$ for ours!

ETA: Er, I forgot to say half of what I had to say. I am personally not keen on the guy e-ring idea, maybe just because I'm such a sucker for tradition when it comes to these things, but also partly because it starts to get confusing. The tradition in American society is women w/ erings + wbands, men w/ wbands, and I guess I use those as clues to people's marital status. Also, at least in the part of the country where I live, men OR women wearing wedding-band type ring on their RIGHT ring finger is usuallly used to signify the fact that they are committed in a life-long partner relationship with someone of the same sex. Which is a great idea, but perhaps not the social clue your fiance wants to give off.