Low libido...what''s wrong with me? *clean*

[vespergirl]

Are you on birth control pills? A friend of mine said that they affected her that way (no sex drive), and her dr. confirmed that''s a common side effect.

I was always a very high libido person, but after 4 years with my husband, the excitement can fade from time to time. It''s nothing that a romantic dinner date & a few glasses of wine can''t fix, but we''re down from having sex every day (our first year together) to about once or twice a week, with a toddler at home. I think that passing time, familiarity and a small child in the house can do that to a relationship.

This may not be the most popular viewpoint, but I find that sometimes if I''m not in the mood, I just let him start "doing his thing", and after a few minutes of kissing & stuff I do get in the mood, so sometimes it''s worth it to try to get into it, and you''ll find that your body will soon follow.

 

[vespergirl]

Date: 6/18/2008 9:30:19 PM
Author: LAJennifer

Date: 6/18/2008 5:39:11 PM
Author: appletini
Amber, I have joked with him that I''m going to start keeping a sex calendar so that he can see how infrequent it really is...its like once a month if I''m lucky, and everytime it does happen I''m like OMG, what if that was the last time ever...I''m 28 and I''m never going to have sex again.

Gosh, I totally know how you feel.

I think that several of us are going to have to start a PS support group on this topic ...

 

[BriBee]

Just chiming in to say again that you''re not alone. I''m only 25 and I''m already experiencing this. It has me worried about the rest of my life...! I''m so happy you started this thread, it''s made me feel a lot better.
I read a really interesting article, and for the life of me I can''t remember the magazine (sorry), but it was about this couple who made a New Year''s resolution to have sex EVERY DAY! Even more interesting, it was the wife''s idea.
To make a long story short, it was pretty difficult at first, and there were days when they had to force themselves to be intimate. When the resolution started, the sex would often last only a few minutes, and the wife never got her "home run." However, as they kept going with this "experiment" it began to last much longer and become much more pleasurable for the wife. Eventually they were hitting home runs much more easily.
The article had a lot more interesting things, I really wish I could remember the magazine.... Anyways, this is something that I''ve often thought about trying. I know it would be difficult at first (for me, not FI) but if the results were similar to the couple in the article, it could mean a major improvement.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 6/19/2008 2:22:33 PM
Author: BriBee
Just chiming in to say again that you''re not alone. I''m only 25 and I''m already experiencing this. It has me worried about the rest of my life...! I''m so happy you started this thread, it''s made me feel a lot better.
I read a really interesting article, and for the life of me I can''t remember the magazine (sorry), but it was about this couple who made a New Year''s resolution to have sex EVERY DAY! Even more interesting, it was the wife''s idea.
To make a long story short, it was pretty difficult at first, and there were days when they had to force themselves to be intimate. When the resolution started, the sex would often last only a few minutes, and the wife never got her ''home run.'' However, as they kept going with this ''experiment'' it began to last much longer and become much more pleasurable for the wife. Eventually they were hitting home runs much more easily.
The article had a lot more interesting things, I really wish I could remember the magazine.... Anyways, this is something that I''ve often thought about trying. I know it would be difficult at first (for me, not FI) but if the results were similar to the couple in the article, it could mean a major improvement.

My hubby and I found that we felt the same way when we were "getting it on" like 10 days in a row when we were TTC! At first it was work, but we actually found that it made us feel closer and more intimate after a while and we will probably try to do it more often in the future.

 

[brazen_irish_hussy]

I will try to keep this clean, but have you considered toys?
I had a friend who couldn''t go all the way; I suspect a mental block about losing control. She tried a lot of things and finally tried a vibrator and was able to finish. It seemed to release her and she was much more able after that. So much so, she now works as a sex columnist and has her masters degree in human sexuality, so I can get adive for anyone who wants to be more specific.

 

[BriBee]

This is such a weird coincidence, but look what story I just saw this morning:

http://www.aisledash.com/2008/06/14/could-you-have-sex-101-days-in-a-row/?icid=100214839x1204287162x1200186815


I don''t think this is the same couple as the original article I read. In that article the couple was trying to go every day for a year, and they didn''t make it because she got pregnant! But it''s the same idea.

 

[violet02]

Date: 6/20/2008 1:02:20 PM
Author: BriBee
This is such a weird coincidence, but look what story I just saw this morning:

http://www.aisledash.com/2008/06/14/could-you-have-sex-101-days-in-a-row/?icid=100214839x1204287162x1200186815


I don''t think this is the same couple as the original article I read. In that article the couple was trying to go every day for a year, and they didn''t make it because she got pregnant! But it''s the same idea.

I found this article:
http://www.brisbanetimes.com.au/articles/2008/06/13/1213321658164.html

I guess ''Just do it'' was written from by a man and 365 nights was written by women.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0425222578/ref=pd_luc_sim_01_01

Bri.. thanks for posting about the article. This is definitely interesting ''food for thought''. I wonder how effective it is.

 

[claireabelle]

oh you''re certainly not alone on this one!

I am only 25 and I have been experiencing this for the last few months... I think stress is a major contributor.

My Fiance and I talked about it and I decided to make more of an effort to respond to / initiate intimacy even if I''m not in the mood... it''s a bit awkward at first because it''s not spontaneous but when we get going it''s fantastic!

You really do have to make the effort. You owe it to your partner. Sex is very important in a healthy relationship. And don''t deny yourself the pleasure, either!

It''s kinda like those unexpected nights out when you''re dreading going to a party you''ve been invited to and you''re trying to come up with excuses not to go.... but when you make the effort to just leave the house and go - you have the most amazing time! And it makes you wonder why you were ever dreading it in the first place....(haha my fiance would KILL me if he saw me using that analogy!!! ...but its the best way I can explain it!)

bed wishes, claire xxxx