LIW''s under 23??

[emilina22]

who here is under 23?? just curious do you guys get the shocking look when you tell people that youve been in a relationship for so long and about how serious you are about your relationship?

Age:20
Birthday: Dec. 18th!!
How long: ive been with him for 5 years! yay
from: chicago!!

 

[poptart]

I''m not a LIW, as I''m married, but I''m the same age as you. My birthday is May 16th! We got married last year when we were 20, and some of the looks I get from people when I tell them my age are very disconcerting. We''ve been together for 5 years as well (HS sweethearts), and I guess people don''t think our marriage is going to survive since we''re so young, but we obviously don''t feel that way. I wish that people wouldn''t use age as the sole factor for judging the survival rate of a relationship, but I would like it even more if they could keep their facial expressions to themselves, even if they are judging us on the inside.

*M*

 

[musey]

Date: 3/28/2007 7:19:07 PM
Author:emilina22
who here is under 23?? just curious do you guys get the shocking look when you tell people that youve been in a relationship for so long and about how serious you are about your relationship?

I'm a BIW (not a LIW), but I am under 23 (will turn 23 in November). We don't really get shocked looks about the amount of time we've been in the relationship (I don't think THAT'S strange at all) or "how serious we are" because, well, I don't find myself volunteering that information to random people. And non-random people know us individually and as a couple, so they don't think it's strange/disconcerting at all!

The only awkward moment recently was at a "girls night out," when a guy cornered me for a few minutes and I was really forced into informing him that I am engaged and, therefore, off-limits. His response: "What?? How OLD are you?!" I just rolled my eyes and said "How old are YOU?" He seriously didn't believe me, even after I showed him my ring

Men are so pushy sometimes!

 

[emilina22]

im sure non of us volunteer information like that around when people see a ring on our hands people gve shocked looks......not always fun but oh well.....some people will be like that....right?

 

[poptart]

I don''t volunteer the information, but if you were to see me... I only look about 18. Some people say 16, lol, but that''s pushing it. That being said, I ALWAYS get asked how old I am, whether I''m at work, internship, or school.

*M*

 

[anchor31]

I''m engaged now, but I thought I''d answer anyway...

Met: 17
Starting dating: 18
LIW: 20
Engaged: 21 (my current age, we''d been together for 3 years, had known each other for 8 more months)
Birthday: May 6th
When we''ll be married, I will be 23 and we''ll have been together for 5 years.

I get odd looks, I''ve been asked if I didn''t want to look around more (what for? he''s everything I could ever want!), if I didn''t want to travel/study/whatever first (who says I can''t do those things while married?) and that kind of thing... Usually people are pretty surprise to see someone our age in such a committed relationship.

 

[anchor31]

Date: 3/28/2007 7:48:22 PM
Author: poptart
I don''t volunteer the information, but if you were to see me... I only look about 18. Some people say 16, lol, but that''s pushing it. That being said, I ALWAYS get asked how old I am, whether I''m at work, internship, or school.

*M*

That''s funny, people who don''t know me usually think I''m older.

I don''t really get comments from random people, most from acquintances and teammates at school who notice my ring and start asking questions. And then there''s my sister who seems to think that I''ll be dying on my wedding day or something...

 

[poptart]

Date: 3/28/2007 7:56:51 PM
Author: anchor31

Date: 3/28/2007 7:48:22 PM

Author: poptart

I don''t volunteer the information, but if you were to see me... I only look about 18. Some people say 16, lol, but that''s pushing it. That being said, I ALWAYS get asked how old I am, whether I''m at work, internship, or school.


*M*

That''s funny, people who don''t know me usually think I''m older.


I don''t really get comments from random people, most from acquintances and teammates at school who notice my ring and start asking questions. And then there''s my sister who seems to think that I''ll be dying on my wedding day or something...

I really do get asked by random people, which is the weirdest part. People have a tendency to just come up and start talking to me for no reason, tell me about their life... I don''t know why. Especially when I''m just minding my own business! But of course that leads into other areas of conversation, like marriage, family, etc.

*M*

 

[musey]

Date: 3/28/2007 7:38:36 PM
Author: emilina22
im sure non of us volunteer information like that around when people see a ring on our hands people gve shocked looks......not always fun but oh well.....some people will be like that....right?

I've never had someone just openly comment (or give me a look) based on the ring on my finger UNLESS I'm in a group of young people who assume I am close to their age (I still work with both college and high school students). I've had people tell me they thought I was about 28 and people tell me they thought I was 16.

A lot of age-profiling depends more on your demeanor and the way you choose to dress than the age that seems to be displayed on your face. ETA: And I definitely behave differently based on the age group of the people around me, so I probably morph to fit pretty well with whatever age group I want to fit with at the time. Comes in pretty handy.

Then again, I live Hollywood, where even 35 year-old women look 20 or under... so I think people around here have learned not to try to judge someone based on their age because--honestly--no one can tell HOW young/old anyone around here is!

 

[gigglebuns1186]

I''m 20 and my birthday is December 31st! I always feel belittled when I walk into a jewelry store looking at rings. I could probably pass as a 14 year old haha. I''m a nursing student and when I went to clinical one day my patient said "little girl come here" haa. My boyfriend and I both look young but hey when we get older we''ll still look young hopefully!

 

[happyfeet1988]

I''m 19 and im pretty sure a proposal is coming in a few months, he already bought the ring. I have a .38 ct. solitaire for a promise ring that i got when i was about 17, and i do get weird looks and questions. We''ve been dating since i was in 10th grade, so we''re used to the comments about "being too serious".

 

[cherry_vanilla]

I''m 21, been with the boyfriend for 3 years now. Most people think I''m older than I am, I don''t know if it''s because I''m incredibly serious about my schooling and further plans in a "scary math" major, or just how I carry myself, but EVERYONE that didn''t already know always pegs me about 2-3 years older than I actually am. Add to the fact my boyfriend is 4 years older, nobody seems to think twice about us being so serious and stable (except maybe his mom who''s still holding onto hope he''s going to settle down with a nice Jewish girl instead of me, but that''s a whole other story!) I actually think I have more family/friends wondering why we aren''t engaged yet than why I''m "throwing away my youth" or some other such nonsense. I''m a total kid at heart, I suppose I just do a really good job at tricking everyone else into thinking I''m not

Then again, I''m one of the few girls I know in real life in a serious long term relationship that''s not publicly all OMG I AM IN SUCH A MATURE SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP THEREFORE I AM COUNTING DOWN THE MINUTES UNTIL HE PROPOSES!!!!11 you all know the type. So maybe it''s more of an actions speak louder than words sort of thing in my case.

I live in a very urban metro area where the trend was to get engaged and married later in life, but it seems to me that it''s not nearly as unheard of as I''d have expected to get engaged towards the end of undergrad or shortly after college as I would have expected from an average marrying age in my area closer to 30!

 

[ljmorgan]

I just got married, turned 23, but I was 22 for most of our engagement. No one ever mentioned my age. Both hubby and I have our bachelor''s, work full-time, and have a home, so we''re pretty responsible for our age.

 

[sarahthewarrior]

I''m 21 (birthday May 9), my boyfriend is 24, and we''ve been together for 6 years--long-distance for almost the entire time because of different schools. I think I mostly get comments on the age difference based on when we met (e.g., you were in high school and he wasn''t???), but most people are usually more impressed with the duration of our relationship than shocked at our ages (e.g., 6 years!). Since when does what other people think matter anyway? I know people younger than I am who have known their SOs for less time and still beaten me down the aisle, but I''m in no rush. I never saw much point in being married if we were halfway across the country from each other. But he''s following me to graduate school, so the engagement is coming soon!

 

[caroline1]

I''m 22 i am new to this website, and my boyfriend just turned 28. I have been with him for 5 1/2 years and it has been wonderful. I mean we have our bad days but who doesn''t. I wanted to tell you guys my story on how we met. So here it goes; it''s kinda long but a good story.

My friends and i were hanging out at our friends shop. We were getting ready to go to my job where i bartend. It was during the summer so it was really nice out. We were outside and all of a sudden one of my girlfriends stopped some guy on a motorcycle. I told her she was crazy, she wanted a ride from this guy and of course her being so crazy she went on it. She came back and told me she had a blast and said the guy was really nice. She wanted me to go on the motorcycle too. Now mind you I was just getting out this bad relationship with another guy. So i was stressed out and I just wanted too feel free. So of course my gf convinced me to go on, and i had such a fun time. Later on that nig[:blackeyeht i told him where i was bartending and if he wanted to come by and get a couple drinks i would gladly take care of, since he was nice enough to take my gf and i out for a ride. I really didn''t care if he was gonna show up, b/c in the back of my mind i was thinking that was a crazy thing i just did with a a complete stranger.

Know i''m at work having an o.k. time b/c it was still early and no one was really there yet. An a hour or 2 went by and all of a sudden it started to pick up, Now guess who show''s up to get a drink, the same guy who took me on a ride. I got him and his friend a drink. Later on the night i started to look at him more and more, he was actually a handsome guy. i am filipino/jamiacan and i have only dated black guys before.I wasn''t really intrested in white guys (well i cant say i wasn''t intrested in white guys but i have never dated white guys before)but he had something about him that just made me constantly look at him and smile(i mean smile BIG!! and blush.) I have never really felt like that before. So i was closing up and told him he can come buy anytime, he then gave me his number. I know i just got out of a relationship but it was a rough and crazy one, and i just needed someone to help me bring back myself up again.

I''m at home cleaning my house, now mind you guys i had my own place by the time i was 18 and had a good job at verizon as a manager and by night i was a bartender. I was very proud of my self for being that independent woman. Sorry to get off the topic at little, but I found that number on my dresser and was wondering who the hell was Pete. Then i remembered it was "THE GUY"I was thinking in my mind should i call him, it has been about 3 weeks. I remembered the way he made me smile and I picked up the phone and asked him if he wanted to do something later on that week(MY heart was pounding, I felt like I was still in highschool LOL!!!) He said "yes" though so it was good. We went out on our first date it was so much fun, he made me laugh the whole entire time we were together until the time he dropped me off at my front porch.

I had a blast with him ever since. Who would of thought I would of find my true love just by taking a ride on a motorcycle with a complete stranger(LOL). So for all the people out there who think it will never happen to them, it will. Sometime''s love stare''s you right in your face and you don''t even know it. So take chances and remember you only live once!!!

Now I tell Peter all the time Meeting him was fate...becoming your friend was a choice...but falling in love with you was beyond control..

Now 5 1/2 years later i think he is ready to make me his wife. I''m so excited Last Nov-2006 we went to a well known Jeweler Steven Singer Jewelers in Philadelphia and I found my dream engagement ring, It was about the 4th jewelry store we went too; and I LADIES think I hit the jackpot. So i picked it out and now I am just anxiously waiting.
I HATE WAITING IT FEELS LIKE AN ETERNITY!!!!

 

[MustangFan]

Lindsay,
From your picture you look like your in your 30''s, hope I didn''t offend you... maybe it''s the veil?

I''m not under 23 but I have a niece in high school that I would pick up when she was sick and there like what? you are her aunt???!! They thought I was a high school kid trying to pull a fast one.. lol Makes me laugh. I think a lot has to do with dress and weight. My niece in on the heavy side and she looks older than me. I am still holding on to my youth, still wear the same clothes, just more refined.
I met a girl in college a couple of years ago from high school and she said you haven''t changed one bit!
My b/f in going to be 30 in Dec and people at work call him kid! Then people at work complain about being 26 and he says that''s nothing I''m going to be 30! They think he''s lying! lol so funny.

 

[emilina22]

caroline1- whats your dream ring look like?? dont be shy do tell......

we tend too look younger then we are too...my boyfriend especially hes 22 going on 23 but i swear people think that hes 17...i havent changed one bit since highschool and very little since 8th grade (maybe put on some dreadful pounds but never grew any taller) people always say that when we get older were gonna look like were still in our 20''s which is nice to here....

the way we met back in highschool was really cool heres my story...(by the way i love being highschool sweet hearts)

we grew up in the same church so we kinda knew each other by our families and face but never really knew who the other perosn really was....so on christmas eve and chirstmas day our churchs teenagers all go caroling to familes that want us to vistit and families who are in need of some christmas spirit...so back in 2001 this was my 2nd year and i was not expecting to have met him that night but while we were at the last house (which is always the biggest house way out in the burbs, and we all spend the night there all 70 of us) i was talking to some girls and then i noticed HIM sitting at the table with the guys(which happen to be the same i guys i hang out with too) and i decided to be a bit daring and go talk to him...well of course being 15 you just dont go and sit down you do someting stupid...so heres my stupid move as i got closer to him i reach out my hand and RUN MY FINGERS THROUGH HIS HAIR!!!!....weird i know...trust me just barley being 15 you still dont thnk straight and take into consideration that it was like 330 in the morning....luckly he wasnt the type of guy who thought you were crazy...he actually wanted to talk to me...so the rest of the night till 7am we spent talking...what i soon found out was that it was actually his birthday (Dec.26th) so techincally we met on his 17th birthday! ever since then we have been together....we became official Feb.22 (02*22*02)

i love knowing that weve been together so long i was never the kinda of girl that wanted to test the waters, or shop around for guys...i wanted to find my one and only and keep em...were best friends adn understand each otehr better than any one and being together for such a long time helped us get to where we are now...i love being YOUNG AND IN LOVE!!!!

 

[JCJD]

I''ve been married almost 2 years, but got married when I was 23, engaged at 22. I joined the LIW when I was 21. I was already in grad school at the time and DH and I were also high school sweethearts, together 7 years when we got engaged (4 years long distance during college), and together almost 8 years when we got married. I''ve always looked young for my age but also was more mature than others my age, and I never received strange looks/comments about being young and engaged/married.

Could it be the area you live in? A lot of my high school and college friends got engaged/married during the college years, which is pretty common here in the midwest. I think the average age women get married on the coasts (and in larger metropolitan areas) is older.

 

[anchor31]

Date: 3/29/2007 4:59:06 PM
Author: JCJD
I''ve been married almost 2 years, but got married when I was 23, engaged at 22. I joined the LIW when I was 21. I was already in grad school at the time and DH and I were also high school sweethearts, together 7 years when we got engaged (4 years long distance during college), and together almost 8 years when we got married. I''ve always looked young for my age but also was more mature than others my age, and I never received strange looks/comments about being young and engaged/married.

Could it be the area you live in? A lot of my high school and college friends got engaged/married during the college years, which is pretty common here in the midwest. I think the average age women get married on the coasts (and in larger metropolitan areas) is older.

That could explain it... I don''t personally know anyone else who is getting married around here (except allycat...)! Most people probably wait until they''re settled to marry. Then again, in Qc most couple don''t get married at all.

 

[bee*]

Date: 3/28/2007 7:19:07 PM
Author:emilina22
who here is under 23?? just curious do you guys get the shocking look when you tell people that youve been in a relationship for so long and about how serious you are about your relationship?

Age:20
Birthday: Dec. 18th!!
How long: ive been with him for 5 years! yay
from: chicago!!

Hey, Im not under 23 but I do share the same birthday as you!!! I''ll be 26 on the next one though!!

 

[RoseAngel04]

Another BIW here, not a LIW. I'm currently 21, and will still be 21 when we get married. FI will be 22 when we wed. We've been dating for 5 years and are High School sweethearts!

I never imagined that I would find my future husband so early in life, but feel blessed that I have! I consider myself very lucky to have found my love early on...more years for us to spend with one another!

Honestly, I haven't gotten a lot of the "your way too young" comments. The only comment close to this was from my doctor when she found out I was getting married. She asked if a lot of the students at my school get married early. I attend a Baptist University and there are several engaged/married young students at my school.

 

[musey]

Date: 3/29/2007 8:31:50 AM
Author: MustangFan

I''m not under 23 but I have a niece in high school that I would pick up when she was sick and there like what? you are her aunt???!! They thought I was a high school kid trying to pull a fast one.. lol Makes me laugh. I think a lot has to do with dress and weight. My niece in on the heavy side and she looks older than me. I am still holding on to my youth, still wear the same clothes, just more refined.

I gotta agree w/ that point, MF!

 

[emilina22]

BEE- thast soooooo cool! ive never met another person with the same birthday!!! w

oohooo

 

[ma1lyc]

hihi i''m 22 and it will be 9 years in October.. i don''t really get any shocking remarks about my age... but more shocked about the fact that were not engaged yet...

although im young... i feel like were 2 old farts lol

I actually have an interesting clubbing story as well; some guy tried to dance with me, and when i told him i was "engaged" b.c apprently just having a "bf" isn''t effective enough now a days.. you think he would back off.... Uhhhh no, he holds up his finger showing a ring and says, " it''s okay i''m married, still wanna dance?"

but aside from that... ARGGG HOW MUCH LONGER DO I HAVE TO WAIT?! ANOTHER 9 YEARS!!!

 

[bee*]

Date: 3/30/2007 12:19:45 AM
Author: emilina22
BEE- thast soooooo cool! ive never met another person with the same birthday!!! w

oohooo

Me neither!!

 

[Dandi]

I turned 25 on Monday just gone, and I was 22 when I was engaged. My FI is 7 years oilder than me, but I''ve always been perceived as older that I am, not really sure as to why

I''ve always been fiercely independant, bought my first property at age 21 etc. I never really got the "too serious" comments, people just saw that we were made for each other and couldn''t quibble with it, it was always just a matter of ''when'' and not ''if''. We''ve been together nearly 8 years now and will be married in November this year (yippee!!!) My FI bought his own house not long before I bought mine (we were a couple at the time, buying our own places was just something we wanted to do independently of each other) and have now built our ''real'' house together, I''ve got my uni degree and he runs his own business, so it''s certainly not like we''ve ''missed out'' on any opportunities by any means.

 

[emilina22]

ma1lyc- people in our church get married young and if not young soon after they start dating so we get the same "when are you two getting married looks and comments" it kinda bugs me cause its not their buisness....we arent getting married for several reasons ...school...work...savings (that that were not well off but we would like to be sure were stable and that we can afford to live a good life)...buying a hous and NOT A CONDO (most people our age who are married dont have houses but live in small cramped condos and we really dont want that)....and being ready ourselves(i still need to learn how to make some good old fashioned romanian dishes....and how to clean bathrooms and windows and i basically need good wife training...ive alwasy been busy with jobs and schools and never really learned ..... dont get me wrong i do clean but not like my mom...shes a master)...so like its not their buisness why we havent yet alothough we are planning on getting engaged next summer and we do have a stone thats been handed down through his family to me...

 

[cherry_vanilla]

Oh I think location has A LOT to do with it. I live in North Jersey, which is terribly beyond expensive - 21 year olds buying houses? Not in my area! I think so often times people (this is what happened with my cousins, late 20s-early 30s) don''t want to get married only to throw money away at renting an apartment until they''re in a position to buy a house, either by just living together first or saving money by living at home until they''d go right from their parents'' house to their own right after the wedding. In my case since I''ll be in grad school who knows where until I''m 29 or 30, can''t even think about home ownership until I''m done (that and I also don''t want to be just dating my boyfriend for what''d be 12 years at that point!)

I never wanted to get "married young" even though with the times we''re looking at I''ll be 24 (or just shy of) which is a world apart from married fresh out of high school or while still going through undergrad, it''s just what''s (probably) going to wind up happening.

 

[InlovewithJHK]

Hi everyone! I''m married but young (almost 23

) and wanted to chime in. I''m from the east coast and NONE of my friends are married. I was the only person I knew who was married (around my age) until I went to grad school. My Boston undergrad university had very few people who were getting married when I was engaged (I think maybe 2 or 3 out of the couple thousand in my year). I got LOTS of comments, especially from divorced people around my parents age. I learned to have a slightly thicker skin and not take these comments personally... these people hardly knew me and were judging me- they honestly had no clue. Also, my husband is 9 years older than me so people who didn''t know how we met thought that was odd as well. Everyone has an opinion

Good luck to everyone waiting on a proposal... the wait was sooo killer!

 

[MustangFan]

Cherry Vanilla- I know what it''s like.. I live in South Jersey and it''s still bloody expensive! $2200 mortgage is a killer.
Luckily my boyfriend has been a home owner since 24, this is his second house, my first.

InlovewithJHK-- 9 years is nothing! I was engaged to a guy 20 years my senior, and no one could understand that!