Laid-back wedding

[bugbride]

Hi cyber wedding planners! I am new to this forum and am not the kind of girl who has imagined my wedding since I was a little girl. My fiance has no ideas either. I need some serious help and advice from people in the know like you all. I just want an event that everyone will enjoy. I have some things already, like flowers, dress, location, DJ (sorta), food. I need some ideas about cake (or cupcakes or no cake), decor and bridesmaid dresses. I am going to go with wildflowers for the flowers in yellows, reds, oranges and am thinking of choosing a color for the bridesmaid dresses (green?) and having them all get their own style. Any ideas about nation-wide chains that would be good for pretty, flattering, laid-back dresses? Also, the ceremony is going to be a challenge because I want some Jewish elements, but nothing that will make my Atheist inlaws uncomfortable. I also have no officient or anything like that. What about ceremony music? I don''t want cannon in D (beautiful, so no offense to anyone who chose that), but would love suggestions. So, plan my wedding for me and you will all be forever appreciated! Yay!

 

[AllieLuv83]

Date: 1/15/2009 11:39:07 PM
Author:bugbride
Hi cyber wedding planners! I am new to this forum and am not the kind of girl who has imagined my wedding since I was a little girl. My fiance has no ideas either. I need some serious help and advice from people in the know like you all. I just want an event that everyone will enjoy. I have some things already, like flowers, dress, location, DJ (sorta), food. I need some ideas about cake (or cupcakes or no cake), decor and bridesmaid dresses. I am going to go with wildflowers for the flowers in yellows, reds, oranges and am thinking of choosing a color for the bridesmaid dresses (green?) and having them all get their own style. Any ideas about nation-wide chains that would be good for pretty, flattering, laid-back dresses? Also, the ceremony is going to be a challenge because I want some Jewish elements, but nothing that will make my Atheist inlaws uncomfortable. I also have no officient or anything like that. What about ceremony music? I don''t want cannon in D (beautiful, so no offense to anyone who chose that), but would love suggestions. So, plan my wedding for me and you will all be forever appreciated! Yay!

Hello...congratulations on your engagement and WELCOME. I think that Davids Bridal has many laid back bridesmaids dresses especially in their new spring 09 collection. My bridesmaids gowns were from J.Crew also pretty laid back. Scope the sales and you can get a pretty good deal. I can''t really help you with the officiant situation...I would personally seek a JP thats who I am using.

Good Luck

 

[jstarfireb]

For the bridesmaid dresses, I highly recommend Alfred Angelo. My wedding is also going to be pretty informal, and my bridesmaids are all wearing different dresses in the Alfred Angelo color "celadon" (sage green). They''re all the same length and fabric, but the girls were all free to choose their own necklines/silhouettes. The dresses are very well-made and almost as inexpensive as David''s, but I personally prefer their styles over David''s.

 

[AmberGretchen]

I really like some of the dresses from J Crew - if you want super casual, they have a seersucker-type fabric that looks like it would be really light and comfy (I have a dress in this fabric and love it) - it usually comes in several styles and many colors.

In terms of music, what kind of music do you listen to? When I think of laid-back, I think of low-key jazz, or the Beatles, but that''s different for everyone.

I''d incorporate casual into the food as much as possible - I think cupcakes are more casual than a fancy cake, and usually more tasty. You could do a bunch of different flavors with different frosting colors to match the flowers and the girls'' dresses.

I''d also focus on keeping all the details as low-key as possible - no fancy tableclothes or china, maybe don''t even do assigned seating, and longer family-style tables would be cool.

 

[dcgator]

Date: 1/16/2009 1:49:51 PM
Author: jstarfireb
For the bridesmaid dresses, I highly recommend Alfred Angelo. My wedding is also going to be pretty informal, and my bridesmaids are all wearing different dresses in the Alfred Angelo color ''celadon'' (sage green). They''re all the same length and fabric, but the girls were all free to choose their own necklines/silhouettes. The dresses are very well-made and almost as inexpensive as David''s, but I personally prefer their styles over David''s.

Yeah, jstarfireb, I totally agree! My bridesmaids will all be wearing Alfred Angelo too and in the celadon

. I also agree that I was not so taken with David''s Bridal stuff.

Another plus of Alfred Angelo is that many bridal stores accross the country carry those dresses, so no matter where your BM''s are, you can have each of them try on dresses. Also, I would recommend ordering them in one batch if you are looking for color matches.

As for cakes vs cupcakes, depending on the situation, location, and decoration, cupcakes or petite cakes can be more expensive than cakes, but that is totally dependent on the cake you are thinking of. Personally, I like cakes vs cupcakes, but that is totally your taste.

I would also get on finding an officient, as those are really important for the tone of the wedding, and you want someone you all feel comfortable with.

Good luck with everything and let me know if I can offer any other advice

 

[Elmorton]

Ditto to J Crew, but also try out Ann Taylor Celebrations - I remember there''s a really pretty green shade in there.

In terms of officiant - there was a thread awhile ago about having a friend as an officiant. I might at least have one - maybe have a friend ordained over the internet - so the responsibility of the ceremony isn''t on you. No matter how laid back the wedding is, there will be day-off jitters or stress, and it''s a lot easier to be walking down the aisle knowing that you don''t have to "perform" other than reading or saying your vows. We had a beautiful, simple wedding with a friend officiating from a script we''d written. I have an athiest inlaw (and I have no idea what the other one is) and then my parents are high-church Episcopalian, so we very much had a "fusion" ceremony. I borrowed prayers that I love from my religion but we took out parts that had God or a blessing as part of them, and I mention God in my vows...but other than that, religious elements were there - just more implied than overt. I highly recommend going to Border''s and buying a book of wedding ceremonies (I used a pink one that I''ve seen sold everywhere - it was great about having the wording from all sorts of religions and denominations from Judaism and Roman Catholic to Wiccan) and then just cutting and pasting the parts you like into a ceremony that you''re happy with.

Are you looking for classical music or something off the beaten path? For classical, I walked down to Sheep May Safely Graze by Bach - it was sweet, but not your typical wedding march (my mom walked to the same music, so it was a no-brainer for me to choose it). A friend of mine walked down to a guitar and vocal solo ( of..don''t flame me...I think it was the Beatles? The line is "Who knows how long I''ve loved you...and yet I love you still..."). On a wedding forum, I also read of someone walking down to Astrud Gilberto''s Day by Day which I love, love. If you like country/bluegrassy, I love love love "Lullaby" by the Dixie Chicks ("They didn''t have you where I come from...") which was something a friend of mine almost did but ultimately chose something else.

For cake/cupcakes - I love the idea of cupcakes. Another idea that a friend of mine did is that she asked a bunch of friends and family ahead of time to bake pies. Having wedding pie was really cute (they did do the ceremonial cutting), but it was also a lot less formal. Another friend did this as a favor, but would be great for a laid-back wedding: decorated cookies in the shape of a wedding cake for each guest. They were made using a family recipe and the recipe was attached to the box. A local baker did them for her.

As a guest, the three things that make a good wedding in my book are 1) Good people - when you''re happy to see others incredibly happy (and not stressed) that''s a great thing 2) Good food 3) Good music - it doesn''t matter who is playing (we had an iPod, a friend of mine had a band) - as long as it''s stuff that the crowd gets into. When DH and I planned our wedding, that''s the stuff we concentrated on.

Oh - one more thing for a laid back wedding - I think it''s a good idea to get vendors who do things other than weddings. I noticed that the vendors who had an idea of what a wedding "should be" are the ones we had trouble with, but the vendors who did lots of different types of events were the most flexible about doing things the way we wanted them.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Hi sis!

Don't forget your guest list...that would be a lot of cupcakes! Also I like the idea of looking other places than David's since you didn't like any of their greens (though they might have different colors by now). I'll look at some websites too.

ETA: by the way the girls want to see your ring

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Do you like something like this? This is pretty (and different). You wore bill levkoff for my wedding. Warning his website is really annoying! I like this one. This is cute if you wanted tea length.

 

[jstarfireb]

Some more suggestions I thought of just now...

Cake - I love the idea of cupcakes for a casual wedding. Plus, you may be able to avoid those pesky cake cutting fees. I thought about them for my own wedding but didn''t end up using them because I loved a particular 3-tiered cake that I saw.

Decor - depends on whether it''s indoors or outdoors...do you have that part planned out? I''m having an outdoor ceremony and will let nature be my decor.

Bridesmaid dresses - already suggested Alfred Angelo, but definitely think about tea or cocktail length instead of long dresses. They will give the wedding a much more informal feel.

Officiant - perhaps a nonsectarian or Unitarian minister could incorporate some Jewish and some secular elements? I''m a Unitarian, and our services draw from a lot of traditions, including Christian, Jewish, Humanist, Pagan, Wiccan, etc...

Music - Is there any music that is particularly meaningful to you? Do you play an instrument that you''d like to have showcased? For example, I play the hammered dulcimer and decided to have a completely dulcimer-driven ceremony. The particular songs I chose were ones recorded by my friends who also play. Otherwise, a string quartet is always a nice choice and could work for formal or informal weddings.

 

[princesss]

Oh my goodness, I have to second "Lullaby" by the Dixie Chicks. I have it on repeat now and it''s truly one of the most beautiful songs I''ve ever heard.

What about getting a friend registered to be able to perform the ceremony? That way you can pull from different traditions, and incorporate what''s important to you from the Jewish ceremony, as well as other religions and cultures.

For a relaxed wedding, I love the idea of cupcakes and family-style tables. Do you have any idea of how many people will be attending? You may be able to do one long table, which would be SO COOL.

Do you want outdoors or indoors? What season?

Give me a little time and I can come up with some inspiration boards. I love doing those, and they''re a great way to visualize what you like and what you don''t.

 

[misspinky]

I''m with you on the avoidance of Canon in D (love the song--it''s the only thing that will calm my daughter down when she''s REALLY upset) but I knew that I wanted to walk down the aisle to something else.

I went with songs by Vitamin string quartet:
Sound of Settling (from their Indie Wedding Album)
and Just Like Heaven (from the Gothic Wedding Album--don''t be scared

)

 

[Harriet]

Date: 1/15/2009 11:39:07 PM
Author:bugbride
Hi cyber wedding planners! I am new to this forum and am not the kind of girl who has imagined my wedding since I was a little girl. My fiance has no ideas either. I need some serious help and advice from people in the know like you all. I just want an event that everyone will enjoy. I have some things already, like flowers, dress, location, DJ (sorta), food. I need some ideas about cake (or cupcakes or no cake), decor and bridesmaid dresses. I am going to go with wildflowers for the flowers in yellows, reds, oranges and am thinking of choosing a color for the bridesmaid dresses (green?) and having them all get their own style. Any ideas about nation-wide chains that would be good for pretty, flattering, laid-back dresses? Also, the ceremony is going to be a challenge because I want some Jewish elements, but nothing that will make my Atheist inlaws uncomfortable. I also have no officient or anything like that. What about ceremony music? I don''t want cannon in D (beautiful, so no offense to anyone who chose that), but would love suggestions. So, plan my wedding for me and you will all be forever appreciated! Yay!

No Pachelbel?

Cupcakes would be fun for a laidback wedding. Have you looked at Priscilla of Bostom for fun bridesmaid dresses? How about using a civil officiant so that your in-laws are comfortable. I''m not sure how to incorporate Jewish elements though. Btw, this forum rocks. The posters helped me plan my wedding in less than a month. Dress and all. Good luck!

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 1/17/2009 9:27:11 AM
Author: Tacori E-ring
Hi sis!

Don''t forget your guest list...that would be a lot of cupcakes! Also I like the idea of looking other places than David''s since you didn''t like any of their greens (though they might have different colors by now). I''ll look at some websites too.

ETA: by the way the girls want to see your ring

Welcome and yes, please, post the ring!!!

 

[snlee]

Date: 1/17/2009 8:11:20 PM
Author: Skippy123

Date: 1/17/2009 9:27:11 AM
Author: Tacori E-ring

Hi sis!

Don't forget your guest list...that would be a lot of cupcakes! Also I like the idea of looking other places than David's since you didn't like any of their greens (though they might have different colors by now). I'll look at some websites too.

ETA: by the way the girls want to see your ring

Welcome and yes, please, post the ring!!!

Ditto! Can't wait to see it!

 

[packrat]

We had a Justice of the Peace do our wedding-he was about 6 grades ahead of me in school and I had the hugest crush on him-ha! When we met w/him, he had a binder of "ceremonies" he could do, so I went thru and did a cut and paste of what I wanted-it was so easy. I''d found a couple small books that had love/marriage poems, quotes, sayings, short essays, and one of my uncles read an essay during the ceremony. Our wedding was super laid back, I thought, and I loved every minute of it.

I like the idea of cupcakes! I''ve seen that in magazines and always thought it looked so sweet! And having a friend perform the ceremony would be very meaningful!

 

[neatfreak]

I had a pretty casual wedding and honestly, it all came together kind of organically. I just picked individual elements I liked without worrying about matching or themes and I think it came out pretty nicely! I have other pictures if you want anything specific, but here is my thread if you are interested:


My wedding thread

I am part Jewish and my husband was raised Quaker so one element we incorporated was a marriage certificate/ketubah. Ours was handmade by someone in NY and it's gorgeous. It hangs in our home and has vows on it, but no religious anything. Just a tradition from both of our backgrounds that we loved and incorporated. I think you can easily add in "Jewish" elements like that without your inlaws even noticing.

For ceremony music I walked down the aisle to "Into the Mystic" by Van Morrison and at the end we played "Four eyed girl" by Rhett Miller. Just pick your favorite songs, it'll all meld nicely I promise!

ETA: Your sister knows how to contact me if you want pictures of our wedding certificate or anything. Too personal to post here but I would be happy to get it to you!

 

[packrat]

*jumping in quickly* Neatfreak, you are seriously photogenic! Beautiful pictures! *jumps back out*

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Ummm...look what I found! Adorable!

 

[bugbride]

Thank you so much for your advice. I''m going to find those online. My mom is now concerned that MY dress is too fancy for informal bridesmaids. I guess it just never ends.

 

[bugbride]

Those are great ideas. I was already thinking cupcakes because of the exorbitant plating fee and all. Besides, cupcakes are the best ever. They always make me happy.

 

[princesss]

Date: 1/21/2009 9:55:22 PM
Author: bugbride
Thank you so much for your advice. I''m going to find those online. My mom is now concerned that MY dress is too fancy for informal bridesmaids. I guess it just never ends.

Oooh, there''s a dress? Can we pleeeeeeease have pictures?

(PS I haven''t forgotten about inspiration boards, I''m doing them tonight. It will be fun. And I''ll try to pull from nationwide chains so that I can tell you where things come from if you like them. I kinda sorta super duper love this stuff.)

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Princesss, hopefully she has a pic since she and the dress live across the country. If not it is very beautiful (and a tad formal). Strapless, candlelight (I think they call the color), drop waist, full skirt with lots of silver stitching. Can''t remember if there is beading. She HAS to also find *comfortable* 4" heels b/c that is the max. they can take off to keep the detailing intact. Anyone have any ideas? Haha. My mom thinks silvery BM dresses would look good b/c they would match with her dress and serve has a neutral backdrop for the flowers. She is getting married in August at a local garden. Not sure if it is outside or not. It will be a night wedding (right?)

 

[jstarfireb]

Tacori, I always like the idea of silver bridesmaid dresses...not so much a shiny silver, but more of a beautiful platinum, like this...

 

[Octavia]

Bugbride, for informal centerpieces, have you thought of looking at yard sales or antique/junk shops for old vases and pitchers to hold the wildflowers? They're usually just a couple dollars apiece, and if you get some milk glass, depression glass, mason jars, etc. it would be a great mix. I think it looks awesome when the containers don't match, and wildflowers are so simple -- you just drop them into the container and they look gorgeous all on their own, no fiddly arrangement necessary. Depending on when your wedding is, you could also add some long grass or wheat stalks (cut down to size) for additional color and substance. Laid-back and economical!

 

[princesss]

Okay, here is a really quick idea. There are a few random centerpieces thrown in, and some family style tables.

When you think about your day, what do you envision?

Also, if you go to the website, there is music attached to it so you can hear "Lullaby" that was mentioned above.

Relaxed and casual is stunning, you just have to browse through a lot of options to see what you think will work. I like to take my BF''s advice on stuff like this: "Honey, if you like it, that''s enough to tie it together. It''ll work if you love it all." Works for decorating my apartment, works for planning weddings. If you love all of the elements, they''ll come together. Just keep an eye on warm and cool tones, and you should be fine.

 

[bugbride]

Date: 1/15/2009 11:39:07 PM
Author:bugbride
Hi cyber wedding planners! I am new to this forum and am not the kind of girl who has imagined my wedding since I was a little girl. My fiance has no ideas either. I need some serious help and advice from people in the know like you all. I just want an event that everyone will enjoy. I have some things already, like flowers, dress, location, DJ (sorta), food. I need some ideas about cake (or cupcakes or no cake), decor and bridesmaid dresses. I am going to go with wildflowers for the flowers in yellows, reds, oranges and am thinking of choosing a color for the bridesmaid dresses (green?) and having them all get their own style. Any ideas about nation-wide chains that would be good for pretty, flattering, laid-back dresses? Also, the ceremony is going to be a challenge because I want some Jewish elements, but nothing that will make my Atheist inlaws uncomfortable. I also have no officient or anything like that. What about ceremony music? I don''t want cannon in D (beautiful, so no offense to anyone who chose that), but would love suggestions. So, plan my wedding for me and you will all be forever appreciated! Yay!

Hi everyone. Thanks for all your ideas. I''m going to look through them and let you all know if I have more questions. I also have pictures of my ring that I promise to post. They are on a handy CD that Greenlake sent to me. I love them. Ok, more later!

-bugbride

 

[bugbride]

Date: 1/17/2009 9:43:37 PM
Author: neatfreak
I had a pretty casual wedding and honestly, it all came together kind of organically. I just picked individual elements I liked without worrying about matching or themes and I think it came out pretty nicely! I have other pictures if you want anything specific, but here is my thread if you are interested:


My wedding thread

I am part Jewish and my husband was raised Quaker so one element we incorporated was a marriage certificate/ketubah. Ours was handmade by someone in NY and it''s gorgeous. It hangs in our home and has vows on it, but no religious anything. Just a tradition from both of our backgrounds that we loved and incorporated. I think you can easily add in ''Jewish'' elements like that without your inlaws even noticing.

For ceremony music I walked down the aisle to ''Into the Mystic'' by Van Morrison and at the end we played ''Four eyed girl'' by Rhett Miller. Just pick your favorite songs, it''ll all meld nicely I promise!

ETA: Your sister knows how to contact me if you want pictures of our wedding certificate or anything. Too personal to post here but I would be happy to get it to you!

I think we have similar situations. How did you find the ketubah person? I would love someone to make one for us. Was it someone you knew? I want one of those and my mom is putting together a chuppah for us. Did you make a pamphlet or something that described what everything meant for non-religious folks or just did it? I love the idea of just putting together things that we like and not worrying about theme. I''m not one for the theme. So, who married you? I guess I could just find a JP, but I don''t even know where to look. My friend said that I can just get anyone to get a certificate online. Thanks for your help

 

[bugbride]

Date: 1/22/2009 9:59:55 PM
Author: princesss
Okay, here is a really quick idea. There are a few random centerpieces thrown in, and some family style tables.

When you think about your day, what do you envision?

Also, if you go to the website, there is music attached to it so you can hear ''Lullaby'' that was mentioned above.

Relaxed and casual is stunning, you just have to browse through a lot of options to see what you think will work. I like to take my BF''s advice on stuff like this: ''Honey, if you like it, that''s enough to tie it together. It''ll work if you love it all.'' Works for decorating my apartment, works for planning weddings. If you love all of the elements, they''ll come together. Just keep an eye on warm and cool tones, and you should be fine.

You are my hero. I like the flowers in a pitcher. Those are beautiful and I could probably put them in a variety of different containers. Would I put a bunch of tea lights around them? The pictures are on my aunt''s camara, so I have to have her email them to me. Hopefully she still has them! I will get this all done soon, just been crazy-busy with my teaching job. It''s a crazy time of year. Anyway, I really do appreciate it and I will get those pictures posted, hopefully this weekend.

 

[neatfreak]

Date: 1/29/2009 7:37:19 PM
Author: bugbride

Date: 1/17/2009 9:43:37 PM

Author: neatfreak

I had a pretty casual wedding and honestly, it all came together kind of organically. I just picked individual elements I liked without worrying about matching or themes and I think it came out pretty nicely! I have other pictures if you want anything specific, but here is my thread if you are interested:



My wedding thread


I am part Jewish and my husband was raised Quaker so one element we incorporated was a marriage certificate/ketubah. Ours was handmade by someone in NY and it's gorgeous. It hangs in our home and has vows on it, but no religious anything. Just a tradition from both of our backgrounds that we loved and incorporated. I think you can easily add in 'Jewish' elements like that without your inlaws even noticing.


For ceremony music I walked down the aisle to 'Into the Mystic' by Van Morrison and at the end we played 'Four eyed girl' by Rhett Miller. Just pick your favorite songs, it'll all meld nicely I promise!


ETA: Your sister knows how to contact me if you want pictures of our wedding certificate or anything. Too personal to post here but I would be happy to get it to you!

I think we have similar situations. How did you find the ketubah person? I would love someone to make one for us. Was it someone you knew? I want one of those and my mom is putting together a chuppah for us. Did you make a pamphlet or something that described what everything meant for non-religious folks or just did it? I love the idea of just putting together things that we like and not worrying about theme. I'm not one for the theme. So, who married you? I guess I could just find a JP, but I don't even know where to look. My friend said that I can just get anyone to get a certificate online. Thanks for your help

I actually just found the ketubah people online. This is their website:

http://www.documentsanddesigns.com/

I worked with Terri, she was super nice. I basically just sent her the graphics that we wanted, the colors, and the wording and she did the rest.

We didn't make any kind of program (we had a very small informal wedding) but you certainly could. My husband's best friend married us. Hope that helps! I think your sister mentioned you are getting married in Wisconsin? I am in Madison!