Find your diamond
Find your jewelry
shape
carat
color
clarity

Joe Biden's Letter to Stanford Sexual Assault Survivor

House Cat

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 22, 2009
Messages
4,005
http://www.motherjones.com/media/2016/06/read-joe-bidens-open-letter-stanford-suvivor-sexual-assault

His letter is very powerful. As I was reading it, I was thinking that maybe, just maybe, things are beginning to change when it comes to sexual assault and how we will treat the survivors in the future. Maybe this whole case will change the sentencing. Maybe it will change the culture and how we question the survivor, how we put so much responsibility on the person being raped.

Just maybe...
 

Bonfire

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 22, 2014
Messages
3,180
It's very troubling that that neither Brock Turner or his father have said, "we are sorry this happened", or "I take full responsibility for my behavior." Parents aren't teaching their children that poor decision making can alter the course of their lives forever. Instead it's , "I'll get you out of this."
I think coaches in every school and University should be sitting their teams down to listen to the victim's 14 page statement.
We as a society (parents, grandparents, coaches, teachers, clergy) have a responsibility to define what respectful behavior is. We have a lot of soul-searching to do in response to rape in our society.
 

House Cat

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 22, 2009
Messages
4,005
Bonfire|1465572528|4042671 said:
It's very troubling that that neither Brock Turner or his father have said, "we are sorry this happened", or "I take full responsibility for my behavior." Parents aren't teaching their children that poor decision making can alter the course of their lives forever. Instead it's , "I'll get you out of this."
I think coaches in every school and University should be sitting their teams down to listen to the victim's 14 page statement.
We as a society (parents, grandparents, coaches, teachers, clergy) have a responsibility to define what respectful behavior is. We have a lot of soul-searching to do in response to rape in our society.
My son is at a state university. He was not allowed to finish enrollment until he watched a two hour video on sexual assault. The girls have the same protocol. Although I am glad the college does this, it makes me very sad that they HAVE to...that the parents aren't teaching it.

I am a survivor. My older sons know this. We have had many talks about rape and consent. My youngest is now 11. He doesn't know my story yet, but we are beginning talks about sexual assault. I think we need to be open about this subject. It isn't taboo. If done right, it is just like any other lesson that needs to be addressed in a child's life.

I wish someone would have talked with me about it. I would have known that extreme coercion was also rape. I didn't even learn that until my son told me about it from watching the video. The whole, "if you love me you will do it" or "i will break up with you if you don't do it." or the guy who just won't leave a girl alone, so she gives in to make him go away... yeah. None of that is real consent.

I think teaching our kids about sexual assault is a first line approach at beginning to change the culture at its source.


It really boggles my mind that Brock's dad would want to save him from such a valuable lesson. It wasn't as though his dad felt Brock was innocent. He admitted that he was guilty. He just didn't want him to feel the consequences of his horrid actions. I can't wrap my mind around that.
 

asscherisme

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 6, 2006
Messages
2,734
House Cat|1465574217|4042681 said:
Bonfire|1465572528|4042671 said:
It's very troubling that that neither Brock Turner or his father have said, "we are sorry this happened", or "I take full responsibility for my behavior." Parents aren't teaching their children that poor decision making can alter the course of their lives forever. Instead it's , "I'll get you out of this."
I think coaches in every school and University should be sitting their teams down to listen to the victim's 14 page statement.
We as a society (parents, grandparents, coaches, teachers, clergy) have a responsibility to define what respectful behavior is. We have a lot of soul-searching to do in response to rape in our society.
My son is at a state university. He was not allowed to finish enrollment until he watched a two hour video on sexual assault. The girls have the same protocol. Although I am glad the college does this, it makes me very sad that they HAVE to...that the parents aren't teaching it.

I am a survivor. My older sons know this. We have had many talks about rape and consent. My youngest is now 11. He doesn't know my story yet, but we are beginning talks about sexual assault. I think we need to be open about this subject. It isn't taboo. If done right, it is just like any other lesson that needs to be addressed in a child's life.

I wish someone would have talked with me about it. I would have known that extreme coercion was also rape. I didn't even learn that until my son told me about it from watching the video. The whole, "if you love me you will do it" or "i will break up with you if you don't do it." or the guy who just won't leave a girl alone, so she gives in to make him go away... yeah. None of that is real consent.

I think teaching our kids about sexual assault is a first line approach at beginning to change the culture at its source.


It really boggles my mind that Brock's dad would want to save him from such a valuable lesson. It wasn't as though his dad felt Brock was innocent. He admitted that he was guilty. He just didn't want him to feel the consequences of his horrid actions. I can't wrap my mind around that.
I am so sorry for what you went through. I agree so much with what you wrote. My son goes to a state university and they make all freshman (and they do separate presentations for men and women) attend seminars on sexual assault, what consent means, etc.

I have had many talks with my sons AND daughters and this topic. My oldest 2 kids are 19 and 17 and we have had so many conversations I can't even count. I think educating both our sons and daughters is equally important.

As a mother to both sons and daughters I am so sickened by this and I am happy to see the response of disgust towards the perpetrator and support of the survivor.

I read somewhere that Brock's father said that his son should not be punished harshly for what he called "20 minutes of action". That is a vomit-worthy, cringe inducing statement.
 

House Cat

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Feb 22, 2009
Messages
4,005
asscherisme|1465579191|4042709 said:
House Cat|1465574217|4042681 said:
Bonfire|1465572528|4042671 said:
It's very troubling that that neither Brock Turner or his father have said, "we are sorry this happened", or "I take full responsibility for my behavior." Parents aren't teaching their children that poor decision making can alter the course of their lives forever. Instead it's , "I'll get you out of this."
I think coaches in every school and University should be sitting their teams down to listen to the victim's 14 page statement.
We as a society (parents, grandparents, coaches, teachers, clergy) have a responsibility to define what respectful behavior is. We have a lot of soul-searching to do in response to rape in our society.
My son is at a state university. He was not allowed to finish enrollment until he watched a two hour video on sexual assault. The girls have the same protocol. Although I am glad the college does this, it makes me very sad that they HAVE to...that the parents aren't teaching it.

I am a survivor. My older sons know this. We have had many talks about rape and consent. My youngest is now 11. He doesn't know my story yet, but we are beginning talks about sexual assault. I think we need to be open about this subject. It isn't taboo. If done right, it is just like any other lesson that needs to be addressed in a child's life.

I wish someone would have talked with me about it. I would have known that extreme coercion was also rape. I didn't even learn that until my son told me about it from watching the video. The whole, "if you love me you will do it" or "i will break up with you if you don't do it." or the guy who just won't leave a girl alone, so she gives in to make him go away... yeah. None of that is real consent.

I think teaching our kids about sexual assault is a first line approach at beginning to change the culture at its source.


It really boggles my mind that Brock's dad would want to save him from such a valuable lesson. It wasn't as though his dad felt Brock was innocent. He admitted that he was guilty. He just didn't want him to feel the consequences of his horrid actions. I can't wrap my mind around that.
I am so sorry for what you went through. I agree so much with what you wrote. My son goes to a state university and they make all freshman (and they do separate presentations for men and women) attend seminars on sexual assault, what consent means, etc.

I have had many talks with my sons AND daughters and this topic. My oldest 2 kids are 19 and 17 and we have had so many conversations I can't even count. I think educating both our sons and daughters is equally important.

As a mother to both sons and daughters I am so sickened by this and I am happy to see the response of disgust towards the perpetrator and support of the survivor.

I read somewhere that Brock's father said that his son should not be punished harshly for what he called "20 minutes of action". That is a vomit-worthy, cringe inducing statement.
Yes, Biden addresses the "20 minutes of action" comment very well by saying;
"You will never be defined by what the defendant’s father callously termed “20 minutes of action.”
His son will be."


Such powerful stuff! I really like that man!
 

VRBeauty

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 2, 2006
Messages
10,228
Bonfire|1465572528|4042671 said:
It's very troubling that that neither Brock Turner or his father have said, "we are sorry this happened", or "I take full responsibility for my behavior." Parents aren't teaching their children that poor decision making can alter the course of their lives forever. Instead it's , "I'll get you out of this."
You're right of course - and that kind of thinking, that potential outcomes rather than what is right should govern one's actions, has permeated our culture for a long time. I remember still remember the discussion my 4th grade teacher had with us about cheating. She asked the class why we shouldn't cheat. I and some others replied "it's wrong" or "it's stealing." But the answer she was going for was... eventually you will get caught or it will catch up to you. :nono:

I don't agree with my 4th grade teacher's reasoning or the sentence handed down in this case. But, her reasoning does come into play here. I think one of the ironies in this case is that because of the parents' and judge's actions, the impact this will have on Brock Turner's life will be far worse and will last far longer than the impact that a fair sentence would have had. So in a way, justice has been served.
 

Laila619

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 28, 2008
Messages
11,608
I have both sons and daughters. I plan on teaching them personal responsibility and respect for others. That is to say I will teach my sons to respect women, and I will teach my daughters to respect themselves, be safe, and not get wasted in public. We heed to teach BOTH sexes these things. Young men need to not mess around with drunk women, because according to the law, a drunk person cannot consent. And women need to start taking responsibility for their safety. It is not wise to get so drunk that you have complete memory loss and you do not know where you are or whom you're with. Something far worse can happen than rape--these young women could end up murdered. People are taught to lock their doors, lock their cars, keep valuables in a safe, etc. Well there's nothing more valuable than one's own life.
 

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 3, 2004
Messages
31,539
asscherisme|1465579191|4042709 said:
I read somewhere that Brock's father said that his son should not be punished harshly for what he called "20 minutes of action". That is a vomit-worthy, cringe inducing statement.
They should throw the father in jail too. Only a few months in jail for this type crime is an insult to the victim. .. :angryfire:
 

asscherisme

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 6, 2006
Messages
2,734
House Cat|1465581301|4042720 said:
asscherisme|1465579191|4042709 said:
House Cat|1465574217|4042681 said:
Bonfire|1465572528|4042671 said:
It's very troubling that that neither Brock Turner or his father have said, "we are sorry this happened", or "I take full responsibility for my behavior." Parents aren't teaching their children that poor decision making can alter the course of their lives forever. Instead it's , "I'll get you out of this."
I think coaches in every school and University should be sitting their teams down to listen to the victim's 14 page statement.
We as a society (parents, grandparents, coaches, teachers, clergy) have a responsibility to define what respectful behavior is. We have a lot of soul-searching to do in response to rape in our society.
My son is at a state university. He was not allowed to finish enrollment until he watched a two hour video on sexual assault. The girls have the same protocol. Although I am glad the college does this, it makes me very sad that they HAVE to...that the parents aren't teaching it.

I am a survivor. My older sons know this. We have had many talks about rape and consent. My youngest is now 11. He doesn't know my story yet, but we are beginning talks about sexual assault. I think we need to be open about this subject. It isn't taboo. If done right, it is just like any other lesson that needs to be addressed in a child's life.

I wish someone would have talked with me about it. I would have known that extreme coercion was also rape. I didn't even learn that until my son told me about it from watching the video. The whole, "if you love me you will do it" or "i will break up with you if you don't do it." or the guy who just won't leave a girl alone, so she gives in to make him go away... yeah. None of that is real consent.

I think teaching our kids about sexual assault is a first line approach at beginning to change the culture at its source.


It really boggles my mind that Brock's dad would want to save him from such a valuable lesson. It wasn't as though his dad felt Brock was innocent. He admitted that he was guilty. He just didn't want him to feel the consequences of his horrid actions. I can't wrap my mind around that.
I am so sorry for what you went through. I agree so much with what you wrote. My son goes to a state university and they make all freshman (and they do separate presentations for men and women) attend seminars on sexual assault, what consent means, etc.

I have had many talks with my sons AND daughters and this topic. My oldest 2 kids are 19 and 17 and we have had so many conversations I can't even count. I think educating both our sons and daughters is equally important.

As a mother to both sons and daughters I am so sickened by this and I am happy to see the response of disgust towards the perpetrator and support of the survivor.

I read somewhere that Brock's father said that his son should not be punished harshly for what he called "20 minutes of action". That is a vomit-worthy, cringe inducing statement.
Yes, Biden addresses the "20 minutes of action" comment very well by saying;
"You will never be defined by what the defendant’s father callously termed “20 minutes of action.”
His son will be."


Such powerful stuff! I really like that man!

I agree. I already liked Biden. Among many reasons he came out supporting gay marriage before Obama publicly did. I just gained even more respect for him.
 

asscherisme

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Mar 6, 2006
Messages
2,734
Laila619|1465591554|4042776 said:
I have both sons and daughters. I plan on teaching them personal responsibility and respect for others. That is to say I will teach my sons to respect women, and I will teach my daughters to respect themselves, be safe, and not get wasted in public. We heed to teach BOTH sexes these things. Young men need to not mess around with drunk women, because according to the law, a drunk person cannot consent. And women need to start taking responsibility for their safety. It is not wise to get so drunk that you have complete memory loss and you do not know where you are or whom you're with. Something far worse can happen than rape--these young women could end up murdered. People are taught to lock their doors, lock their cars, keep valuables in a safe, etc. Well there's nothing more valuable than one's own life.
Absolutely, very well said.
 

MissGotRocks

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 23, 2005
Messages
12,186
Joe Biden is a class act. I hope this young woman finds some solace in his words.
 

Tacori E-ring

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Aug 15, 2005
Messages
20,038
MissGotRocks|1465687566|4043049 said:
Joe Biden is a class act. I hope this young woman finds some solace in his words.
I agree. What a powerful letter. :clap:
 
Be a part of the community It's free, join today!
    Three-stone engagement ring upgrade
    Three-stone engagement ring upgrade
    Vintage OEC Bracelet
    Vintage OEC Bracelet
    June’s Birthstone Trinity
    June’s Birthstone Trinity

Need Something Special?

Get a quote from multiple trusted and vetted jewelers.

Holloway Cut Advisor



Diamond Eye Candy

Click to view full-size image.
Top