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Is it ok to use grandmothers ring to propose?

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JustMe1979

Rough_Rock
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Jun 4, 2009
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My mother has given my my grandmothers wedding ring to use if I want when I propose. I never knew my grandmother because she passed away from breast cancer before I was born so I feel it is something special to have this ring to use. It is 1 kt round cut on a simple white gold band. Very traditional and this is exactly what she has said she likes. She does not know I have this ring.

My question is, do girls/women ever take offense to their guy not buying them a ring but instead using something like this which is inherited?

I can go buy her a ring just as easy but I thought this has more meaning.

Thoughts?
 

jmtomaui

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 10, 2006
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390
JustMe, I think it is a lovely sentiment that you want your future wife to wear a family heirloom. And many, many other women will / would feel the same way.

However, there may be some that would rather have a ring that is all their own.

I have a couple of questions to maybe think about. Could you afford to buy her a ring on your own? Would it delay your proposal for quite some time?

I would suggest that you could propose to her with the family ring. And then, if she would rather have a ring of her own, would the 2 of you be open to using the stone in a setting that you both pick out / design together? Then you could have a colored stone set in the original setting for a beautiful right hand ring.

These are just some of my thoughts. Again, I love the idea of the family heriloom! And am sure she will love whatever you decide.

Julie
 

vespergirl

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Jan 29, 2007
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5,497
I think that it''s a beautiful idea, and the ring sounds lovely. Many women would love having a piece of jewelry that is so special to the family. However, there are some women who have dreamed of a specific design of an ering for years, and would prefer their own design to something that was intended for someone else.

It sounds like your girlfriend likes the design of the ring, though, so you should be OK proposing with that one.

What you may want to do, though, during the proposal, is to let her know that you thought it would be romantic to propose with your grandmother''s ring, but if there''s something different that she had her heart set on, you would be OK with getting her a new ring (if this is true). I would also let her know that she can pick out her wedding band herself, and then let the sky be the limit for her wedding band (diamonds or whatever she wants), since you got the engagement ring for free. It sounds like the simplicity of your grandmother''s ring would look great with any type of band, so she can get creative and pick something that''s her own style when she gets her wedding band.

Good luck with your proposal!
 

CNYHopeful

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 9, 2008
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360
I think it''s a very sweet sentiment and it would be a marvelous option. I think any woman would be fortunate to receive such a beautiful heirloom.

I offered my FI my grandmother''s ring to propose with (silly, I know) but he was the one who chose to design the ring instead. What we may end up doing is using the diamonds and band from my grandmother''s e-ring and wedding bands for our own. We''ll melt the gold and use a portion of it to mold our own wedding bands. The diamonds will be set within my wedding band along with sapphires to match my e-ring. Perhaps this is an option for you?
 

diamondseeker2006

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Jan 11, 2006
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I''d definitely propose with that ring and tell her that it can stay her e-ring or it can become a pendant or right hand ring and you''ll get her a different e-ring. That way she can choose whether to use this ring as her e-ring, but you can go ahead and propose!!!!
 
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