Hi Ladies...we''re receiving our RSVPs and got an interesting one in the mail the other day and FI and I are at a loss as to what we should say or do.
One of his closest friends from college, we''ll call him Tom, has been dating a girl, we''ll call her Amanda for the last 7-8 years.
I have always been very close to Tom as he is one of FIs closest friends, and in turn have become very close to Amanda.
When we sent out the invitations we addressed it to both of them, they practically live(d?) together, and just thought it would be appropriate, this was not a new relationship etc.
We sent out our invitations mid-march, over the last 2-3 weeks I had asked FI if something was up with them, and he said not that he had heard...little things here and there that I had either seen or heard started to make me wonder if they had broken up... I hadn''t really heard from her for a little while, but at the same time, she is in law school, and its nearing finals, so I just shrugged it off as her being busy, myself included.
We got their response card back today and he declined for her, but he is coming to the wedding...FI asked another mutual friend if he had heard anything about a break up and he said no.
She has responded yes to my bachelorette party, and if she wasn''t able to come to the wedding for whatever reason, I''m sure she would have mentioned it to me by now.(she helped me put favors together 2 months ago!)
FI is going to try and find out what the status of their relationship is. I don''t feel comfortable asking her at this point...as she hasn''t told me yet, and I don''t want to have an awkward situation happen or make her upset.
I''m not planning on un-inviting her to the party, but now I''m not sure if I should send her her own invite to the wedding...FI doesn''t want to pry into their private life(at this point none of their close friends have any idea what is going on) but they are private people, would never have anything bad to say about one another etc so they just may be going through the motions.
FI keeps saying we should just ignore it etc and let it be, but I''m going to see her in a month at my party, she just responded she was coming over the weekend...so now I''m even more confused. To make matters worse, a light bulb went off in my head and said check facebook, people always update that (lol) and it no longer says in a relationship, it says nothing at all...so that was no help. (it used to say in a relationship with X) Shes an awesome girl and has been a great friend to me. I''m new to this area and she has been so awesome showing me around, introducing me to people etc...I tend to think he wouldn''t have responded NO on her behalf unless he spoke with her, just a very confusing situation right now, and I''m not sure if any of this has even made sense.
They are both great people and we wouldn''t want to alienate either of them is I guess what I''m trying to figure out. If they did break up I completely understand why she wouldn''t want to come as his date...I just don''t know what is going on or how to handle this!
I would think after 7-8 years together it would be hard to talk about with people at first, but I know if I was responding to a wedding this way I would have given the couple an explanation before sending it so they don''t worry? I dont know, maybe I''m just making a bigger deal about this because FI and I care about both of them and we don''t know if they are ok etc.
Hopefully that made some sort of sense.
One of his closest friends from college, we''ll call him Tom, has been dating a girl, we''ll call her Amanda for the last 7-8 years.
I have always been very close to Tom as he is one of FIs closest friends, and in turn have become very close to Amanda.
When we sent out the invitations we addressed it to both of them, they practically live(d?) together, and just thought it would be appropriate, this was not a new relationship etc.
We sent out our invitations mid-march, over the last 2-3 weeks I had asked FI if something was up with them, and he said not that he had heard...little things here and there that I had either seen or heard started to make me wonder if they had broken up... I hadn''t really heard from her for a little while, but at the same time, she is in law school, and its nearing finals, so I just shrugged it off as her being busy, myself included.
We got their response card back today and he declined for her, but he is coming to the wedding...FI asked another mutual friend if he had heard anything about a break up and he said no.
She has responded yes to my bachelorette party, and if she wasn''t able to come to the wedding for whatever reason, I''m sure she would have mentioned it to me by now.(she helped me put favors together 2 months ago!)
FI is going to try and find out what the status of their relationship is. I don''t feel comfortable asking her at this point...as she hasn''t told me yet, and I don''t want to have an awkward situation happen or make her upset.
I''m not planning on un-inviting her to the party, but now I''m not sure if I should send her her own invite to the wedding...FI doesn''t want to pry into their private life(at this point none of their close friends have any idea what is going on) but they are private people, would never have anything bad to say about one another etc so they just may be going through the motions.
FI keeps saying we should just ignore it etc and let it be, but I''m going to see her in a month at my party, she just responded she was coming over the weekend...so now I''m even more confused. To make matters worse, a light bulb went off in my head and said check facebook, people always update that (lol) and it no longer says in a relationship, it says nothing at all...so that was no help. (it used to say in a relationship with X) Shes an awesome girl and has been a great friend to me. I''m new to this area and she has been so awesome showing me around, introducing me to people etc...I tend to think he wouldn''t have responded NO on her behalf unless he spoke with her, just a very confusing situation right now, and I''m not sure if any of this has even made sense.
They are both great people and we wouldn''t want to alienate either of them is I guess what I''m trying to figure out. If they did break up I completely understand why she wouldn''t want to come as his date...I just don''t know what is going on or how to handle this!
I would think after 7-8 years together it would be hard to talk about with people at first, but I know if I was responding to a wedding this way I would have given the couple an explanation before sending it so they don''t worry? I dont know, maybe I''m just making a bigger deal about this because FI and I care about both of them and we don''t know if they are ok etc.
Hopefully that made some sort of sense.
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