In two days...

[HappyNewLife]

...I''m proposing to my partner. Holy cow. I have officially stopped planning on how to actually do it, because everytime I plan something it all has to change. First I was going to propose on a picnic in Napa, but then I realized we weren''t even IN town til the next day. Then I thought I''d do it Friday night on a boat around San Francisco at Sunset, but then timing got too tight with when our plane arrives. So then I thought after dinner we''d go to the hotel, shower and while she''s showering I''d set up the room with candles so when she comes out I''m all ready to ask her.

NOW she has made all these plans for Friday night, giving me a VERY small window to plan anything. It will be land in SF, plop our bags off, dinner, MAYBE a quickie shower, then off to two concerts/clubs.

On Saturday I''m getting a tattoo and we have no official plans in the evening, but I''m sure by tomorrow she will have found 10 things for us to do, LOL. Sunday is the Gay Pride Parade, so that isn''t romantic.

I guess I''ll just somehow try to be romantic on Friday "somewhere" in there. Oye Vey. I think the fact that I''m doing it in SF (and not where we currently live, which she HATES), she will be happy. I just hope she says yes. I still have some doubts. Wish me luck! I KNOW now that she''s the one for me (and my girls).

 

[damons]

woohoo!! I was hoping to hear something from you. I posted something for you, but mistakenly posted it in RT, so you probably didn''t see it.

I am so excited for you!! I know exactly what you are going through and I wish you the best of luck. In my experience, it''s difficult to plan exactly how it will happen because there are so many variables, but trust that there will be a perfect time. Just have the ring with you and do it when it feels right. Speak from your heart and everything else will fall into place.

You love her. She loves you. That''s all that matters.

I can''t wait to hear how it all turns out.

 

[Grlsbestfrnd]

Ah lol, I''m nervous for you! I''m sure everything is going to go great and she''ll say yes and it will be one of the most wonderful days of your lives. Good luck and *DUST*! I can''t wait to hear how it goes

 

[kateydid05]

Good luck and congrats in advance! Can''t wait to hear all about how it actually goes down!

Have fun!!

 

[ArtistJess]

Yay! Good luck!

 

[kagordo4]

Date: 6/23/2010 1:40:54 PM
Author: Grlsbestfrnd
Ah lol, I''m nervous for you! I''m sure everything is going to go great and she''ll say yes and it will be one of the most wonderful days of your lives. Good luck and *DUST*! I can''t wait to hear how it goes

Ditto. I''m so nervous and excited for you, I can barely stand it : )

Get it!!

 

[Anonymous]

Hope it''s ok to post article links, and isn''t old news! Maybe you can get lucky and coordinate one of the suggested spots into the outings she''s set up. Regardless, I hope it turns out wonderfully for you and your sweetie!

http://gocalifornia.about.com/cs/sanfrancisco/a/romantic.htm

http://www.citysearch.com/list/101771

You can also use the idea that my FI tried to, but couldn''t b/c it was closed down at the time and do it on a cable car ride down to the Wharf, though I suppose that''s not really the most romantic thing without some significance for you two.

 

[HappyNewLife]

thanks Tammy. Yeah, no. the plans she made are gay (girl) clubs and a drag show I think, LOL!

 

[Anonymous]

Yeah I was thinking more along the lines of something simple like "oh I want to leave early cause I heard of this great place that I want to stop at along the way" kind of things.

 

[Luckyeshe]

GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!! ***DUST DUST DUST***

 

[crossmyfingers]

I think I''ve checked this thread four times today, each time to see whether you posted it today or a previous day, wondering how close you are to proposing! LOL!

DUST!!! Keep us updated!

 

[getting excited]

God luck!!! I am sure however you choose to propose will be perfect for the two of you!

 

[Miss Sparkly]

YAY!

 

[Jennifer W]

YAY!

Good luck honey, I hope you have a wonderful weekend - tell us how it goes, yes? Enjoy the parade, too. My friends are going to the equivalent event in Edinburgh, but I doubt it will be as exotic (or sunny) as San Francisco. Have a blast!

I don''t think she''s going to say no, but then whoever proposed without that tiny doubt in the back of their mind? I''m guessing it''s totally normal. Hugs.


Jen

 

[hawaiianorangetree]

Good luck Happy New Life!!

*******DUST!!!********

 

[Maisie]

At the risk of being shouted down for posting this I am going to do it anyway. Have you and your gf sorted out the issues you posted about just a few weeks ago? You were at the point of walking away because you felt you were constantly walking on eggshells, she vents at you, makes rude remarks and scolds you like a child....then you loathe yourself.

Are these issues resolved already? I wonder if you should wait a little while to be sure things are definitely changing for good. This is a huge step to take and you need to be sure you both feel the same. You are worth a lot more than she gives you if she makes you feel so low. I am on my own with 4 children. I would rather be this way than in a relationship where I am not loved or valued.

I only say these things because I don''t want you to rush into an engagement. You won''t fix the issues by putting a ring on her finger.

 

[Autumnovember]

Date: 6/24/2010 11:10:19 AM
Author: Maisie
At the risk of being shouted down for posting this I am going to do it anyway. Have you and your gf sorted out the issues you posted about just a few weeks ago? You were at the point of walking away because you felt you were constantly walking on eggshells, she vents at you, makes rude remarks and scolds you like a child....then you loathe yourself.


Are these issues resolved already? I wonder if you should wait a little while to be sure things are definitely changing for good. This is a huge step to take and you need to be sure you both feel the same. You are worth a lot more than she gives you if she makes you feel so low. I am on my own with 4 children. I would rather be this way than in a relationship where I am not loved or valued.


I only say these things because I don''t want you to rush into an engagement. You won''t fix the issues by putting a ring on her finger.

I was curious about the same thing.

I really believe everyone believes NOTHING but the very best and settling for something that is NOT the best can be very very damaging.

I hope everything was sorted out..

 

[Anonymous]

If I remember right, HNL did post about having a really productive conversation with her SO and they addressed the issues. I tried to find the link, but it''s easier for me to just copy and paste her post at this point in the morning. >.<

"oh, thanks for asking

We had a rough couple weeks but are on our way to sort things out for the better. We have couples counseling tomorrow and spent a very happy and relaxed weekend together. I think it will be OK and a lot of my fears are fading away. We still need to work on our communication skills but I think we are headed in the right direction. I still think she''s the one for me, we just have some work to do. "

Good luck tomorrow!!

 

[Pushin40]

Date: 6/24/2010 11:30:24 AM
Author: Autumnovember

Date: 6/24/2010 11:10:19 AM
Author: Maisie
At the risk of being shouted down for posting this I am going to do it anyway. Have you and your gf sorted out the issues you posted about just a few weeks ago? You were at the point of walking away because you felt you were constantly walking on eggshells, she vents at you, makes rude remarks and scolds you like a child....then you loathe yourself.


Are these issues resolved already? I wonder if you should wait a little while to be sure things are definitely changing for good. This is a huge step to take and you need to be sure you both feel the same. You are worth a lot more than she gives you if she makes you feel so low. I am on my own with 4 children. I would rather be this way than in a relationship where I am not loved or valued.


I only say these things because I don''t want you to rush into an engagement. You won''t fix the issues by putting a ring on her finger.

I was curious about the same thing.

I really believe everyone believes NOTHING but the very best and settling for something that is NOT the best can be very very damaging.

I hope everything was sorted out..

Umm - Ladies....talk about raining on her parade. ....

HappyNewLife had ended those postings saying they talked and worked it out. Look it up.

She is proposing this weekend, so doesn''t that tell you its resolved to the point where she is still moving forward?

This post is about being excited for what''s coming up this weekend, and she was probably not expecting to have to explain/defend herself.

And to the OP - GOOD LUCK and I wish you the very best this weekend!

 

[Autumnovember]

I'm asking a question that has a simple answer.

She was on the brink of completely ending things with her about 3 weeks ago, so I don't think this is an illegitimate question to ask. I evidently don't remember reading the post, plain and simple.

And just because she is thinking of proposing, it doesn't mean everything is perfectly fine. Many couples go into engagements without sorting out specific issues.


The question was not meant to "rain on her parade"

I had clearly said I hoped everything is sorted out. Clearly all of us want nothing but the best for each other and my feelings are the same towards her.

 

[blacksand]

Well I''ll admit I was thinking the same thing, but held back from posting for fear up upsetting you, HappyNewLife. I did read your post where you mentioned things were going better, and you were going to counseling together. That''s wonderful, and I was very happy to read it. And I do wish you all the happiness in the world. But it does seem a little quick to go from nearly breaking up a few weeks ago to engaged tomorrow. What happens if the problems resurface tomorrow?

I wish you a lot of luck, and I really don''t mean to rain on your parade, but I have to admit I''m a little worried for you.

 

[Pushin40]

Date: 6/24/2010 12:37:22 PM
Author: Autumnovember
I''m asking a question that has a simple answer.

She was on the brink of completely ending things with her about 3 weeks ago, so I don''t think this is an illegitimate question to ask. I evidently don''t remember reading the post, plain and simple.

And just because she is thinking of proposing, it doesn''t mean everything is perfectly fine. Many couples go into engagements without sorting out specific issues.


The question was not meant to ''rain on her parade''

I had clearly said I hoped everything is sorted out. Clearly all of us want nothing but the best for each other and my feelings are the same towards her.

I just thought it was inappropriate for this thread. Like one of those things where I can see why would you ask....but still....it may not be appropirate.

Thats all.

 

[Autumnovember]

Date: 6/24/2010 12:44:24 PM
Author: blacksand
Well I''ll admit I was thinking the same thing, but held back from posting for fear up upsetting you, HappyNewLife. I did read your post where you mentioned things were going better, and you were going to counseling together. That''s wonderful, and I was very happy to read it. And I do wish you all the happiness in the world. But it does seem a little quick to go from nearly breaking up a few weeks ago to engaged tomorrow. What happens if the problems resurface tomorrow?


I wish you a lot of luck, and I really don''t mean to rain on your parade, but I have to admit I''m a little worried for you.

My thoughts, exactly.

I *DO* hope everything is well and I truly hope you have a fantastic time surprising her.

 

[Maisie]

Date: 6/24/2010 12:13:25 PM
Author: Pushin40

Umm - Ladies....talk about raining on her parade. ....

HappyNewLife had ended those postings saying they talked and worked it out. Look it up.

She is proposing this weekend, so doesn''t that tell you its resolved to the point where she is still moving forward?

This post is about being excited for what''s coming up this weekend, and she was probably not expecting to have to explain/defend herself.

And to the OP - GOOD LUCK and I wish you the very best this weekend!

I didn''t realise that I was only allowed to post something that you find appropriate. I shall remember myself in future and only post things that agree with the OP.

 

[risingsun]

Date: 6/24/2010 12:45:58 PM
Author: Pushin40

Date: 6/24/2010 12:37:22 PM
Author: Autumnovember
I''m asking a question that has a simple answer.

She was on the brink of completely ending things with her about 3 weeks ago, so I don''t think this is an illegitimate question to ask. I evidently don''t remember reading the post, plain and simple.

And just because she is thinking of proposing, it doesn''t mean everything is perfectly fine. Many couples go into engagements without sorting out specific issues.


The question was not meant to ''rain on her parade''

I had clearly said I hoped everything is sorted out. Clearly all of us want nothing but the best for each other and my feelings are the same towards her.

I just thought it was inappropriate for this thread. Like one of those things where I can see why would you ask....but still....it may not be appropirate.

Thats all.

Maisie is a very caring person. She is asking out of concern. Where else would she post this? Resolving problems takes time. I hope that HappyNewLife has taken the time and done the work required before making the commitment to become engaged. This does come from a place of caring.

 

[Autumnovember]

I''m going to say just one one more thing, and then I''m done with this thread.....I could only hope that the fellow ladies here would question me in this kind of situation instead of acting fake. Imagine all the wrong choices we would make if there weren''t people around us who questioned our actions and were looking out for our best interest?

 

[risingsun]

Date: 6/24/2010 1:11:32 PM
Author: Autumnovember
I''m going to say just one one more thing, and then I''m done with this thread.....I could only hope that the fellow ladies here would question me in this kind of situation instead of acting fake. Imagine all the wrong choices we would make if there weren''t people around us who questioned our actions and were looking out for our best interest?

Well said!

 

[Pushin40]

OK, Let's put this into perpective.....I was just making a comment with my own feelings, as well.

This isn't a big deal, Girls.
Obviously I am not telling anyone what is allowed or not, or saying anyone isn't coming form a good place.

Nor would I be "fake".

 

[Maisie]

Date: 6/24/2010 12:45:58 PM
Author: Pushin40

I just thought it was inappropriate for this thread. Like one of those things where I can see why would you ask....but still....it may not be appropirate.

Thats all.

You can''t decide what is or isn''t appropriate for a thread. This is a public forum and not everyone is going to agree with every post here.

 

[Pushin40]

I don't even know what you are trying to argue about.
Maybe that I can't post MY opinion on what I THINK?
Um - yeah, I can. You are right, it is a public forum.

Whatever

HNL - sorry for the nonsense in this thread!!!