If you were to go "belly up" tomorrow ...

[Dancing Fire]

what will he do with your jewelry collection? sell it? save it for #2?

 

[armywife13]

Hopefully keep it to give to our two daughters.

 

[ForteKitty]

Hell no! #2 will already get half the house, and now she wants my jewelry too? Pfft.

All my jewelry were purchased by me, prior to marrying him, including my big oec. Every piece I own is inventoried and my will dictates where each piece goes. Mom will get the bulk of it, then my sister, because I know they will love and treasure my jewelry. If I have a kid, something will probably go to my kid, but not all of it because I can't be sure he/she will appreciate it. His mom, sister, and SIL will also get quite a few pieces. The rest will go to friends and their kids. My inventory spreadsheet also indicates specs, paperwork, what I paid, and what secondhand market value should be IF they wish to sell. That way they won't get ripped off.

My husband probably doesn't even know what I have, and he doesn't really care. He just knows that there are boxes at the bank and he doesn't have access to it, haha. I tried to go over everything with him once, and his eyes glazed over. Everything apparently looked the same to him. He did ask why I had so many of the same things, which made me realize that I needed to pare down and simplify things if something were to happen. Over the past two years, I've slowly sold off some smaller pieces and used those funds to pay for bigger pieces. Easier to give away one big piece rather than 5 smaller pieces!

Some people may think it's morbid, but it's wise to have your finances in order. It's better to be prepared. I've had a will and medical directive prepared since I was 18, and I update all my financial records before every trip. My family knows where I keep all my documents in case something happens. Hope they never have to use it!

 

[Trekkie]

Hell no! #2 will already get half the house, and now she wants my jewelry too? Pfft.

All my jewelry were purchased by me, prior to marrying him, including my big oec. Every piece I own is inventoried and my will dictates where each piece goes. Mom will get the bulk of it, then my sister, because I know they will love and treasure my jewelry. If I have a kid, something will probably go to my kid, but not all of it because I can't be sure he/she will appreciate it. His mom, sister, and SIL will also get quite a few pieces. The rest will go to friends and their kids. My inventory spreadsheet also indicates specs, paperwork, what I paid, and what secondhand market value should be IF they wish to sell. That way they won't get ripped off.

My husband probably doesn't even know what I have, and he doesn't really care. He just knows that there are boxes at the bank and he doesn't have access to it, haha. I tried to go over everything with him once, and his eyes glazed over. Everything apparently looked the same to him. He did ask why I had so many of the same things, which made me realize that I needed to pare down and simplify things if something were to happen. Over the past two years, I've slowly sold off some smaller pieces and used those funds to pay for bigger pieces. Easier to give away one big piece rather than 5 smaller pieces!

Some people may think it's morbid, but it's wise to have your finances in order. It's better to be prepared. I've had a will and medical directive prepared since I was 18, and I update all my financial records before every trip. My family knows where I keep all my documents in case something happens. Hope they never have to use it!

I never realised the importance of this until my mother died a couple of years ago. Her financial affairs were a complete and utter mess. Until then I thought "oh, well, I have insurance and my insurance details who gets what percentage when I die and my will takes care of the rest". It sounds so stupid now, but it didn't actually occur to me until then that people actually need to know where to find this information. Now, everything is neatly filed away along with a list of whom to contact (siblings and friends overseas etc) and their contact details if I croak unexpectedly.

To answer DF's question... The jewellery I inherited from my mother goes to my brother so that he can pass it on to his daughters/granddaughters (not wife!) one day. The rest of my stuff will go to my one year old great-niece, with the exception of one of my 7 stone diamond bands, which I would like my brother to give to his eldest daughter or granddaughter one day.

I cannot fathom that my great-niece or my brother's daughters or granddaughters ( I guess that would make them my great-nieces too?) wouldn't be into jewellery and sparkles. I'm a third generation sparkle freak and it seems that the itch gets worse every generation. Having said that, if they are not into jewellery they have my blessing to sell the lot and use the money for something that will bring them joy.

I'm pretty sure that's how many of us now have the estate pieces we do - a friend or family member received it, wasn't interested and decided to pass it on to someone who would love it.

DancingFire - you've often said that when your wife goes, her jewellery will be split between your two daughters. Who will decide who gets what?

 

[justginger]

Despite excellent intentions, I still haven't had a will prepared -- when I realized it was necessary, after the recent passing of a family member, it was just in time for me to rush back to uni. At 70-80 hours/week of work and studying, I flat don't have the time to do it right now. I have written things up pre-emptively, so DH would know what to do with it all. When my next uni break is on, I'll sit down with a lawyer to have wills and directives done for the both of us.

I have my jewellery split between my nephews (biological) and nieces (on DH's side). At this point, the girls are lined up to get more than the boys -- fair or unfair. I know and adore our nieces; I don't know what sort of people my nephews will end up marrying, and gifting inherited pieces to. As they get older, and have serious partners (wives), I will revise the will accordingly. I want to ensure the pieces I really treasure will stay in the family.

 

[missy]

We have had a will since we got married. Everything but the jewelry gets split 50/50 between my family (1 sister and 2 children) and his (2 brothers and their 4 children). My family gets 50% of our estate and his family gets 50%.

My biologic nieces and sister get all my jewelry but I have not divided up who gets what because that will be left up to them. And I fully trust they will be able to do that in a civilized manner. My family is not one to fight over material possessions anyway and I know it would be divided in a fair manner.

I don't think it is morbid to plan ahead because life always has a way of happening despite the best laid plans so you can never be too prepared for eventualities like this unfortunately. Having a will, powers of attorney, medical directive, estate executors, etc is important to do for peace of mind.

 

[JewelFreak]

DH says he'll throw all those silly pebbles out into the back yard. I hope he's kidding! If any of my nieces want anything, they are welcome to whatever speaks to them. I am going to (gotta get it done!) take photos of each stone & piece of jewelry & attach to my will a list of what each is, with a recommendation that they be appraised before anything is sold.

In the long run, I don't really care; I won't be wearing it anymore. I love the estate jewelery I have & think of the woman who loved it before me. If mine ends up in a similar store, I'll be happy to have someone else enjoy it.

 

[Circe]

Re: If you were to go "belly up" tomorrow ...

Outside of a few favored pieces, I'm leaving a list of good auction houses for him. I have too much stuff for it to be a joy and not a burden to any non-jewelry person, and the husband could make enough investing or for future generations to choose their own. And that way, less chance of people butchering vintage pieces to keep the sentimental value of stones in settings not to their taste!

 

[Dee*Jay]

I have made it clear to the person who will administer my estate (assuming he doesn't kick the bucket first) that I want my jewelry sold, the proceeds split evenly, with 1/2 going to the Anti Cruelty Society in The Demon's name and 1/2 going to PAWS in Oscar's name. I may (I hope!) have more furry children along the way before I go to the great beyond, and I will revise the plan accordingly.

If my niece (who is coming into this world any time now) expresses an interest in anything I might leave her a piece, but absent that it's all going to shelters.

 

[Dancing Fire]

[quote="Trekkie|1396943109|

DancingFire - you've often said that when your wife goes, her jewellery will be split between your two daughters. Who will decide who gets what?[/quote]


If she goes first (but I don't think so) i'll remount her 3ct into a gent's ring... . Her jewelry will be split evenly in value b/t our two daughters, and I have already gave her some idea what my watches are worth just in case... so that she doesn't give it away for nothing.

 

[chrono]

Almost all my collection was purchased using my earnings, so they will be given to my children.

 

[Logan Sapphire]

It would go to my children and my twin sister- the wedding/ering would be saved for my kids and then my sister could pick something sentimental for herself. I don't think I'd want my ering/wedding ring to go to my son, though, as I wouldn't want him to give it to his wife and then during a breakup, she'd keep it.

 

[Sparklelu]

I have an inventory list thanks to Suze Orman that divvies the loot up between my three kids. My DD will end up with the lions share, but each of the boys will get a decent size diamond, and a pair of diamond earrings. My DD does not wear much now, but I'm pretty sure she will change her mind.
I will let them decide who gets it from there!

 

[manderz]

I don't know. Hubby would probably sell it, or maybe pass on a few pieces. It would be up to him, and I think it might be a bit of a $$ grab for my mom, though I hope to avoid that.

 

[movie zombie]

DF, who gets your watches? I see you've given your wife an idea of the worth but what happens if you both go at the same time? is it in your will so the girls won't fight over them?

 

[isaku5]

There is no way in hell that I want my daughter to inherit one piece of my jewelry. I have to get busy and include the necessary codicil in my will.

It will state that both granddaughters will share my 'jewels'. First, everything that's left will have an independent appraisal. After that there will be a dollar value which will be divided in half. Each girl will be entitled to half the value in jewels or if there is a difference, money will fix the inequality. In the case of a 'feud', all jewellery will be sold and each girl will receive half the proceeds.

If necessary, all proceeds will be donated to the SPCA.

For special occasions along the way, I have been gifting each girl with pieces from my collection.

Second wife???? Not a chance.

 

[momhappy]

I'm quite certain that he would give it to our daughter.

 

[VRBeauty]

This is a really good question, and I appreciate reading everybody's responses. I don't have any direct heirs, and only a small amount of my jewelry has much value... but I do need to give some thought to the distribution of that small amount! Sparkelu and Fortekitty - thanks for telling us about your jewelry inventories. I think it is time for me to put together something like that. If nothing else, it might spur me to start selling or giving away the things I no longer use!

 

[packrat]

Save it for London. The wedding set for sure. The two colored stone rings she can decide if she wants to keep or give one or both to Trapper's wife when he gets married, if she's into jewelry.

 

[LLJsmom]

GOES TO MY SON AND DAUGHTER. HMMM, MEANS I NEED ANOTHER 2-3 CARAT DIAMOND. GOTTA BE FAIR...

 

[AprilBaby]

I will get cremated wearing it all!

But seriously, all to my only daughter to decide how to split it.

 

[ForteKitty]

I don't think I'd leave anything important for my (potential) son to give to his spouse. Divorce is so common these days, who knows if it'll stay in the family should they separate?

 

[SB621]

I don't think I'd leave anything important for my (potential) son to give to his spouse. Divorce is so common these days, who knows if it'll stay in the family should they separate?

Well there are ways around this. My DH's family was very specific that if my DH and I terminated our marriage anything I was given or inherited from his family must be given back or handed down to my daughter in terms of jewelry. We never did legal paperwork but I know others have to sign on the dotted line before they marry.


Anyhow in regards to the OP's question my will states my DD gets everything from my personal collection as well as both Grandmother's collections on both sides of the family. However my DS gets my 2ct MRB as well as my eternity band with the same stipulation that I had. If they divorce the jewelry goes with my DS.

 

[Dancing Fire]

DF, who gets your watches? I see you've given your wife an idea of the worth but what happens if you both go at the same time? is it in your will so the girls won't fight over them?

yes, everything is split down the middle b/t our 2 daughters. I have had try to hint about the value of my watches so that they don't give it away just in case.

 

[Dancing Fire]

GOES TO MY SON AND DAUGHTER. HMMM, MEANS I NEED ANOTHER 2-3 CARAT DIAMOND. GOTTA BE FAIR...

that's how I feel too!..

 

[movie zombie]

There is no way in hell that I want my daughter to inherit one piece of my jewelry. .................:

glad to know I'm not alone........

 

[diamondringlover]

he would hoard it...he cant throw or give anything away

 

[Sky56]

Someone will get lucky someday. I hope to die when I am old, and maybe there is a currently unborn person who will someday be a loving nurse for me who is also a jewelry freak. I am childless and my current heirs are quite disinterested in jewelry. Of course, my husband will inherit my stuff, but he seems to think I'll outlive him though I am older. I have no health problems and he has several, that is why he thinks that way, but he easily can be wrong. What I care about is someone loving and appreciating my stuff, I don't care who it is actually.

 

[Sky56]

If he outlives me and he has a #2, and she loves jewelry, she can have it! She has to be a jewelry nut...indifferent person who would sell it....no!

 

[HeartingDiamonds]

My 2 girls are only minimally interested in my jewelry at this time (older one wanted a itty-bitty 5-stone band last year, which I got her, and I could not get either one of them to wear diamond earrings, no matter how dainty) but I am so hoping that would change (they are 20 and 15 now).

I have told them both (hubby too) that my jewelry needs to be appraised and based on that, have "points" be assigned to each piece. They can then divvy up the loot using said point system. I feel this would best ensure fairness and more importantly, ensure they get the pieces they would wear!

But the first commandment is this: THOU SHALL NOT GIFT MY JEWELS TO THY (possibly) 19-YO SECOND WIFE.

Or I shall visit him from the grave every night. And he knows me enough to know that I will find a way to stand by the foot of his bed every night too!