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i think he''s mentally/emotionally ready....

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dec2410

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Sep 5, 2007
Messages
499
so.....i haven''t been expected an engagement really, because my SO''s still in school. but i think it might be sooner than i''ve been thinking...

let me give you guys a little history...my SO was working when we started dating but last year decided to go back to school to finish his bachelors. up until now, he''s been very shy about talking about engagement/marriage because every time we talk about our future, he gets stuck in the past and how he''s wasted so many years of his life just messing around (before he met me). it isn''t the actual marriage talk that made him upset but more the idea that if he hadn''t wasted so much time when he was younger, he would currently be in a different position. he thinks that if he had gotten his act together sooner, then he would''ve already been a position (with job stability and such) to marry me NOW. i constantly remind him that we would''ve never met if he had made different decisions in the past, and that especially with today''s economy, none of that stuff is really a given anymore. so i''ve almost completely backed off on the marriage talk. we talk about our future generally and about our lives together, but not specifically about getting engaged or married. i want to be sensitive to how he feels and i''m ok with waiting because if one of us in the relationship isn''t ready, then we, together, aren''t ready.

soooo...fast forward to the last few weeks. lately, he hasn''t been so shy about talking about getting married. one of his close friends just bought a ring to give to his gf. SO was telling me how excited his friend was to move on to that next stage in life and how he''s understanding that feeling now. just a few days ago, he was saying how he''s starting to get antsy cuz he wants that next chapter in his life to start sooner rather than later. he kept saying how our life together is gonna happen a lot sooner than i think and that he won''t keep me waiting much longer. he keeps saying "i''ve been thinking a lot about our future..." but won''t really elaborate. haha. he just has that i''m thinking-look until he says again...i''ve been thinking a lot about our future. hahaha. its so nice and refreshing to finally be on the same page as my SO.

so this is all greattttt news for me. still, i don''t expect "soon" to be next week, but i''m expecting by the end of the year. i''m so excited that he''s so excited about our future life together.

we''re finally on the same page!!!
 

sammyj

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Aug 28, 2008
Messages
1,247
Yay!!! This is great news! It sounds like you''ve got a great perspective on things.
 

NakedFinger

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jan 8, 2009
Messages
690
Waiting- Congratulations! That''s awesome and so exciting!


Its an amazing thing when they hit that stage. Its a subtle change they probably dont realize that are portraying, but to the women who love them its everything!

I rememeber when I first realized my SO was ready, I told my mother...something has changed in him, the way he acts, looks at me, etc...like I man excited and ready to get married.
Not a "bf" anymore!

DUST your way!
 

mochamamasita

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jan 14, 2009
Messages
110
Congrats. It doesn''t sound like you''ll have to wait too much longer.


lol. He sounds like me because I''m always saying, "I''ve been thinking about our future" to my boyfriend.
 

Definitely. Maybe

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jan 12, 2009
Messages
582
Date: 3/6/2009 11:28:57 AM
Author:waitingpatiently
so.....i haven''t been expected an engagement really, because my SO''s still in school. but i think it might be sooner than i''ve been thinking...

let me give you guys a little history...my SO was working when we started dating but last year decided to go back to school to finish his bachelors. up until now, he''s been very shy about talking about engagement/marriage because every time we talk about our future, he gets stuck in the past and how he''s wasted so many years of his life just messing around (before he met me). it isn''t the actual marriage talk that made him upset but more the idea that if he hadn''t wasted so much time when he was younger, he would currently be in a different position. he thinks that if he had gotten his act together sooner, then he would''ve already been a position (with job stability and such) to marry me NOW. i constantly remind him that we would''ve never met if he had made different decisions in the past, and that especially with today''s economy, none of that stuff is really a given anymore. so i''ve almost completely backed off on the marriage talk. we talk about our future generally and about our lives together, but not specifically about getting engaged or married. i want to be sensitive to how he feels and i''m ok with waiting because if one of us in the relationship isn''t ready, then we, together, aren''t ready.

soooo...fast forward to the last few weeks. lately, he hasn''t been so shy about talking about getting married. one of his close friends just bought a ring to give to his gf. SO was telling me how excited his friend was to move on to that next stage in life and how he''s understanding that feeling now. just a few days ago, he was saying how he''s starting to get antsy cuz he wants that next chapter in his life to start sooner rather than later. he kept saying how our life together is gonna happen a lot sooner than i think and that he won''t keep me waiting much longer. he keeps saying ''i''ve been thinking a lot about our future...'' but won''t really elaborate. haha. he just has that i''m thinking-look until he says again...i''ve been thinking a lot about our future. hahaha. its so nice and refreshing to finally be on the same page as my SO.

so this is all greattttt news for me. still, i don''t expect ''soon'' to be next week, but i''m expecting by the end of the year. i''m so excited that he''s so excited about our future life together.

we''re finally on the same page!!!
I think this is soooo true and I think so many LIWs tend to forget this, especially when they''re ready NOW. I am so glad you and BF are on the same page now, that really is exciting!
 

somegirl932

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 2, 2009
Messages
311
Ahhhhh! Totally awesome! It''s so nice when you guys are on the same page.


My boyfriend had been kind of eye-rolly and joke-y when we talked about engagement and marriage before, but he''s started being really serious and telling me how much he wants to put a ring on my finger when it comes up now.

I''m thinking our timelines are about the same... isn''t it exciting???


(And I totally get what you mean about even if *you* might be ready, if he''s not, then it''s not right for you as a couple.)
 

SailorsSweet<3

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Sep 10, 2008
Messages
723
Date: 3/6/2009 5:48:53 PM
Author: Definitely, Maybe
Date: 3/6/2009 11:28:57 AM

Author:waitingpatiently

so.....i haven''t been expected an engagement really, because my SO''s still in school. but i think it might be sooner than i''ve been thinking...


let me give you guys a little history...my SO was working when we started dating but last year decided to go back to school to finish his bachelors. up until now, he''s been very shy about talking about engagement/marriage because every time we talk about our future, he gets stuck in the past and how he''s wasted so many years of his life just messing around (before he met me). it isn''t the actual marriage talk that made him upset but more the idea that if he hadn''t wasted so much time when he was younger, he would currently be in a different position. he thinks that if he had gotten his act together sooner, then he would''ve already been a position (with job stability and such) to marry me NOW. i constantly remind him that we would''ve never met if he had made different decisions in the past, and that especially with today''s economy, none of that stuff is really a given anymore. so i''ve almost completely backed off on the marriage talk. we talk about our future generally and about our lives together, but not specifically about getting engaged or married. i want to be sensitive to how he feels and i''m ok with waiting because if one of us in the relationship isn''t ready, then we, together, aren''t ready.


soooo...fast forward to the last few weeks. lately, he hasn''t been so shy about talking about getting married. one of his close friends just bought a ring to give to his gf. SO was telling me how excited his friend was to move on to that next stage in life and how he''s understanding that feeling now. just a few days ago, he was saying how he''s starting to get antsy cuz he wants that next chapter in his life to start sooner rather than later. he kept saying how our life together is gonna happen a lot sooner than i think and that he won''t keep me waiting much longer. he keeps saying ''i''ve been thinking a lot about our future...'' but won''t really elaborate. haha. he just has that i''m thinking-look until he says again...i''ve been thinking a lot about our future. hahaha. its so nice and refreshing to finally be on the same page as my SO.


so this is all greattttt news for me. still, i don''t expect ''soon'' to be next week, but i''m expecting by the end of the year. i''m so excited that he''s so excited about our future life together.


we''re finally on the same page!!!
I think this is soooo true and I think so many LIWs tend to forget this, especially when they''re ready NOW. I am so glad you and BF are on the same page now, that really is exciting!

Ditto Ditto Ditto - Good for you waitingpatiently and very exciting
 

dec2410

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Sep 5, 2007
Messages
499
yayy! i''m super excited. but still trying not to get too crazy about it. my LIWitis has caused a few arguments in the past and i don''t want that to happen again. i was one of those LIW who was ready fairly early into our relationship and was itching to get married...thus, now i''ve been a LIW longer than i haven''t been in our relationship. haha. i definitely lost sight of the US in the relationship and pushed getting married because I was ready...totally losing sight of his needs and essentially OUR needs. so i backed off on the engagement talk a few months ago, and it seems like that just hit a switch in his head. hahaha. how ironic.

anyway......thanks for all the lovely comments ladies and keep sending dust this wayyy!
 
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