I swore I wouldn''t ask....

[LesserOfWeevils]

So when I made the decision that it was time to propose to my love I started to roll around the idea of diamonds and rings. I''m a researcher for big ticket items like cars/tvs/etc. So I turned to my old love the internet and quickly became acquainted with what everyone was saying. I found pricescope and its treasure trove of knowledge and so I''ve been reading everything I can find as it pertains to my personal needs for about a month now. And you know what, with all that shimmering information right in my face I thought, I won''t bother people on the forums, everything I need is right here.... But then RL stepped in.

Initially I set myself a budget of around 8k with about 9k budgeted overall for the ring + stone. Taking into account all I had learned of the HCA and advice I''ve read I set the parameters of what I was looking for:

1. Round brilliant cut center stone.
2. H or above color, S1 or above clarity, carats depending on price constraint.
3. Priority above other factors is quality of cut as I wanted maximum sparkle/fire

So I looked through all the commonly listed vendors and found some options in the H&A proprietary to each vendor and found that I was usually coming in around maybe 1.2 carat weight. Some color or clarity differences here and there but fairly consistent. I was shooting for Ex, Ex, Ex, Vg on the cut adviser which was usually around a 1.6 or so.

So after all this time I have my ideas set out and I decided it was time to visit the RL shops to compare my theory to what my eyes could see. Well at the jewelry stores near my home I asked for examples of different colors, cut grades, clarity''s, etc. And do you know what... I couldn''t tell a smidgen of difference half the time. I just literally couldn''t; Try though I might. That "I" color looked just like an H or even a G. The SI1s I looked at all appeared "eye clean" to me. Even the SI2s were mostly totally clean to my ignorant and untrained eye. What gives? I was looking for at least -some- discernible difference to my lay person eyes?

But no. Perhaps I am simply not able to detect perfections and imperfections due to being so new to this. Or maybe it was the jewelry store lighting? I did my best to lay stones out side by side on white paper I had brought and to carry them around to look in different lighting I could find, even in some cases asking if we could step outside. I looked under the loupe and could find obvious differences but to an unaided eye I was amazed at how they all looked remarkably similar.

So this threw a monkey wrench in my best laid plans. Should I perhaps sacrifice some of my ideals and go bigger? I want the best suited diamond for the money obviously. I can find 1.5 carat stones near my price range on several vendor sites that are around I, SI1 and cut adviser ratings of about 2. The ones I saw in person, I just couldn''t tell differences.

My GF has no idea this is coming but we have discussed rings in passing over the years. I think she would be happy with anything, but I personally want something really nice for her. She deserves a ring that matches her beauty. So I implore all of you that are so much more knowledgeable than I... What do you think is my best course of action? Would you be more pleased with a smaller but more perfect stone, or a larger and less perfect stone? If I went larger in those parameters, is it likely she would even notice? Neither of us are experts on these sorts of things?

Suggestions would be most welcome.

Finally I''d like to thank everyone that posts here as I''ve found this place to be a veritable treasure trove of real world knowledge and a beautiful sounding board for the confused among us, such as myself. Although I had promised myself not to trouble anyone, that perhaps the answers already existed, I find myself unable to turn to your expertise.

Thank you.

 

[IceExplorer]

I'm glad I'm not the only one! I had difficulty finding diamonds of higher quality in my RL search.
I apparently have a keen eye for color so I went with F. I really could tell the difference when comparing or individually. Provided it was an eye-clean diamond - I couldn't tell any difference between VVS1 or SI1 with my naked eye.

After I compared my pricescope.com knowledge with actual specimens here is what I decided:

I decided to find the sweet spot of where quality and value meet (for me).

That ended up being: F-SI1 top notch performing H&A
I decided I would prefer to have performance over size so I maintained ideal specifications.
By doing so I came in below my intended budget. Mind you, my budget was set BEFORE I found Pricescope.

Also, all of my knowledge (RL and Pricescope) was best pulled together when I met with the 3rd Party appraiser. I wish I would have met with an appraiser BEFORE my search began. I'd recommend doing that to anyone.

~ just my 2 cents!

Good luck!

 

[jet2ks]

I LoW, welcome to PS. Thank you for sharing your story.

I'll try to address a few things.

* Jewelry store lighting is incredibly deceptive and designed to show off even poorly cut stones by flooding the area with so much light that the ability of the diamond to reflect isn't apparent. It is good to move out of that light, but you still need to know what to look for. Additionally, a diamond performs differently when clean vs. slightly oily/dirty and a diamond with excellent proportions will still be sparkly after wearing all day and the accumulated grime, while a less well cut stone will lose its sparkle in the same conditions.

* HCA is an elimination tool only--used to weed out diamonds that are less likely to be top performers. Anything scoring under 2 is very likely to be a good performing stone and worthy of further evaluation and this is the only target score, not a specific number. The tool cannot see the diamonds so additional information such as Idealscope images are required after intial sorting using the HCA.

* There are many high performing diamonds that are not H&A and these will usually cost a bit less because of the price premium placed on the H&A label.

* Color and clarity sensitivity varies between people, so you need to find what works for you and your GF. I color is still very white in a well cut stone, though more of a warm white than icy white. Also keep in mind that the person wearing the diamond will be seeing it everyday and an inclusion that is marginally visible when looking at the stone briefly may be seen at a later date, and once seen inclusions tend to draw the eye--the person focuses on the one speck instead of the beauty of the diamond as a whole.

Make sure to get a well cut stone. It will perform better in a variety of lighting and the price increase for better cut is not that much compared to increasing color or clarity and getting a poorly cut diamond. Also, a well cut stone will appear larger than a poorly cut one due to increased light return. Your budget will allow you to get a diamond that is much larger than average, so I wouldn't sacrifice on cut in any way.

 

[LesserOfWeevils]

Date: 1/28/2010 1:24:51 PM
Author: jet2ks
I LoW, welcome to PS. Thank you for sharing your story.


I''ll try to address a few things.


* Jewelry store lighting is incredibly deceptive and designed to show off even poorly cut stones by flooding the area with so much light that the ability of the diamond to reflect isn''t apparent. It is good to move out of that light, but you still need to know what to look for. Additionally, a diamond performs differently when clean vs. slightly oily/dirty and a diamond with excellent proportions will still be sparkly after wearing all day and the accumulated grime, while a less well cut stone will lose its sparkle in the same conditions.


* HCA is an elimination tool only--used to weed out diamonds that are less likely to be top performers. Anything scoring under 2 is very likely to be a good performing stone and worthy of further evaluation and this is the only target score, not a specific number. The tool cannot see the diamonds so additional information such as Idealscope images are required after intial sorting using the HCA.


* There are many high performing diamonds that are not H&A and these will usually cost a bit less because of the price premium placed on the H&A label.


* Color and clarity sensitivity varies between people, so you need to find what works for you and your GF. I color is still very white in a well cut stone, though more of a warm white than icy white. Also keep in mind that the person wearing the diamond will be seeing it everyday and an inclusion that is marginally visible when looking at the stone briefly may be seen at a later date, and once seen inclusions tend to draw the eye--the person focuses on the one speck instead of the beauty of the diamond as a whole.


Make sure to get a well cut stone. It will perform better in a variety of lighting and the price increase for better cut is not that much compared to increasing color or clarity and getting a poorly cut diamond. Also, a well cut stone will appear larger than a poorly cut one due to increased light return. Your budget will allow you to get a diamond that is much larger than average, so I wouldn''t sacrifice on cut in any way.

Thanks so much for your reply.

To clarify a bit, I do know that the HCA is just an elimination tool and have been using it as such. Not really intending it as a metric of selection but more an additional point to show people what I have been looking at.

I do see what you mean about not sacrificing on the cut. As I said I set it as my top metric for the diamond initially. So essentially I suppose I''m asking...

Would you go with an ideal cut H&A at around 1.2-1.3 or an GIA rated excellent cut that doesn''t carry the online vendors top quality rating for H&A at around 1.5 weight? Essentially is the premium price paid for that worth the extra tenth of a carat weight? Even though the cut quality price differential is not so much as a 4C grade change, it is still a price. And I am working within a limited budget range so clearly I must make trade offs. The goal is finding the right balance.

As far as the inclusions go, I think after looking in person, anything that is "eye clean" will be perfectly alright with me.

The color issue seems to have many answers. I''m thinking "I" is good enough for me set in platinum or white gold but I''m open to others saying otherwise. Are the cut qualities I''m looking at high enough to cover the "flaws" in an "I" colored stone? That being at least a GIA excellent cut but perhaps not quite up to the online vendors trademarked highest level.

I suppose this is a very subjective and personal question and realize answers will be in that vein and I''m willing to accept them that way. Just looking for what the consensus might be.

 

[whitby_2773]

hi LofW

ditto everything jet2ks said.

a girlfriend of mine has just become engaged with a ring which is even lower clarity than you're looking at. however, it's so white and so incredibly well cut, that all you ever see from it is sparkle, sparkle, sparkle! i mean 'people across the *room* commenting on it in low light' kind of sparkle - to say nothing of what it looks like in full sunlight!

i think you could safely look at SI2 stones, so long as a) you could either see them in person yourself, so you could be sure they were eye clean or b) you were working with a good vendor who could assure you of same.

if you're thinking about setting in yellow gold, i think you can also look at well cut I/J colored stones. be aware, tho, these stones show slight color when you tilt them, so personally, i stay away from white gold/platinum settings when buying warmer colored stones for this reason. this is preference, tho, so you'll need to check this out yourself.

all that to say, cut really *does* make a difference! you might want to see what you can find in the G SI2 range. do you have an online vendor you like or are working with? this might be your next port of call...

if i was setting in yellow gold, and i had your budget, i'd be looking at *this* stone, which is *just* under 1.3ct...

link

just a thought - and good luck!

ETA. plenty of people would set a beautiful stone like this in plat/white gold, so this really IS something you need to work out yourself. and i dont think the jump from 1.3 to 1.5 is worth sacrificing your H&A cut for. but as you said - this is definitely a personal opinion. if you compare a 1.3 to a 1.5, the difference is not easy to see - around 0.3mm, tho this varies depending on the cut.

 

[rhbgirl24]

Welcome to PS.

Just remember that jewelery stores have lighting that make almost everything look good. It is much better to go on actual certs than to test your eye with things like that. In that bright light you may not be able to see crystals or feathers in the stone that she may notice every day.

As for color, that is personal preference. A lot of people on here have a general preference for a warmer color stone, and they are very appealing on many skin tones. I personally like icy white and have an E, but would def go warmer for a necklace or earrings. All are equally beautiful, not one better than the other. So what do you like? You may not be able to see the difference in that type of lighting. Also look at the diamond from the side, not straight on to see color difference.

You are definitely right that I would put cut above almost all else.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

Congrats Weevils!!!!

Store lighting is very deceptive so try to see the diamond in other lighting, under the table, in the store bathroom, outside in natural light if they''ll let you...

To tell the color of diamonds, hold them against a white sheet of paper and look at them from the side. If they are ideal cut, it could be very difficult to see the color when the diamond is face up (like in a setting) that''s why people say it "faces up white"

It''s totally personal preference what makes up your sweet spot.

If you are giong with a diamond that is cut well, it will be beautiful no matter what, it will just have a slightly different personality depending on what you use as your selection criteria.

For me (b/c I like size, I would get a G SI1 or eyeclean SI2 if I wanted an icy white look

or a J/K SI1 or eyeclean SI2 if I was ok with white with occassional ivory color.

But, it''s totally personal preference.

 

[ChunkyCushionLover]

Date: 1/28/2010 1:24:51 PM
Author: jet2ks
I LoW, welcome to PS. Thank you for sharing your story.

I'll try to address a few things.

* Jewelry store lighting is incredibly deceptive and designed to show off even poorly cut stones by flooding the area with so much light that the ability of the diamond to reflect isn't apparent. It is good to move out of that light, but you still need to know what to look for. Additionally, a diamond performs differently when clean vs. slightly oily/dirty and a diamond with excellent proportions will still be sparkly after wearing all day and the accumulated grime, while a less well cut stone will lose its sparkle in the same conditions.

* HCA is an elimination tool only--used to weed out diamonds that are less likely to be top performers. Anything scoring under 2 is very likely to be a good performing stone and worthy of further evaluation and this is the only target score, not a specific number. The tool cannot see the diamonds so additional information such as Idealscope images are required after intial sorting using the HCA.

* There are many high performing diamonds that are not H&A and these will usually cost a bit less because of the price premium placed on the H&A label.

* Color and clarity sensitivity varies between people, so you need to find what works for you and your GF. I color is still very white in a well cut stone, though more of a warm white than icy white. Also keep in mind that the person wearing the diamond will be seeing it everyday and an inclusion that is marginally visible when looking at the stone briefly may be seen at a later date, and once seen inclusions tend to draw the eye--the person focuses on the one speck instead of the beauty of the diamond as a whole.

Make sure to get a well cut stone. It will perform better in a variety of lighting and the price increase for better cut is not that much compared to increasing color or clarity and getting a poorly cut diamond. Also, a well cut stone will appear larger than a poorly cut one due to increased light return. Your budget will allow you to get a diamond that is much larger than average, so I wouldn't sacrifice on cut in any way.

Ditto to everything Jet said it was said so eloquently nothing much to add.
The main thing you need to decide is do you want a perfect hearts and arrows stone like a branded cut like ACA or something near ideal which is slightly bigger, one color higher or slightly cheaper.
Some options by no means exhaustive:

Option 1:
http://www.whiteflash.com/diamonds/Diamond_Details.aspx?idno=2145432 (WF A Cut Above, top optics in a round, Eye Clean, Nice Faceup spread 7.45mmX7.48mm 1.53 I VS2 like a 1.6 because of only 60.6% depth) Under 11k with wire Discount.

Option 2:
http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/H-SI1-Ideal-Cut-Round-Diamond-1254340.asp (Have to check if its Eye Clean Ask Vendor, 7.54mmX 7.57mm 1.65 H SI1) $10,270 HCA 1.4 in ideal TIC, you should request idealscope images to check for leakage.

Option 3:
http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/I-SI1-Ideal-Cut-Round-Diamond-1271745.asp (Have to check it Eye Clean Ask Vendor, 7.73mm X 7.78mm 1.73Ct like a 1.8 only 60.5% depth I SI1) $10,450 HCA 1 in Ideal TIC, you should request idealscope to check for leakage.

Option 1 has safest cut all images available, most likely to be eye clean branded cut with lifetime upgrade policy.

Option 2 H color and a little larger but you need to check leakagae with idealscope

Option 3 The largest would have to check idealscope images for leakage, symmetry and if its eye clean.

I hope I have gotten your budget range correct if not post your preferences.

On clarity most would agree eye clean is eye clean and if you work with a PS vendor they will be straight with you. It much harder but not impossible to find eye clean SI2 stones, most are able to find suitable SI1 without too much worry. You can take the guesswork out of it and not sacrifice a huge increase in price with VS2 which is sometimes necessary for availability reasons.

On Color it is really subjective but a large majority would say if you don't want to see warmth don't go below I and if you really want ICY white you have to stick with G and above. The setting shouldn't matter that much some say going with Yellow Gold hides warmth, while others say that platinum or white gold make their stones look whiter. I don't feel it makes a big difference with either color of setting and with I an above you aren't worried about hiding warmth.

Regards,
CCL

 

[LesserOfWeevils]

I hope I have gotten your budget range correct if not post your preferences.

Thanks for the suggestions but those are just a bit out of my price range. I''m looking more in the 8k range with 1.5 being probably the absolute largest diamond I could afford reasonably.

Here is an example of what I was toying with that is bigger but sacrificing some cut quality:
http://www.jamesallen.com/engagement-rings/settings-with-matching-bands/?module=diamond&item=1271997
or
http://www.bluenile.com/build-your-own-diamond-ring?&pid=LD01372086&builder=BYOR&forceStep=DIAMONDS_STEP

Here is an example of what I had gone after initially for cut quality:
http://www.whiteflash.com/hearts_arrows/Whiteflash-ACA-cut-diamond-2219626.htm (I know this is sold, just using as an example)

And thanks for the suggestion Whitby! I am however going to go with either a platinum or white gold setting. Would that change your opinion of your suggestion?

 

[whitby_2773]

Date: 1/28/2010 2:19:59 PM
Author: LesserOfWeevils


Thanks for the suggestions but those are just a bit out of my price range. I'm looking more in the 8k range with 1.5 being probably the absolute largest diamond I could afford reasonably.


Here is an example of what I was toying with that is bigger but sacrificing some cut quality:

http://www.jamesallen.com/engagement-rings/settings-with-matching-bands/?module=diamond&item=1271997

or

http://www.bluenile.com/build-your-own-diamond-ring?&pid=LD01372086&builder=BYOR&forceStep=DIAMONDS_STEP


Here is an example of what I had gone after initially for cut quality:

http://www.whiteflash.com/hearts_arrows/Whiteflash-ACA-cut-diamond-2219626.htm (I know this is sold, just using as an example)


And thanks for the suggestion Whitby! I am however going to go with either a platinum or white gold setting. Would that change your opinion of your suggestion?

hi LofW

firstly, i'd definitely go with platinum if you're going with a lower color grade - that white gold rhodium plating is really *white*! i find the softer color of platinum more forgiving; take that opinion from a woman with an I colored stone completely bezel set in rhodium plated white gold! i find the comparison between stone and metal (rhodium plated white gold) ok - but a little stark. if i was doing it again i'd do it in platinum. i also prefer the 'heft' of platinum; if this is a forever ring, give it suitable gravitas, y'know?

but LofW - these things are TASTE - you'll have to take a look yourself to work out what you like.

ok - bottom line - would i be happy setting that stone i linked for you in platinum?......

....(thinking)....

yes. i would. my eye for color is more sensitive than most, and i think the cut would cover any color you'd see from above anyway, so i'd just be sure to go for a flattering setting. it also leaves you some room in your budget to look for a good setting, and the setting is what turns the stone from 'a diamond' into 'a jewel'. if you look in the 'show me the ring' section at the moment, you'll see some lovely J's set as solitaires, and they look fine. an I will be whiter still, so take a look there and see what you think.

Good Old Gold also has a top notch trade up policy, so if over time you decide you want bigger/whiter/cleaner/whatever, you can use the full value of your stone (with some caveats - read their policies) towards a new stone.

one last note, LofW - a 1.3 with side stones, or a 1.5 with the same sidestones, will look VERY similar. when you start adding side stones or halos and any setting other than a solitaire, it masks considerably changes in center stone size. tapered baguettes would be lovely either side of the stone i linked for you, as would pears, or a halo setting, or sundry other things. take a look at this... you'll see what i mean. it has a center stone about 1.3, with beautiful tapered baguettes, and i'm pretty sure it's set in platinum. gorgeous, gorgeous GORGEOUS ring!

so - would i do a ring like that? oh yes! in a heartbeat!

hope this helps!

 

[MatchMadeInCarbon]

Hey LoW;

I have to respond since the thoughts & feelings in your initial post is nearly the same as mine when it comes to our predicament. As there are so many qualified/experience members here I rarely contribute to the advising unless opinions are wanted. So here are mine (and what I followed to get my finished product):

-I went with the marginally smaller, more ideal (in my GF''''s preferences) diamond. I don''t know what her preferences are exactly (it''s a surprise), but I figured them out. Like you, everything looked nearly the same. A tenth of a carat is most likely unnoticable.

-regarding color; try to assess your GF''s sensitivity to color. Maybe take her out to look at paint?

Other thoughts:
-I personally put equal, if not more, effort and thought into finding the right setting. I believe that can really make a ring special and tailored to the occasion. So perhaps the .1-.2 carats saved can help you reach the setting that really fits her. Being a research man myself, spend hours going through the "Show Me the Ring" thread or elsewhere since there are so many options. I went with custom and I''m not even sure how it''ll turn out (old school jeweler- no CAD/images).

Congrats & best of luck-
MMIC

 

[jet2ks]

Date: 1/28/2010 2:19:59 PM
Author: LesserOfWeevils

Here is an example of what I was toying with that is bigger but sacrificing some cut quality:
http://www.jamesallen.com/engagement-rings/settings-with-matching-bands/?module=diamond&item=1271997
or
http://www.bluenile.com/build-your-own-diamond-ring?&pid=LD01372086&builder=BYOR&forceStep=DIAMONDS_STEP

I would pass on the James Allen stone, it is showing leakage in the photo. The BN diamond has good numbers, if it is eye-clean. My only hesitation is that I prefer to see photos and IS images, which BN does not provide. If you have time, however, they have an excellent return policy if you are not satisfied.

As far as size goes, there is a significant price per carat jump at 1.5, so staying just under that size can really help a budget.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Ditto Jet.

Also, in my experience color is something that sometimes you have to live with to know how you really feel. I would MUCH prefer a G color 1.2 to a 1.5 I color because in daily wear and accross lighting environments (something you can''t really study in a jewelry store), the tint in diamonds becomes more apparent. And although I am a size gal, the difference in size between a 1.2 and a 1.5 is not large enough for me to take a risk on a lower color. That said, I is still very white/nontinted, but it will still not have the same apparance as a slightly higher color, like G.

As for clarity, of course you can''t tell the difference in person

That is the big thing about clarity, it is all in the head unless you start getting down to SI2 range. Playing it safe to me means getting an eye clean SI1 from a trusted vendor.

Look up the policies of the compny you are thinking of going with, some of the after-sale options for customers are worth their weight in gold, in my opinion. I also like the branded cuts, not because of the brand, but because I like knowing the diamond was cut expertly and companies offering such diamonds for sale typically have good policies.

 

[dmv]

LoW,
I was in your same situation except I was looking for an oval stone. I''m an internet research hound too and was amazed by the knowledge of the people here at pricescope compared to your usual 4C education elsewhere...I feel I could work at a local jewlery store now and know more than some of them do (I said some, not all).

Cut was my number 1 quality as well with clarity, color, and size to follow whatever fit into the budget but didn''t sacrafice too much on each. Finding a well cut oval is somewhat difficult because of the limited selection and no "official" cut grading. This is where I just put my trust into a pricescope vendor, Whiteflash, and let them be my eyes. I ended up with a 1ct, F, VS2 oval with a great cut and the IS and ASET images to back it up (something some local and internet vendors do not offer). I wasn''t shooting for color as high as F, but it came with the excellent cut stone that I was looking for so...

To me size was important, but not at the top of my list by any means. I know size is the first thing people think about when they think of diamonds and the first thing many people comment on is "How big is it?"...but to me finding the perfect stone for the money meant more than size. I guess like my girlfriend, it''s the internal things that aren''t noticeable that make her who she is.

Sorry to be long winded...

One more thing, I work in the lighting business in sales. Lighting a jewlery store is an art, there is way more than you could imagine goes into the lighting of a jewlery store. It is ALL meant to fool you and make that diamond pop regardless of it''s specs. During my search for a diamond I went to several local stores and I commented on the lighting in one store and the salewoman said "Oh we have terrible lighting, so this diamond would really shine every where else"...I took a look at their lighting and saw it was indeed excellent lighting and ran as fast as I could...

Just my thoughts and best of luck,
DMV

 

[LesserOfWeevils]

So I sat back and reread this thread along with some others. I took into account my original goals and tossed aside my 1.5 carat weight ideals to get back to the basics of "Cut is King".

I also gave up on the bluenile idea as I wanted to see what I was buying as it has been suggested so many times. I ended up calling GOG and discussing options.

There are some very nice 1.25 carat stones that are eyeclean si1s and around the H-I color that fit my budget pretty well. I decided I wanted a true H&A stone and this seems to be where the price point sits.

But as I was looking over everything I noticed the Solasfera diamonds. For just a little bit more I could get a 1 carat in that brand.

Which would you go with? The 1 carat branded guaranteed sparkle monster or the 1.25 H&A well cut.

 

[whitby_2773]

LofW - good to see you back

something i wanted to know - what size is your fiancee''s finger? that makes all the difference...

 

[LesserOfWeevils]

Date: 1/29/2010 5:17:13 PM
Author: whitby_2773
LofW - good to see you back


something i wanted to know - what size is your fiancee''s finger? that makes all the difference...

Whitby,

This is a trouble maker. I have no idea in the world. She has one ring only and it doesn''t fit her. I could covertly try to discover the size of this "too big" ring.

Thanks!

 

[whitby_2773]

ok - yes - a sticking point, but hopefully not insurmountable...

personally, i wouldnt go the solasfera route as a *first* diamond (believe me, there will be others later!) - despite these being unbelievably beautiful diamonds - as i think the size trade off might not be worth the extra light return. i think a high performing H&A will give your fiancee an outstanding diamond while still sitting in the size range you'd like. but this is MY preference; sooner or later, you're going to have to consult the lady in question, especially if she hasn't told you her position on size vs cut. we've also heard stories here of girls who said they *definitely* prefered great cut...who were then disappointed when their ring wasnt a cetain size. what they really meant was - they wanted a large stone...AND a great cut! so do try to get some idea on where your lady sits on this continuum.

and at some point, you're gonna have to pin down her ring size...!

 

[Bella_mezzo]

If you are going with a simple setting you can have it sized like the too big ring and then size it down later (if you want this to be a suprise)

 

[LesserOfWeevils]

All of the ring size talk and "what does she like" talk is a bit embarrassing. I''ll say why. We both came from families that provided for us wonderfully and that helped us through school, but neither of us come from any sort of money. My mother''s wedding ring was a .30 carat or something. She has only 1 ring because it is all her family could afford (it was passed down to her from a great grandmother, a cheap little emerald).

Now we''ve both graduated college and make above average salaries. We are by no means rich but we have come from near nothing and both of us have always been very frugal.

To propose I want it to be something very special. I saved up the money for this ring and if I approached her about it, I''m sure she would balk and say we should spend the money on our house note, or a college fund for our children, or put it into savings, or spend on the wedding, etc etc. However, I''m taking the initiative here because she deserves at least one thing in her life much finer than what she would ever pick for herself.

So as to her style... It would be modest but classy. She has 2 pieces of "real" jewelry, a necklace I bought her 6 months ago and the old passed down "too big" ring that she sometimes wears on her thumb to remember her granny.

As you can see... I''m not at liberty to discuss this with her. It was hard enough to squirrel away near 10k without her noticing, I do not intend to be undone.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Have you watched the videos on GOG;s site comparing a solsafara and an H&A?

I would go for the larger H&A myself. 1.25 carats is *wonderful* size, my diamond is that size and it looks wonderful and big but not too big. I work in an area where people don''t wear large e-rings, I suspect mine is by far the largest around here, but it by no means feels too big and people don''t comment on it, at least not out loud

EVen if her diamond felt a little large at first she would get used to it I am sure and would love and feel proud that you gave her something so gorgeous!

And if not, that''s what return policies are for! You can always go down in size and up in color if she is unhappy with her too big diamond. But I highly doubt that would happen

.

 

[whitby_2773]

LofW -

got it. i understand completely. and on that basis, i''m going to revise what i said - but only on one proviso; i am going to assume she is a slim-to-average build and that her hands/fingers are slim-to-average also.

if that''s the case, i''m going to go against everything i''ve ever said on buying engagement rings in general and in *your* case say...

i''d get the solasfera.

if her tastes are modest, a large diamond (and keep in mind, the average diamond engagement ring solitaire is still less than half a ct) may well make her feel very uncomfortable. my best girlfriend just got engaged, and she has size 6 fingers (average) and her ring is .95 - diameter 6.35. and it looks gorgeous on her and plenty big enough. in fact, most of her friends have said "wow! that''s a lovely big ring!"

given that it seems your girl is not materialistically competitive or into ''big and flashy'', i suspect (and i''m guessing here of course, but it''s a gut instinct) that she might feel more comfortable with something still of comparatively generous size, but of exceptional quality. if it was me - and i have to stress this is me, not you - i''d go with a 1ct solasfera, and i''d be looking for a G VS2/SI1. if you want her to have the sort of beauty and luxury she didnt have growing up, and the sort of perfection she probably wouldn''t allow herself, i''d go for the best cut out there, as white as i could afford, and as clear as i could make it. size, in this instance, would come *last*, assuming you could still afford something of reasonable and above average weight anyway.

make the perfection you''re giving her something between you and her, rather than something for her to flash at the world - let the sparkles, not the size - do the talking. if she has slim hands, one carat will be gorgeous, and this stone will be like a flaming ball on her hand.

and that''s it from me! good luck!

 

[Lorelei]

Date: 1/29/2010 6:20:12 PM
Author: LesserOfWeevils
All of the ring size talk and 'what does she like' talk is a bit embarrassing. I'll say why. We both came from families that provided for us wonderfully and that helped us through school, but neither of us come from any sort of money. My mother's wedding ring was a .30 carat or something. She has only 1 ring because it is all her family could afford (it was passed down to her from a great grandmother, a cheap little emerald).

Now we've both graduated college and make above average salaries. We are by no means rich but we have come from near nothing and both of us have always been very frugal.

To propose I want it to be something very special. I saved up the money for this ring and if I approached her about it, I'm sure she would balk and say we should spend the money on our house note, or a college fund for our children, or put it into savings, or spend on the wedding, etc etc. However, I'm taking the initiative here because she deserves at least one thing in her life much finer than what she would ever pick for herself.

So as to her style... It would be modest but classy. She has 2 pieces of 'real' jewelry, a necklace I bought her 6 months ago and the old passed down 'too big' ring that she sometimes wears on her thumb to remember her granny.

As you can see... I'm not at liberty to discuss this with her. It was hard enough to squirrel away near 10k without her noticing, I do not intend to be undone.

Hi lesserofweevils and welcome!

I have read through your posts and I do understand how hard it is to decide with all the options available! You do have a great budget and can get something beautiful with it. You are doing all the right things in thinking this through and evaluation all the possibilities carefully.

I would say at this stage, if you could compare the Solasfera to a top cut h&a, that would be very helpful. Both can be beautiful but these two do have different personalities. Personally I prefer the h&a type, the Solasfera are beautiful but are a bit ' busy' for me. But it comes down to personal taste and preference. If you are unsure, I would suggest a h&a stone for the engagement diamond as this would offer a great balance of beauty and performance, fire, brilliance and scintillation. Dreamer's suggestion of watching a video to compare the two is an excellent one. But if you have a jeweller in your area where you could do a direct comparison, that would be extremely valuable.

Colour and clarity; a sweet spot which offers a good balance of quality is G or H and VS clarity, you could even consider SI clarities if eyeclean. Unless of course you prefer colourless and VS1 or VVS thats fine, but it will take more of the budget, if you go for the above grades of GH VS and the stone is well cut, there would be no visual sacrifice involved.

Also please don't hesitate to ask when you have questions or concerns, thats what we are here for!

 

[LesserOfWeevils]

After listening to what you all had to say I did prod and poke about the subject and determined that she has a size 5 ring finger. I''m not sure if that changes anyone''s opinion of a difference between the 1carat Sola vs the 1.25 carat H&A diamond?

To get this information without letting the cat out of the bag involved a lot of sidestepping around unrelated topics and finally coercing one of her friends to lend her costume jewelry for a mardi gras ball we went to.

I also watched the video by GOG and found my own eye drawn to the higher light return of the Sola, though I was concerned that maybe it isn''t as "strong or bright" as some people noted. Can you still catch its flash across the room? It seems the H&A has a brighter flash of light.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 2/1/2010 12:44:57 PM
Author: LesserOfWeevils
After listening to what you all had to say I did prod and poke about the subject and determined that she has a size 5 ring finger. I''m not sure if that changes anyone''s opinion of a difference between the 1carat Sola vs the 1.25 carat H&A diamond?

To get this information without letting the cat out of the bag involved a lot of sidestepping around unrelated topics and finally coercing one of her friends to lend her costume jewelry for a mardi gras ball we went to.

I also watched the video by GOG and found my own eye drawn to the higher light return of the Sola, though I was concerned that maybe it isn''t as ''strong or bright'' as some people noted. Can you still catch its flash across the room? It seems the H&A has a brighter flash of light.

Unfortunately, you probably won''t see either diamond accross the room unless the lighting is just right

But in conversation with her hands moving and people just a few feet way it will definitely catch eyes!

 

[spoogenet]

Love the screen name, btw, and welcome to PS.

I''ve been going through much of the same issue in my search, I ended up doing the proposal with a stand-in ring since I wasn''t having much success finding the real thing in a timely manner.

I''d hate to throw another wrench in the gears and of course my experience may not be applicable for your situation, here are a couple things I learned in my quest.

1. Ring size. Be sure you get this bit of information from someone you trust. How much slop you get in the size depends on a few things, such as whether the band is narrow or wide will change how it fits. Some rings are easier to resize than others, and in my particular case I picked one that''s quite challenging to resize. I had to get her involved on the sizing from a jeweler I trusted, and after 20 minutes of trying on rings & using sizing tools we ended up settling on 1/2 size lower than what the people at Tiffany had measured.

2. Cut type. Had I operated in a void, I would''ve gotten a Princess cut based on outdated information. While I did not involve her in the specific search for a stone, I did take her to see some different stones. We started at Princess, then moved to Radiant and she loved those. Then it became apparent square is more important to her than anything else, she had only said Princess because it was the only square cut she knew. Her second most important feature is something "different," not necessarily rare but just not the same thing everybody else has. Unbeknownst to her, she''ll be getting a square cut H&A from GOG.

The search is quite thrilling, the good thing is it sounds like you''re already enjoying it!

b