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I am so bummed :(

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nararabbit

nararabbit

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Jul 17, 2010
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121
I know this is totally a first world problem.

But a few months ago I fell in love with a pear shaped diamond pendant in the window of a local consignment shop - a 3 carat beauty. My husband was down with it but we both wanted to think it over since it's a large purchase for where we are in life right now. I was so excited, until I got the specs. It's a J (I can live with that) I1. Yes, you read that right. It has small carbon spots, thankfully in areas that don't reflect over and over again. You can see them with a loupe, but not without. All the same, I1 is a horrible grade (no offense to anyone that has one, of course!)

Suddenly, the price is much less appealing to me and my husband. I have searched for the past few months to find one that I love as much. This one has beautiful fire and big, chunky flashes (it's an antique.) I even talked to my friend who is a diamond buyer and he confirmed my fears - they just want too much for what it is. Originally they asked $40k - to which I actually laughed without meaning to - then later came back with $25k, then $20k, then $17k. They've indicated the owner will go no lower, even though the grade is bad. My husband thought I was mad at him on the way home because I wasn't talking - of course, I'm not (I told him so!) I'm just so disappointed that my incredibly picky self finally found something beautiful, that I could wear with anything and would be an heirloom I could pass down to my niece someday.

I just want hugs. It took me over a year to find anything I wanted for sure, and I've tried on dozens of other things - earrings, necklaces, rings - and nothing makes me happy like this piece did. But I just can't pay $17k for a piece graded I1. It just doesn't make financial sense, and I'd feel like a fool forever. ;( I also can't afford a new, loose stone at the same size but better clarity. The price jump is just way too high. Virtual hugs are all I need (unless you have a 3 carat pear collecting dust you want to part with for around the same price - not likely! :lol: )
 
Who graded it? The consignment store or an independent appraiser? I just happen to be one of those with an I1 stone. I would assess each stone individually before I wrote off all I1's. Do the inclusions bother you or is it the dreaded "I1", which may not even be accurate. I can't make any evaluation regarding the price but I hope someone else chimes in about that. I just think it's ashamed to write off a stone that you love because of the suspected clarity unless the inclusions really bother you (and you said you didn't mind them because of their location).
 
Hi, thanks. :) I'm not writing it off due to the I1, but because of the price relative to the grade. The wholesale for a similar diamond would be nearly half of what they are asking. Of course, I don't expect to pay wholesale. But I really think the original seller is delusional to think it is worth that much. I'm sure they are thinking someone will see "3 carats" and that will be all they need. Given that it's been in the shop almost two years (or more!), I imagine the owner is not living this side of reality, but what do I know...
 
I am considering bringing in a couple of listings for diamonds with similar stats - for example, this one: http://www.ebay.com/itm/3-08CT-K-I1...7130116?pt=Loose_Diamonds&hash=item2c61aa9484. At essentially $11,000, it's much more in line with what I am willing to pay, especially as it looks clean in person. I guess it doesn't hurt to try.

I appreciate any links to better, similar diamonds - however I shy away from places that don't provide a photo of actual diamond, ESPECIALLY one of this size.
 
I would get in touch with either Perry Chen at Leon Mege or Engagement Rings Direct and see what they can screen for you and find. They both have great eyes for fancy stones and great contacts and have found some beautiful diamonds at great prices for others.

I do think that if you love it to death you should go in with 14K in cash and see if they will turn it down. Cash talks.
 
Nararabbit, I know just what you mean about not wanting to be taken - there are pieces out there that I adore that I just wouldn't enjoy if I had to overpay for them.

And then there are the pieces I'd have to make an exception for ....

See, here's the thing: I don't think I could ever pay market value for an easily accessible thing. I can wait indefinitely for a stock piece to pop up at a better price. But vintage pieces? Those are different. There, you're paying for rarity value, the "edit" of the store-owner, etc.

You didn't mention if the grading was done by a lab or an appraiser. If it's an appraiser but the inclusions genuinely aren't eye-visible, I'd question the grade (or worry about the stability, since it's one or the other to get it dinged like that). If it's GIA, and there's a plot, and there really aren't any problematic feathers, and it's just the salt-and-pepper, and it's in a setting you like, and, basically, it's a total package?

Well, I'd keep bargaining - 40K to 17K is a pretty big jump! But bring in apples-to-apples comparisons, both for bargaining, and for your own piece of mind, since it's not a question of just carat and color and clarity, but cut ... and chronology. And it's that last one that's toughest to put a figure to ....

ETA: Crosspost with Gypsy - love the cash suggestion!
 
The appraised grade is done by the owner, who is a G.G., but I am hesitant to assume he is correct - only because he kept emphasizing that "it's the same as a GIA certificate" which we all know is not true. Even after I pulled out my loupe, he continued with this line of reasoning. I secretly felt insulted.

The cash suggestion is one I have considered before and is still on the table. Unfortunately, my husband now dislikes this shop and doesn't want to buy from them, whereas I just want the stupid diamond. Of course I want to give my money to someone wonderful and feel good about it. But those people are not selling this diamond, this shop is. And I cannot fault them for wanting to make their money.

It is a little bit of a sore subject with him, and I wouldn't feel right making such a big purchase against his wishes even though I could, in theory. I am thinking I will wait a week or two until it's a little less tender and suggest the cash issue, as a last chance. I made the mistake of making my desire clear, so I've lost some bargaining power there. My best plan of action is probably to bring in a couple listings of similar cut/clarity/carat diamonds, cash, and the fact that this is their last chance or I will walk.

My FIL finds this whole thing hilarious. He tells me I am becoming a better Jew than his son. :lol:
 
I bought an old cut diamond this past year from a store I don't particularly care for... but they had the stone and I was tired of looking and it was pretty much exactly what I was looking for so... SOLD. I thought of it as liberating the diamond from them. So I get that. Your DH's objections are harder to deal with and I would feel the same way.

Is the setting something special? If it's not then again... Perry Chen or ERD are my suggestions.
 
Print out all the compareables and go back to negotiate. If they are willing to come down to your price, it is meant to me :) If not, walk - no harm.

It is hard to find a stone you love especially antique one ... so don't let it go so easily.
 
Surprisingly, after I made dinner tonight (I guess it was especially good..?) DH asked if I was still thinking about our 'adventure' today. I said I was, but I didn't want to upset him, so I was trying to let it go for now. He said it was okay to talk about it, he'd let me know if he got overwhelmed by it all. So I brought up the suggestion of offering cash, he actually was okay with that. He wanted to know if I'd be disappointed if they declined, I mean, yes, wouldn't anyone? But it's not like I'd fall into a super deep depression and stop bathing and eating and wearing a hair shirt, kwim? :lol:

So, we're going to go for it. The money we plan to use on it is due for another round of interest in just a few days, so I want to wait until then. If they say no, it's their loss to see their beautiful diamond be loved and owned instead of sitting in a shop window, day after day, the Miss Havisham of diamonds.

His willingness to go along with it, even though he doesn't 'get' diamonds or my love for them, just reinforces all the things I love about him. He loves to see me happy. He won't let me do something crazy that could jeopardize our financial future together, but if it's within reason, he's open to discussion. 8) So, I think for his 30th this year I'll spring for something for him, not sure what yet. He loves mokume gane. We'll see.

Either way, cross your fingers for me that by the end of January I'll be back, this time in SMTB! :naughty:
 
I hope it works out! Cash does make me super nervous though...

Its hard with certain things like an unusual stone. I'm still kicking myself for missing out on an Ebay auction for a sugarloaf ring since they don't come around often.
 
Glad you and your husband are on the same page! He sounds like he's being very understanding. Reminds me a little of my own tolerant spouse ... :rodent:

Winternight makes a good point - even with cash, there should still be a decent return policy in place so that if, say, you take it to an independent appraiser and s/he tells you, hey, good news, it's an SI2 ... but an O, you have the option of getting your money back if you like.

P.S. - I know where you're coming from, Winternight - it's the same place my own advice came from! For me, it's a big, beautiful diamond crescent brooch ....
 
Lots of dust that it works out! I would love an antique pear! Cash always seem to talk!
 
I agree...don't do it without return policy written on the receipt! Color is almost alwasys exaggerated when there is no cert!
 
Great (semi!) ending to that situation, Nararabit! I hope it does work out for you. sometimes --- things are just 'meant to be'. I love the Miss Havisham comparison!

The part I loved best is that DH was willing to try and 'get' your diamond thing. Communication is wonderful when both sides listen and try to hear the other person - your DH is listening and hearing you! WOO HOO!!! :appl:

Can't wait to hear what transpires...

Why did you decide that $14K was your cash offer point? I remember reading somewhere in one of the bazillion threads on these forums, a suggestion to start at 1/3 of the retail asking price. Is that $14K coming from his initial asking price of $40K or would you even start negotiations from his return offer of $25K - as in perhaps $12.5K? You can always counter offer to what you've determined is your comfort level for the item you desire. I am NOT a good negotiator (I even put a thread on the forum regarding negotiating!!) but there are people here who do and are good at it. Just throwing that out for what it may be worth to you --- discard that notion as you see fit! :D
 
Circe|1325944507|3097184 said:
Glad you and your husband are on the same page! He sounds like he's being very understanding. Reminds me a little of my own tolerant spouse ... :rodent:

Winternight makes a good point - even with cash, there should still be a decent return policy in place so that if, say, you take it to an independent appraiser and s/he tells you, hey, good news, it's an SI2 ... but an O, you have the option of getting your money back if you like.

P.S. - I know where you're coming from, Winternight - it's the same place my own advice came from! For me, it's a big, beautiful diamond crescent brooch ....
Click to expand...


Oh I love those too! Sigh, too many loves and not enough cash. Have this one saved as a favorite from forever ago. I think though ultimately I'd love to get a crescent brooch that could be worn as a necklace.

Sorry for the threadjack!

The more I think about it the less inclined I'd personally be to pay cash. What about a charge card with a review period to get an independant appraisal and then return to pay with cash? I just think having a credit card company back you up in case of problems would be a good thing. The shop owner would still be getting a cash payment for the stone.

moon.jpg
 
The charge card w/ a review period is a good idea. I think, though, there are two issues with this:

1. We don't have a credit card with that high of a limit because we don't often use CCs for things, and I rarely buy anything expensive anyway. So I'd end up splitting it between two cards which could get confusing. I suppose I could call and see about having our limit raised, but I don't really want to do that, especially for a one-time purchase. :cheeky:

2. I doubt they will go for the lower price without the cash motivation.

I think we will solve it by having the appraiser meet us at the shop and looking at it right there. I'm hoping that will motivate them to be more agreeable to the price, anyway. As to the return policy, I didn't ask it, but as it's consignment I imagine it's pretty limited, if at all. So I want to be totally sure before I walk out the door that it's not going to fall apart on me.

As for the price point, I would estimate the diamond is worth about $12.5, but they've already stated they have to make something on it, and they are offering the platinum setting and cable chain as a freebie. Now I have to get a day off the same time as my appraiser. :lol:

P.S. - If we do decide to go the review period route, how do we keep it insured? Would my CC cover that? Or no, because of the price point? It seems silly to get insurance when I may return it immediately... :errrr:
 
diamondseeker2006|1325946387|3097193 said:
I agree...don't do it without return policy written on the receipt! Color is almost alwasys exaggerated when there is no cert!
Click to expand...


agreed.
 
Well, the story may still have a happy ending, though not the one I expected.

The original owner has his or her head in the clouds and will not accept anything lower than $17,000 which, I'm sorry, is just crazy. However, if there's any of you interested in this beautiful, antique cut pear at that price, it's at DeLuca Jewelers in Palm Desert on El Paseo. I sort of hope a PSer will buy it, so I can enjoy it vicariously! LOL

I did find two smaller but better quality pears at James Allen and am in talks with them about them. I haven't pulled the trigger on either yet - I have to wait for the check to clear. It'll be the longest 10 day wait of my life! ;( If someone buys one, that solves the issue of which to take!

One is a 2.24 D SI2 and one is a 2.43 I SI1. I am afraid they will both seem too small after seeing the 3 carat on my hand. Probably more realistic for my every day life, but there is something about that magic '3' that appeals to me! I think, once upon a time, I saw a wedding magazine with a 3 carat pear, it sort of formed all my ideas of a 'perfect ring' all along. Thankfully JA has an upgrade policy, so at our 10 year anniversary or some other milestone, I'll upgrade again if the opportunity presents itself with the perfect stone. :oops:
 
i can't wait for it.
 
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