DH and I were on the receiving end of an undeniable wrong. We held this for over 6 months until it became clear that similar offenses were also happening to others and that the offender would have to be removed from a position of authority. Because DH was on the committee that made the decision for removal, his account of our experience carried a bit more weight by confirming the other reports of similar behavior. The person was removed and largley blamed DH. We never publicly disclosed the issues and only to the committee when it was revealed as a broader problem. This was more than a year ago.
Today DH recieved a message from the offender basically saying “I want you to know that I forgive you.”
I am glad for this person that they are no longer harboring anger or bitterness towards DH....but it Is also clear they feel DH wronged them instead of the other way around. DH is puzzled as to how to respond to this misplaced forgiveness. By saying ‘thanks for forgiving me‘ one is admitting they did something wrong. But that is not the case. Neither of us are the kind to hold a grudge so for us it was over. Until today...
Curious if you’ve been in a similar situation and how you responded.
Today DH recieved a message from the offender basically saying “I want you to know that I forgive you.”
I am glad for this person that they are no longer harboring anger or bitterness towards DH....but it Is also clear they feel DH wronged them instead of the other way around. DH is puzzled as to how to respond to this misplaced forgiveness. By saying ‘thanks for forgiving me‘ one is admitting they did something wrong. But that is not the case. Neither of us are the kind to hold a grudge so for us it was over. Until today...
Curious if you’ve been in a similar situation and how you responded.