Help for a newbie: first experience with diamonds

[iamspartacus]

Hey everyone, I''m a PhD student (will finish in a couple of months) and am planning to propose in a couple of weeks. I''ve been putting off buying a diamond, what with school and exams and job-hunting. Finally decided to get down to it, and have been researching (mostly on this site) for the past couple of days.

I''m a total newbie with jewelery, and I can''t really ask my girlfriend for opinion (I want it to be a surprise). Here''s what I think, your feedback on this will be very useful.

Also, my girlfriend has hardly any jewelry (no rings, no necklaces), so I don''t have an idea of the kind of stuff she likes in jewelry (except for the fact that she likes silver more than gold). Other than jewelry, she usually likes simple stuff with clean lines.

I think an oval diamond will be good, since she has somewhat short fingers (I''m told ovals look good on short fingers, which makes sense).
I also thought I''ll try to get an Ideal cut, G/H/I color, and VS1/VS2/SI1, as long as the stone is "eye clean". I''m guessing a 0.8-1.0 carat stone should be attainable with my budget. Does that make sense?
Since I''d really like to look at the diamond before I buy (to make sure its "eye clean"), the only good online store (that had pictures for a reasonably wide selection of ovals in my range) was JamesAllen. BlueNile and Mondera don''t have pictures, WhiteGold didn''t have pictures for more than a couple of ovals in my range. Are there any other reputable sites that have pictures of diamonds??

From JamesAllen,here are a couple of diamonds that I liked:

http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/G-VS2-Ideal-Cut-Oval-Diamond-1102771.asp


http://www.jamesallen.com/diamonds/H-SI1-Ideal-Cut-Oval-Diamond-1130252.asp

Both of them are a little bit on the expensive side, and have a little bit more depth than ideal (I''m told 55-62 is good for ovals), but I couldn''t find better pieces.


I read a couple of posts debating the pros of platinum and white gold. Since my gf likes silver, I''ve decided to go with platinum.
I also don''t know her size. I can try to approximate, since I think her ring-finger is about as big as my pinkie. Should I just buy a diamond to surprise her and then get a setting later? Or should I just buy a ring, and get it resized if it doesn''t fit?


If you have any comments, please reply and help and anxious newbie.
Thanks for reading!

 

[Cleo]

Hello and welcome to PS!

Congratulations on your forthcoming proposal - how exciting!!

Your post raises several points really.

It''s great that you know your girlfriend prefers white metals. Is there any reason why you chose platinum? If you are on a budget (aren''t we all!), white gold may be a more economical alternative to platinum for you, whilst still satisfying her preference for white metals.

Secondly, are you sure that your girlfirend will like an oval diamond? If you are, than that''s great!

An oval isn''t necessarily a shape chosen by many people for an engagement ring stone (although oval diamonds are very beautiful!) - it''s just that rather like, say, a princess-cut diamond, people tend to either like them, or not.

A round brilliant diamond might be a safer choice, as the ''classic'' engagement ring stone, and one which looks good on everyone, regardless of the shape/size of their hands.

I''m not trying to put you off your choices - just offering an alternative point of view and trying to make sure you will buy something your girlfriend will love! You know her better than any PSers!

You have chosen a great range of colour and clarity - which will give you a clean, white diamond for a good price... and you are also concentrating on buying the best possible cut, which is awesome!

I''m afraid I have no experience of choosing ovals myself, so will leave the others to comment on the stones which you have posted - but it sounds as if you are off to a great start with getting your engagement ring!

If you plan to choose a simple, solitaire setting I would probably just hazard a guess at the sizing, based on your little finger, and then get it sized if necessary. At least then you will have a ring to propose with, which your girlfriend will love, even if it does need to be sized!

x x x

 

[Lorelei]

Welcome!

Firstly I just wanted to check, are you positive she would love an oval? The reason I mention this is because often it can be safer to go with a round, unless your GF has expressed a real preference towards a fancy shape.

Ovals can't really be judged by the numbers, sometimes diamonds with numbers outside suggested ranges can be gorgeous, so don't rely on the numbers absolutely. That is why photos are essential, and a good vendor's opinion ( such as JA.) Also an ASET image can be useful if available.

If you are absolutely set on buying an oval, then I would contact JA, tell them your budget and what you are looking for, and ask them to recommend some stones for you. I feel the vendors often are the best people to advise you especially when buying this sort of shape, as someone who has the actual diamond and a professional knowlege of the shape is the best suited to help you. The staff at JA are very nice and experts!

 

[iamspartacus]

Thanks a lot for the replies guys.

I''m not really set on an oval stone, I just have a feeling it''ll look nice on her. She used to have a ring with an oval gemstone a few years ago (gifted by her mother), and I thought that looked nice on her fingers. But reading the comments, it seems like a round diamond is a safer choice: its more likely that she''ll like the stone.
I''ll go to one of those "mall stores" today to see what ovals and rounds look like in a setting.
Now I''m confused though

. Hopefully, looking at the diamonds in person will be helpful.

I decided on Platinum because it seems a little whiter than WG in pictures. Also, I''m not sure how often my girlfriend will actually get a WG ring ''rhodium plated'', which will make it even yellower. So, I feel platinum is the better choice, even though its more expensive.

Lorelei suggested that I call JA and ask them to pick a stone. I didn''t even know I could do that! I thought JA was just an online diamond co., and specially for someone with a $3k-$4k budget, they won''t care enough. I''ll definitely try talking to them once I''ve decided on the oval-versus-round issue.

Cleo, thanks for the advice on ring sizing. I also thought she would like to have an actual ring when I propose, even if it has to be resized later.

 

[cinnamon013]

Date: 3/30/2008 5:27:16 PM
Author: iamspartacus
Thanks a lot for the replies guys.

Lorelei suggested that I call JA and ask them to pick a stone. I didn''t even know I could do that! I thought JA was just an online diamond co., and specially for someone with a $3k-$4k budget, they won''t care enough. I''ll definitely try talking to them once I''ve decided on the oval-versus-round issue.

JA will be very willing to help you out! You can call any of the vendors on here (GOG, JA, WF, etc) and they''ll assist you in your shopping!

 

[canuk-gal]

Date: 3/30/2008 7:18:38 AM
Author: Lorelei
Welcome!

Firstly I just wanted to check, are you positive she would love an oval? The reason I mention this is because often it can be safer to go with a round, unless your GF has expressed a real preference towards a fancy shape.

Ovals can''t really be judged by the numbers, sometimes diamonds with numbers outside suggested ranges can be gorgeous, so don''t rely on the numbers absolutely. That is why photos are essential, and a good vendor''s opinion ( such as JA.) Also an ASET image can be useful if available.

If you are absolutely set on buying an oval, then I would contact JA, tell them your budget and what you are looking for, and ask them to recommend some stones for you. I feel the vendors often are the best people to advise you especially when buying this sort of shape, as someone who has the actual diamond and a professional knowlege of the shape is the best suited to help you. The staff at JA are very nice and experts!

HI:

Sound advice. GOG has also provided some nice ovals here on PS. Good luck and let us know what you come up with!

cheers--Sharon

 

[Lorelei]

Date: 3/30/2008 6:18:22 PM
Author: cinnamon013

Date: 3/30/2008 5:27:16 PM
Author: iamspartacus
Thanks a lot for the replies guys.

Lorelei suggested that I call JA and ask them to pick a stone. I didn''t even know I could do that! I thought JA was just an online diamond co., and specially for someone with a $3k-$4k budget, they won''t care enough. I''ll definitely try talking to them once I''ve decided on the oval-versus-round issue.

JA will be very willing to help you out! You can call any of the vendors on here (GOG, JA, WF, etc) and they''ll assist you in your shopping!

Thanks Sharon and Cin. With the vendors here, they want to share their expertise and skill with all their customers, whether they are spending $100 or $100k, so don''t worry about asking them for their help, that is what they do!

 

[Cleo]

You are very welcome

Great idea to visit some B&Ms to do some research on the types of setings and shapes of diamonds. Be careful not to get talked into buying whilst you are there!! You are obviously a clever man - but B&Ms can be very persuasive - and will do their best to put you off buying online or elsewhere!

However, your best chance of buying a stone with an awesome CUT is from JA, GOG or one of the other PS vendors.

I don''t wear white metals myself, but I understand that while white gold tends to go yellowish with age (mainly on the palm side, where most wear occurs), platinum can turn greyish - so both metals require some maintenance. Some jewellers will re-plate white gold free of charge - otherwise, I understand it''s not an expensive procedure to have done.

Calling JA or GOG and asking them to pick out stones is a fabulous idea. They will be delighted to help you find something beautiful which fits within your budget.

Do come back and let us know how you get on!

x x x

 

[iamspartacus]

Updates:

I got my girlfriend to casually look at a jewellery store (in the mall!) to find out the kind of things she likes.
Here''s the report:

-Her ring size is 5 (yippee!! Won''t have to guess now)
-She really didn''t like a standard ''prong'' setting ring. She felt that the diamond was suspended "2 meters above the finger". She did show a preference for WG/Platinum instead of yellow gold
-Didn''t like any of the rings with big diamonds in them.
-What she liked best was a wedding band, something like this: http://www.jamesallen.com/products/item_63-1992.asp
-She also seemed to have a preference for very thin rings.
-She liked the round diamonds the most. Didn''t like the ovals at all, so I''m glad I didn''t go down that route (thanks to the suggestions from you guys!)

So, I''m thinking of getting a small diamond (about .5 ct), in an understated setting. Here''s one setting I really liked:
http://www.jamesallen.com/products/item_57-2120_build.asp?cid=57&item=2120&module=setting
Do you guys think that ring would look good on a small hand??

Any other suggestions for a "lower" setting, with a thin band?

Thanks in advance!!

 

[bling addict]

Hi Spartacus,
Is your $3-4K budget for the stone only, or stone and setting?
Are you still thinking platinum as with the prices for platinum high these day, it may take a fair chunk of your budget?
Are you certain your GF would like around a half carat over 0.8-1.0, I only ask because a lot of people here often find that diamond shrinkage sets in sometimes very soon after a they get a ring, so you may want to consider trying to get into the 0.8-1ct range as most people would find that size perfectly comfortable to wear, unless your GF has specifically said she wants 0.5ct?
I liked the setting that you posted, there's so many settings out there to choose from!

ETA: This thread
link has lots of pics of people's under 1ct diamonds so you can see how different sized diamonds look.

 

[honey22]

Ditto! I orginally wanted a 0.5ct for the same reasons, low on the finger, not too blingy. I went with a 0.8ct RB and havn''t even had the pleasure of wearing it yet, and I am CONVINCED it has shrunk in the safe while waiting for my BF to pop the question! I think especially if you are not used to wearing rings, a diamond can look sparkly and big initally, but then you get used to it and start to wonder about the size. I actually wanted a 0.7ct, but decided to look at 0.8ct to ward off any DSS - diamond shrinkage syndrome that might occur later

You could always purchase from WF or GOG who have upgrade policies, so if that stone does happen to shrink, you can get her a larger one down the track.

 

[bling addict]

Here''s a couple of stones
Link 0.722, ACA, I, VS2 $2589 (with ps discount)
Link
0.73, ACA, I, VS1 $2769 (with ps discount)
Link 0.704 H & A, H, VS2, $2893 (bankwire price)
these would leave you enough to get a nice setting, this https://www.pricescope.com/sift.aspx is useful to search for diamonds that meet your criteria. I would advise clicking excellent - excellent for cut, and AGS and GIA certs.

 

[bling addict]

Aww Honey, you still don''t have your ring?! He sure is making you wait (but I''m sure it''s worth it!).

 

[bling addict]

Here''s a few slightly larger if your budget is $3-4K for the stone only
Link 0.86 H & A, H, VS1, $3937 (bankwire price)
Link 0.81, H & A, G, VS2 $3857 (bankwire price)
Link 0.9 ACA, I, Si1 (need to ask if eye clean) $3934 (with ps discount)

 

[honey22]

Date: 4/15/2008 4:24:06 AM
Author: bling addict
Aww Honey, you still don''t have your ring?! He sure is making you wait (but I''m sure it''s worth it!).

Yeah, I actually asked him if he had changed his mind and he looked horrified that I had even thought that. He was really suprised that I thought that and then I think he felt really bad and just told me to ''trust me, I have definately not changed my mind!''. I am sure he is just wanting to get it right. I have waited nearly 12 years so a few more months won''t hurt me! (Anymore than that and it might hurt him though

)

 

[Cleo]

Honey - congrats on your shiny new ''Ideal Rock'' status!

You are being so patient - well done!!

Actually we had our ring so long I just about gave up waiting and also thought my fiance had changed his mind about asking me! I think I had to wait 4 or 5 months... *argh*!

At least you can treasure the anticipation of knowing you will be proposed to soon, and hopefully you will enjoy the moment even more because of it!

x x x

 

[iamspartacus]

Thanks a lot for the link to the <1ct diamonds, bling_addict. And also, thanks for the work in looking up diamonds

I would like to buy a .8 ct ring (the starting bonus came last week, so I''m feeling rich,

), but looking at jewellery with my GF this weekend made me think otherwise.
-She seemed to like really tiny diamonds (the piece of jewellery she liked best was a $400 wedding band with .25 tcw).
-Also, the place we were both raised (India) doesn''t have a diamond ER tradition (plain gold "wedding bands" are the engagement rings in India).
-I noticed her earrings were ''diamond-ish'' (I''ve never noticed before, that''s what PS does to you), and asked: they were cubic zirconia, and she said she doesn''t understand why people pay so much for diamonds (I know, I should send her over to pricescope, you guys will knock some sense into her)
-I mentioned that my mother was thinking of buying her a necklace and a pair of earrings (diamond) worth about $4000, she wasn''t too warm to the idea.
-Her office is predominantly male (she''s an engineer), and felt that she won''t be comfortable wearing a large diamond.

So I thought I should buy a .5ct from WF. If she thinks that''s too big, I''ll return it. If later she suffers from diamond shrinkage later, I can upgrade.
I have a feeling that even if I spend $3k for the ring and the stone, she''ll be a little unhappy.

I also noticed that she liked White Gold rings somewhat better than Platinum, so I''ve decided to go with WG.


BTW, how do I get a PS discount from whiteflash??

 

[iamspartacus]

Cleo, the ring in your profile is beautiful!!
I almost wish my GF liked yellow gold.

 

[bling addict]

Here''s some around 0.5ct
link 0.502, ACA G, VS2, $1646
link 0.507, ACA, H, VS1 $1662
link 0.563, ACA, G VS2 $1843
link 0.60 H & A, H VS1 $2183
link 0.50 F VS1 H & A, $1950

or since your GF likes the look of small diamonds in a band, and ''wedding bands'' take place of engagement rings where you were raised, perhaps you could consider buying her a diamond band like this link or any other style eternity band really, if you think that is what your GF would prefer then that is certainly something to consider.

As far as the pricescope discount from whiteflash, I just assume you ask them for it/say you are a pricescope member - but I''m not sure, as I have not yet purchased anything from them. Good luck with your search!

 

[honey22]

Date: 4/15/2008 6:16:07 AM
Author: Cleo
Honey - congrats on your shiny new ''Ideal Rock'' status!

You are being so patient - well done!!

Actually we had our ring so long I just about gave up waiting and also thought my fiance had changed his mind about asking me! I think I had to wait 4 or 5 months... *argh*!

At least you can treasure the anticipation of knowing you will be proposed to soon, and hopefully you will enjoy the moment even more because of it!

x x x

I didn''t even notice! Thankyou!

I just luvvvvvvvvvvvv PS!!

 

[mandielee]

Date: 4/15/2008 6:24:30 AM
Author: iamspartacus

[edited for brevity]

BTW, how do I get a PS discount from whiteflash??

Ask them. They''ll know once you start asking very nit-picky questions

. So far, they''ve proven themselves endlessly patient.

 

[Cleo]

Hello again! Welcome back

It sounds as if you''ve done some great research - well done!

I think the idea of going for a 0.5ct is fantastic - especially with the option to return or upgrade it if necessary.

Thank you for your lovely compliment on my ring... it likes you too!

Have a look at the settings on the WF website - they have some stunning, classic, simple settings which will allow the diamond to be mounted closer to the finger. You might like to consider a cathedral style setting, which narrows the distance between the shoulders of the ring and the table of the diamond.. effectively making it seem lower.

Do keep us posted!

x x x