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Funny E-Bay posting - a must read!

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ello

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This is soooo funny! A must Read!

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=8335653541


You are bidding on a mistake.

We all make mistakes. We date the wrong people for too long. We chew gum with our mouths open. We say inappropriate things in front of grandma.

And we buy leather pants.

I can explain these pants and why they are in my possession. I bought them many, many years ago under the spell of a woman whom I believed to have taste. She suggested I try them on. I did. She said they looked good. I wanted to have a relationship of sorts with her. I’m stupid and prone to impulsive decisions. I bought the pants.

The relationship, probably for better, never materialized. The girl, whose name I can’t even recall, is a distant memory. I think she was short.

Ultimately the pants were placed in the closet where they have remained, unworn, for nearly a decade. I would like to emphasize that: Aside from trying these pants on, they have never, ever been worn. In public or private.

I have not worn these leather pants for the following reasons:

I am not a member of Queen.
I do not like motorcycles.
I am not Rod Stewart.
I am not French.
I do not cruise for transvestites in an expensive sports car.

These were not cheap leather pants. They are Donna Karan leather pants. They’re for men. Brave men, I would think. Perhaps tattooed, pierced men. In fact, I’ll go so far as to say you either have to be very tough, very gay, or very famous to wear these pants and get away with it.

Again, they’re men’s pants, but they’d probably look great on the right lady. Ladies can get away with leather pants much more often than men can. It’s a sad fact that men who own leather pants will have to come to terms with.

They are size 34x34. I am no longer size 34x34, so even were I to suddenly decide I was a famous gay biker I would not be able to wear these pants. These pants are destined for someone else. For reasons unknown - perhaps to keep my options open, in case I wanted to become a pirate - I have shuffled these unworn pants from house to house, closet to closet. Alas, it is now time to part ways so that I may use the extra room for any rhinestone-studded jeans I may purchase in the future.

These pants are in excellent condition. They were never taken on pirate expeditions. They weren’t worn onstage. They didn’t straddle a Harley, or a guy named Harley. They just hung there, sad and ignored, for a few presidencies.

Someone, somewhere, will look great in these pants. I’m hoping that someone is you, or that you can be suckered into buying them by a girl you’re trying to bed.

Please buy these leather pants.
 

sjz

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I LOVE IT! LOL!
 

bstraszheim

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That was so funny that I cried while reading it. Thanks for the great laugh!!

I wish you well,

Bridget
 

ello

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-me two - ha ha ha - I''m still chuckling! I can almost picture it....
Have a great weekend.
 

AndyRosse

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LOL!!!
 

ello

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Did anyone buy the pants yet? ha ha ha
 

Tacori E-ring

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That is funny!
 

Lorelei

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Thank you Ries for posting this!!!! The guy has genuine writing talent in my opinion - I wish he would write a book!!!! So fuuny I cracked up laughing - if that doesn''t sell his pants nothing will!!
41.gif
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AGBF

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It''s great! Is the seller available?

Deb
 

AGBF

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PS-On the eBay auction page there are numerous questions posed to the seller and his answers to them. I have never seen public dialogue of this sort on eBay before. Is it a new feature?

Deb
 

researcher

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This is hilarious!!!
 

Lorelei

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Yes this guy deserves fame and fortune IMO, Mr Lorelei got a huge laugh out of his ad too! BTW we say something is
"pants " in England if something sucks, but I think it means more underpants than trousers
9.gif
Who knows, leather pants might even become fashionable again after this
41.gif
 

ecf8503

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This is great! And the pants did sell - 22 bids, sold for $102.50.
31.gif


On E-bay in the Q/A section at the bottom the seller says he used to write commercials. If you click on the "more" link at the end of some of the longer responses there are 2 more pages of funny Q/A''s!
 

rms

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I love this ad...hysterical.

ok, I will admit that I actually have a pair of not just leather pants, but black suede pants. Might not be so bad for me since I''m a girl and they don''t make me look like a gay man. They were given to me as a gift. They look like dressy slacks (as opposed to hot mama rocker pants
9.gif
). The funny thing is that for all the times I have worn them (yes, I have worn them), no one even noticed or said anything. They don''t have the shine of leather...maybe that''s why. Or maybe no one wanted to tell me the truth
6.gif


Has anyone ever seen the SNL skit with Brittney Murphy and Jimmy Fallon in the leather store? Very funny.
 

Mara

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Too funny...I actually have always thought maybe I wanted a pair of leather pants but...yeah not so much.
5.gif


I loved reading that!
 

sjz

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Date: 10/15/2005 12:01:45 PM
Author: rms
I love this ad...hysterical.

ok, I will admit that I actually have a pair of not just leather pants, but black suede pants. Might not be so bad for me since I''m a girl and they don''t make me look like a gay man. They were given to me as a gift. They look like dressy slacks (as opposed to hot mama rocker pants
9.gif
). The funny thing is that for all the times I have worn them (yes, I have worn them), no one even noticed or said anything. They don''t have the shine of leather...maybe that''s why. Or maybe no one wanted to tell me the truth
6.gif


Has anyone ever seen the SNL skit with Brittney Murphy and Jimmy Fallon in the leather store? Very funny.
I have a pair of black suede pants, too. I kind of like them. They make my butt look good
2.gif
 

ello

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If you''ve got it, Flaunt it, baby!!!
 

belle

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that was hilarious ries!
how did you find it??
20.gif
 

ello

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I was looking for a leather pants.... ha ha ha...NO, I''m just pulling your leg... my co worker forwarded the link to me.
 

rms

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Date: 10/15/2005 11:40:58 PM
Author: suziQ

Date: 10/15/2005 12:01:45 PM
Author: rms
I love this ad...hysterical.

ok, I will admit that I actually have a pair of not just leather pants, but black suede pants. Might not be so bad for me since I''m a girl and they don''t make me look like a gay man. They were given to me as a gift. They look like dressy slacks (as opposed to hot mama rocker pants
9.gif
). The funny thing is that for all the times I have worn them (yes, I have worn them), no one even noticed or said anything. They don''t have the shine of leather...maybe that''s why. Or maybe no one wanted to tell me the truth
6.gif


Has anyone ever seen the SNL skit with Brittney Murphy and Jimmy Fallon in the leather store? Very funny.
I have a pair of black suede pants, too. I kind of like them. They make my butt look good
2.gif
hey suziQ, do people tell you that, or is that your own personal assessment? I''ll have to check mine out...hehe
2.gif
1.gif
 

sjz

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Jan 17, 2005
Messages
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Date: 10/16/2005 10:46:45 PM
Author: rms

Date: 10/15/2005 11:40:58 PM
Author: suziQ


Date: 10/15/2005 12:01:45 PM
Author: rms
I love this ad...hysterical.

ok, I will admit that I actually have a pair of not just leather pants, but black suede pants. Might not be so bad for me since I''m a girl and they don''t make me look like a gay man. They were given to me as a gift. They look like dressy slacks (as opposed to hot mama rocker pants
9.gif
). The funny thing is that for all the times I have worn them (yes, I have worn them), no one even noticed or said anything. They don''t have the shine of leather...maybe that''s why. Or maybe no one wanted to tell me the truth
6.gif


Has anyone ever seen the SNL skit with Brittney Murphy and Jimmy Fallon in the leather store? Very funny.
I have a pair of black suede pants, too. I kind of like them. They make my butt look good
2.gif
hey suziQ, do people tell you that, or is that your own personal assessment? I''ll have to check mine out...hehe
2.gif
1.gif
People tell me that!
31.gif
 
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