Friend made a HUGE e-ring ooops

[LGK]

So a friend of my DH's just proposed to his girlfriend; he told my husband while they were hanging out today without us girls. My DH asked about the ring and his buddy said he bought a 1 carat round brilliant from Shane Co for $10K. My DH has some very strong feelings about Shane Co, and other maul stores, so he asked if he at least got something without visible inclusions. His buddy says "Oh no! It has this neat black spiral inclusion you can see with your naked eye... it is so cool cuz it looks just like that Nine Inch Nails album cover." Oh god. The horror!

My husband then went on to tell his friend that he'd bought me, for the same price, a 3.5 carat antique diamond (including a setting with another carat and a half of diamonds) that had no inclusions. (He was exaggerating a teensy bit

- yeah, there aren't any inclusions but it's clarity grader is a small chip, so it's really a VS2). They're kinda frienemies really, lots of competitiveness!

No, there's nothing to be done. His buddy isn't the sort to get help from us- if we suggested returning it, it would never happen, it would just make him dig his heels in more and/or make his fiancee feel bad.

His response to my husband telling him about what we had bought for the same price was that he didn't have the hookup we obviously did, and he had nobody helping him.

I would have SO been happy to help but no chance of that. Good lord, he KNOWS that my husband and I work with antique jewelry every day and at bare minimum could have given him some advice.

Honestly I was just amazed at how much my husband absorbed about diamonds just not-listening to me natter about them. I mean, asking his buddy if it was eye-clean?! Shocking.

I had to share my horror at this story with some who will understand! And I'll have to say something nice about the ring- without flinching!- to his fiancee next time we see them too. Wish me luck with that.

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

That poor fiancee! I hope she really likes Nine Inch Nails...

That''s pretty amazing how much diamond info your husband has picked up! Gives hope to all of us unmarried ladies...(note to self: step up the diamond technical talk...

)

 

[Shoopy]

I really don''t know how to feel about this post at all.

On one hand, your hubby is obviously a wise, wise man that did a lot of research for the love of his life

On the other hand, if I were the friend I would have been very upset because after I made my purchase AND proposed, someone is telling me that my diamond sucks, I got ripped off, and I could have gotten a much bigger stone

 

[LGK]

I really don't know how to feel about this post at all.

On one hand, your hubby is obviously a wise, wise man that did a lot of research for the love of his life

On the other hand, if I were the friend I would have been very upset because after I made my purchase AND proposed, someone is telling me that my diamond sucks, I got ripped off, and I could have gotten a much bigger stone

Hm. Well, for one thing, despite that they are a bit competitive with each other they've known each other for 20 years, since they were little kids. So he could have done the social white lie thing, but it isn't his specialty anyway, and he knows the other guy well enough to be honest. He was mostly trying to convince his buddy that he could (STILL could, he just bought it and could return it) do a lot better for the price. I know my DH was horrified by the maul stores long before either of us knew what Pricescope was and I think he just could't bear to keep his mouth shut when his friend had spent so much at one. But he was mostly trying to talk his friend into thinking about his options (like RETURNING IT), not really trying to pointlessly make him feel bad. And it wasn't like said it in front of his friend's fiancee, which would have been pretty rude. It was just as the conversation went on that he realized that there was not a chance his friend was going to do anything other than justify why Shane Co was awesome, rather than taking his advice as it was meant.

 

[sonnyjane]

I know a lot of people on this board really hate Shane Co, but I still feel like I couldn''t be happier with my experience with them.

It seems like the friend really did no homework at all before looking at stones, because I have a 1.01ct H SI1 stone with no visible inclusions and it was less than half of what your husband''s friend paid for his...

They do have a 60 day no-questions-asked return policy if he changes his mind about the stone though...

 

[NeverEndingUpgrade]

I hate hearing stories like that. I wonder what the fiance really thinks of her ring. And the money spent! It boggles the mind!

 

[purrfectpear]

OMG, I have no words...














OK, I found a few. $10K would have been a ridiculous price for a 1 carat that was eyeclean, but to think it has carbon

 

[Elegant]

That sucks for the guy... I wonder if someone at Shane Co told them it was unique because it had that inclusion...Yeah, I think it sucks when you find out you've been ripped off. The guy seemed happy with his purchase though before talking to your FI, right?

 

[sonnyjane]

Do you think the $10K includes the setting (maybe a pricey platinum one or something)? I just did a search of Shane Co''s online inventory and the most expensive 1.00 ct RB they have is an F VVS2 at $10,595 and I''m pretty sure a VVS2 wouldn''t have a big black inclusion in the middle! They only have 2 stones in that price range, then the next most expensive are 1.0 cts in the VS range that are around 7K.

 

[marcy]

I am sorry to hear someone spent that kind of money for a diamond with an inclusion you can see naked eye. I am with sonnyjane though - I am very happy with the Shane Co. and have a gorgeous diamond from them. Also, I know their prices pretty well and would think the 10K included the ring. They are somehwat higher than the popular PS vendors but not outrageous like many mall stores.

 

[LGK]

I''m positive he did no homework whatsoever. I know him pretty well, for 12 years anyway, and I can say for sure he walked in and bought the first thing that matched his budget like he was ordering a hamburger. I''m sure you can find a nice diamond at Shane Co., if you have the first clue what you are doing, and do a eensy bit of work, and look at more than one diamond. I guarantee he bought the first one or two he saw. He still has no idea what color or clarity is even, that''s how much research he DIDN''T do.

And yeah, it could very well have included a setting as well in that price, and I don''t know how elaborate it is or isn''t. DH didn''t actually see it, since his fiancee is wearing it and she wasn''t there.

I just asked my husband if he thought he was a bit hard on his buddy, and he said maybe so, but he just got rather mad when he heard that his friend did no work at ALL on searching out something nice for his girl- which my DH feels pretty strongly about. I think he feels like if you love someone, nevermind what you spend, you should do some work finding the best you can for whatever budget, that fits her taste, and it pushed his buttons a bit that his friend spent no time at all. Also he was rather hurt that his friend didn''t talk to us and that he said, in fact, that he had nobody he could turn to for help- I mean, he knows that the both of us work every day surrounded by cases and cases of fine estate and antique jewelry, and they''re (sometimes anyway!) supposedly best friends. So he probably did needle his friend a bit but eh, I sure see why. Also, it was his GF''s money entirely that was spent on the ring, not halfsies or anything. Yikes.

 

[sonnyjane]

Date: 7/29/2008 12:35:25 AM
Author: LittleGreyKitten
Also, it was his GF''s money entirely that was spent on the ring, not halfsies or anything. Yikes.

Yikes is right! I absolutely told my fiance that I wanted to be 100% involved in the decision because I know that he wouldn''t know the first thing about what I liked OR what he should spend etc. without my input. I will say though that if anyone was to say something about it being a bad ring, especially since she paid for it, it would probably be her...so maybe it''s okay?

Do you think he might have been kidding about there being a big inclusion? As a joke in response to your husband asking if it was eye clean?

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

She paid for it??? And got that?! Yowzers...

I think I''m with your husband on this, GreyKitten, which is that the friend should have at least put *some* thought into choosing a ring, or, if he''s completely uninterested in diamonds and diamond qualities (which is understandable - not everyone is like us at PS!), he should at least have gotten some idea of what his fiancee would like, or have enlisted help (like from you and your husband). Independence is all well and good, but not when it causes you to make foolish decisions (with 10K of someone else''s money!).

But I''m picky.

 

[arjunajane]

Date: 7/29/2008 12:35:25 AM
Author: LittleGreyKitten

Also, it was his GF''s money entirely that was spent on the ring, not halfsies or anything. Yikes.

You are joking right - She paid for it, and he didn''t even think to spend the money responsibly - he bought a diamond that reminds him of N.I.N ?! Did he forget who would be wearing the thing??

 

[Tuckins1]

Oh lord... I mean, I like Nine Inch Nails and all, but COME ON!!! That poor woman!

 

[RxTechRN2b]

Its hard to believe that anyone would think a big old black speck in a diamond looks "cool" -- sound more like this guy was just saying that in response to being questioned about the "maul" store where he got it and how much it cost, etc. My dad does that to people when he feels they are being rude by asking questions that are no one''s business but his own.

 

[rcrosier]

Date: 7/29/2008 10:50:08 AM
Author: RxTechRN2b
Its hard to believe that anyone would think a big old black speck in a diamond looks ''cool'' -- sound more like this guy was just saying that in response to being questioned about the ''maul'' store where he got it and how much it cost, etc. My dad does that to people when he feels they are being rude by asking questions that are no one''s business but his own.

I agree... The story seems too ridiculous to believe. I think that your husband''s friend played him because he got asked a question he might have thought to be impolite. I don''t think it''s an impolite question between two great friends, but asking "frienemies" about specs on their jewelry is an open invitation for them to lie and play up, or down, their purchase.

 

[Irishgrrrl]

Wow. Just . . . wow.

If I''m the GF in question, and I''m putting up $10,000 of my OWN money for my OWN e-ring, I''M going to be the one who picks it out, thank you very much!!! I realize that a lot of couples stand by the tradition of the guy picking out the ring and surprising the girl, but if the girl is putting ANY money toward the ring (much less paying for it entirely herself!), then I think she definitely should have some say in what she gets?!?! Was she involved in this purchase at all, or did he do this all by himself?

 

[PawnShopHustler]

Date: 7/28/2008 10:31:34 PM
Author:LittleGreyKitten
So a friend of my DH''s just proposed to his girlfriend; he told my husband while they were hanging out today without us girls. My DH asked about the ring and his buddy said he bought a 1 carat round brilliant from Shane Co for $10K. My DH has some very strong feelings about Shane Co, and other maul stores, so he asked if he at least got something without visible inclusions. His buddy says ''Oh no! It has this neat black spiral inclusion you can see with your naked eye... it is so cool cuz it looks just like that Nine Inch Nails album cover.'' Oh god. The horror!

Lord.Have.Mercy.

 

[girlie-girl]

All I can think to say are these two things.

1. I hope the friend was going overboard and didn''t *really* buy a stone w/an inclusion that reminded him of a NIN album cover.
2. It makes me that much more thankful that I found the wonderful man I have because I know he''d never do such a thing to me.

Thanks for sharing even if we''re all shaking our heads in disbelief. lol

 

[2Artists]

I pulled up the iTunes store to look at all the NIN album art to figure out which he is referring to. Is it the "Closer to God" image with a black spiral? Thankfully they have some very decent graphic design/art.

Well hmmmm on a positive note I guess the spiral has interesting symbolism-spiral galaxy, early earthworks and so on. There is of course the famous Robert Smithson earthwork Spiral Jetty. Also Andy Goldsworthy works with spirals a great deal.

Very interesting.



Mrs.2Artists

 

[anitabee]

ok, considering the fact that "frienemies" was mentioned, it's my guess that this guy TOTALLY EXAGGERATED THE PRICE! he probably wanted to impress your husband with amount he spent. unfortunately, he's not quite aware of the accurate price a grossly included diamond costs (as pointed out by a previous poster who checked shane prices).

also, he probably didn't want to buy a black, spiral included one but could only afford that and then later turned the scenario around to being a "i bought this one on purpose. the inclusion is rad. how special is this diamond?"