First dress-shopping excursion... ugh!

[ephemery1]

So, the "ugh" is because we went to a great dress shop on the Philly Main Line today, and tried on the most gorgeous dresses that are way more than I wanted to spend. They are having a Judd Waddell trunk show this weekend, so I tried on 6-8 of his that were totally my style. Then I put on a Carolina Herrera (sp?) that was beautiful, but pricey..... then I put on the DREAM DRESS.

First of all, Jenny Lee... if you''re out there, I want to be your friend. Then I want to hire you on as my own personal clothes-maker.

Her dresses just worked on me... and felt totally "right". I fell absolutely in love with one, but it tops out at $3900... probably about $2k more than I''d really like to spend.

I''ve still got other places to look, and other designers I want to see... I just haven''t stopped thinking about that one dress all day long. Is there any possibility of finding this dress for cheaper somewhere? I already checked ebay, though I wouldn''t be totally comfortable buying a dress there anyway, whether or not they actually had "the one". I am just having the hardest time justifying that amount of money, even if my parents could be talked into it.

UGH... anyone else had a similar first-time dress-shopping experience? Anyone decide to spring for a dress that was more than you planned on spending, just because it felt totally "right"? And was it worth it in the end??

Also... what''s the deal with not being allowed to take pix in the store? Is that common?

 

[dani13]

Oh...goodness...your story is exactly why I have been avoiding dress shopping (well other than we havent even set a date yet-

). No, but seriously, I so know this is happenning to me...I will fall in love with an insanely expensive dress...that would just be so me...

Well, I will just tell you, you just started your shopping- go out and look at some more dresses- try them on, etc...Look for sample sales in your area- I know of many people who have paid like 40-50% off the reg price of a dress just because they got it at a sample sale...I am sure a lot of the other more experienced gals on here will have plently of advice for you...I just wanted to let you know, I SO FEEL YOUR PAIN...I am sure I will be writing about the same thing in a few months....Good luck!

 

[jcrow]

check preownedweddingdresses. and there are others too. i think there is a thread somewhere on here where people listed their favorite site to by dresses.

i went over my budget too. it happens. but sometimes that means you cut back elsewhere. i just fell in love with the fabric of my dress. it''s so yummy! it''s all about priorities.

i found most stores outside of my small town allowed for pics. some places i snuck a shot or two in while in the dressing room though.

 

[KimberlyH]

Any chance you could find a seamstress to make you a similar dress? I was afraid of this happening to me so I tried on dresses in my price range only...or I would have been too tempted.

 

[ephemery1]

Thanks for your responses, guys! Dani, I really do have a tendency for automatically gravitating towards the most expensive option, no matter what it is we''re looking at!! And that''s usually before looking at any prices.

Sample sales would probably be a good thing... though I''m not sure how to find them? Just keep checking the bridal shops websites I guess? Also... they seemed to have to gather in a lot of fabric at the back of the dress with clips... if you buy a sample, do they alter it enough to account for that? Or do you have to just find one that happens to be your size...

Jcrow, thanks for the link... I did check out that site but no dream dress... haha. My FI also wasn''t very keen on the idea of my buying a pre-owned dress, for whatever reason... he was sort of encouraging me to just spend the money on what I loved. I''m just such a bargain-hunter normally, that it goes against my grain a bit. He pointed out how much $$ I''ve saved over the years by NEVER buying full-price anything, and said it should equal out to the cost of the dress.

And I know what you mean about the fabric... I couldn''t get over how different it felt from regular old silk/satin... unbelievable.

Kimberly, not sure about hiring a seamstress... the shirring on the dress is fairly intricate, and the whole reason I loved the dress was because the fit of the Jenny Lee was just so perfect. Good thought though... I''ll have to keep thinking about whether or not I could really justify $4K for a dress, and just cut back on something else.....

And in the meantime, more shopping!

 

[dani13]

Ephemery-

I feel your pain....Re: sample sales- I have to ask my friend- she got a really good deal on a Melissa Sweet gown- I will get back to you- but also, do you ever go on theknot.com? If you go to your local boards on there (chat) sometimes the girls know about and/or will post when a sample sale is coming up- so check those regularly....

 

[ellaila]

Good luck with the dress hunt! I''m not one to really give advice on this, as I basically only went to three stores and it was just to find Watters dresses that I''d seen and liked online. I needed my dress fast, so I couldn''t get all wrapped up in the dress search -- which is probably better for me!

But re: the not taking photos thing. All three stores I went to said "no photos until you put a down payment on the dress!" One told me that it''s not the store''s policy but the dress makers. She said that if Watters found out a store is letting people take photos of the dresses, they will not let that store sell them anymore (and something about how they''d also have to buy all the sample dresses? I didn''t really understand that part!).

 

[ocbride2007]

Yeah I think it''s standard for the no-pics allowed rule. Although I''m not sure it''s the dress manufacturer''s rule... I vaguely remember an investigative report on the local news about scams at bridal boutiques. Seems that a lot of them tear out the tags with the style numbers, sometimes the designer even (Which is ILLEGAL) so that the bride can''t find out what dress it is and shop around for a lower price... same motivation for picture taking.

HOWEVER, the boutique I went to had all of the tags, but didn''t let me take pictures. Well, they did... even though I didn''t order the gown, BUT only because I made it really clear that I was only waiting to order until the sample sale, which was when my mom will be in town, and I really wanted the dress. I asked if pictures were allowed only after she knew this, and she said no, but that she would go put the veil away and wouldn''t be able to see us, hahaha. So not all of them are scams...

It also seems to be a bit of a global phenomenon... remember Muriel''s Wedding, when she lied and said her mom was dying in the hospital and she wanted to show her a picture of the dress?? Hahahaha, you can try that!!

My suggestion if you want pictures... send the salesgirl out for a veil, etc, turn off your flash, and have someone there ready to snap a pictcure... probably won''t get the BEST shot, but you''ll have something to show for it!!

 

[ocbride2007]

Have you looked for the style on the Jenny Lee site yet?? I would love to know the style number, so we could give more input on the dress!!!

Here''s the link:
http://www.jennyleebridal.com/root.html

Plus, if you have the style number, you can call around to other shops that may carry it... prices on gowns vary widely from store to store, I doubt you''ll save thousands, but a couple of hundred isn''t bad!!

 

[snow_happy]

I fell in mad love with a dress that was 4150. Moreover, my FI and my BMs fell in love with the dress too. I couldn't stop thinking about it. still, I tried on other dresses and didn't find one that even came close. The third time I went to the store I found another dress that seemed interesting and when I tried it on I really liked it. It was hard because I had thought about the first dress for so long...the second dress was half the price of the first and really nice. I had to somehow impartially look at the dresses and decided that with everything into account that the second dress was the one for me. I'm glad that I hadn't bought the first dress but it sure was hard to admit that there was another dress out there that I wanted more. So my suggestion is to keep trying on dresses...you never know! My dress is not a wedding dress but "wedding dresses" can often be found online for much much less so shop around@!

good luck and ask on the dress message board on theknot.com -- those ladies have great advice for deals

 

[ephemery1]

Thanks for the feedback about different stores' policies about picture-taking... I really liked the store we visited, and they weren't shady about discussing the designers at all. Plus each dress had a price tag on it, which I respected... even though the prices were a bit staggering!

Octbride, good advice about calling around for prices at other stores... the store we visited is the only place in PA/NJ/DE that carries Jenny Lee, but there are 2 places in NYC that might be worth checking out. The style number is 524 on www.jennyleebridal.com (3rd from the left on Spring 2006 page)... I really don't know that I would have picked it up if the saleswoman hadn't suggested it, but wearing it just sort of took my breath away... it was really cut perfectly for my body. However I'd love to have an experience like yours, Snow, where I find an equally satisfying dress for half the price! So I'm going to keep looking... possibly even tomorrow with a friend!

 

[ocbride2007]

Is this it??? It''s gorgeous!!! Very simple and elegant!! I like the shape of the skirt.

 

[ephemery1]

Ooooh Oct, that''s it! I couldn''t figure out how to save the pic to post it... but yes, I loved how simple it was, yet so striking. In most of the weddings we''ve attended, the bride has been wearing something a bit more princess-y... floofier skirt, etc. Which is a style I definitely like and tried on plenty of... but this one just struck me as somehow different... maybe a little more unique despite its simplicity? The back was just a single row of buttons, and I looked a little more "hourglass" in it than the model does... slightly bigger chest and wider hips I guess... or maybe just the way the salesperson had the fabric pinned in the back. I just kept picturing my FI''s reaction to me in that dress... I think he would definitely have approved...

 

[ocbride2007]

To save the pic, you have to do the "print screen" trick and copy it into your photo editor, then crop out the rest of the window.

I know what you mean about seeing all the princess dresses - they are lovely, but I really prefer the slimmer skirt on myself, it makes me feel more elegant and refined, while a ball gown makes me feel like I''m playing dress-up.

I really hope you can find a way to get this dress, or find something similar you love just as much!! It seems perfect for you!

 

[Kaleigh]

Since I live here, I was curious if the store you went to was Suky Rosan???

 

[ephemery1]

Oct, there definitely was a completely different feel to this dress... I was trying to describe it to my FI. In the more princess-y ones, I did feel a bit like I was playing dress-up, which was a lot of fun... especially for a wedding day. And some of them I could totally see myself wearing. But in the Jenny Lee, I felt more quietly elegant, like you said. It also gave me the feeling that *I* was being enhanced by the dress, and not the other way around... if that makes any sense.

Hi Kaleigh! I actually tried on the dress at The Wedding Shoppe in Wayne. I''ve heard mixed reviews about Suky Rosan, but mostly all good about the Wedding Shoppe, so I thought it would be a good place to start... and it was! But I may end up at Suky at some point... and I''d like to check out the Bridal Garden in NJ also.

 

[E B]

Ephemery,

Have you thought about having the dress made? A wonderful dressmaker could make an exact replica for less. Silk satin (or is it organza?) is expensive, but I'm sure you could have it made for your original budget. It doesn't look difficult to replicate.

ETA: Oops! Someone already suggested this. Sorry about that!