Extremely attractive guy at my school

[princesss]

There's a guy at my school who is insanely attractive, and I can't stop thinking about him.
He has all the male attributes anyone could think of - very tall, very muscular, really confident, beautiful eyes, sexy lips, natural leader type, always the center of attention - you name it.Everytime I see him my belly starts to tingle, and I have to make a strong effort to not stare at him too much.
I can quite safely say that he is the most attractive guy I have ever seen, no exceptions.
The problem is, of course, that lots of other girls think the same thing, and I constantly see someone flirting with him.
So how should I do to catch his interest and make him think that I am special?
I have checked him out countless times and he has caught me doing it very often, and whenever he does I just look down on the floor and blush with a smile - so I'm sure he knows that I am interested in him.
I am a bit worried that he will dump me very quickly since he will definitely be approached by other attractive girls if I "get my hands on him", and it scares me.
I'm also a bit worried that he might be too tall for me, since he is something like 6'9 and I'm only 4'11 (and his arms are bigger than my thighs, seriously). -_-
So it would feel kind of intimidating with such an overpowering giant by my side, although he would of course be a fantastic protector.But as far as I can tell he is very sweet and kind to everyone, and nobody has said anything bad about him.

Help, please? <3

So, on the off chance you're really some 16 year old girl who needs advice - here's my 2 cents.

First off - you've got it bad. But honestly, and I'm not claiming that the plural of anecdote is data here, every guy like that that I've met hasn't been willing to put effort into a relationship. If he is 16/17/18 and can get what he wants, when he wants it, he's not going to value it. If he's got girls throwing themselves at him, you will be just another girl, and you will probably get thrown over at some point for somebody else. I know it sounds harsh, but it's true. Human beings are, for the most part, self interested and that's magnified when you're a teenager.

Yes, he knows you're interested. He also hasn't acted on that. He's either in a relationship, or you're not his type. We say it on here a million times because it's true - a guy that wants you will let you know. Now, you can give it a shot and invite him for coffee. Say, "Hey, I'm heading over to Starbucks, want to hang out for a bit?" If he wants to, he'll either go or he'll reschedule. If he doesn't, then you've given it a shot and you can move on. It'll feel like rejection because it will be rejection, but that's okay. The fastest way to get over a crush is to take the risk and get shot down. He'll lose his golden glow, I promise.

As far as this protector nonsense - go take some martial arts classes. Try Krav Maga. Try something that will teach you that you do not need to be protected, you can protect yourself. But you deserve to be cherished, and that's a completely different story and not something you can tell by looking at somebody.

 

[LaraOnline]

The way this thread has gone actually just cracks me up.

How many of you had a crush when you were a teenager. How many did light dating (going to the movies, etc without having sex). Of course I am sure that some of you were in fact sexually active at such an age; and you survived well.


Just because she is interested in him; and just because he might be interested in her does not mean that the first thing in their head is to have sex. Of course they might end up having sex for various reasons (some good, some less so, some outright bad). But, to say she (or anyone) should never even express interest.... You do not sound real at all.

If Butterfly is actually a real person - and if she were to approach me personally with such a question I'd have a discussion with her on her motivations, goals in life, what kind of person "he" seems to be, etc. As far as the sexual issue: I would want her to demonstrate to me that she understands her monthly cycle and how that relates to pregnancy, a knowledge of various methods of birth control (and the pro's and cons of each method), various STDs and prevention/treatment methods; and the various reasons people have sex with possible outcomes. I would also share my personal beliefs and the basis for those beliefs; but after that, she is free to decide when and with whom as it is her life and I expect her to take responsibility for it (and children only learn to be responsible if given the chance to take responsibility - and a key way of learning is to make mistakes). For those who wonder - I have actually done the above with a friends daughter who trusted me. We also did a similar "show me you know about": smoking and drugs; after which I told her she now had the responsibility for her life in those areas. We had some discussions later about how some things worked out (or did not work out); but that is part of growing up.

Perry

We're all worried that poor ol' Butterfly is poking fun at us lol!
But I feel kinda responsible because I DO have a story a little like this - I had a bizarre crush on my husband, when I was new at uni. He was three years older than me. And yes, I fantasised about him constantly! But carefully avoided any avenue where we might actually meet.
But I honestly felt like I knew all along....ten years later, we met up on the other side of the country ...engaged in three months...his mother was rather put out (he was getting long in the tooth and she was starting to relax and would have very long visits and even moved some of her stuff into his place heheh).

Butterfly, if you're still 'talking' to us - yes definitely get to know him. You want to be at least in the position of 'friend', so he will call you up a decade later (in my case, I was actually in the same friendship group as his younger brother, who I knew and liked very much, we went to high school together. This helped greatly when The Crush happened to be moving to my new area, across the country and didn't know anyone, many years later.... he knew me, he'd come to my 21st, but hadn't spoken since... he'd heard on the grapevine that I'd moved to where he was heading, a little while earlier, and he called!!). I guess it helped that we both come from a small town, so it was a simple matter of looking my mum up in the phonebook, and calling her for my info...

Perry, I honestly think you are underestimating the terrible things that can befall a girl that does get sexually active too young .
No, seriously, I do think that. I know we all do it anyway but... there's an awful lot of girls out there that are NOT meeting their potential as achievers because they threw themselves under a bus with a bozo. Sheesh that's sad, but it's true. Tbh, I only VERY NARROWLY survived, and not really with my sanity intact. Actually I'm not joking. Girls have to learn to believe in themselves. It's hard when a boyfriend is setting the agenda young.

 

[pinkjewel]

OK- before anyone wastes any more time on little "butterfly"- you might check her (or his) stats. She joined on Jan 27th and made her last post (total of 2) less than an hour later- and has not even visited Pricescope since!

So I still think "TROLL" , and let this thread die a nice peaceful death.

 

[Dreamer_D]

I had a crush like that when I was 16.

My advice -- go out to parties with your friends, go se movies, join some school clubs. Enjoy this boy from afar but enjoy being young and single too. Flirt with some boys you feel confident will like you back! Practice different ways of interacting with different types of boys (non sexually of course ETA: not because I am a prude but because if you are as shy as you say, and if your post reflects your true thoughts and feelings, you are not ready for sex).

If this boy wanted a "girlfriend" and is as popular as you say, then he will initiate a relationship he wants. If he doesn't talk to you and try to be around you, he is just not interested. So develop other relationships and fill your social needs in other ways.

And yes, if you are a troll, I hope you still get some good tips