Earrings & necklaces...girls...can you tell me how & why you like these...

[Regular Guy]

I asked this of another poster not long ago (Katiedid?), and got a somewhat puzzled response.

Maybe it''s a female thing...but more...it''s possibly somewhat a cultural context?

Consistent with the focus on performance, aka, sparkle...

I dunno...why do you care if they do?

Unlike a ring, you''re just not seeing them...most of the time...

Unless you''re taking it off, putting it on...or passing a mirror.

Maybe you''re catching someone else looking at them, and then you get a sort of second hand hit that way.

Alternately...aren''t maybe the feeling of either a necklace, or a pendant...of a certain size, or of a type of metal, that provides a sensation that might be something to want to feel.

On your ears...I can''t imagine. I''d think some will be uncomfortable...but otherwise, they would, I''m guessing, be optimized, if they were light, and not noticed. I suppose I''ve never worn either (well...as a teenager, I possibly wore a peace medallion).

Maybe this is in the wrong section? Sorry, I''m rarely in the jewelry section. I invite the moderator to move this if appropriate.

Still...if the attributes of a pendant being sought after are, say, mistakenly "sparkle," when they could and maybe should be one of texture, like material weight or size...well...it''s good to know.

Thanks for any insight.

it really gets to why anyone would choose to wear jewelry, maybe, and what underlies that.

 

[Skippy123]

I don't know if this will help, but some woman feel good when we put on a new shade of lipstick (myself incl), buy a beautiful new pendant or earrings. I know we can't see them only in the mirror but others can and others enjoy the look but somehow I feel good. Also, we don't really see our outfits but wearing something nice makes you feel good! Does that help?

 

[monarch64]

Ira, are you asking "what''s the point of wearing a pendant or earrings if you can''t even see them on yourself most of the time?" I think you are, but correct me if I''m wrong. Anyway, I will attempt to answer your question as I have rephrased it...

I think wearing earrings and/or a pendant is a lot like wearing beautiful lingerie. I don''t see it once I''m dressed, but I know it''s there, and I know it''s pretty. It makes me feel good even if others can''t see it....in the same way, even if others don''t know my pendant has an ACA diamond or my earrings are ideal cut, I would know, and it would give me satisfaction. Maybe undies are a bad analogy here. Let me try again.

I''ve worn earrings since I was in 2nd grade! I begged my mom to let me get my ears pierced because most of the other little girls in my class had theirs pierced and they all wore what I thought were the prettiest little birthstone studs, or tiny hoops, etc. I think a little sparkle on a woman''s ears adds even more beauty to her face, it''s like putting a lovely work of art in a beautiful frame. Same with pendants, they give some extra sparkle to the canvas above. Jewelry is something that is totally unnecessary but can add an extra level of "oomph" to an outfit and express individuality.

Why are neckties necessary for some men, aside from the usual dress code? Is it necessary to have more than 5 ties, do they have to be of the highest quality silk or a designer label? No, but I''m guessing it makes a guy feel like a million bucks to walk into his office knowing that he''s wearing the best he can afford... cuff links? Maybe necessary if you''re wearing french cuffs, but french cuffs aren''t necessary, soooo...

I just love jewelry, whether it''s real or fake, substantial or delicate, it''s an extra that I love simply because it makes me feel good. Kind of like great shoes or a handbag, only waaaaay better. LOL!

 

[Haven]

Ira--I''m not sure I understand your question, exactly, but here''s a shot at answering:

Generally, women like earrings and necklaces because they are accessories, and whether it is true or not, we tend to believe that these accessories make us look better. I personally choose to wear jewelry because I think it looks damn good! Certain accessories can make an outfit look even better, or highlight a particular attribute (such as a short necklace drawing the eye to a woman''s collarbone), but Skippy said it best when she said it just makes you feel good to wear it. As for the underlying reasons as to why jewelry makes the wearer feel good, it must have something to do with creating a more aesthetically pleasing image of yourself, and who doesn''t feel good when they look good?

If you''re asking why we care if they sparkle, well, we care if they look nice, and if "sparkly" is our definition of "look nice" then we want them to sparkle. It doesn''t matter if we see these accessories all the time, just like we wouldn''t want to wear a pair of jeans that has a big stain on the rear end (even though WE won''t see it) we also wouldn''t want to wear an accessory that doesn''t look nice.

As for liking the feel of a particular metal, that is simply personal preference. I wear a lot of the Tiffany bean jewelry, they''re sterling silver pieces with bean-shapes on them. I love these pieces because I like the way they feel, but also because I like the way they look. I still think that appearances are more important than any kind of kinesthetic response where accessories are concerned.

If a woman is used to wearing larger, relatively heavy earrings they certainly won''t bother her. I remember trying on my first pair of substantial chandelier earrings and I thought they were very heavy, but I got used to this type of thing over time.

I hope this helps! Are you thinking about buying a piece of jewelry for your lady?

 

[eac]

Ah, a question that has vexed humanity since the days when we lived in caves, and HuntsStag says to RockHead, "Why do HasCurves and BigHair paint themselves with white clay and ochre?"

Here are some reasons...

I am with Monarch64 on the jewelry-is-like-lingere comparison.

When you wear something sparkly next to your face, like a necklace or earrings ... it draws attention to all of you! Lots of older women say that diamond earrings "light up" your face by mirroring the sparkle in your eyes.

If somebody bought it for you, you are showing that you appreciate their gift and sense of style.

If you bought it for yourself, then you take satisfaction in what you have earned and chosen, and in creating your own image.

If it is from your family, you may wear it for the reasons above, and for sentiment, too.

If you admire the art and craft of jewelry, you show your aesthetic appreciation by wearing it and displaying its beauty.

Expensive jewelry shows social status. I admit it, I wear my diamonds to job interviews and professional presentations, to show that I am worth them. I feel confident wearing them.

For all these reasons...jewelry is part of how we tell other people the story of who we are, without words. A gift of jewelry that you really like can be important because it shows that somebody else understands you and your story.

Jewelry''s not just for women, either. Because it''s more unusual on men, it''s even more distinctive, and says more about their identity. (Guys will wear their fathers'' cufflinks and tiepins...the earring that frustrates their mom and dad...or the carved pendant that says to those in the know, "Dude, I went to New Zealand!" To say nothing of rappers'' bling.)

But you do seem to be asking more about women, so, lastly...all those earring-and-necklace wearing women have captured your attention, have they not? You''re thinking about them! They might well say, "Mission accomplished."

 

[Regular Guy]

Thanks everybody...Skippy, Monarch, Haven, eac...

All comments were helpful. The necktie one from Monarch maybe even the most helpful. I shop for neckties, have absolute preferences, and do care what they look like. Similar circumstance, I''m sure. Also, relatedly, maybe, there''s the function it has for closing the collar, which adds a certain formalness to the feeling not otherwise there if there''s no necktie.

A piece for my wife...nothing right now on the horizon, but it regularly emerges. Now I will not be dissuaded, if I might have otherwise been.

Warm regards,

 

[phoenixgirl]

As I explained to my husband, who certainly has his share of hobbies, diamonds are a hobby and interest of mine.

It makes me happy to look at pictures of everyone's pieces here. It makes me happy to search for diamonds for people who need help. It makes me happy to save up a little money and pick the perfect diamond for my next piece. This is just as important to me as how happy I feel wearing my jewelry.

We choose the image that we want to present to the world. I think that on a woman in her late 20's, a simple diamond stud and pendant set (0.72ctw and 0.52ct, respectively) is classy and cute. When I'm at work (high school teacher), I feel that my diamonds dress up my outfit without being a lavish display of wealth (unless it is the rare occasion when a crazy parent asks for a conference, and then I feel that my diamonds say, "I am not as young and vulnerable as you thought."). When I'm with my husband's coworkers or potential clients (financial industry), I feel that my diamonds represent that my husband is good at his job (my job certainly isn't buying us diamonds!). Surely most of this in my head, but it can't hurt to draw confidence from your appearance.

I don't get the argument that we should care less about jewelry that is worn where we can't see it. I think a lot of people choose to go down in color and clarity if they weren't already at their absolute bottom with their engagement ring because they realize that this piece is more accessory and less physical representation of your marriage. But to suggest that PSers should buy a diamond that doesn't sparkle just because we can't see the sparkle as often as our engagement rings! Heresy!

It's almost more fun to catch your ear in the rearview mirror and think, "There you are my cute little stud," than to become so utterly familiar with and conscious of your diamonds as you do with you rings. We choose glasses that we think suit us, clothes that we think suit us, etc., without staring at these items all the live-long day.

 

[Ellen]

I wear my studs to take the focus off my wrinkles Ira.

You''ve gotten some great answers. Put simply, they make us feel purty.

 

[katiedid]

Great answers everyone! Ira, sorry I didn''t really answer your question the first time. I guess it''s because I don''t really HAVE a good reason! Simply--I like jewelry, I like wearing it, I like seeing it on myself, and it makes me feel "put together". It just gives most women a little lift in their spirit to have nice jewelry. I probably look at my jewelry way more often than others, so I do see my earrings and pendant several times a day, every day.

I guess it''s like asking "Why do you need a nice car when an old beat up, rusted, smoking, bucket of bolts will get you from A to B just as easily?".

 

[diamondseeker2006]

For the same reason I wear make-up.

 

[Stone Hunter]

Date: 8/10/2007 10:04:59 AM
Author: diamondseeker2006
For the same reason I wear make-up.

Yes that''s it! It makes me feel better about how I look. Makes me look better and takes the attention away from my wrinkles.

If I''d only known that diamonds would make me look older I would have gotten larger studs when I was in college, and worn them every day.

 

[rainydaze]

i don''t feel i am a beautiful woman, but at least i can WEAR something beautiful! and i know when i look at other women and they are wearing an accessory that compliments them and catches the light and is pretty it has a pleasing effect. thus, i want to mimic this effect myself and wear things that might compliment my appearance and add something pleasing to the eye of whomever might behold me. when i get to look at it too, such as with rings, it brings me visual pleasure, and if i cannot see it myself, it makes me FEEL more visually appealing.

it also says something about my tastes and my personality and i could not tell you what provokes me or anyone else to express such things visually with jewelry, but it''s a motive none-the-less. in fact, jewelery does send strong messages - when i was single i wore jewelry to help give subtle cues to my personality and to enhance my appearance and thus attract admirers. now that i am married, my most precious jewelry very blatantly tells everyone i am married. my other jewelry is worn based upon whether i am taking the kids to the park (practical and sturdy), or going out on a date with my husband (impractical and luxurious), or hanging out with the girls (playful and pretty, but not too much). i choose my accessories based upon the company i will be in, as in some company it feels comfortable to wear my nicer pieces, in others it feels pretentious.

an interesting topic! who knew jewelry tied in so closely with psychology!!