Dress shopping with the groom.,

[Gypsy]

So as some of you know... I''ve already done this wedding planning stuff for tw previous wedding (both cancelled-- same groom).

I thought I''d share something... With the exception of one time when I went dress shopping with my mother, once with FMIL, and once with a friend. Everytime I have gone dress shopping it has been with my DF.

And let me tell you. For kicks-- you all should try it sometime. (If you don''t want him to see THE dress... do it with gowns you''re not going to buy). Frist of all. He gets a glow in his eyes when he sees me in the gowns. Second of all the sales ladies reactions are priceless. Some are disapproving but trying to make a sale, some are just shocked and in flustered, and others are just at sea. It''s a riot. I''ve only had one sales woman who was just fine with it and said it made sense to her.

For me, he''s my best friend. And it''s his day too. I''m picking his outfit... so, why not. Plus, the gown will look completely different (his memory isn''t that great after 2 billion gowns) on me with me all done up... and well, I get to know right then if he likes it.


Anyone else done this? Seen it done? Heard of it. Or just shocked?

 

[KimberlyH]

Gypsy,

My fiance went dress shopping with me and he and I actually chose the same dress... I have no close friends or family in the area and decided who better than him to help me shop, his opinion matters most as he''s marrying me, not my mom, friends, etc. He may have felt a bit out of place but was quite the trouper and it turned out to be a really fun experience! He also went shopping with me for my shoes.

 

[E B]

I've heard of it, and if the bride is comfortable with it, I think it's great!

I've shown FI a million *pictures* of gowns, but I won't take him shopping with me. That's just a weird, traditional opinion of mine. I want his first time to see me in a wedding dress to be on the wedding day.

 

[ephemery1]

While I don''t plan on bringing my FI with me to dress-shop (but who knows... I''m usually up for anything!), I know of a friend who has done so and I thought it made complete sense as long as she was comfortable doing so. That said, my FI is very interested, and he''s already looked online with me at some of the dresses I was initially considering. Actually, when I came home from dress-shopping last week without any pix, he was legitimately upset... I think his exact phrase was "so then how am I supposed to cast my vote??"

While shopping, I commented several times on what I thought my FI''s opinion would be of the dress I was trying on... and the saleslady reminded me "but this is your dress, not his". I actually argued back that while it''s my dress, a huge part of the fun in wearing it (for me) will be knowing that I look absolutely stunning to him... and there are certain dresses that I know he wouldn''t love, regardless of how beautiful the rest of me looks.

All that to say, more power to you!

 

[Gypsy]

It IS fun.. and everything is completely different on the day of... so what the heck! I''m glad other''s have done it too.
]

Any funny salesperson reactions? Ours have been an absolute riot. FI is good humored about the whole thing.


Kimberely... Shoes too? You can''t pay my fiance enough to go shoe shopping. I went show shopping with another bride I met at Klenfelds (wedding number two) we had the same date and it was an instant friendship... we went shoe shopping for both of us to a little place she found ... shoes were like 25 dollars and comfortable. Still got them. Undied. Waiting for THE wedding.

SD lady! Glad to hear it. Doesn''t change it. Just makes it better.

Ephemery-- My fiance would have felt left out too. And saleslady''s... honestly-- I haven''t been impressed. My response if one is particulary bad is... "It''s my wedding. My day. I get what I want, and I want him HERE, NOW." He just waits up front (doesn''t come back into the rooms if there are other brides) and if I think a dress is a possibility I show him, if it''s not... it comes off immediately. Most of the saleslady''s out here are snotty and too hung up on the way ''things are done.'' I enjoy shaking things up. Most of them say to me at sometime during the whole process, "Oh you''ve got a good one there." And I say.."I know." Plus, with the exception of one friend I''ve made here... I''m in your boat too. And my FSIL''s are all cracked. One of them kept picking up TULLE ball gowns with breading and embriodery AND lace (all of it!) oh... the HORROR. She called them princess dresses. ICK.

Ebree.. see I totally understand that... but my fiace just got twitchy with pictures... he didn''t care how something looked on a model... wanted to see how it looked on me.

 

[ephemery1]

Date: 6/20/2006 2:23:12 PM
Author: Gypsy

One of them kept picking up TULLE ball gowns with breading and embriodery AND lace (all of it!) oh... the HORROR. She called them princess dresses. ICK.

Haha... Gypsy, I''m guessing we could have similar tastes in wedding gowns! I''m okay with interesting detail... some assymetrical shirring or even a sash. Maybe lace, if it looks classic and not overdone. But tulle and beading? Not for me. Did you see the Jenny Lee I fell in love with?? Octbride posted it for me on this thread: https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/first-dress-shopping-excursion-ugh.46666/

Have you found anything good??

 

[nytemist]

I did. He saw me in about 4 dresses (none were THE dress, I''m having it made)

We happened to be driving past a David''s and he said "let''s go in, see what style you really like."

 

[anchor31]

I'm totally game for pics before the ceremony, but this, I'm not sure. I've always dreamed of going dress shopping with my mom and grandmother, ya know?

But we've looked at dresses in the bridal mag I got when we went to buy our ring, and neither of us like the big, over the top gowns we saw in there... So we agreed: No ruffles, no pick-up shirts, no ballgowns, no tulle. Maybe some lace or beading, but nothing too much. The dress I'm in love with is a very simple one, so I'm sure he'll love it too.

 

[ChargerGrrl]

Hmmm. I''m very low-key, but I don''t think I would have wanted FI to go dress shopping with me. He would''ve been bored out of his mind.

In fact, I really didn''t want anyone to go with me. I went all by myself on a weekday afternoon and walked out out of the store a few hours later with my dress! Everyone in the office was surprised when I came back with a huge garment bag. My mother was shocked. "Didn''t you want anyone else''s opinion?" Nope, just mine!

 

[Gypsy]

Date: 6/20/2006 2:54:36 PM
Author: ephemery1

Date: 6/20/2006 2:23:12 PM
Author: Gypsy

One of them kept picking up TULLE ball gowns with breading and embriodery AND lace (all of it!) oh... the HORROR. She called them princess dresses. ICK.

Haha... Gypsy, I''m guessing we could have similar tastes in wedding gowns! I''m okay with interesting detail... some assymetrical shirring or even a sash. Maybe lace, if it looks classic and not overdone. But tulle and beading? Not for me. Did you see the Jenny Lee I fell in love with?? Octbride posted it for me on this thread: https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/first-dress-shopping-excursion-ugh.46666/

Have you found anything good??

Oh I love the Jenny Lee. It''s exactly the type of dress I would like. Actually I looked through her designs and they are quite lovely. Have you decided on what you are going to do?

I am a fabric nut... I love nice fabric-- it has to feel right to my hand, be a nice high thread weave, and generally be of outstanding quality plus the gown has to overall be well constructed. But I''m on a budget (aren''t we all) so I can''t go crazy. Nice farics and simple elegant designs are the province of high end design... like Jenny Lee. And in my price range designers with styles that I like and fabrics that I would wear are few and far between. I''ve settled on Paloma Blanca because her fabrics and laces and trims for the budget are generally very good quality-- and I can order through Pearls Place or RK Bridal and get the gown at an amazing discount. My favorite high ends designer is Pricilla of Boston and Christos I love too. And Paloma has a couple of gowns that fit what I''m looking for with simple classy designs, quality silk and good contruction.

I love Alencon lace (only lace I like, actually) ... and the two gowns I am looking at have it. Here is my thread on the gowns. The one at the bottom looks awful in the picture... and lovely in real life. BTW.

 

[Gypsy]

Anchor-- It''s just a matter of what you feel comfortable with. I think it''s great that you''ve always wanted your family along... I never gave it a thought. I wasn''t like most girls dreaming of my wedding... and the gown... you know? I never thought I''d find anyone I''d want to marry, frankly. So it never came up. I think I may have felt differently if what I had in mind about the whole exerience was different-- but well... lol. To each their own.

Chargergal! That''s awesome. Really.

 

[FireGoddess]

I brought my MOH not only for sentiment but practical reasons - she was helping me get into and out of the dresses (and I don''t think the stores would have let him come in there and help me

) but I wouldn''t have any problem with it! He saw me before the wedding cuz we all rode up in the limo together.

 

[KimberlyH]

Yes, Gypsy, shoe shopping...and the bra as well. He just hangs around and waits for me to find what I like occasionally pointed out something I may have missed. I ended up with a pair of Steve Madden flip flops. My dress is so long no one is going to see my shoes and my number one shoe priority was comfort.

I''m a very concise person, I did an online search, selected 4 dresses I wanted to try on, walked into the bridal shop with the numbers on a piece of paper handed it over to the sales clerk knowing that if it wasn''t one of those dresses it wasn''t in that shop. My dress is not a princess dress, but it is very feminine and soft and I love it and I know that he''ll love it on me when I walk down the aisle because he helped choose it!

 

[Rebemdee]

My husband went with me to pick up the dress on our way to a baseball game, and we dropped it off at his brother''s house to let it air out, as it had just been dry cleaned. When I pulled it out of the bag he said, "It looks like a sack." He really had no clue that it had to be altered. When he saw it in person, on the wedding day, after the alterations, he said, "Oh, no, not sack like at all. You have boobs and a waist! I like it!"

 

[RoseAngel04]

I am very traditionalist, and I don''t think that I will be taking my FF dress shopping with me. He is also my best friend, but I don''t want him to see me in anything that is close to what I will be wearing that special day. No gown, no veil..NOTHING. I do think that looking through mags or on the net is a nice option so you can get the feel of what will work best for you both, but the in person him seeing me in my dress is a little too much, but that''s my own personal opinion. Like I already mentioned in a prior post, I want that moment to be very special, and for me it will be more special for him to see me for the first time in my gown.

 

[qtiekiki]

DH went dress shopping with me. He''s seen every gown that I tried on and we end up loving the same dress, although he also liked some dresses that I wasn''t thrilled about. In fact, he paid for the dress. We didn''t really get any shocks from our sales girl, but I don''t think she cares as long as she made a sale.

I actually took DH everywhere and asked for his opinions on everything when I was buying wedding stuffs. So he saw the shoes, the tiara, veil, jewelry, basically everything. So he knew what the whole outfit look like plus the hair and makeup trials. I didn''t think it''s a big deal then and still don''t because everything IS different on the wedding day with the hair and make-up done and all the emotions. It definitely didn''t take anything away from the special moment. His eyes still lighted up when he saw me for the first time that day.

 

[ocbride2007]

I tried the dress on once, and said I would come back and order when my mom is in town and my fiance is with me, and the salesgirl was very adamant that he not see me in it!! I don''t care, he''s already seen pictures of me in it. And seriously, he gets so critical and finicky... like every time I get my hair cut, he says he hates it... this weekend I hade it cut the same way, by the same stylist... and all of a sudden he can''t stop talkign about how much he likes my hair!! So really, I need to check in with him on this a few times. He''s got to get used to seeing it, then like it. Besides, I can''t stand the thought of him complaning, years later, that he didn''t like my dress. Because if he doesn''t, he''ll complain alright!

But honestly, I am glad he''s not just overall shopping with me, if he had to be there when I tried on everything he would die... Men just don''t get certain things... I can hear him saying "that dress doesn''t fit right! it''s too big!" and woud never be able to convince him that of course it won''t fit, they only have one size, and my size will get ordered... There is no way I will ever convince him that that is just the system and we have to deal with it. Just like I can''t convince him that we need to plan NOW so I don''t have to worry about it during the school year!! ahhh, men.

 

[Gypsy]

My fiance is funny about fit... assumes dress will fit the same way when it''s in my size as it does in the sample size. He liked one dress better than another because he thought it would fit me nicer-- when the two dresses were very similar one was just a larger size and was a different different fabric on the skirt. I tried to explain it and he was like ... okay, I know that... but I don''t want to take the chance that it won''t fit you right.

He''s not fussy about anything else... anything else, though. With each dress he''s only interested in which one will, and I qoute "show [me] off the best."

 

[gingerBcookie]

Date: 6/21/2006 12:02:38 AM
Author: Gypsy
My fiance is funny about fit... assumes dress will fit the same way when it''s in my size as it does in the sample size. He liked one dress better than another because he thought it would fit me nicer-- when the two dresses were very similar one was just a larger size and was a different different fabric on the skirt. I tried to explain it and he was like ... okay, I know that... but I don''t want to take the chance that it won''t fit you right.

He''s not fussy about anything else... anything else, though. With each dress he''s only interested in which one will, and I qoute ''show [me] off the best.''

that''s so cute!

 

[codex57]

I "shopped" with her on the internet. Like a typical guy, I really couldn''t remember it too well. Didn''t go with her to the actual store to order it tho nor was I there when it came in. So, technically, I never saw the actual dress either on the hanger or on her. Just a picture of it.