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Do you ever feel embarrassed by your jewelry?

wildcat03

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Apr 11, 2011
Messages
904
I do but I'm trying to get over it. I work in a profession one associates with making a good living and I do make a good living. But I work in a nonprofit role and definitely take a pay cut for that. My jewelry is nicer than most of my coworkers but they all pay for full time daycare (we have a part time nanny and my husband and I spend a lot of time with our daughter - which we love and would not trade for the world). They order take out or go out to eat while we cook and eat at home most of the time. They buy/lease new luxury cars every 3-5 years while we keep ours longer and buy mid-range cars. They buy (and mortgage to the nth degree) updated homes while we bought a fixer upper with 20% down and have gradually paid for renovations in cash to avoid paying interest on updates. I opted for large payments on my student loans for 10 years to be eligible for Public Service Loan Forgiveness while they all made smaller (ineligible) payments that will drag their loans out to 20-30 years. So when I feel self conscious about my jewelry or guilty for the extravagance I try to remind myself that for me, jewelry is my single luxury indulgence.
 

MrsBlue

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jan 30, 2013
Messages
673
I do but I'm trying to get over it. I work in a profession one associates with making a good living and I do make a good living. But I work in a nonprofit role and definitely take a pay cut for that. My jewelry is nicer than most of my coworkers but they all pay for full time daycare (we have a part time nanny and my husband and I spend a lot of time with our daughter - which we love and would not trade for the world). They order take out or go out to eat while we cook and eat at home most of the time. They buy/lease new luxury cars every 3-5 years while we keep ours longer and buy mid-range cars. They buy (and mortgage to the nth degree) updated homes while we bought a fixer upper with 20% down and have gradually paid for renovations in cash to avoid paying interest on updates. I opted for large payments on my student loans for 10 years to be eligible for Public Service Loan Forgiveness while they all made smaller (ineligible) payments that will drag their loans out to 20-30 years. So when I feel self conscious about my jewelry or guilty for the extravagance I try to remind myself that for me, jewelry is my single luxury indulgence.

Preach it, honey!!

Topping off those good decisions with a savvy bling purchase makes the experience so much sweeter.
 

MRBXXXFVVS1

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Dec 5, 2019
Messages
1,450
What I'm mostly concerned about is how my jewelry might make other people feel, how they might feel around me (especially if they don't know me well yet) and treat me as a result.
 

lulu_ma

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Sep 9, 2020
Messages
4,081
This is a great question. And it's so great to hear everyone's perspective.

I live in a small Yankee low-key town. I am always adjusting my (fine) jewelry depending on the situation and my mood. Mostly my (smallish) jewelry collection is really just for me to enjoy.

*Edit-Okay maybe I do feel a little self-conscious-no one except for my parents and immediate family know about my OEC yet.
 
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HS4S_2

Brilliant_Rock
Premium
Joined
May 23, 2017
Messages
1,851
This is part of the reason I got off IG. Originally I only had PS folk on there and then I made the mistake of adding my SIL (DH’s sister). It was a mistake because once I knew she was watching I felt like she judged my posts. I started to avoid sharing because I was embarrassed that she (and maybe other people) felt I spent too much money on jewelry.

Of course the reality is that I buy almost all secondhand and at pawn shops and constantly buy and sell to trade up. You wouldn’t know that though from IG, it looked like I had a mountain of jewelry!

This is off topic but....my daughter is an equestrian and she has an IG that she posts on. She would share show videos and pictures. I noticed she stopped posting and she told me it's because she felt that some people were toxic and negative. Like she was being judged for having some of the opportunities she has. It is interesting because I am the same way about my Jewelery. I actually will not wear things because in some situations I feel judged for having it. I guess this stuff happens in many different areas.
 

MrsBlue

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Jan 30, 2013
Messages
673
This is off topic but....my daughter is an equestrian and she has an IG that she posts on. She would share show videos and pictures. I noticed she stopped posting and she told me it's because she felt that some people were toxic and negative. Like she was being judged for having some of the opportunities she has. It is interesting because I am the same way about my Jewelery. I actually will not wear things because in some situations I feel judged for having it. I guess this stuff happens in many different areas.

Unfortunately, it doesn't take diamonds and dressage horses to turn people into meanies. I've been pecked at for having good posture and decent manners and those are free.

I hope your daughter continues to share and enjoy her sport with the people who love and support her.
 

marymm

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 21, 2010
Messages
5,520
Do you ever feel embarrassed by your jewelry or jewelry enthusiasm? I find myself in this situation quite often. I feel talking about jewelry in real life seems immodest, unless the other person is a true enthusiast. And I often feel self conscious about wearing it too.

No, I don't feel embarrassed by my jewelry or my jewelry enthusiasm.

I don't talk about it unless someone is asking about one of my pieces or wants advice/recommendations for a purchase of their own.

I never feel self-conscious about wearing my jewelry, but like others the jewelry I wear is appropriate (IMO) to the occasion/season.

FWIW, enthusiasm and passion about hobbies and collections and interests is the sparkly part of life to my way of thinking.

Personally I enjoy it when other people are talking informatively about their passions -- not ad nauseam of course, and allowing others to participate in what should be a conversation as opposed to a monologue lol.

If someone sees me as a jewelry enthusiast, then they are seeing part of the real me --- there is value to being seen --- and if they are judging me negatively or scorning me for being interested in jewelry and gemstones, well, I am judging them too, for their poor manners and small minds.

Still, I don't like to be the center of attention, at any time, for any reason, so if someone is carrying on about my jewelry in a way that puts me front and center in public, I shut that down fast.
 

stracci2000

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jun 26, 2007
Messages
8,342
I don't feel embarrassed by my jewelry.
I wear my jewelry all the time, and I don't care what others think. None of my pieces are so ostentatious that people would stare, anyway.
My mom and sister are jewelry lovers too, so they understand.
 

Mekp

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Oct 15, 2016
Messages
405
In real life, no, never. But similar to @Daisys and Diamonds sentiment, I feel a bit self conscious here because my collection is very, very small and modest by PS standards. I don't even have a diamond engagement ring set!
And although I love the classic pieces, I always seem to end up with unusual pieces lol
 

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 3, 2004
Messages
33,852
I just had to say that yesterday I went for a very stressful medical test. I wore my ACA ring for the first time out in public since my upgrade...I got my first compliment from the nurse. It made me so happy when I was scared about getting the test done. Bling is medicinal for me..haha

Diamond cures all sickness...;))
 

Sprinkles&Stones

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
May 19, 2020
Messages
1,992
oh gosh yeah, I feel super self conscious and embarrassed by it. Especially since most of my family are farmers, my friends don't own any bling, and I am relatively young.
I am the only person at work to wear any bling and bling in general is not acceptable in my profession.
Usually I try and dress down and 'play down' my jewelry. My most expensive piece is 10k, so pennies compared to PS. But in real life people constantly questioning me about it makes me feel uncomfortable.
I am probably one of the poorest people on PS (hello my husband is a graduate student). But i save as much as I can, limit my spending, and I don't have any debt.
But I hate having to "justify" my bling by saying things like 'well I drive a used car, I live in a 1 bedroom apartment, etc etc" We shouldn't have to justify how we want to enjoy our money.
 

canuk-gal

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Apr 19, 2004
Messages
25,644
Well I don't actually HAVE any jewellery selfies whilst in the fields, but here is where I walk everyday, across the lane from my house. I snapped these pics very early yesterday morning. And I was wearing my wellies & diamonds :lol:
PXL_20210331_074216616~2.jpg
PXL_20210331_081421679.jpg

Ain't nuthin like Tiffany and wellies!
 

canuk-gal

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Apr 19, 2004
Messages
25,644
HI:

I take keen pleasure in my jewellery--no cause for embarrassment--as it is my choice/business . I am sensible, however, to circumstances/environments that wearing certain pieces may not be appropriate.

cheers--Sharon
 

SomethingNew

Shiny_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jan 29, 2015
Messages
373
oh gosh yeah, I feel super self conscious and embarrassed by it. Especially since most of my family are farmers, my friends don't own any bling, and I am relatively young.
I am the only person at work to wear any bling and bling in general is not acceptable in my profession.
Usually I try and dress down and 'play down' my jewelry. My most expensive piece is 10k, so pennies compared to PS. But in real life people constantly questioning me about it makes me feel uncomfortable.
I am probably one of the poorest people on PS (hello my husband is a graduate student). But i save as much as I can, limit my spending, and I don't have any debt.
But I hate having to "justify" my bling by saying things like 'well I drive a used car, I live in a 1 bedroom apartment, etc etc" We shouldn't have to justify how we want to enjoy our money.

Don't be silly, and $10K is a lot and every bit of that is your hard earned money. You deserve to get what you love and be proud of your ability to do so. I don't post a lot, but from what I am seeing on PS, there's really no PS standard per say, at least not in terms of $ value. If there is a standard, then it should be in the measure of passion in whatever we love and that PSers are happy to share what we learned from experiences related to bling (afterall that's what we are all here for, right)?
 

MRBXXXFVVS1

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Dec 5, 2019
Messages
1,450
What I also find interesting is that even my best friends who appreciate and have amazing bling don't ever talk about it at all! And it feels akward to bring it up! Maybe they just aren't as into it as PSers? But their bling is soooo nice!
 

Niel

Super_Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Jul 23, 2012
Messages
20,044
I am never embarrassed and I will never feel bad about my hobbies.
Everyone’s hobby seems stupid to somebody.
 

Arcadian

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 17, 2008
Messages
9,086
I can be a bougie bitch so....no. :lol: Seriously the older I get the more my give a damn gets busted. I love sparkly rocks, so I own it. My pieces aren't all that big (at least not to my eyes) but they sure as heck look good!
 

Arcadian

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Sep 17, 2008
Messages
9,086
Erm, yes like it’s embarrassing how much/frequently I buy and then I vacillate between posting my latest purchase on PS or not.

Definitely not in front of my family and friends as well... no one in the family (except husband and kids) knows how much I have. I typically don’t wear much bling in front of family or friends.
Also don’t dare to post on IG cos of that.

My colleagues have been super supportive though, and honestly it was the place I wore most of my bling pre-covid so they get to see most of my stuff.

Wait what??? You've ....CHEATED ON US?!?!?!?!:-o

LOL

On a more serious note, share what you feel comfortable sharing. I judge no one by how much they buy or don't buy. They're life is not mine, but if its fabulous I WILL hold it against you if you don't sneak in a pic or 2 (or 5:lol:)
 

icy_jade

Ideal_Rock
Joined
May 1, 2009
Messages
6,131
Wait what??? You've ....CHEATED ON US?!?!?!?!:-o

LOL

On a more serious note, share what you feel comfortable sharing. I judge no one by how much they buy or don't buy. They're life is not mine, but if its fabulous I WILL hold it against you if you don't sneak in a pic or 2 (or 5:lol:)

Lol!!!

Ok I think most of them eventually get posted in the “What are you wearing today” thread in CS, but I don’t create standalone SMTB threads for them cos there will be too embarrassingly many... :rolleyes:


Icy we love your collection, don't hold out!

Awww thank you! :wavey:


What is this IG you all talk of ?
I wish i were one of your co-workers ....but im not sure how much work id get done - id be wanting to see your bling too much !
I enjoying seeing your acquisitions very much

IG = Instagram

Thank you for enjoying my collection 8)
 

Daisys and Diamonds

Super_Ideal_Rock
Joined
Apr 30, 2019
Messages
22,496
oh gosh yeah, I feel super self conscious and embarrassed by it. Especially since most of my family are farmers, my friends don't own any bling, and I am relatively young.
I am the only person at work to wear any bling and bling in general is not acceptable in my profession.
Usually I try and dress down and 'play down' my jewelry. My most expensive piece is 10k, so pennies compared to PS. But in real life people constantly questioning me about it makes me feel uncomfortable.
I am probably one of the poorest people on PS (hello my husband is a graduate student). But i save as much as I can, limit my spending, and I don't have any debt.
But I hate having to "justify" my bling by saying things like 'well I drive a used car, I live in a 1 bedroom apartment, etc etc" We shouldn't have to justify how we want to enjoy our money.

I need to work with you =)2

Its no bodies bussiness how anyone chooses to spend their hard earned pennies
Ill give a mum and dad the right to a raised eye brow but certainly not freinds or workmates
 

paragon1234

Shiny_Rock
Joined
Mar 8, 2020
Messages
206
No. I work hard so I like to treat myself. It's my hobby money anyway, so doesn't impact bills and normal living costs.

It's not usual in British culture to comment on people's jewellery. I like to mix my expensive pieces with 10 dollar silver things from China and no one has a clue which is which.
 

LilAlex

Ideal_Rock
Premium
Joined
Mar 3, 2018
Messages
3,585
Well I don't actually HAVE any jewellery selfies whilst in the fields, but here is where I walk everyday, across the lane from my house. I snapped these pics very early yesterday morning. And I was wearing my wellies & diamonds

Same! Spouse wears her sapphire when we hike because she knows I love how it looks in the shade under the trees :mrgreen2:.

Also: you can wear non-blingy bling. You can have a six figure Kashmir blue or Burma ruby and it will attract less attention than your average 1-ct e-ring, imo. Maybe you'd get a "That must be like a thousand dollars!"
 
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