Do I need to ask the parents!!

[2457h]

Dear All

Since I am new to this proposal issue and marriage. Do i need to ask the parents first before i propose or do i talk to them after she says YES. Please advise. Thanks.

 

[Hest88]

Depends on your girlfriend and how close she is to her parents. My DH asks for my parents' blessing, and though my sister is as independent as it gets and no one's opinion is going to stop her from marrying the man she wants, she knows it would be important to my dad so she's told her boyfriend to talk to my dad first.

You're in a slightly different situation since it's a big surprise for her, right? Any way you can mention the idea to her and see how she reacts?

 

[hoorray]

I would err on the side of speaking to them before you ask to ask for their blessing (not permission). It's hard to go wrong that way. You can tell them you want to share your plans and ask their blessing. No one would feel bad about being included in a thoughtful way, and it is close enough to asking permission that it would pass if that is what they expect. Asking for permission is dicey. I would be insulted. I would think it was cute and thoughtful if he had asked for their blessing.

 

[sxn675]

I also think that it would be good to ask for her parents'' blessing. If you''ve been dating awhile, they probably won''t be too terribly surprised and will be touched to be included. Good luck!

 

[2457h]

Thanks for all the comments...I know what to do...