Describe your dream proposal :)

[audball]

I know this has been done in the past too, but we have so many new ladies! Let's do a new rendition!

So spill. What are you hoping for the magic moment?

Things to consider:

Ring or no ring.
Public or private.
Indoors or outdoors.
Simple gesture or grand affair. Or something in between?
Do you want it caught on film (photos or video)?
Do you want an little after party to share with friends/family if it wasn't in public?
How will you spread the news?
Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences?

Who knows...maybe our wonderful FFs will have somewhere to go for...inspiration.

Ready...set....go!

 

[audball]

Definitely with the ring, for me. In it's box, down on one knee, the whole sha-bam.

Definitely private. I know Andrew is super shy and I would want that to be an intimate moment between just us too.

I don't have a preference for indoor/outdoor. I would like it to be somewhere we could go back to visit. So I'd rather it not be at home, because right now our home is a rented place that someday we'll never live in again. It would be nice to have the memory and be able to visit and reminisce.

Simple is more my style (and his). I care a lot more about what he says than the other details. If it's heartfelt and sincere, I'll be over the moon.

I would much rather NOT have a little after party. I want to relish the moment after between just us for the rest of the evening at least, if not a whole weekend. I want to get wrapped up in each other and our own excitement and not about other people's questions and such so soon. Which therefore, means I'd rather keep the news to ourselves for at least that day/night/weekend depending on the how/where and spread the news later/after. We'd probably call immediate family and a few close friends and then just post to Facebook to update the rest of the world and let the news spread that way.

Andrew knows of my preferences I think, at least more/less. I know we're still a ways off. Our ring will be here next week!!! so it'll give me the opportunity to share my preferences while we gush over it being here. Then I'll let him hide it and leave the rest up to him.

 

[mogster]

I'm engaged already and cried after my proposal, not out of joy but disappointment (terrible, I know). I didn't have a dream proposal but I suppose that if I had to go back and describe it -- private.

My now-fiance proposed at a winery. They were having an earth day fair. He asked if he could invite his friends and I said no because I had wanted it to be a date with just the two of us. We had had a wonderful lunch (the food was absolutely amazing) and started to walk around. His friends then appeared, which was fine and I didn't really think anything of it. We walked towards the golf course and now-fiance asked me to take a picture of him. When I looked through the viewfinder, it said, "Will you marry him?" He then dropped to either one or two knees (I can't remember) with two rings, his mother's, neither of which were engagement rings and neither of which fit. I felt like a deer caught in the headlights at that moment while his friends (all male, none of whom I knew well, and one of their fiancee, whom I didn't know at all) stood around and took pictures. I said yes of course, but it was just.. so.. painfully.. awkward and I didn't feel comfortable emoting in front of them so my reaction was very stifled. Afterward, we walked around the fair some more and it possibly the most anticlimactic follow up to a proposal that anyone could have had.

I know it's the thought that counts and I do acknowledge that the camera part was very sweet and thoughtful, but I can't help but look back and be a little bit resentful (again, terrible, I know). I just wish that he hadn't invited his friends, because I'd much rather have had a private moment with him than pictures of the proposal now.

 

[audball]

Oh mogster! I'm so sorry! I feel the same way. That SOUNDS awkward. Did you ever talk to him about it?

 

[maebelle]

Ring
Private.
Either Indoors or outdoors.
Simple gesture
Do you want it caught on film (photos or video)? no photos or film!
Do you want an little after party to share with friends/family if it wasn't in public? No parties, parties give me hives
How will you spread the news? I suppose we'll call our parents and text everyone else.
Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences? Yes, because he knows a public proposal would terrify me, I'm getting nervous right now even thinking about telling people, I don't like being the center of attention AT ALL

Sorry Mogster! I would be a little annoyed about that proposal too

 

[audball]

See, this is why boys should listen. If public TERRIFIES you, that's not exactly the feeling I'd want to be instilling in my intended during such a moment. At least your FF knows to keep it simple and private!

 

[audball]

See, this is why boys should listen. If public TERRIFIES you, that's not exactly the feeling I'd want to be instilling in my intended during such a moment. At least your FF knows to keep it simple and private!

 

[mogster]

Oh mogster! I'm so sorry! I feel the same way. That SOUNDS awkward. Did you ever talk to him about it?

Yes, we did talk about it but he had already proposed and I would have felt bratty asking him to propose again. While it didn't align with my expectations, it was well-intentioned and not his fault. He did set up a nice ring presentation for when the ring arrived -- a very cute cloud and trumpeting angels diorama (most important part being that we were alone when he presented it).

 

[audball]

Yes, we did talk about it but he had already proposed and I would have felt bratty asking him to propose again. While it didn't align with my expectations, it was well-intentioned and not his fault. He did set up a nice ring presentation for when the ring arrived -- a very cute cloud and trumpeting angels diorama (most important part being that we were alone when he presented it).

Well that's good. Do you love your ring at least? I don't know that I could have asked my FF to redo it either if I didn't love it, but at least you talked it through.

 

[madelise]

Awesome thread, Audball!

Poor Mogster That's so awkward to be around HIS friends, not YOURS. I'd hate something public like that, too, and worse, with his friends, where you can't just be all gushy and crap like you would with your GFS Did he get upset that you were upset?

Ring or no ring?
Of course I'd prefer the ring present but if SO totally wanted to surprise me (which I'd love), I wouldn't mind him doing a proposal without the ring, if it meant that I can pick out my own center stone and setting!

Public or private?
Private.. meaning no other friends/family present. It's okay if it's in a public setting. Wait. What's private? At home? I don't want to be proposed to at home. I want to be proposed to somewhere breathtaking and beautiful. Places I'd like: the Sears Tower, top floor in Seattle.. the one with the glass floor? I'd love to drag SO out there one day, but he's deathly afraid of heights. Maybe he can prove to me how much I mean to him if he sucks it up like a big boy? Um.. gondola rides are awesome.. somewhere with an awesome view.. something nature-y like the grand canyon? or a beautiful ocean view? In a beautiful restaurant? I want to be pretty, though, for pictures, so it'd have to be somewhere where I would naturally doll up for (I don't usually ever doll up), so I'd be picture-ready.

Indoors or outdoors?
Long hair, don't care! - Lil Wayne. OMG. I just looked up what this meant.. *puke

Simple gesture or grand affair. Or something in between?
Um, grand affair If SO did something super simple, I'd accuse him of not giving a crap to try any harder. The showoff in me wants to be able to talk about it for YEARS.

Do you want it caught on film (photos or video)?
I'm a hugeeee fan of still photography, so YES!!! I'd love that!! But it can't be a friend or family member. It'd have to be a professional. I do NOT want any friends/family present!

Do you want an little after party to share with friends/family if it wasn't in public?
We will have an engagement party, but not immediately after. And it won't be little. His culture and my culture both throw lavish engagement parties.. where the parents meet each other, family comes together, etc. Both our cultures recognize engagements as a "final step" before a wedding, so that's why we don't want to be engaged until maybe maximum 1 year until our wedding day. Otherwise, we'd be engaged with all my p-rings for a few years already!

How will you spread the news?
It won't be official until I check "engaged" on Facebook! LOL! I thought about doing traditional "We're engaged! Save the date!" mailers out, but that takes time to do, and I'm sure everyone will already know thanks to FB and talk.

Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences?
I'm positive I mentioned all of this to him.. but I have the worst memory ever. I'm a total goldfish. I tell him the same things 100x in the same day. Maybe I should forward this to him?

 

[Mico]

In all honesty... I think the only parts that are a must are a ring and dropping down to one knee. Everything else can be up to him.

 

[peonia]

oh mogster, i really feel bad for you as you say, the intention was there and it sounds like he envisioned it to be a little different in his head as well, maybe. you are a gem for being so considerate of his feelings though, and hopefully one day you will be able to take it less to heart because there's be so many special memories made by then


audball & madelise, i like your preferences here are mine!


Ring or no ring?
a definite yes. i'm pretty traditional about certain things, this being one of them! though to be honest, picking out the ring together afterwards sounds quite romantic in its own right.

Public or private?
most definitely private. that's something i've always said to SO and he knows it. i want that moment to be just us, because i think that everything that comes after (wedding, even small ones, birth of a child, etc.) we would never be quite alone. the same with madelise, if there was anyone there, i would want them to be strangers.

Indoors or outdoors?
i don't mind really.... but if i had to choose, i would say outdoors. i'm hoping to get married outside, because i like the idea of not being confined to a space and being under all the skies when getting married. which applies equally to getting engaged, but i'm not as picky.

Simple gesture or grand affair. Or something in between?
honestly, whatever SO chooses to do will be perfect! knowing him, i'm pretty sure he's planned something, but even if he were to do it spontaneously while in our PJs i would still love it

Do you want it caught on film (photos or video)?
tricky one. i would love for there to be a video of it, just so i can watch it over! (and maybe my future kids.) but that would be tricky without someone standing there doing it, which i would find a bit awkward. hidden camera would be the best thing!

Do you want an little after party to share with friends/family if it wasn't in public?
i would like to keep it to ourselves for at least that day & night. since i'm suspecting he will do it while we are in greece... i would keep it to ourselves until we get back. it would be great to get some friends together (families live abroad) for a little celebration, but nothing big.

How will you spread the news?
by phone to my closest and dearest, then facebook after the dust has settled.

Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences?
i don't think i have any must haves (apart from ring), but he knows that public is a no-no. we see eye to eye about these kinds of things though, so i'm sure it will be just perfect

 

[mogster]

Well that's good. Do you love your ring at least? I don't know that I could have asked my FF to redo it either if I didn't love it, but at least you talked it through.

Yes, because I picked it out!

Poor Mogster That's so awkward to be around HIS friends, not YOURS. I'd hate something public like that, too, and worse, with his friends, where you can't just be all gushy and crap like you would with your GFS Did he get upset that you were upset?

Ditto!! It would have been infinitely better if they had been my friends. And I don't think he was upset, just sad that I wasn't over the moon.

For the ladies that aren't having an after party, have you thought about what you're going to do after the proposal? For me, there was all this anticipation leading up to and focus on the actual proposal that after it happened, the moment I'd been waiting months for, I didn't know what to do with myself.

 

[pandabee]

Ring or no ring.
Ring definitely!! I will be sure to have a say in picking it out before, so I want to be proposed to with a ring!

Public or private.
Private, but like madelise said...it could be public as long as it's just the 2 of us? idk, I would like the idea of having somewhere to visit after, but that's not super important.

Indoors or outdoors.
as long as the weather is nice, outdoors is great! but I don't have a huge preference. as long as we're together. (awwwww.) I have seen some super cool engagement photos of the couple out in the snow or in the rain though! but I do hate the snow so it's not for me hehe.

Simple gesture or grand affair. Or something in between?
knowing him it would probably be a simple gesture. which would be great because it would totally represent him. but I do want him to try a little harder than he normally does, so probably something in between. but I wouldn't want a huge big affair (strange considering I'm a Leo and usually Leos like to always be the center of attention).

Do you want it caught on film (photos or video)?
no video, but photos definitely! I think professional would be awesome, idk how I feel about friends hiding and taking photos. in all likelihood many of our mutual friends won't be around after we graduate so if anyone is around to take photos it'll probably be profesh.

Do you want an little after party to share with friends/family if it wasn't in public?
maybe like a dinner or something? but nothing super fancy.

How will you spread the news?
calling close friends, waiting a couple days to post it on Facebook. I want to enjoy it as much as I can just the two of us before letting everyone else in on the secret!

Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences?
nope. I think I trust him on this though. I don't feel super strongly about any of the above so long as he's there and there's a ring (that I pick out hehe) and he says nice romantic things to me, we're golden!

 

[audball]

Love your ideas ladies! Keep 'em coming!

I forgot to answer one of the questions

I would LOVE for it to be photographed, but agree with others, NOT by someone we're close with. A pro, sure. Otherwise, nah. I'd rather have it alone in my mind than have to share that moment with someone in my life other than Andrew right away.

Also, to clarify, when I said public or private, private doesn't mean necessarily in your home. It meant at least mostly secluded away from people you actually know. Public also doesn't mean it has to be in front of people you do know, it could also be on stage or with a large (even if you don't know them) audience, that sort of thing.

 

[beesha77]

In all honesty... I think the only parts that are a must are a ring and dropping down to one knee. Everything else can be up to him.

Same here. He has the ring and has had it for 5 weeks and it's absolutely driving me batshit crazy!! He could tie it to his penis for all I care! Lol!

 

[maebelle]

Same here. He has the ring and has had it for 5 weeks and it's absolutely driving me batshit crazy!! He could tie it to his penis for all I care! Lol!

Now that would be a story to tell

 

[CaprineSun]

somewhere where I would naturally doll up for (I don't usually ever doll up), so I'd be picture-ready.

Indoors or outdoors?
Long hair, don't care! - Lil Wayne. OMG. I just looked up what this meant.. *puke

For some reason, the page loaded right to your post, and
I literally laughed out loud when I read this!

 

[CaprineSun]

My dream proposal really is just hoping I don't have any inkling that it's coming. My SO is just sooo bad at hiding surprises once he gets excited. Poor thing. And, I will feel disingenuous trying to looked shocked.

That's ALL I really want. To be totally surprised and to be private. I'll go back to answer the questions, now. lol

 

[gatorblue]

I love reading everyone's answers!

In college, my best friend and I would get home from class and settle in to watch Perfect Proposal (anyone else remember that show?), so I've seen a ton of amazing, creative and totally wacky ideas and always dreamed my proposal would be as memorable as those. But in reality, I know it will be memorable no matter what.

Ring or no ring. Ring, for sure!

Public or private. I'd be OK with either, as long as it's not on a Jumbotron or in a really awkward location with a huge crowd of bystanders. I'm not shy, but that would probably make me pass out.

Indoors or outdoors. Either one.. lots of great beachy settings here to choose from.

Simple gesture or grand affair. Or something in between? Something in between would be best, but I don't care what he does, I care more about what he says and I just hope I'll be able to remember it!

Do you want it caught on film (photos or video)? My *old* dream proposal was having a photo taken (like on a cruise) and turning to see him down on one knee, all while the photographer snaps away. Could be romantic, but also could be super, super cheesy. Would be really great to have photos to remember the exact moment and how we felt, but it's not a wash if it doesn't happen.

Do you want an little after party to share with friends/family if it wasn't in public? I like what a lot of you have said, that you'd want to savor the secret and share some one-on-one time with your new fiance. I think I'd hold off on a celebration until a few weeks later. I'll be surprised if our parents don't hire a marching band.. ha.

How will you spread the news? In person to my parents... then phone, Skype, Facebook to the rest of the world!

Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences? Nope. I wish they'd covered that in '1001 Questions to Ask Before You Get Married.' Maybe I'll pretend there's an extra chapter we missed

 

[audball]

Same here. He has the ring and has had it for 5 weeks and it's absolutely driving me batshit crazy!! He could tie it to his penis for all I care! Lol!

Now that would be a story to tell

OMG! This had me rolling on the floor laughing!!
It's not even mine and I have been WAITING for your story!!!

 

[Phdecorate]

Definitely with the ring.

Private, but something like on a secluded beach, etc where there might be people way in the distance would be ok. Just nothing in front of a group of people, or in a setting like a restaurant.

Doesn't matter if it is inside or out.

It doesn't have to be fancy but I want it to be thought out. Not, ok the ring is here, hey do you want to marry me, I am down on one knee if the living room type of thing. I have told SO this several times. For me, this part is important. I told him he must get dowon one knee, he needs to have something planned, a speech, etc. I want to feel like I have this wonderful proposal story even if it is just a romantic moment for two.

No video and I KNOW there won't be pics. SO Just wouldn't think that way. A friend of mine was captured on camera (a pro) and it is a great picture that is up on their wall. I think it is a great idea, but. I know it won't happen for us. Ha ha, SO was flabbergasted when I told him we would have to hire a photographer for our mini 4 person wedding!

No after party but depending on when/where we are hopefully a nice rest of day/evening for two, wonderful dinner, etc...I will call my parents and everyone else can wait a day or two!

I am playing guessing games....I think SO will ask on a beach or park walk possibly with the dog. One of the cutest proposal stories we read together was of a guy who had the one dog wearing a " marry him" t shirt and the other do with a "ring guard" t shirt. I thought it was adorable. Doubt SO would go that far, but we will see...

 

[audball]

I am playing guessing games....I think SO will ask on a beach or park walk possibly with the dog. One of the cutest proposal stories we read together was of a guy who had the one dog wearing a " marry him" t shirt and the other do with a "ring guard" t shirt. I thought it was adorable. Doubt SO would go that far, but we will see...

This is super cute! Ring Guard. Haha. Adorable. I've been kind of leary of telling Andrew about proposal stories, particularly ones that I think I'd like, because I don't think he'd then actually use any of those ideas because he wouldn't want to "copy". I've unloaded different ideas on my best friend who Andrew would likely ask for help when the time comes. She can feed him a few ideas based on what his initial plans are. Win win. I was completely involved in the entire ring process. I'd prefer the proposal actually be a total surprise now

 

[pandabee]

Same here. He has the ring and has had it for 5 weeks and it's absolutely driving me batshit crazy!! He could tie it to his penis for all I care! Lol!

hahhahha omg...no words

It doesn't have to be fancy but I want it to be thought out. Not, ok the ring is here, hey do you want to marry me, I am down on one knee if the living room type of thing. I have told SO this several times. For me, this part is important. I told him he must get dowon one knee, he needs to have something planned, a speech, etc. I want to feel like I have this wonderful proposal story even if it is just a romantic moment for two.

I am playing guessing games....I think SO will ask on a beach or park walk possibly with the dog. One of the cutest proposal stories we read together was of a guy who had the one dog wearing a " marry him" t shirt and the other do with a "ring guard" t shirt. I thought it was adorable. Doubt SO would go that far, but we will see...

I think this is the key!!! I want it to be thought out, I don't care what he does otherwise. And on the beach with dogs would be so cute!!!!

This is super cute! Ring Guard. Haha. Adorable. I've been kind of leary of telling Andrew about proposal stories, particularly ones that I think I'd like, because I don't think he'd then actually use any of those ideas because he wouldn't want to "copy". I've unloaded different ideas on my best friend who Andrew would likely ask for help when the time comes. She can feed him a few ideas based on what his initial plans are. Win win. I was completely involved in the entire ring process. I'd prefer the proposal actually be a total surprise now

great point! like I said above, this is going to be my thinking as well!

 

[star sparkle]

Ring or no ring.
Ring! I'm dying to have that sucker on my finger again, gah!!

Public or private.
Private. Not necessarily total seclusion, but I don't want any friends/family around and I don't want it in the midst of a whole group of people. Anytime we're at a sporting event and there's a proposal on the jumbotron or whatever, I cringe inside. I would HATE that!

Indoors or outdoors.
Either, I don't really care. There are some awesome outdoor sites here where he could do it that would be awesome, but at this point I just want to be engaged to him so locale isn't something I'm going to fuss over.

Simple gesture or grand affair. Or something in between?
Simple and heartfelt. I'd like to know that he gave the proposal some thought and tried to make it special for me, but I don't need anything grand.

Do you want it caught on film (photos or video)?
Nope, I would be mortified if anyone else was around watching (even a pro photographer).

Do you want an little after party to share with friends/family if it wasn't in public?
I think we'll probably do a small engagement party of sorts for our friends, since none of them will be invited to our wedding. We'd like to celebrate with them, but our wedding guest list is going to be immediate family only so a small engagement party seems like a good compromise.

How will you spread the news?
I'll probably call my mom and brother to tell them, then my closest friends will get a text, and everyone else can find out on FB.

Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences?
Yes! Anytime I see a proposal on TV or like the aforementioned jumbotron scenarios, if I really dislike the method of proposal I'll say something like "Yuck, you're not going to propose to me like THAT, are you?" So I've dropped enough not-so-subtle hints that he knows what I prefer.

 

[audball]

Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences?
Yes! Anytime I see a proposal on TV or like the aforementioned jumbotron scenarios, if I really dislike the method of proposal I'll say something like "Yuck, you're not going to propose to me like THAT, are you?" So I've dropped enough not-so-subtle hints that he knows what I prefer.

I have SO TOTALLY done this too. Haha.

 

[star sparkle]

Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences?
Yes! Anytime I see a proposal on TV or like the aforementioned jumbotron scenarios, if I really dislike the method of proposal I'll say something like "Yuck, you're not going to propose to me like THAT, are you?" So I've dropped enough not-so-subtle hints that he knows what I prefer.

I have SO TOTALLY done this too. Haha.

Another method I like to employ is a simple, funny, said with a straight face "Babe, please don't _______."

For example, we were watching a TV show one time and a guy proposed to his gal when they were out for dinner and he had the ring put into her champagne glass. I calmly turned to BF and said "Babe, whatever you do, please don't put my ring in a glass of champagne. Or anything else for that matter." Then we burst out laughing because apparently I looked so serious when I told him that it was just hilarious. But on the plus side, he promised he wouldn't do that.

 

[Phdecorate]

Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences?
Yes! Anytime I see a proposal on TV or like the aforementioned jumbotron scenarios, if I really dislike the method of proposal I'll say something like "Yuck, you're not going to propose to me like THAT, are you?" So I've dropped enough not-so-subtle hints that he knows what I prefer.

I have SO TOTALLY done this too. Haha.

Another method I like to employ is a simple, funny, said with a straight face "Babe, please don't _______."

For example, we were watching a TV show one time and a guy proposed to his gal when they were out for dinner and he had the ring put into her champagne glass. I calmly turned to BF and said "Babe, whatever you do, please don't put my ring in a glass of champagne. Or anything else for that matter." Then we burst out laughing because apparently I looked so serious when I told him that it was just hilarious. But on the plus side, he promised he wouldn't do that.

Me too. Also, I was always worried it would be on a holiday. Seriously, right before Christmas, he told me "I don't want to disappoint you but I don't want to get engaged for Christmas. I want it to be its own day." All I could say was "thank g--, me too!!" so at least we are on the same page about that!!

 

[Schafenm]

Ok here is mine:

Of course the ring must be there!

I really do not have a preference on indoor or outdoor.

I really want a grand gesture, but I would be happy with just him asking me. My DREAM proposal would be on NYE, but I can never mention that to him because I would expect it. If it didn't happen then it would be so disappointing. So that will stay my little secret.

I would not mind it being caught on film. We will just have to wait and see.. hehe

I do not want a party afterward. I know NYE dream and no party. I would love to have a room at one of the hotels in new orleans to stay at the night of and have mimosas and breakfast in bed the next day.

I plan on calling everyone a few days after. It will probably take a while to go on facebook, I am not that big of a facebook person.

We have talked about what we are comfortable with so that no one is disappointed. But all the details are up to him.. That is the exciting part, not know when or what is going to happen.

 

[LoveLikeCrazy]

Ring or no ring.
RING!

Public or private.
Either or.

Indoors or outdoors.
Either or.

Simple gesture or grand affair. Or something in between?
Not simple enough that he did absolutely NO planning or anything special. Its gotta show that he put some thought into it. I mean I'm picking the ring so he can't cop that as thought haha..

Do you want it caught on film (photos or video)?
Photo from a bystander would be nice...like a nice candid.

Do you want an little after party to share with friends/family if it wasn't in public?
God no.

How will you spread the news?
Facebook...LMFAO and in person, text message, video chat...shouting from rooftops...

Does your FF know of any 'must haves' or 'absolutely nots' in terms of your preferences?
Must be from the heart, must show some sort of planning...LOL And please do it before i am so old i won't enjoy it as much!