Career Advice ?

[Gypsy]

So before the holidays I was frazzled and disgusted with my job I was seriously considering just walking out.

Synopsis:
Hired on 18 months ago under one manager (who is the reason I accepted a job), who was laid off due to internal politics a week after I started. I''ve been bounced along since from manager to manager. My peers have been reduced from 4 headcount to 2 (because people keep quitting) within my group. And my group itself is full of people I can''t stand (one of whom just quit yesterday).

Basically as PP put it, they need to put the org chart on a whiteboard and install a revolving door. OR, shockingly... get their sh*t together.

SO on Monday we got a glimmer of hope... our new Director started, he''s my direct manager, and he SEEMS to finally be a step in the right direction.

The job market is tough, and if I stay, AND he delivers what he promises, I will get a lot of valuable (marketable) skills and experience within the next year and a half... and I''d be able to leave this place to a much better job.

But I am still fed up. Fried. And just sick of this place. But, I wonder if I shouldn''t just grit my teeth and see what happens. Part of me says, take the first offer you get and LEAVE the assylum.

I feel like I''m in an abusive relationship. I don''t want to be the woman who stays no matter how many times she''s been smacked around. But I also don''t want to be the one who quits without trying reconciliation when a true chance at reform comes up.

And maybe, I just needed to vent.

 

[somethingshiny]

I have no advice for you because neither option seems "wrong." I''m sorry you''re going through this and I hope you find a way to be more content.

 

[decodelighted]

I can''t recall for sure ... but haven''t you had similar situations in at least the last three of your previous jobs? Could some of the problem be your own expectations that the NEXT place will be better ... that ANY place will be without drama/turnover etc.

NOT SAYING that''s the case -- but maybe its something to think about before you head for seemingly greener grasses *this* time around.

And if I''m totally off base & remembering incorrectly ... OOPSIES.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

My best advice would to be to give this new guy a chance. In the meantime I would pursue a hobby (hopefully you know what I am talking about) on the side that you have that COULD lead to a more fulfilling and creative career than contracts can offer you. I think it would take some of the focus off of how unhappy your job makes you.

 

[Gypsy]

Deco, last job was Demon Boss, loved everything else but her. And she was certifiable. But yes, it could be me. That''s option B. Take a leave of absence (FMLA protected leave) and re-evaluate life for a month.

Tacori, that''s a good idea. I do need a hobby. Especially with John working weekends. Need to work on that. Thank you!

Hi Somethingshiny... and thank you ((hugs)).

 

[alli_esq]

I don''t have anything wiser to say than the posters above me...but, as someone who knows how miserable a terrible work situation can make your life, I just wanted to give you a virtual hug. I can really relate to your feeling like you are in an abusive relationship--that is exactly the comparison I used to make when I was a position much like yours.

I hope this whole situation can rectify itself very soon, one way or the other, and that you come out of this quickly.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Gypsy, I think it would allow you to focus some of your energy elsewhere. We all need hobbies

You are so talented. Life is not a dead end. (((hugs)))

 

[jewelz617]

A job is just a means to an end. A career is something you really build on, grow with and make a living on. If you consider this more in the job field, it may be time to bail.

Would you be happier elsewhere? If so, dust of those resumes, cast the net and see if you get a bite. But don''t just leave out of aggravation. This new manager could greatly improve on your experience there. If not, hopefully your planning will pay off and you will have another offer lined up.

 

[neatfreak]

I''d probably take some mental health time and then go back and see if it''s any better. I also wonder if the new director would be interested and or willing to hear about all the crap that goes on there now so that maybe he could take it in a new direction?

But the commute blows-so I would probably leave for that reason alone if you can find something else.

 

[Haven]

Hey Gypsy,

I just wanted to say I''m sorry that you''re dealing with this. I know what it feels like to be in a job that feels like an abusive relationship, I was there a short six months ago. While I definitely don''t know what the right decision is for you to make right now, I can tell you that when you do find yourself in a better place career-wise, it feels really good. Here''s a big virtual hug until then.

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 1/6/2010 7:50:46 PM
Author:Gypsy
So before the holidays I was frazzled and disgusted with my job I was seriously considering just walking out.

Synopsis:
Hired on 18 months ago under one manager (who is the reason I accepted a job), who was laid off due to internal politics a week after I started. I''ve been bounced along since from manager to manager. My peers have been reduced from 4 headcount to 2 (because people keep quitting) within my group. And my group itself is full of people I can''t stand (one of whom just quit yesterday).

Basically as PP put it, they need to put the org chart on a whiteboard and install a revolving door. OR, shockingly... get their sh*t together.

SO on Monday we got a glimmer of hope... our new Director started, he''s my direct manager, and he SEEMS to finally be a step in the right direction.

The job market is tough, and if I stay, AND he delivers what he promises, I will get a lot of valuable (marketable) skills and experience within the next year and a half... and I''d be able to leave this place to a much better job.

But I am still fed up. Fried. And just sick of this place. But, I wonder if I shouldn''t just grit my teeth and see what happens. Part of me says, take the first offer you get and LEAVE the assylum.

I feel like I''m in an abusive relationship. I don''t want to be the woman who stays no matter how many times she''s been smacked around. But I also don''t want to be the one who quits without trying reconciliation when a true chance at reform comes up.

And maybe, I just needed to vent.

The job market IS tough. I''d see what The new director does, give him some time. You say he seems to be going in the right direction. Give it some time. If after a few months, things aren''t going any better, talk to recruiters.

But since things are so rough, I''d give this job a shot, and as Tacori said, you have soooo many talents. Maybe this is a time where you do consulting on the side. You are a natural at it. Just a thought, wishing you all the best.

My DD is looking for her first job and it''s not easy...

 

[KimberlyH]

If I were in your shoes I would stick it out for a bit under the new director and see how things go. I''d work closely with him to ensure you get what you want and need out of the situation and then if still miserable move on.

 

[perry]

Gypsy:

I do understand. Short term ups and down; and management termoil is so much fun...

Here is what I have done numerous times: Give it a year to see if things get better. Also, I do have a private sit down talk with my supervisor/manager about what their expectations really are - and may discuss some of my frustrations (in a non-threatning way).

I also have looked deep within myself to see if the situation was right - or if I was creating some of my own problems (and about 1/3 of the time I figured I needed to improve or change).

In most cases things got better. In some cases it was obvious that they would not - or that I was really not the right fit.

I have negotiated my exit from more than one company where the fit wasn''t right. It has the advantage that you can openly job hunt; and because it was done up front and honestly - I have reaped many rewards (I still talk with one of the companies - and we help each other).

Best wishes for you - whatever you decide. Just be sure if you move on that you are really moving into a better situation.

Perry

 

[iheartscience]

I''d stick it out and see how it goes with the new director. If you can learn new, marketable skills I''d focus on that and work on not letting work drama get you down.

And I''ll leave you with some of my favorite words of wisdom from my mom: "That''s why they pay you to go there!"

I always tell myself that when I''m not loving my job and it actually works sometimes!

 

[VRBeauty]

Date: 1/6/2010 9:09:45 PM
Author: Kaleigh

The job market IS tough. I'd see what The new director does, give him some time. You say he seems to be going in the right direction. Give it some time. If after a few months, things aren't going any better, talk to recruiters.


But since things are so rough, I'd give this job a shot, and as Tacori said, you have soooo many talents. Maybe this is a time where you do consulting on the side. You are a natural at it. Just a thought, wishing you all the best.

Ditto. (Can I still say that here?).

For me, I think that the key would be what kind of shape I'm in at the end of the workday or on weekends. Whether I could leave the job frustrations behind (at least half my responsibility!) so I could recharge and enjoy friends or consider hobbies, or whether the job -- not my reactions to it! -- intrudes on and poisons amost all aspects of my life. There's nothing dishonorable about doing what you're paid to do well during the day, and then leaving it behind at night.

Considering today's economy and the likelihood of finding a better situation, I think I'd stay put for now unless the job was really eating me alive. That doesn't preclude you from exploring other options... it does put you in a better negotiating position if other you identify other options! Plus, you won't be taking on the added stress of needing to find a job and of dealing with a smaller household income.

Good luck! I hope this guy is able to deliver, or at least to improve your work situation.

 

[LtlFirecracker]

If the job market was good, I would tell you to move on.

However, I just dealt with my FI who was laid off for 6 months, had nine interviews in CA and could not get a job. Luckily I was moving to Texas (where the job market is better) and he landed a job here pretty quickly.

I am guessing you want to stay put which means dealing with the CA market.

What about giving the new guy a try, but having a set amount of time you are going to give it? If things stay the same after that time period, maybe you want to take the first offer you get and leave. If things get better, give it a year and a half, and than take all the experience you gained and use it to benefit another company .

Of course only you know what is best.

 

[Lilac]

First, I just want to say I''m sorry you''re so unhappy right now. I know what it''s like to hate your job and it really is a bad feeling. I stayed in a job I hated for a year and a half longer than I should have - and it was only part time, so I can''t imagine how much worse it is when it''s full time. *hugs*

I think if you believe there''s a good chance there could be improvements with this new director you should stay and give it a few months. The job market is *bad* right now and if there''s a chance it could get better I think you should give it a shot. Make a deal with yourself - if you''re still as unhappy as you are now in 6 months, then you''ll leave and give it all you''ve got to find another job. Worse case scenario: things stay the same, but hopefully you''ll at least feel better knowing you only will be there at most another 6 months if it stays bad, and best case scenario: it gets better and you end up happy at your current job!

Good luck!

 

[Mara]

While I know a lot of people who have gotten jobs, I also know a fair amt of people who can't find jobs, one of my friends husband has been out for over a year. Depends on your line of work around here, what niche you fit into. I am not sure what your line of work's 'market' looks like, but you probably do. I would def take that into consideration.

If the market was better I would not losing your mind is most important. And assuming you guys had savings. I've quit a horrible job with my own Demon Boss and 2 weeks notice not knowing where I was going or what I was doing only that I couldn't stay there anymore nor did I have to.

My next job I made sure I contracted for over a year to ensure I loved the place and my team. There has been upheaval from time to time, but that is just the way it is, esp in corporate environ's. You will never love everyone and/or get along with everyone.

You have opportunity for change with this new Director. I'd give it a chance...and even if you only stick it out another 6 months or make it a year, then that is time that hopefully will help the job market...and you can always look in the meantime.

I do echo Deco though in that you may want to mentally spend some time evaluating your own expectations on your career and your environment req's. Maybe a career change or working for yourself is in order. I enjoyed contracting, somehow it seemed to be a little less dramatic that way.

 

[Gypsy]

Okay so... in no particular order (LOL)...

It''s become a job, but once upon a time it was a career.

If I stay 6 months (or even 4) I get my bonus, which is a nice amount of money. So... that is one reason to stay.

If it gets worse again, I can take a leave of absence.

I can agree to trying it out for 4 months (until after my bonus) as long as I look for other opportunities.

And I can try to make sure my new situation doesn''t end up being the same as this one... both by learning the personal lesson''s this place has taught me, and by not running away to another job. But making sure that I''m running TO the other job, and that I really want it. Not just changing jobs because I want out of here.

Thanks all who responded with advice and concern and caring. Much appreciated. I needed a little perspective. ((HUGS))

 

[zoebartlett]

Gypsy, I''m sorry you''re going through such a difficult time.

I felt like I was in an abusive relationship before I quit my former job in October. I would strongly recommend that if you feel like your spirit is breaking (sounds corny but that''s how I describe it), that you look for something else. Life is way too short to be so miserable in your job. It would be great if you thought that you could suck it up and stay until you gain skills, etc. that you want/need, but I wouldn''t recommend doing that if it gets harder and harder to stay each day.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

Gypsy-I''m so sorry you are going through this. My DH is in a similar situation and it really sucks! I say take a week''s vacation, start looking for a new job, stay 4 months, get your bonus, see how the new director pans out, and re-evaluate in 4 months. Put it on your calendar so 4 mo doesn''t turn into 6 doesn''t turn into a year...if you know what i mean.

Also, I''d pursue your hobby as much as you can.

just my 2 cents...