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Can I change my mind on BM dresses?

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So_happy

Brilliant_Rock
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Nov 12, 2006
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I have very recently decided to go with another gown and the style is different than what I had before. The first one was satin, simple, strapless and had a pick up skirt with no train and this one is an a-line, assymetrical waist maggie with crystals. I don''t think there is a huge diff in formality of the gowns except for maybe the train, the organza overlay, and the fancier embellishments on my maggie gown but I''m thinking it might be look nicer with a different BM dress.

As of right now, I''ve chosen the designer (Alfred Angelo), color (victorian lilac), fabric (satin), and skirt length (floor) for the girls. They can pick from within those parameters. Now that I have this new gown, tho, I feel like I want to re-choose my BM dresses. 3 of 5 BMs have tried on dresses and of the 3, my moh is the only one who thinks she knows which dress exactly she will get...but hasn''t yet deposited. The deadline I gave them is the end of February to deposit on thier gowns and as of right now, it does seem like they are all waiting until the last day to do this.

Given that no one has deposited or fallen absoulutley in love with a particular dress, is it okay to change at this point? If I did, I would probably extend the deadline by another month or maybe even 6 weeks so they can do some more searching.......but is that cool to do to them? I feel badly to do this but I think once I saw the dresses on thier bodies last month, I realized they look like they belong in another''s wedding
And now that I have another gown......it is a good time to switch if I can/should.

What do you all think? I would love to change the parameters to some kind of flowy material (chiffon perhaps?) in a tea length skirt. Same color and right now I dont'' have a designer loyalty for BM dresses.
 

larussel03

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Oct 22, 2005
Messages
1,747
I was soooo indecisive regarding a BM dress--I knew I wanted black cocktail, and I kept flip flopping b/w choosing one for them all to wear or letting them all buy their own. I know it would have been easier on them to just choose their own, but none minded at all when I changed my mind, and they kept saying to not worry so much about them b/c they''d be happy wearing anything I chose. We ended up going all together (in 2 trips) and they all loved the dress (simple A-line tea length jim levkoff dress with champagne colored sash), so in the end it worked. The deadline for deposits was the end of Feb for us too, and only one has to put her deposit down (she was out of town when we went, but it was the only time I''d be around and she''s pretty much waiting on my mom to take her b/c she''s not from MA -- I may ask one of my other BM''s to take her though to get it done with).

So basically, as long as no deposits have been put down and you''re willing to work WITH them, and there''s a few weeks, I see no problem. They were planning on having to come up with the money anyways, and I wouldn''t mention the extended deadline thing unless you have to. It''s good to be flexible, but if they procrastinate on deposits anyways, I''d hold off unless you all aren''t decided on what they''re wearing.
 

So_happy

Brilliant_Rock
Joined
Nov 12, 2006
Messages
1,084
Sweetpea, thank you for sharing your experience :) I think that I was so freaked out by all that it takes to plan a wedding that I picked everything really important within the first month (gown and bm dresses) and have now begun to devolop actual bridal preferences. I should have let being engaged "brew" a bit before doing this but I thought this was just what I had to do. Now that I''ve seen hundredes of pictures of weddings etc, I feel if I got engaged now, I''d be in a much better place lol. I just started clueless I guess :)

How long SHOULD BMs give for thier dresses to come in. Is it the same as our gowns? Is 6 months a long time? Normal time? Perfect?

Thankyou!
 
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