Can I ask for some advice on a friendship?

[Upgradable]

Well, I'll just summarize one last time:

If you are okay with doing all of the work in the relationship, with always asking her to do things knowing that there is a fair possibility that she is only saying yes because she doesn't want to hurt your feelings, and if having workplace companionship is that important to you, then there is nothing wrong with continuing exactly what you're doing.

If it were me, however, I wouldn't put much effort into it beyond maybe asking "Hey, I'm about to eat lunch, want to join?" etc. because I'd hate for you to waste your time and energy and have your feelings hurt in the long run.

 

[minousbijoux]

She creates unhealthy obsessions in her mind, doesn't quite see reality, has a drinking problem, and uses you as an emotional dumping ground and you want more?

Really?

What, exactly are you getting out of this..."friendship?"

You say you try to mentor her. You have recommended her for a promotion. Does this girl somehow make you feel better about yourself? Ask yourself the difficult questions. She's a mess, you aren't. But sometimes, we do have the need to be appreciated and self promoted. The thing is, we don't need it from people like this. When we feel this need, it is usually because we aren't giving it to ourselves.

This girl is a black hole.

Go fill yourself and your time with something TRULY fulfilling. Then, when you see her whirlwind, you will have the ability to smile, send her a bit of love from your heart, and move on with your happiness.

<3

This, exactly. Really well said and great insights into what Bugs may be getting out of it.

 

[GirlyGirl]

I agree with others that she may be limited as a work-only friend. She seems to have issues that would interfere with a two way relationship. She seems to like you. Let her ask you if you would like to join her for coffee during lunch.

She is booked out for months? Is she Jennifer Aniston's hair stylist? Come on!

I understand how hard it is making female friends as an adult.

 

[mary poppins]

You are trying to have a healthy relationship with someone who is not capable of having healthy relationships right now. Keep her as a work friend/acquaintance for what it is and move on as to finding real friends and otherwise occupying yourself.