Bridal Shower Help!

[nicoleben]

Hello everyone!!

Havent posted in quite a bit... so my bridal shower is in about 2 months exactly. My mother had mentioned about having a display of gifts instead of having people wrap them, bring them, and I open them there. She feels its a big waste of time. However, in my opinion I feel like it may come off offensive to some. #1 I do not think its right that people openly display their gift, they may not have as much money as others and get a simple gift.. this may be embarrasing to some. #2 I feel like opening gifts makes it more personal... I dont know maybe im wrong. I just dont want to offend anyone. I totally agree with my mother that it takes up a lot of time. So Im torn. At the same time, I am not hosting my shower, it really isnt up to me, and I know it won't come back on me personally.. Any suggestions? or responses? How did your bridal shower go??

 

[Haven]

Who is hosting this shower? I would just ask her (or them) what they had planned, and tell your mom that the hostesses planned for you to do XYZ.

I think this is a cultural thing. All of my Greek friends do the gift display thing--they put little cards with the name of the giver next to each gift and display them on a long table at the shower. I thought it was nice, but if that's not what you'd like to do, don't do it! We opened our gifts at our showers and it really doesn't take *that* much time. I never loved the practice, but it's what the hostesses wanted us to do, so we did it.

Enjoy your shower!

 

[vc10um]

I would talk to the hostess and let her know your preference, then direct your mother to speak with her, since it is the job of the hostess to decide. We also opened gifts at my shower, and Haven's right, it really doesn't take THAT much time...especially since for me, it was the only real "activity" besides eating amazing food and chatting with one another. No games, no quizzes, no nothing, and it was perfect. So if your hostess has a lot planned, the display might be a good idea, but if not, the unwrapping thing at least gives a lot of picture opportunities. And in the end, you find out what each person brought anyway, whether you display them or just open them and set them off to the side.

 

[AmeliaG]

I feel like opening gifts makes it more personal...

I agree and I'm from a culture that displays gifts at weddings but we never do for showers. We always open the gifts at the shower.

Everybody's going to know what everybody else got you either way so if your guests choose to be embarassed by a less expensive gift, there's nothing you can do. I wouldn't worry about it.

But I would prefer to open the gifts at the shower as you suggest.

 

[zipzapgirl]

I think it depends on how many guests are at the shower. If <20 guests, then it is your call. If >20 guests, please ask people to wrap in clear or display the gifts. Anything more than 45 minutes of gift opening starts to get tedious in my opinion. Also, some people feel really really unfomfortable as the center of attention, so I think for those people, not having to open gifts in front of everyone is a blessing. Just make sure guests are informed in some way beforehand on the invitation so everyone has the right expectations, especially the more traditional guests.

 

[nicoleben]

I guess i should have said that almost 100 people are invited to my shower.. The open gift idea seems reasonable. I know this may sound weird and some people are against it, but my mother, my soon to be mother in law, and my bridesmaids are all hosting the shower. May not be proper etiquette for my mothers to be hosting it, but i would hate for my bridesmaids to spend all this money on me.. 100 people is a lot. We are going to have an open display and on the invitation just put something to the extent of ... be green, dont wrap your gift please! or something like that. Its a brunch, 3 hours long.. and we have tons of games planned.. they always are fun to some.

thanks for your responses!!

 

[Haven]

HOLY MOLY! 100 people! That's huge!

Okay, I don't think I'd want to sit and open gifts from nearly 100 people either. Your mom's concerns totally make sense to me, now. That would definitely take a long time.

Enjoy your shower!

 

[slg47]

HOLY MOLY! 100 people! That's huge!

Okay, I don't think I'd want to sit and open gifts from nearly 100 people either. Your mom's concerns totally make sense to me, now. That would definitely take a long time.

Enjoy your shower!

agreed! if it is 100 people...definitely do not open gifts! and have fun at your shower!

 

[Future Mrs. Sterling]

Display all the way! That is a huge shower!

 

[Autumnovember]

Display the gifts, definitely.

I don't think its weird at all that your MIL, mom and BM's are hosting the shower.

 

[nicoleben]

Ok great, I feel much better. Yes quite a lot of people.. Its insane. Our wedding, 240 people are invited, I want to cry especially since we are paying for all of it ourselves, and I am stressing over everything!!!! We just plan on getting a loan now so everything is paid for and we can just pay on a loan..bring my stress level down a bit at least..

 

[Amys Bling]

With 100 GDR display them baby and enjoy spending the time with your guests. Also my mom, FMIL, and bridesmaids hosted my shower too! It's definitely becoming mote and more popular to do that at least recently.

 

[nicoleben]

Great, yea I am glad they are helping pay for it actually. It means a lot because my soon to be MIL just loves doing things for me.. shes been putting baskets together as gifts and picking up gifts to give people for coming. She's amazing. Same for my mother. I told her if it was going to be this huge expense we don't have to have one, and she without a doubt said if it came down to it she would pay for the whole thing because i deserve it. I am so very blessed for my family! Thank God!

 

[Tigarlily1]

I opened gifts at my shower. I had 50 people and it did take a long time. Some people stopped paying attention. But really what else is there to do at a shower?