Beggars

[that_someone_special]

Do ya tip beggers?

Kidding, kidding. With the snow melting, and the sun coming out more, the beggars have been back on the streets! There is an area of like 3 blocks that I have to drive any time I go anywhere that involves the highway and there are beggars out pretty much all day. Different ones sometimes, but usually the same one. Just to get on the highway, I probably pass 4, just on MY SIDE of the street. In my general area there can easily be 10 beggars on a 3-4 block radius (both sides of the street).

I saw a sign yesterday that said, "I know you work hard for your $ but could you please help me. Need $. Thank you" I would''ve given something, but I never carry cash. I almost wanted to grab money from an ATM and give him a $20. But, I didn''t. I''m a jaded money giver.

There was a guy last fall, oh god I hated his guts. His sign read something along the lines of "Need money, $5''s and $10''s appreciated." WTH!!! He wanted a minimum of $5? Don''t waste his time with your lowly $1s! Of course, i always got stopped right at the light, and he always gave me these dopey eyes that I should give him money. HECK NO.

I have a friend that buys food to keep in her car to give to the beggars. A few times she had food throw back at her and people yelling they need MONEY not FOOD.. ok!

How do people feel about this?

For the most part, I am really jaded about giving money. The last time I remember giving money, I was scammed and it made me mad ever since. I live in a highly populated area that has lower-middle class to upper class homes so there is a huge mix of people.. I LOVE it!!! What I don''t love, are the people that are on the same street corner, every single day. Some people, obviously need it... but I wonder about the people that are sitting there smoking a cig, beer in a paper bag, and nicer shoes than I own on...

Anyways, there was a solid 3 months there were it was too cold to beg, and it was nice.

The warmer that it gets outside, the more crime that happens in my area too. I hear more gun shots as well. LOL

 

[jewelz617]

I give money when I can. I know it''s probably not a smart decision, but I don''t care. It makes me feel better.

 

[that_someone_special]

I forgot to mention... there was some kind of.. backpack beggar movement in my area last summer. It was so strange! There was a huge group of very tanned, very dirty (actual dirt), younger *hippies*.. I''m not quite sure what they are called. But they would beg in groups. I do live in a pretty popular area for young people, so it''s not weird that they were here, but they all had a huge backpack, some kind of sleeping bag/ something to sleep on, and a few had animals. (Which had me wondering how well those animals were taken care of.. but whatever.) They left around fall time, but I wonder if we''ll get a new group this year. THOSE people I''m 100% sure needed the money for food, alcohol, water, and dog food.

Anyone know what I''m talking about or live around areas like that?

 

[that_someone_special]

This made me giggle.

 

[Dancing Fire]

the best sign i''ve seen was....heck,i''ll be honest.i need money for a 6 pack!!

 

[charbie]

When I was in college, a feature on the main drag just off campus was the "rapping bum." He would rap all day long about needing money, ohio state football, and any other topic you would ask him to rap about. Rumor always was that he had a home and a car, and earned his living rapping for drunken college students. I would give him money.

But the guys who would tell me daily about their daughter being in the local hospital and how they needed money for her care...(mulitple bums told this story)...they didn''t get a penny from me.

 

[yssie]

I give food. We buy boxes of crackers, cereal, prepackaged snacks, extra fruit, etc. from Costco to give away. I won't give money unless it's at a booth for a specific cause.



I feel like you can usually tell if someone genuinely needs help by the response you get.

 

[rierie26]

Date: 3/5/2010 11:47:52 PM
Author: swedish bean
I forgot to mention... there was some kind of.. backpack beggar movement in my area last summer. It was so strange! There was a huge group of very tanned, very dirty (actual dirt), younger *hippies*.. I''m not quite sure what they are called. But they would beg in groups. I do live in a pretty popular area for young people, so it''s not weird that they were here, but they all had a huge backpack, some kind of sleeping bag/ something to sleep on, and a few had animals. (Which had me wondering how well those animals were taken care of.. but whatever.) They left around fall time, but I wonder if we''ll get a new group this year. THOSE people I''m 100% sure needed the money for food, alcohol, water, and dog food.


Anyone know what I''m talking about or live around areas like that?

We have a lot of them here in SF and in Berkeley. It makes me kinda conflicted to see these young kids (and hey, I''m 26 so not that old), doing this. It upsets me that these young able people don''t try to contribute to society, but then I have to pull back and remind myself that I don''t know the circumstances that put them on the street. I always wonder how they got to that point at such a young age, was it by choice or did something happen that forced them to do this? I definitely feel bad for their dogs, I doubt they''re getting the proper care from these guys just judging by the looks of the dogs.

 

[that_someone_special]

Kitcha- Here is a link on Wiki on some info that I know SOME of them subscribe to. (I knew of a few people that do/did this) Linky

For these people (at least the ones I was talking about), it's a choice to live this way.

Here is the first paragraph on the link:
"Rainbow Gatherings are temporary intentional communities, typically held in outdoor settings, and espousing and practicing ideals of peace, love, harmony, freedom and community, as a consciously expressed alternative to mainstream popular culture, consumerism, capitalism and mass media."

I just get tired of seeing it all over the streets. But maybe I should be more understanding. I'm not sure... but definitely read the link!

ETA: That link is the name of a gathering, here is the link on the people in the gathering LINKY

 

[that_someone_special]

Date: 3/6/2010 12:14:04 AM
Author: yssie
I give food. We buy boxes of crackers, cereal, prepackaged snacks, extra fruit, etc. from Costco to give away. I won''t give money unless it''s at a booth for a specific cause.




I feel like you can usually tell if someone genuinely needs help by the response you get.

That''s so sweet of you!

 

[Brown.Eyed.Girl]

Date: 3/5/2010 11:56:15 PM
Author: swedish bean
This made me giggle.

LOL. I would give this guy money

 

[MichelleCarmen]

There are a lot of people on the freeway exits and street corners holding up signs around where I live and it''s reached the point of saturation where I don''t even really notice anymore. I''ve always been a firm believer in giving food rather than $ so I buy food for the food bank.

 

[Imdanny]

The last beggar I saw was about a year ago. I bought a meal at McDonald''s and gave it to him. I didn''t ask him if he wanted it. I just went through the drive through and did it. He was very happy with it. Also the next time he saw me he waived and smiled. I''m sure he appreciated it. It made me feel good too.

 

[mrscushion]

I give food (I ask first if they would like it), but not money. I don''t believe the money goes anywhere good.

 

[Mrs Mitchell]

I give money if I can afford to. I don''t give food, drinks, clothes etc unless that''s what someone asks for. If I give someone money, they can spend it on what they want to - no strings.

When I was about 16, I went into town with my best friend and we got outrageously drunk. The person who found us in a collapsed state in a doorway was the beggar who had planned to sleep there. That gentleman put us in a taxi, went through my friend''s purse to find her address, gave us his emergency £5 note for the fare and told us never to do it again.

I have never forgotten his kindness to two idiot brats who could have got themselves into a whole heap of bother that night.

 

[that_someone_special]

Mrs Mitchell- WOW what a story! Things like that really stay with you for life don''t they...

Although the money probably wouldn''t go to a place where I would prefer it to go to, I guess it''s not my place to say what they can and cannot do once I give them money.

The last person I gave money to (he begged and begged)... I had I think 3 or 4 quarters in my pocket, gave him 2. He promptly walked across the street and got into a NEW Audi. He said he needed it for bus fare. I was a broke college student and felt bad for the guy. I was SO mad at myself for getting duped I have not given since then.

.. Oh maybe I have? Now that I think about it, I may have given some money to someone on a freeway off-ramp... hmmm.. well anyway!

 

[Lula]

I don't give them money or food. Not because I am some heartless jerk, but because I have worked with adults who have serious and persistent mental illness, some, yes, who are also veterans, who often end up homeless because they have untreated mental illness that keeps them from benefiting from the social programs set up to serve them.

You are right, many of them choose this lifestyle because it means they don't have to work. This is often because they are so addicted to booze and cigs that they could not hold down a job if they tried.

Many of them are very good at knowing where to show up for free food, and where to go at night so they are safe and warm (in the basement of our state Capitol, is one example) and where they can't be kicked out by law. The signs you see with their stories are often just that -- stories, and are meant to prey on your sense of pity, empathy, and guilt.

The reason they want money is because they can't buy beer and cigs with a McDonald's gift card. The reason they don't want food is that they know where to get free food.

I know I may sound like a creep, but until I worked with people one-on-one, and learned how they are able to survive for years -- in some cases decades -- like this, because they don't want to play by the same rules people who don't abuse drugs and booze do, I used to give them money, too, because I thought I was "helping" them. Now I make sizeable, tax-deductible donations to the many agencies who serve this population, and I don't feel bad or guilty or walking by any of them.

ETA: Note I said "untreated" mental illness above; this is because people who are able to get treatment for a mental illness are able to function in life. Untreated mental illness is a huge, awful problem in this country, especially when it is combined with its twin demon untreated substance abuse.

 

[MonkeyPie]

My problem is that I can''t tell if they honestly need it, or if they just want to go get high with the money I give. And while that makes me feel terrible, I just can''t bring myself to do it.

There is one gentleman that stands on a corner near my house and waves and smiles at every single person that goes by. He doesn''t have a sign, but his clothes are tattered and he''s painfully gaunt. If I were going to give money to anyone, it would be him.

 

[arjunajane]

Date: 3/6/2010 10:15:08 AM
Author: sarap333
I don't give them money or food. Not because I am some heartless jerk, but because I have worked with adults who have serious and persistent mental illness, some, yes, who are also veterans, who often end up homeless because they have untreated mental illness that keeps them from benefiting from the social programs set up to serve them.


You are right, many of them choose this lifestyle because it means they don't have to work. This is often because they are so addicted to booze and cigs that they could not hold down a job if they tried.


Many of them are very good at knowing where to show up for free food, and where to go at night so they are safe and warm (in the basement of our state Capitol, is one example) and where they can't be kicked out by law. The signs you see with their stories are often just that -- stories, and are meant to prey on your sense of pity, empathy, and guilt.


The reason they want money is because they can't buy beer and cigs with a McDonald's gift card. The reason they don't want food is that they know where to get free food.


I know I may sound like a creep, but until I worked with people one-on-one, and learned how they are able to survive for years -- in some cases decades -- like this, because they don't want to play by the same rules people who don't abuse drugs and booze do, I used to give them money, too, because I thought I was 'helping' them. Now I make sizeable, tax-deductible donations to the many agencies who serve this population, and I don't feel bad or guilty or walking by any of them.


ETA: Note I said 'untreated' mental illness above; this is because people who are able to get treatment for a mental illness are able to function in life. Untreated mental illness is a huge, awful problem in this country, especially when it is combined with its twin demon untreated substance abuse.

Very good and thought-provoking post Sara. It sounds as if you have a good solution for those who would like to help but are not keen on the idea of handing out cash.

Fortunately, where I live the homeless problem sounds a lot less than what the majority in this thread have described.
I think I've only ever seen maybe a total of 10 or 15 actual "beggars" in my city in my time.




To answer the original Q - if I'm approached by a youth at a train station asking for "bus fare" etc, and they do it politely, with a smile or a bit of humour - than if I have the change handy I'll give it to them.
I bought a macca's burger for a kid once and he was very grateful.
I'm not stupid and know it's most likely not for a bus; but 99.9% of the time in my city they are indigenous (Aboriginal) youth who are severely disadvantaged in our society and I have compassion for them.
I did have one scenario actually about a couple weeks ago when leaving my local corner deli, a man approached me asking for change to use the phone box for an international call to a sick relative (?). Purely by coincidence, I happened to have a calling card on me that I'd purchased a couple days before to call a US vendor - I gave him the card and explained it had about $10 of credit on it, how to use it etc - he looked pretty perplexed, lol..Maybe he thought I was FOS, or perhaps he didn't actually need to make a call. Ah well, it made me feel like I'd done a good deed for the day *shrugs*

 

[arjunajane]

Date: 3/6/2010 10:46:05 AM
Author: MonkeyPie
My problem is that I can''t tell if they honestly need it, or if they just want to go get high with the money I give. And while that makes me feel terrible, I just can''t bring myself to do it.


There is one gentleman that stands on a corner near my house and waves and smiles at every single person that goes by. He doesn''t have a sign, but his clothes are tattered and he''s painfully gaunt. If I were going to give money to anyone, it would be him.

Would you try to give him food instead MP, seeing as he seems to have caught your attention.?
(just out of curiosity).

 

[whitby_2773]

i give money to the Salvos (Salvation Army). they''ll provide food, clothing, shelter, money for utility bills, rent, and so on and so on re all the legitimate needs to people who really need it. i figure they''re in a better situation than me to do so.

and i''ll give money to virtually anybody who comes to my door asking for it if they have a charity collection badge.

i *have* given money to a few people on the street - but i tend to avoid it. i dont trust the process, dont know what i''m giving money to, don''t know what i''m funding.

when i was back in australia, i used to volunteer every monday evening at a church funded coffee shop for transsexual prostitutes. every sunday i used to work serving up breakfast for homeless men. both of these were in sydney''s inner city, both took considerable amounts of my time. both required my money on occasion. i liked those processes because i knew exactly what i was giving and where it was going and would have done it indefinitely.

i guess i just dont think that the person living on the streets is a good budgeter, and is generally not the person to be put in charge of money - even small amounts.

i have about the softest heart in the world, and am incredibly easy to hit up for money or whatever if asked. but i''ve learnt through experience that there''s many way more effective ways to help people than slipping them $20. and believe me - my experience with homeless men and women has taught me that there''s quite the network going on, and those people know where to go for help if they want it.

what i tend to give money to these days are things like sheltered workshops, job training programmes, rehab programmes - that sort of thing. am i beyond giving someone $20 and a hot meal? nope - and i do it, too. but it''s not my first choice because i know it rarely helps in the long run.

what i''m not gonna do is give money to someone just because they entertain me by putting something funny on a board, dress up to look amusing, or are simply persistent at my car window. if they''re still able to do *that*, they''re able to get down to their local homeless shelter to get a feed and a bed. it''s the SHELTER that needs the money. i give there.

 

[Maisie]

We have a charity here in the UK which offers the homeless the chance to earn legitimate money. They sell a magazine called The Big Issue on the streets. The homeless person buys the magazines from the charity for 85p each and sells them to the public for £1.70. There is a woman who sells these magazines on our local high street. She isn''t British and doesn''t speak much English. I am assuming she came here to claim assylum (I could be wrong of course) and I don''t understand how she is homeless when there are so many handouts for assylum seekers here.

I remember the magazine was only £1 a couple of years ago. The price has almost doubled. I know that it might sound mean but its easier to spare £1 than almost £2. Especially when you are on a limited income yourself.

 

[Indylady]

I live downtown, and there are a few homeless individuals that I see around, including a single mother with a 3 or 4 children, and I always give her food if I see her. Sarap, I really enjoyed your post. I''ve taken a few courses on the the welfare state, and I really appreciate hearing all of the different experiences people have had with it. Welfare is quite a problematic issue; it involves judging who deserves, and who needs it, and inevitably some that need it don''t get it, and some that get it could do without.

 

[that_someone_special]

Good, thoughtful posts everyone!

I do wonder what happens to all of the homeless people in my area in the dead of winter. In the spring in summer there was almost a "camp" set up under one of the major highways here. Every time I got off the ramp I would look over and see a bunch of people, with furniture (chairs, old lay-z boys, mattress'') and just hanging out. Well the cops went in, destroyed it, got rid of the furniture and put up higher fencing (like a chain link fence would stop anyone..).. but anyway, around fall time there weren''t any people left.

With unemployment at such a high rate, and people losing their homes, I would think homeless shelters would be at a high right now... can they house all of the people that need a shelter/ bed in -10 degree weather? Makes me so sad. I mean, I ASSUME they have a place to go, since you just don''t see any until it hits 30-40 degrees out.

One thing that I have noticed is that most of the beggars in my area are really young now. Like, under 25ish. I see a lot of the same ones day after day and I get really sick of them. Something tells me that they actually don''t need the money and just don''t want to work (the young ones that are clean and clothed well). It also makes me sad because that spot could be given to a person that actually needs it. I dunno.

I once saw a woman that had a sign the size of those project poster boards. It had her whole life story on it, she made bad choices, has 3 kids, needs money for a mortgage. For added measure she had her kids there with her on the side of the road. And, she was actually at those lights you stop at to get on the highway- the metered lights. THAT annoyed me. I saw her again this last spring, again at the metered lights, but a lot fatter (pregnant maybe?) and had a folding chair to sit on. She had her 13ish child running around to collect the money from the cars while she sat on her butt. Ahhh. It just annoyed me so much. How embarrassing as a young kid having to go begging off the highway ramps for your mother while you should be in school...

 

[that_someone_special]

Date: 3/6/2010 12:12:14 AM
Author: Dancing Fire
the best sign i''ve seen was....heck,i''ll be honest.i need money for a 6 pack!!

I don''t think it''s my business what they use it for, but some how the "honest" signs make me mad and yet relieved at the same time. I can relate to just needing a drink. but in the long run, I guess it doesn''t really help anything.

 

[lulu]

I always give money even if I think it''s going for drugs or liquor. I know it won''t help the big picture, but maybe I can give them a better hour. And it makes me feel better.

 

[MakingTheGrade]

A homeless mentally-disturbed man came up behind me the other night and hit me in the head. I wasn''t seriously hurt, and when I turned around, he kind of scampered away muttering something entirely nonsensical at me. I was sure he was much more afraid of me than I was of him. I watched him settle down to smoke a cig and sleep over a grate.

It was sad...

 

[Lilac]

If I have money to give, I try to give to people on the street who say they need it. It''s true I don''t know if they *really* need it or not, but if I give to five people and it ends up that even one of them truly needs the money, at least I was able to help that one person. My father always did that and I''ve learned that from him. I would rather end up taking the chance that I gave to people who don''t need it than passing by people who really do need help.

 

[Lilac]

edit - double post

 

[reader]

The homeless woman in my town doesn''t want money. She would like you to go into stores she isn''t allowed and purchase things for her, she will give you the cash. She may even like a ride every now and again. She fears living indoors, and says she has the most beautiful home in the world, the outdoors.

Her parents live near me, and was part of a petition to have my backyard taken out for an alley to park SUVs. When she heard that her parents were doing this, she made sure to put a stop to it. My town has an anti camping ordinance specifically to target her sleeping downtown. Sigh, all she wants is to wear all white and be left alone.