Bad to worse, just found out SO needs new kidney

[kenny]

Just found out both of his kidneys are destroyed by decades of uncontrolled diabetes.

They're going to check me to see if I'm compatible.
If not, perhaps someone in his family is.
If not ... waiting list.

Pardon my French, but Fvck!

 

[luv2sparkle]

I am so sorry, Kenny. Awful news for you both, I hope someone is a match for him.

 

[tyty333]

I am sorry too Kenny. Fingers crossed for a match close by.

 

[OoohShiny]

I'm sorry to hear that, Kenny.

With luck it won't take long to find a match, so I'll cross my fingers for you.

 

[lyra]

I'm so sorry Kenny. I hope he can find a match soon. Is his diabetes under control now?

 

[Arcadian]

Kenny my sympathies to you both. I hope that someone close to him is a match.

 

[Queenie60]

Sending good thoughts your way Kenny. I’m sorry to hear this news and with the best for you and your SO. Let’s hope for a match. Take care Kenny, you’re in my thoughts.

 

[missy]

Kenny I am so sorry. That is terrible news and I hope your SO can find a good match and have a successful transplant.
Sending good thoughts and gentle hugs to you both.

 

[KaeKae]

Oh, Kenny, I'm so sorry.

 

[Slickk]

I will be sending thoughts your way. Hoping a match will be close family and quick! <3

 

[mochiko42]

I'm so sorry to hear that, kenny. I hope your SO gets matched with a liver soon.

 

[PintoBean]

I'm so sorry Kenny!!! What can @jordyonbass do to help distract you even for a moment?

{{{hugs}}}

 

[Bron357]

Oh no, sorry to hear this. Hoping your SO can be matched up with a new kidney in the near future.
Sending hugs from Australia.

 

[kmarla]

I’m so sorry to hear this. I hope that a match is found quickly and your partner’s health can really improve. You guys have been through so much.

 

[junebug17]

I'm really sorry kenny and I hope a match is found soon.

 

[Calliecake]

Kenny, I am so sorry.

 

[december-fire]

Kenny, I'm so sorry to hear this.
Like everyone else, I'm hoping that a match can be found among family and friends.
Try to look after yourself as much as possible under the circumstances; with so much stuff to deal with, it would be easy to get run down.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Kenny, I am so sorry to hear this. I don't live in your state but I work for an organ transplant center. If you are willing to donate they will do a "chain" until everyone has what they need. Where I live the wait list for a kidney is 3-5 years so that would be the quickest way to get a transplant. Otherwise he will get points for being on dialysis. So people on it longer are higher on the list. I will warn you where I live there are some strict regulations to be considered. My best advice is COMPLIANCE. Anything they say (gain weight, lose weight, medication, fluid intake restrictions, etc) DO IT. Don't miss appointments. Make sure you can let them know he has so much social support (trust me, that is huge) and can financially afford it (including medications post). They have special fundraising they can suggest if that may be an issue. Luckily the recovery for kidney is way easier than other organs. Let me know if I can answer any questions for you. Best of luck.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

Also see if they provide caregiver supports. If not through the transplant center, they do have support groups. Caregiver fatigue is a real thing and you need to take care of yourself.

 

[Calliecake]

Thank you for coming to this thread @Tacori E-ring .

Kenny, I went thru this last year with a family member who had a double transplant. Tacori gave you excellent advice.

Please take care of yourself.

 

[AGBF]

I didn't know you worked for a transplant center, Tacori. I started out my social work training on the pediatric dialysis unit of a major metropolitan hospital and on the pediatric floor where many pediatric kidney patients were treated. Since I have a friend who does social work in an adult dialysis unit now, I know how much has changed in the past 25 years. There has been a lot of progress.

@kenny-I know this is huge and frightening for you and your SO and I am wishing you all the best.

Next week I see my nephrologist. I have had compromised kidneys for a number of years and may, at some point, need dialysis or a transplant. I, therefore, keep my eye on the progress in the field of kidney transplantation for personal reasons.

 

[Sparkles88]

I’m so sorry to hear this Kenny, take care and stay positive, I hope you receive some good news soon.

 

[tkyasx78]

I am so sorry. I hope they find a match very soon.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Kenny
Sorry to hear this news.. big HUGS

 

[arkieb1]

I've been wondering how you both are, sorry to hear about your SO, sending lots of hugs your way that someone is a match and can help him.

 

[windblownhair]

I’m so sorry to hear that. Hoping a match comes through soon!

 

[CareBear]

*HUGS* I hope a match is found for your SO very soon Kenny!

 

[kenny]

Thank you all for the kind good wishes.

I was impressed and grateful that all three of his brothers immediately offered to be donors.
I have not begun my research on all this, but I'd guess since they have identical parents, and therefore DNA, his siblings hold the highest odds of a good match.

His granny has around 180 descendants (they've lost count), and most of his family is close so I think he has a better chance of staying off the waiting list than the average American.

His nephrologist told him his life is about to change radically, and as his caregiver so is mine.
Money may be an issue, so I may sell the FCDs and a couple other things to help.
Priorities.
May sell his car as he may never drive again due to one of his eye's retinas being severely damaged.
The eye will be the next priority his team will address.

PSA: Folks, if you have an SO who never sees a doctor please FORCE him/her to.

 

[jordyonbass]

So sorry to hear Kenny, I hope a suitable donor is not too far away. And I hope your SO looks after his permanent loan as well when it is found.

 

[kenny]

I'm so sorry Kenny. I hope he can find a match soon. Is his diabetes under control now?

Yes and no.
He's on meds, but refuses to eat right, which makes me pull my hair out.
It's the source of endless fights.
Junk food is an addictive drug.

It's also a cultural/family thing.
Yesterday his mother brought him a V-Day gift that included sugary candy.
Today in the hospital I threw it away, which really pissed off my SO.
I hate treating him like a child ... but ...

... and yes, I will avail myself of the care-giver support groups and training.