Ask her Parents Permission? With or Without the ring?

[Hansel]

Should I ask her parents permissions with or without the ring. I was thinking about taking them to a fancy restaurant, and then asking them there. My folks, my mom I mean, thinks I should show them the ring when I ask. My sister thinks that''s tacky. My aunts agreed with my mom. My dad didn''t care. So now I am asking you: FRIENDS, ROMANS, COUNTRYMEN...err wrong speech.. Give me your opinion, ask permission with or without the ring?

 

[anchor31]

Personally, I don''t see what the point would be in showing them the ring. I tend to agree with your sister, seems a bit tacky to me. Have you asked your mom and aunt why they think this?

And as a hopeless romantic, I think your fiancée-to-be should be the one to see it first!

 

[sunkist]

I agree, no need to show the ring to her parents. What''s the point? Do they have to approve of the ring or something?! If they, for some reason, ask if you have a ring you can just tell them yes. I think that''s as far as parents should be included on the ring.

 

[JDgirl]

Another vote for not showing the ring. I agree with your sister...it seems kinda tacky to me too. In addition, I think your GF should get to enjoy the ring before he parents do.

 

[Waited2Long]

+1 for no ring...unless your gf''s parents are from the same town as your mother and aunt.

 

[moon river]

I agree with the no ring. It would be more special to your fiancee if she was the first to see it.

 

[monarch64]

+1 more for not showing them the ring. I don''t think you should have to prove anything to her parents...your asking for their blessing and their daughter''s hand in marriage is quite noble enough. I say leave well enough alone in this case. Best of luck to you!

 

[LizzieC]

I agree with the above. My sister''s FI showed my parents the ring when he asked them, and they thought that was weird. Therefore, my FI didn''t when he asked them.

 

[ello]

Nope!

 

[Petra]

I don''t get this asking permission thing. If they say "no" are you going to leave your life''s love and not marry her? And if you would marry her anyway are you really asking permission?

If you need to ask someone permission to get married you''re too young to get married.

 

[JDgirl]

It''s really more asking for their blessing, than for their permission.

 

[Hansel]

Date: 1/28/2006 9:02:01 AM
Author: Petra
I don''t get this asking permission thing. If they say ''no'' are you going to leave your life''s love and not marry her? And if you would marry her anyway are you really asking permission?


If you need to ask someone permission to get married you''re too young to get married.

Very good point. I will say "I would like to have your blessing."

 

[MiniMouse]

Hansel, surprise your girlfriend with the ring, not her parents, after all it is for her. She will have plenty of opportunity to show it off once she receives it.

 

[GGLW]

Me too on the "no need to bring the ring" bandwagon. For all the reasons previously stated.
I think it is respectful to ask for their blessing.
My parents are pretty non-traditional and surprised me the other day by saying that they would like to be asked before someone proposes. I was shocked since they are not usually into anything conventional, but I was glad they told me so I could make sure my BF is not caught off guard.

 

[XChick03]

My stepfather has made it clear that he wants my boyfriend to talk to him before he proposes to me. Since, they''re both golfers, my boyfriend decided they''d just go golfing and he''d talk to him then. But showing him the ring is out, I may be selfish, but I want to be the first person to see it! So, I think it''s pretty one-sided on the "no showing of the ring."