Are you doing a brunch? When are you telling guests about it??

[Carats]

FI and I disagree about this.

We are sending out a save the date through our wedding website. It has all our information, wedding time and place, etc on it. However, the major problem is the brunch afterwards. Do most people have this for their guests? We want to do this but we don''t have all the details about the place and time established yet; so should we send out the save the dates for our august wedding since it is already getting late and then add the brunch info later as we figure it out?

I think we should send the save the dates and add the brunch info later? either on the website or when we actually send out card invitations? I don''t think we should hold up save the date emails for an august wedding based on brunch information that will take a while to get established! FI keeps saying that if we don''t have it go out with the save the dates people will make plans ahead of time and not attend, etc. I don''t think thats true. What do you all think? How did you handle this?

 

[sillyberry]

I agree with your FI. If you want everyone to attend the brunch, and you know for sure you are going to have one, I would go ahead and add it to the Save the Date and website. You can just mention that there will be a Sunday brunch - no need to give specifics.

It can be super frustrating to make plans thinking you are just attending a Saturday night wedding (particularly if you are coming from out of town) and then have to either switch your plans or miss out a fun event!

 

[mrscushion]

I would not hold up sending the save the dates, as you are starting to get on the late side for save-the-dates. However, do you have to put the details? Can you just put a placeholder for "day-after brunch at 10am" without location details? That's what we put on our wedding website, and I think it worked quite well.

 

[sparklyheart]

For a wedding I was just in, I received an invitation to the brunch about a week before the wedding invitation arrived. I think it would be fine to post something on your website about a brunch but just say location to be determined or something so people don''t start asking you as soon as they see it.

 

[marlie]

We are doing this in a sort of weird way i guess.

in with our invitations, we are putting a card that has invite info for the rehearsal dinner and sunday brunch. we''ve gotten a special rsvp card created for those invited to all 3 events (fri dinner, wedding, sun brunch). it leaves a space for people to rsvp for each. we figured this was better than sending 3 separate invitations. i''ve seen this a couple of times amongst my family and friends and it''s pretty convenient. plus, we''ll get all the info back at one time. for those who are not invited to the fri rehearsal dinner and sun brunch, they''ll just get the wedding invite and a regular rsvp card.

i think you should include the brunch info on the save the date. maybe just say sunday brunch or post wedding brunch on suchandsuch date.

 

[sunnyd]

We did our brunch for out of town family only, which was communicated by word of mouth, informal emails, etc.

 

[CurlySue]

We''re doing a brunch for out-of-towners, so we aren''t broadcasting the info on our website. We plan to include a brunch invitation to the out-of-towners with the wedding invitation.

With that said, we''ve already started spreading the word informally to close friends and family about it, so they know what to expect.

I think if you are inviting all your guests to the brunch, you can put the info on the website noting that details will be communicated later.

 

[elrohwen]

We did a picnic the day after our wedding - we just rented a pavillion thing and had burgers and hot dogs. We put it on our wedding website and we also sent out an email to pretty much everyone letting them know and trying to get a rough head count. Unfortunately, nobody really responded to our email, so we actually had the dj announce it during our wedding and people wrote if they were coming or not on the back of their place cards. At the end of the night we picked them up and were able to get a head count.

I love the idea of having an event the day after the wedding as long as it''s not causing too much extra stress.

 

[RaiKai]

We had a brunch the following morning; but it was more of a "come if you want" sort of deal rather than a formal event. Ours was a destination wedding, so we thought it would be nice to spend some more time with some of them before everyone went back to their corners of the country. On our invites, we just informed people they were welcome to join us for brunch on the Sunday (at the resort we were all staying at) around such-and-such time if they chose. When guests arrived at the resort, they were also given a "reminder" in their check-in package about the brunch. We had not sent out save the dates though.

I think letting people who are flying in know about it is a good idea, especially if you are having out of town guests as they want to organize flights in order to attend the brunch. This can be done by word of mouth and other informal methods. Since you do not know all the details, I think it is more than acceptable for the details to follow later via website/invites.

I don''t know though, this is just my own perspective. I don''t make PLANS when I get save the dates (I never sent out save the dates, and never knew they existed until the last year or two!). I wait until I get the invites. The save the dates just let me know "oh, alright, well, I guess there is a wedding on such and such a date - I''ll keep my eye out for the invite! And if I am an out of town guest, I am already planning to be there for most of the weekend anyway, so not that concerned with being formally advised of a brunch?