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are you a shy person IRL??

Dancing Fire

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Joined
Apr 3, 2004
Messages
33,852
:bigsmile:
 
Yes, horribly. Im lucky my husband is a people person though, he gets me through alot of situations that normally I couldnt/wouldnt do on my own.
 
Yes, somewhat. I've become much more outgoing, especially in college, and I was quite shy as a kid. Now I'm able to meet new people and have a conversation and most would never guess I'm shy, but I do have some mild anxiety about it and it's not as easy as I make it appear. Also, when starting a new job or meeting new people, I tend to come off as very quiet until I get to know people better - I'm really not a quiet person, but I lay low until I can get a read on people and feel comfortable coming out of my shell.

Unfortunately, as a kid, I was sometimes labeled a snob, which seems common with shy people :(sad Because we don't know how to talk to people, they assume we don't want to talk to them.
 
No, but I'm definitely reserved at first.
 
More so now than when I was younger. I am more reserved now.. My friends wouldn't say I am shy... I am comfortable in most settings, and am social. But truth be told would rather stay in than go to parties, etc... I am over that stage...
 
Definitely - I'm not comfortable in social scenes where I don't know people, and I don't like being the centre of attention at all.. I'm never going to be a genuinely outgoing person, but I'm much better at faking it than I used to be.
 
elrohwen said:
Yes, somewhat. I've become much more outgoing, especially in college, and I was quite shy as a kid. Now I'm able to meet new people and have a conversation and most would never guess I'm shy, but I do have some mild anxiety about it and it's not as easy as I make it appear. Also, when starting a new job or meeting new people, I tend to come off as very quiet until I get to know people better - I'm really not a quiet person, but I lay low until I can get a read on people and feel comfortable coming out of my shell.

Unfortunately, as a kid, I was sometimes labeled a snob, which seems common with shy people :(sad Because we don't know how to talk to people, they assume we don't want to talk to them.
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I could have written your whole first paragraph (and was going to until you saved me the time!). I'm actually a shy person, but because I moved around a lot I developed the ability to be able to talk to people and seem much less shy. I'm a total extrovert, which helps, but I definitely have anxiety about talking to new people.
 
Unless we have some passion in common to get the conversation ball rolling, (or alcohol) yes.

This rarely happens . . . who the hell's nerdy enough to be into diamonds, raising shrimp, playing classical piano or macro photography? :roll:

Plus I'm a homebody.
I stay home with my SO and don't get out to meet new people.
Actually that's exactly the way I like it.
 
Nope, not at all.
 
I wouldn't say I'm shy but I am an introvert. Some people may consider this shy but I don't.
I was very shy when I was young.
 
I used to be shy, and although I'm definitely still pretty quiet, I'm not sure I'd describe myself as shy anymore. I won't get on stage, but I'm okay speaking to a room full of kids. I do get really nervous when adults are observing me in my classroom though. I fel much more comfortable when I can observe others (I love people watching!) or get them talking.
 
No, not at all!
 
sctsbride09 said:
Yes, horribly. Im lucky my husband is a people person though, he gets me through alot of situations that normally I couldnt/wouldnt do on my own.
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Replace husband with boyfriend and this is me.

I working at overcoming some of my shyness and social anxiety issues and I feel that I'm doing better then I was a year ago.
Yay me :bigsmile:
 
I'm shy. I have social anxiety disorder, and it's completely debilitating. For example, I have a friend that I've known since we were five years old. If she calls me on the phone, I won't answer, because i'm too scared. :blackeye:
 
Yssie said:
Definitely - I'm not comfortable in social scenes where I don't know people, and I don't like being the centre of attention at all.. I'm never going to be a genuinely outgoing person, but I'm much better at faking it than I used to be.
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Yup, this is definitely me also. "Faking it" is my answer to getting through life, lol.

My husband is a shy person too. He talks my head off at home, so it's really weird when we get around other people and he's all quiet and reserved.
 
I'm not shy at all, I am very friendly and gregarious, and I make shy people around me feel at ease because I can hold pleasant conversations with the most introverted people. It think it stems from the fact that my dad was a diplomat, and we had to host a ton of "cocktail-type" events where we had to circulate the room, mingle and make small talk.

I am also very comfortable in front of large crowds, in fact I was selected as my kindergarten valedictorian (at 5) based on my ability to memorize a speech and speak in front of a large crowd without breaking down from stage fright.

I do want to point out, however, that this is very different than being a totally-obnoxious-run-off-my mouth-attention-seeking-whore though. I speak when I'm called upon to speak, and that's it. ::)
 
When I meet someone new it seems that either we click and conversation flows
or I get very quiet.
 
No.
 
Jaysonsmom--I am very much like you. Not a shy bone in my body, and I don't mind at all getting up in front of crowds large or small.

I wouldn't say it has all come naturally. There have been times I have forced myself to speak publicly, or to do cold calling at work, or to approach strangers, but every time I jumped the hurdle of actually doing it, it's paid off and made me more confident. I totally understand having anxiety about it. My anxieties are more transportation-based and they are really irrational, because I did not used to have some of the issues I now have as far as driving or riding in a vehicle as a passenger. It's tough, and I can compare the two (social anxiety vs. transportation) because they can both be debilitating and you are very hard-pressed to get through everyday life without dealing with either.
 
redfaerythinker, I'm so sorry, that sounds really hard! :(sad

I'm not shy at all. Speaking publicly does not bother me at all. I do come across as pretty reserved when meeting people. People used to tell me that they found me intimidating when they first met me. Because of this, I've been working on smiling and maintaining a welcoming body language all my life. I think I've made good progress over the years.
 
Nope, not really shy. Maybe for the first few minutes, but then I just chill out and start getting comfortable and then I'm no longer shy at all!
 
I'm weird.

I am shy in most situations. I don't like networking and get very embarrassed easily.

However, I do really well at parties and meeting friends of friends. I become a social butterfly. BUT headed to the party I get all kinds of anxiety. We went to one on Sat night and in front of the building, I wanted to turn around and go home. Once I was there, I got everyone on the dance floor :D
 
Not at all. Ever. I am very outgoing. I do have a b*tch face though. When people do not know me they think that I am a snot, but once they talk to me and see how laid back I am I normally get along great with everyone. I think that it comes from my line of work. I meet every type of personality and very rarely is there someone that I cant have a great chat with. I guess it is part of my job description to build rapport with people. I find it very easy and it is fun to talk to new people.

My coworkers call it story time with Radiantquest when I get to chatting with them. I will talk about anything. I dont care. (Unless of course, it is inappropriate) Many people have told me that I am very easy to talk to.
 
I am painfully shy :errrr:
 
Not so sure I would say shy necessarily..I just am quiet around people I don't know b/c I'm kind of a dork and I don't want people to not like me. I'm socially awkward I think.
 
I was always terribly shy but have learned over the years to be at least a little more out going.
 
I always wonder this about shy people--can you identify what makes you shy? In other words, why is it hard to talk to people you don't know well?

I'm actually really curious about that, and always have been. I've never been shy so I can't relate, and I always wanted to ask someone IRL why she's so shy, but of course I'd never really ask a shy person why she's shy because that would be rude. Is it rude to do it here? If so, sorry. If not, please do answer.

We know friends of friends who are so very shy it seems debilitating. They're a couple, the man works with my best friend's husband and they've known each other since high school. They literally will not speak at social events unless someone speaks directly to them. Otherwise, they just stand around or talk very quietly to each other.

If you're shy, do you find that people sometimes mistake your shyness for stand-offishness? Does that bother you?

Sorry for all the questions, this is something I've always wanted to know. The other thing I've always wanted to know is what deaf people hear/see/experience in their minds when they think to themselves. (Example: I hear a version of my voice when I think to myself.) None of my deaf friends have ever been able to answer that question, which makes me even more curious. Off topic, but that's just the other question I've always wanted to ask people and finally being able to ask shy people about their shyness has made me overzealous. :cheeky:
 
Very much so. It's strange; I can be around friends and I can be around strangers. But being around people I 'sort of' know if hard as I don't know how to act.
 
thing2of2 said:
No, but I'm definitely reserved at first.
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I was going to type no, but Things answer is better. I am not shy I just don't like people, or care to like them. People just tend to let you down; so what do I have to gain by being extroverted?

If in the fullness of time a persrn turns out to be a good one then well and good; but I judge first and allow myself the luxury of being wrong; if I am.
 
Not just shy.. social anxiety shy.

Fi is the exact opposite. He has a million friends and continues to meet more. I prefer the friends I already have.... :P
 
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