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are people's words any good nowadays?

Dancing Fire

Super_Ideal_Rock
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Apr 3, 2004
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i paid $400 to put up 20' of new fences. my neighbor said he'll come by to pay me his share of $200. this was in April and he still haven't knock on my door to pay me. :rolleyes:
 
I'm sorry that you are dealing with this. Unfortunately, in my experience, most people's words are not good. It's really sad. :(
 
Unfortunately, in most cases, I do not find that people really mean what they say. With regards to fences and neighbours, it happened to us too!

We HAD to put the fence up because their dog was ruining our back garden. They said they would pay half but didn't. It cost us £1000. :errrr:

However, the fence meant that the garden survived and we were able to sell and move shortly afterwards.

Sorry DF! I know how you feel! :nono:
 
susimoo said:
Unfortunately, in most cases, I do not find that people really mean what they say. With regards to fences and neighbours, it happened to us too!

We HAD to put the fence up because their dog was ruining our back garden. They said they would pay half but didn't. It cost us £1000. :errrr:

However, the fence meant that the garden survived and we were able to sell and move shortly afterwards.

Sorry DF! I know how you feel! :nono:
my other neighbor paid for different section of the fence so i just wrote him a check for my half.luckily this was only $200,but still... :rolleyes:
 
Have you tried a gentle reminder? Or left them a copy of the bill divided in two so they know you are expecting them to pay?
 
Knock on his door.
 
Go knock. We were the offenders in the exact same situation. Our neighbor kindly allowed us to pay back within the year because DH was out of a job. Time went by and we simply forgot. The neighbor sent a polite message, and we paid back immediately with an apology.
 
kenny said:
Knock on his door.

I would absolutely knock on his door. Odds 50:50 are he forgot or thought he could get away with it. Make sure you bring a note in case he is out saying "Sorry to have missed you, I called about the money for your fence. Don't forget your share is $200 and I am happy to take a cheque. In case I miss you this week I'll be back on Friday next at 7.30pm. Have a nice day & See you soon, DF."
 
Steal said:
kenny said:
Knock on his door.

I would absolutely knock on his door. Odds 50:50 are he forgot or thought he could get away with it. Make sure you bring a note in case he is out saying "Sorry to have missed you, I called about the money for your fence. Don't forget your share is $200 and I am happy to take a cheque. In case I miss you this week I'll be back on Friday next at 7.30pm. Have a nice day & See you soon, DF."

That's perfect!!!
 
I would try gently reminding him.

But as to the question, call me cynical, but after three years of law school, I don't believe anything unless it's in writing. :(
 
Depends on the people
My neighbor paid $400 for our fence and I immediately gave her my $200.

A neighbor's cat was hurt while she was at work and I took her to the vet and
paid the bill. She paid me back and bought me a thank you gift.
 
tyty333 said:
Have you tried a gentle reminder? Or left them a copy of the bill divided in two so they know you are expecting them to pay?

I'd do this. We had neighbors who purchased sand for a shared beach, and they left us a copy of the bill along with a note on who to make the check out to. We paid up promptly. :tongue:
 
Nope. I get everything (within reason) in writing. And I don't lend people money anymore. I feel like a miser when I have to say no, but I've probably lent out $1,000 or so that never got paid back. I could have a nice wedding band for that amount :(sad
 
the only time that i ever spoke with him was right after the new section of the fence was put up. he said...most of the time i work out town and only come back once a month,guess i'll need to catch him at right time or leave him a note.
 
Nashville said:
Nope. I get everything (within reason) in writing. And I don't lend people money anymore. I feel like a miser when I have to say no, but I've probably lent out $1,000 or so that never got paid back. I could have a nice wedding band for that amount :(sad
Absolutely. I never, ever lend money to friends especially. I will *give* it to them, especially for example my recently divorced single mom friend, but lend? Oh heck no!
 
LittleGreyKitten said:
Nashville said:
Nope. I get everything (within reason) in writing. And I don't lend people money anymore. I feel like a miser when I have to say no, but I've probably lent out $1,000 or so that never got paid back. I could have a nice wedding band for that amount :(sad
Absolutely. I never, ever lend money to friends especially. I will *give* it to them, especially for example my recently divorced single mom friend, but lend? Oh heck no!
:appl: can i give you my address? :bigsmile:
 
It's sad that even among the country group of people I spend time with, it's better to get things in writing nowadays. That being said, there are still those who live up to their word. My grandfather gave a friend a four wheeler, with the promise that ** WARNING FOR THOSE WHO ARE QUEASY** our family would get half a deer kill from him every year if he got any. That puts meat on our family's table, and gives the guy something to use that he otherwise wasn't going to be able to buy (elderly, only makes retirement, and his son buys his ammunition every season). We have more venison than any of us knows what to do with normally :rodent: .

Many times our farrier and vet will trust us to pay when we see them. We all work normal hours, and our vet comes for annual work in the middle of the day, and farrier comes mid morning. Usually we leave a check for the farrier, and the vet will send us a bill, or simply drop by when he knows we'll be home. They work on faith that we'll pay when we see them, and we do. Always.
 
shihtzulover said:
I'm sorry that you are dealing with this. Unfortunately, in my experience, most people's words are not good. It's really sad. :(

Especially when it come to paying money.
 
Dancing Fire said:
the only time that i ever spoke with him was right after the new section of the fence was put up. he said...most of the time i work out town and only come back once a month,guess i'll need to catch him at right time or leave him a note.
not suprised he hasn't paid yet, being there only once a month it is very easy to forget about it.
Leave him a nice note.
 
I hope he pays up. Hard lesson if he doesn't. What's that saying fences don't make good neighbors..

Next time you do something for all involved, you get the money upfront and then do the work...
 
I think it depends on the circumstances and sometimes thing can change.

When we moved in to our house 4 years ago I started doing bits of my neighbours garden - mainly cos I live right on the edge of a national park and we're not allowed to have fences etc, and the bits of the neighbours garden looked more like they belonged to my garden than her's.

Anyway a couple of things happened where she didnt keep her word and we kinda fell out with said neighbour for a couple of years. I was very disappointed with that but just a few weeks ago she came over and kind of made a peace offering which I was pleased about and meant a lot to me.

So maybe sometimes even if people dont keep their word immediately, if you still act graciously toward them they might - just might - change their behaviour over time.
 
I'm with B.E.G. on this one. Unless I get something in writing I assume I'll never see a dime. I don't lend anybody money, but I will give somebody money if they really need it.

One time the credit card machine at a deli I frequent was broke so the owner let me pay for my lunch the next day. I kept my word and paid her what I owed. It wasn't much, but I appreciated that she trusted I would come back and pay her. Maybe that just means I go there way too much! :tongue:
 
I agree with trying a gentle reminder. Some people occasionally forget. I even forgot once due to medical issues that came up.

Are people's words any good....

In most cases - yes. And, it helps how you phrase your conversation: "I know that you are a person of character who lives to their word" gives the other person something to live up too...

Now on the other hand - if you approach it with the attitude, and words, that imply that they are not good for it... you will probably get what you implied.

People are open to suggestion - and will often live to the standards you set for them.

In some cases, no they are not good for their word - and a signed and notarized document will not change a thing (and I really shy away from someone who is overly eager to sign an agreement as there are people who just want your $$$ and don't care what lie they have to do (or sign) to get it).

For small sums of money or minor things I lend and wait and see. No big loss if I never get it back - and its not worth the hassle to go the legal route.

For large sums of money or big items I will do a signed agreement. I've never had a default - although at times I have allowed repayment to stretch out for years due to challenges they other party had.

Have a great day,

Perry
 
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