Anyone else lost friends b/c of Market America?

[iluvcarats]

I have a friend who joined Market America about a year ago. Great for her - I hope it works. But I am sick of her trying to coerce me into it. I am just not interested. Just because I don''t want to buy the stuff or shop through her portal does not mean that I don''t want to be her friend, but she seems to think that if I am not supportive of Market America, I am not supportive of her. For whatever my reasons are, I think that she should just respect them. But since this company relies heavily on recruiting friends and family into "the business", there seems to be a "with us or against us mentality." I am really considering ending my friendship with her over this because I feel like she thinks of me more as a business opportunity than as a friend. Can anyone else relate to this?

 

[Lula]

Yes, I can. Over the years I have had friends invite me to "parties" for Pampered Chef, Silpada jewelry, Mary Kay, Arbonne....the list goes on. These "businesses" promise people wealth and independence, but to me are nothing more than legal -- and why exactly they are legal is beyond me -- pyramid schemes that benefit only a few at the top. Not to mention the stress it puts on family and friends to "support" the person in their business endeavor. Ick. Ick. And ick.

 

[monarch64]

I make no bones about telling friends who have those home parties to sell crap people don''t need to earn free crap they don''t need that I''m not interested in their schemes. I hate being invited to someone''s home and being expected to spend $50 and then asked if I want to host a party and scam all of MY friends. If you want to spend time with me and I''m going to have to spend money then let''s go have a two martini lunch instead.

I think you''ll just have to have a frank conversation with your friend and tell her that you just don''t want the product she''s selling. If she can''t separate business and friendship then it''s her problem and maybe you''ll just have to drift apart for the time being.

 

[Indylady]

I''ve been invited to lots of Avon parties and I always decline. I did have two old roommates do it at different times, and it just sucks to see them getting sucked into it. They end up buying a bunch of products at their "discounted" rate, because they think they''re getting a deal so they switch their entire makeup/skin care routine to Avon, and then they also have to buy samples they''re going to show people out of pocket. So, they end up spending at least $100-$150. Then of course, they have to try to sell it. They spend tons of time personalizing a webpage for their new "business", calling and emaling friends, trying to set up parties...

And then of course, you feel awkward if you don''t buy anything after your friend is working so hard to make this thing happen. But you don''t want to buy anything because, A) you know its overpriced since she gets 50% off of everything on her discount B) you don''t need or want it C) you can''t try it in the store to see if it works for you D) you don''t need or want it E) you would rather use your money for things that you really do need or want.

Its too bad you''re not a college student, because I used to use the, "I wish I could but I broke!" line in those situations. Once I did buy something, and it never shipped, so I had to go through this really long process through my friend through her Mary Kay "elder" through to the company and it was a serious PITA. Can you say something along the lines of, "I just don''t have the money to spend on things that I don''t need." ?

We used to have to do stuff like this in elementary school; we''d sell candy and wrapping paper out of a catalog at Christmas and if you sold enough you''d get a plastic toy, and if you sold more you''d get a bigger plastic toy. I can''t believe they made it into public schools and are using little kids to be their salesmen. ICK!

 

[lilyfoot]

Date: 6/17/2010 9:53:31 AM
Author: IndyLady
We used to have to do stuff like this in elementary school; we''d sell candy and wrapping paper out of a catalog at Christmas and if you sold enough you''d get a plastic toy, and if you sold more you''d get a bigger plastic toy. I can''t believe they made it into public schools and are using little kids to be their salesmen. ICK!

I haven''t lost any friends to the Avon/Mark Kay/whatever companies yet - but IndyLady''s post reminded me of how I hate this practice in public schools.

Last year, my coworker came to my desk with the catalog from her sons fundraiser, and just dropped it on my desk. There was no "Hey, would you like to take a look" or anything like that.

When I was in school, I never even tried to get people to buy things; I just had to resign myself to the fact that I wasn''t going to win the toy/money/prize/etc.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 6/17/2010 9:18:33 AM
Author: sarap333
Yes, I can. Over the years I have had friends invite me to ''parties'' for Pampered Chef, Silpada jewelry, Mary Kay, Arbonne....the list goes on. These ''businesses'' promise people wealth and independence, but to me are nothing more than legal -- and why exactly they are legal is beyond me -- pyramid schemes that benefit only a few at the top. Not to mention the stress it puts on family and friends to ''support'' the person in their business endeavor. Ick. Ick. And ick.

 

[lilyfoot]

btw, what is Market America?

 

[dragonfly411]

My mom actually sells party lite. I dont'' have a problem with it, and she fortunately doesn''t fall in with the recruit everyone thing. she''s just out to hopefully earn a bit extra and enjoy something different, so great for her!

 

[RaiKai]

I always detested the "chocolate/wrapping paper/meat/baking goods" selling things in school. Same for the girl guide cookie selling. The thing is they were usually "compulsory". We could take the stuff home and bring it back of course if we did not sell anything, but we could not "opt out". And there was always pressure through incentives or other peers to sell. I hated it! Part of why I hated it is it seemed to forget there are kids with very little family at all, or very little family with disposable income, to buy these things. That being said, when someone at work brings in a box of chocolates or cookies for their kids school, I tend to buy one. Mainly as I like chocolate, ha.

I feel the same way today about Tupperware parties, Avon parties, sex toy parties, and any such thing. There are at times the more questionable schemes too - goji berry juice for example. The current big trend is Mona Vie. It is a total scheme. The juice is tasty for sure....but it is NOT worth the $40 or whatever a bottle it is, the pressure tactics and so on. I saw a recently market show that looked at what Mona Vie really was nutritionally and so on and it is really just fancy juice. You can get the same benefits from other sources. DH and I have a couple family members on his side who try to sell that stuff, and we have seen people in Starbucks trying to team up on "friends" to bring them into it too. It''s like watching a car crash, and we want to run over there and tell the "friend" that his "friends" are taking him for a total ride. There is now a knock off of Mona Vie I have seen being sold with the same "scheme". I was recently at a home & garden show and on every aisle corner there was someone hawking the Mona Vie or the newer variant.

Quite frankly, when people ask me (or DH) to get involved or try and sell me on stuff or into the "fold", we reply by saying something along the lines of "sure, we would love some of your juice (i.e. Mona Vie), but only if you are offering it, as we aren''t buying it". In our experience, our friends and family learn pretty quickly not to bother with us.

I would say that you be very clear with your friend that you do NOT want to hear about her Market America stuff anymore, and particularly you do NOT want to hear her trying to coerce you anymore. And I would specifically state you are not sure your friendship will last if it does not stop. I think you will have your answer to how she values your friendship pretty quickly, and you can take the appropriate steps following that.

 

[Cehrabehra]

I can - different but same flavor... when I was preg with #1 and living in a state far far away from home I was doing some temp work and a woman in the office really befriended me. I felt so good having someone so interested in being friends, it felt good because I didn''t really know anyone that I clicked with. She checked in on me several times and at the end of the day wanted to stay in touch, maybe go out or get together. Awesome! So the next day was saturday and she called me but she wanted to know if my husband was available too and I figured okay, double date - no problem. Well then she asked me if we were interested in hearing about selling Amway and I said no... and she abruptly changed and said well then we can just skip the dinner and I said well just because I don''t want to sell amway doesn''t mean we can''t be friends and she said that at this time in her life she wasn''t interested in having friends who weren''t on the same page as she was and ended the call.

I was so hurt by this. Whattabitch!!

 

[monarch64]

Date: 6/17/2010 10:22:03 AM
Author: lilyfoot
btw, what is Market America?

I just googled it, and it looks annoying.