Any other LIW worrying about wedding costs?!?

[NakedFinger]

Just an interesting stat I received. Again, interesting because of all the gals I see on here posting their SO is giving them the "economy" excuse with proposing, lol.

Stat of The Week

Postponement of wedding due to economic issues:

No, we are not postponing 76.16%
Yes, by at least 3 months 3.87%
Yes, by 3 to 6 months 4.95%
Yes, by 6 to 12 months 5.11%
Yes, more than 12 months 9.44%
Canceling the wedding 0.46%

 

[princessplease]

I'm very worried. We're definitely scrimping on a lot of things to help cut costs. We're also looking into venues which offer sort of an 'all-inclusive' package. So far, we've found a venue which includes the ceremony, a DJ, cake, waitstaff, china, linens, and limo in addition to the food for a reasonable price ($60/pp before tax and gratuity. We actually negotiated her down on the price by $7/pp since our wedding is on a Friday night. We're looking at about 120 people, so $7/pp x 120 people=$840 saved because of a Friday reception!!!!!)
When we priced out the ceremony, DJ, limo and cake separate from all of the food, it came out to be a lot more, so we're saving by 'bundling'.
I'm also very crafty, so I plan on doing my own centerpieces (with help), and a lot of other things will be DIY.
I'm very fortunate to have an aunt that used to be a florist, so she's doing my flowers.
Even with all of this help and craftiness, I still worry significantly about costs. I worry a lot about the photographer costs. The I worry about dress costs, alterations, invites, etc, and I get so nervous about going over budget.
I also tried to prioritize what was really important to me. We really don't care about a honeymoon, so that's $2k-$5k we don't need to think about it, or can be used towards something else.
It's definitely possible to have an awesome wedding on a budget. You just need to be creative and plan ahead of time!

 

[Treasure43]

Thanks for all of your advice NakedFinger. Unfortunatly a 2009 wedding isn''t possible but we''re starting to look into some all-inclusive deals. We''re also going to talk with his parents who payed for his sister''s wedding a year or so ago and get their advice on ways to cut costs. I just feel like there are so many little things that add up. We thought about just eloping but neither of us wans to look back and wish that we''d had a wedding with our friends and family there. I guess it just all seems like a lot what with him saving up for the ring, us saving for the wedding and honeymoon, and then us saving for a house in the future. I''m not very crafty but perhaps I have some friends I can recruit!

 

[jaylex]

Date: 4/13/2009 7:55:59 AM
Author: ilovesparkles
JAYLEX - That was really, REALLY good advice! I''m sure I will also be researching budgeting books - hopefully at the library! LMAO! Cause why pay for a book that tells you how to saves your pennies!

Last night while hinting at this very subject, I told H that food is $25 per person, minimum no matter how you do it, he replies ''They can starve!''

Aww thanks, sparkles! I''m glad I could help!

As far as your budgeting book goes, go to a bookstore, browse for a book you would reference enough that it would actually make more sense to buy it and then find it on ebay. The other day, i got a brand new book that I would have spent $25 plus tax on in a bookstore for $6.28 or something ridiculous like that! If you are a cookbook or relationship book enthusiast like I am, imagine how much $ you would save in a year!!
Another money saving tip from Jaylex! lol

 

[jaylex]

Ooh! And I heard this book is a good one:
http://www.amazon.com/Bridal-Bargains-Throwing-Fantastic-Realistic/dp/1889392081

I''m probably going to have to check it out!

 

[fleur.de.lys.88]

Date: 4/13/2009 1:27:29 PM
Author: absolut_blonde
Oh yes, very much so. Weddings are EXPENSIVE! Yikes.


I've been looking at various vendors to get an idea of what we should actually expect and boy, it's pricey here. Most dinners seem to run $50-40 a head. I am not very crafty or much of a DIY type either.



SO's family is big and they are all very close - it would be difficult to cut the guest list down much. Realistically, we're looking at around 200 people at least. I'm a bit concerned about the budget, to say the least.

I can understand why you would be worried, 200 is a lot of people. But I'm sure you can find some fabulous deals, especially if you follow some of Nakedfinger's advice.

We're also paying for our own wedding because we want that freedom to make our own choices. And we're also looking to buy a house so keeping to the budget is very important to us. Buying the house of our dreams, and furnishing it, is far more important than an elaborate wedding. At least for us.

 

[ilovesparkles]

Thanks for the added info Naked Finger and the book recommendation Jaylex! This is becoming my new favorite thread on here! Mt new recent frustration and realization - I am going to most likely have to have a June or August wedding as my MOH and BM are teachers, the MOH out of state, and would have a real difficult time taking time off. So I was going to try and plan the date around the school year. Of course those are going to be busy, expensive months.

 

[absolut_blonde]

Date: 4/14/2009 1:45:59 AM
Author: fleur.de.lys.88

Date: 4/13/2009 1:27:29 PM
Author: absolut_blonde
Oh yes, very much so. Weddings are EXPENSIVE! Yikes.


I''ve been looking at various vendors to get an idea of what we should actually expect and boy, it''s pricey here. Most dinners seem to run $50-40 a head. I am not very crafty or much of a DIY type either.



SO''s family is big and they are all very close - it would be difficult to cut the guest list down much. Realistically, we''re looking at around 200 people at least. I''m a bit concerned about the budget, to say the least.

I can understand why you would be worried, 200 is a lot of people. But I''m sure you can find some fabulous deals, especially if you follow some of Nakedfinger''s advice.

We''re also paying for our own wedding because we want that freedom to make our own choices. And we''re also looking to buy a house so keeping to the budget is very important to us. Buying the house of our dreams, and furnishing it, is far more important than an elaborate wedding. At least for us.

Honestly, after seeing NakedFinger''s post I do wish we could throw together a 2009 wedding! As it stands, though, we probably won''t get engaged til summer-ish (I know it''s coming, and he''s told his friends about it but I don''t know specifically when) so that might be a little tough to pull off.

I hear ya about the house stuff - we just built ours and it really, really adds up. I actually think a big wedding is more important to my SO than me.... which is the opposite of all the stereotypes! I''d be happy with having only immediate family there.

 

[EricaR]

Just a note for all you crafty gals - don''t count on doint too much DIY! You won''t have the time. Trust me! I have a side business making greeting cards so I figured that I''d be able to make a TON of things easily. Hahahaaaaaa! It was a great idea, but as my time is counting down (11 days!!!) I''m quickly running out of time to do everything I had planned on. I''m finding myself spending more $$$ just to get finished things NOW on top of the supplies I had already purchased.

 

[adak]

We are getting married on a Monday (Labor Day of this year) in order to save on costs. The chapel is $1600 on the weekend, but only $500 for a weekday! And gorgeous, might I add.

We are planning a mid-afternoon ceremony to save on food costs. I am going to [attempt] to make the invitations. We''ll see how that goes!

I also plan on looking at white bridesmaid dresses instead of an actual wedding dress. Major savings there! For the honeymoon, we will probably drive to a nearby city (we''ve already been to Hawaii and a few other places together). With two kids between us already, I plan on spending as little as I can on this event!

 

[gryffindor]

Just to add on some of the things here...

I went to the library to look for books on wedding planning, but the selection at our library was practically nonexistent. Slim pickings at the nearby Borders as well. However, I drove out to a Barnes and Nobles further in the suburbs and they had a HUGE section just for wedding books. I looked through all the books, made notes of some that I liked, and came home to find them for less than half the cost on www.half.com. I haven''t bought them yet, I''ll be going back to do a round two check next this weekend. I did end up splurging on one book called "The Brides''s Book of Lists" for about $14 which has lots of reminders, lists, room for me to write notes and tabs for easy reference. It''s where I''ve started keeping track of all the thoughts and ideas that are coming to mind.

I REALLY wanted to pull off the November 2009 wedding, but I was met with some resistance from FI''s family who have to arrange travel visas for out of country guests. My mom also got really worried about the weather for a fairly large contingent of guests who will be driving from Buffalo. Realistically, April 2010 is better for us. I don''t want to wait so long, but I also don''t have the guts to chance a winter wedding in NJ (I''ve lived through plenty of birthdays and dinner parties being canceled over the years in NJ due to weather). Also, I''m not finding that Sundays and Fridays are a huge bargain compared to Saturdays, it''s like a difference of $5 - $10 per person. Yes that can add up to $3K when you''re having 300 guests, but I think this is once place we''ll have to splurge because of a large number of out of town guests we are expecting to drive and fly.

I''ve read some articles on how to negotiate as well. I''m not leaving any deal unturned.

 

[gryffindor]

Here is the planning book I bought that I am really liking:

http://www.amazon.com/Brides-Book-Lists-Things-Questions/dp/1586633104

There were also other spiral-bound planning books, but this was the most concise one I found that didn't break the bank.

 

[jaylex]

Date: 4/14/2009 7:51:07 AM
Author: ilovesparkles
Thanks for the added info Naked Finger and the book recommendation Jaylex! This is becoming my new favorite thread on here! Mt new recent frustration and realization - I am going to most likely have to have a June or August wedding as my MOH and BM are teachers, the MOH out of state, and would have a real difficult time taking time off. So I was going to try and plan the date around the school year. Of course those are going to be busy, expensive months.

You''re very welcome!
Aren''t date restrictions just the greatest?

A few months ago, bf mentioned that we "Needed" to get married on May 12th, 2012. I asked him why and he explained that it is our anniversary backwards. (We officially started dating on December 12th, 2005) So 12-12-05 to 05-12-12. I thought it was pretty adorable of him to think of that and when i realized that it was also a Saturday, I was pretty much sold on the date! Too bad it''s so far away

. So now we officially have an engagement ring and semi-officially have a wedding date... Now all I need is a proposal! lol.

 

[Treasure43]

Date: 4/14/2009 10:45:02 PM
Author: jaylex

Date: 4/14/2009 7:51:07 AM
Author: ilovesparkles
Thanks for the added info Naked Finger and the book recommendation Jaylex! This is becoming my new favorite thread on here! Mt new recent frustration and realization - I am going to most likely have to have a June or August wedding as my MOH and BM are teachers, the MOH out of state, and would have a real difficult time taking time off. So I was going to try and plan the date around the school year. Of course those are going to be busy, expensive months.

You''re very welcome!
Aren''t date restrictions just the greatest?

A few months ago, bf mentioned that we ''Needed'' to get married on May 12th, 2012. I asked him why and he explained that it is our anniversary backwards. (We officially started dating on December 12th, 2005) So 12-12-05 to 05-12-12. I thought it was pretty adorable of him to think of that and when i realized that it was also a Saturday, I was pretty much sold on the date! Too bad it''s so far away

. So now we officially have an engagement ring and semi-officially have a wedding date... Now all I need is a proposal! lol.

What an adorable idea So sweet that he came up with it!